The Ultimate TTGP Guide -- Newbies, Read This First!! — The Bump
Trying to Get Pregnant

The Ultimate TTGP Guide -- Newbies, Read This First!!

izza2izza2 member
edited November 2021 in Trying to Get Pregnant

Hello! Welcome to the Trying To Get Pregnant (TTGP) board!

This is a general how-to/information post to help you better understand the community and how the board generally works. All blue text are links to other posts for more information.
Once you've read through this post and feel more comfortable, please introduce yourself to the community. There are weekly introduction threads started every Monday for intro posts, where the community can get to know the newest members and welcome them.

First, please read these threads and learn the rules of this board:
The Bump Guidelines
Welcome New Members

Am I Pregnant?

First thing: it is against the forum rules to ask if you are pregnant (straight forward or in a round about way) and to post pictures of HPTs asking about lines. A line is a line=pregnant. The only place you can post your HPT is What Does A Positive Test Look Like in First Tri. If you are looking for a success story, the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd Trimester; Pregnant After Infertility or Pregnant After Loss boards are best suited for your question. We can not tell you if you are pregnant, so please don't ask. Take a test, if it's negative, lurk some more and get to know the community. If it's positive, congratulations, please move on to your BMB or First Tri and participate there.

The number one rule of this board is to lurk. Lurk and lurk some more. Please refrain from creating a new thread to ask any questions that have been asked recently. If you have a question regarding your cycle or chart, please ask in the Waiting To Ovulate (WTO) or Two Week Wait (TWW) threads. Otherwise, if you have a general question for the whole community, it may be better suited to start a new thread.

Trigger Warnings (TW)
Please be respectful and precede posts with a Trigger Warning (TW) for certain circumstances. This includes triggers such as all losses, BFPs, abuse, rape, violence, abortion, etc. It gives posters a heads up to either prepare themselves for what they're about to read or the courtesy to skip the post without reading something that could be traumatic for them. You do not need a TW for topics such as children, general pregnancy, etc.

Big Fat Positives (BFPs)
Once you get your Big Fat Positive test (BFP), the appropriate place to post is in the weekly Graduation Thread. Please do not post your BFP in the TWW thread. Please do not include your HPTs – those can be shared in the previously mentioned positive test thread.

Things to Avoid
1) Do not dirty delete. If you get flamed, please do not delete your post (you most likely have already been quoted anyways). Future lurkers/posters can and may learn from the experience.
2) The term baby dust is not accepted here. The term is particularly offensive and hurtful to those who have unfortunately had to cremate their baby. Please be considerate to those TTC After Loss.

“Late” & “Light” Periods
If you are concerned you are late but are getting negative tests, it is very likely you have ovulated later than you thought or you may not have ovulated yet. Your body is not a machine and it will vary cycle to cycle. You are regular until you're not. You will not always ovulate on the same day every cycle. If you think you may be pregnant, test once a week until you get your period or a positive test. If you hit cycle day 60, talk to your doctor about jump starting your next cycle.

If you are just coming off of birth control, it may take time for your body to regulate and get back to normal. This is normal. Your body has to get back in the habit of producing the hormones that birth control was suppressing. It is not uncommon for it to take a few months before your cycles return to your normal. One woman's experience will not necessarily be the same for you. Every body is different.

You have had your period if there is enough bleeding to fill a pad or tampon, no matter how light or heavy is it, or how short or long it lasts. This is not the same as spotting. Period heaviness and length can change time to time. You're normal until you're not.

Tools While TTGP
Your Chances

Always assume you are the rule, not the exception. You have about a 20% chance of conception each cycle you ovulate. It can take a normal, healthy couple up to 1 year to get pregnant. If you still aren't pregnant after a year of consistent and/or well-timed sex, schedule an appointment with a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). If you're 35 years old or older, this is cut down to 6 months of trying with consistent/well-timed sex. If you are having recurrent miscarriages, unfortunately, the norm is to wait until at least a 3rd miscarriage before seeing a specialist.

Fertility Friend (FF) is the charting resource most posters use to monitor their cycles. It is a wealth of information on charting. It is free to sign up and use (VIP is available for purchase). There are tutorials to read and learn about how to chart and what the different fertility signs mean. There is also a fun game you can play to test out your skills on detecting ovulation. FF also has a great FAQ section on their website about charting topics such as temping when working night shifts, alcohol and temping, traveling, luteal phase length, and detecting ovulation. This board recommends charting because it can help relieve the stress of not knowing where you are at in your cycle as well as many other reasons.

If you think you might have trouble getting pregnant, there is a RESOLVE Fertility Assessment that may help you. It specifically screens for symptoms related to female infertility as well as male factor infertility. PCOS, Endometriosis, Thyroid Disease, etc. are all conditions that can (but not always!) lead to infertility. However, this does not replace testing done by an RE or your OBGYN, and it should not be used to self-diagnose. Do not borrow trouble by assuming you suffer from infertility (IF) because you have not gotten pregnant yet. Only a physician can diagnose you with IF.

If you are on Clomid/Femara, please be aware of the risks. You should only be taking Clomid/Femara under strict supervision of a RE. We have many women who have been on or are currently on one of the two drugs and would be happy to share their experiences and potential negative-effects with you. For more information, please read this post.

Most posters advise reading the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility (TCOYF) by Toni Weschler. She came out with a new 20th anniversary edition July 2015. You will learn more than you thought possible from this book. It has information on how to maximize your chance of conception, the different phases of and key events in your menstrual cycle, fertility issues, and so much more!

Basal Body Temperature (BBT)
Temping (tracking your BBT) is how most posters on this board confirm ovulation. The Mabis Basal Body Thermometer is the thermometer this board generally recommends for temping. It does not favor temps like other BBTs (i.e., Target, CVS, etc.) Getting a BBT over a regular thermometer is important because some women have subtle temp shifts and BBTs are precise to the hundredths. BBT is the only accurate way to track your ovulation at-home.

Ovulation/Implantation Bleeding
Implantation and ovulation bleeding are not common, and it can only be confirmed in hindsight. Always assume you are the rule, not the exception. Basal Body Temperature (BBT) implantation dips and ovulation spikes can only be confirmed in hindsight as well. Temperatures can fluctuate for any number of reason, not just for implantation and ovulation.

Ovulation Predictor Kits (OPKs)
OPKs are a great secondary resource to BBTs. They will tell you when your body is having a Leutenizing Hormone (LH) surge. LH is the hormone that stimulates the release of an egg. The LH surge can last as little as 12 hours, and it is possible to have multiple surges in one cycle. That is why many posters advise to have sex until Fertility Friend gives you crosshairs. It is also possible to get a positive OPK for more than one day. A positive OPK does not guarantee you will ovulate. Respectively, a negative OPK cycle does not mean you didn't ovulate; it's not uncommon to not turn an OPK positive. Many posters recommend the Wondfo OPKs (please be aware of Wondfo fakes) and the ClearBlue OPKs. Please refer to the instructions of the OPK you are using to see if you can test multiple times a day, should use first morning urine or not, or what the results of your OPK can indicate.

Cervical Fluid (CF) and Cervical Position (CP)
If you are having a hard time discerning the differences in your cervical mucus and cervical position, you are not alone. Here are a few threads that should help you figure it out:
The Cervix Feels Like A Penis
Beautiful Cervix (NSFW)
How To Detect CP and CM For Your Charts

Pre-Seed is a lubricant that won't kill sperm. It is made for those who do not produce enough fertile cervical fluid (egg white cervical mucus) to help facilitate sperm. In general, less is more when using Pre-Seed. Note: Pre-seed does not increases your chances of conceiving, it is simply a lubricant that will not kill sperm.

Prenatals and Alcohol
It is recommended that when you start TTC you take a prenatal, that way key nutrient stores are already beginning to build up in your system before you get pregnant. It is very important to get enough Folic Acid in order to help reduce the risk of certain birth defects. DHA is also recommended as it aids in brain and eye development. If you are considering gummy prenatals, they do not contain iron or calcium (if that is important to you).

Many posters here adhere to the phrase "drink until it's pink." As of now, it is believed that mother and baby do not share blood in the very early stages of pregnancy. Therefore, alcohol will not be shared with the developing baby and poses little to no risk to the baby. It is mostly a matter of personal preference whether you decide to forgo alcohol once you enter the TWW or wait until you turn a test positive.

Some helpful tips for the WTO/TWW threads
These threads are a good way to get your foot in the door on this board and start getting to know the community. Use these threads to complain about symptoms (the only place on this board that won't be flamed for symptom spotting) and ask questions related to your FF chart, ovulation, and the TWW. There is a spot on these threads specifically meant for any questions and chart stalks you may need (Q/CS).

-Month/Cycle = How many months you have been TTC/how many cycles you have been TTC. These will not always be the same.
-WAYDTGKU = What Are You Doing To Get Knocked Up? Are you are temping, charting, or observing cm and cp; sex frequency; OPK; prenatal; medication; diet; etc.?
-Timing = When you had sex during your fertile window: -5, -4, -3, -2, -1, 0, or +1. Day 0 is ovulation (O) day. -1 is the day before O, -2 is two days before O, etc. +1 is the day after O and is included for standard error. Anything outside of these times is not considered your fertile window and should not be considered.

If you have already started TTC but are now benched or Trying To Avoid (TTA), you may not feel comfortable on the WTO or TTW threads. There is a weekly Benched/TTA thread where you can check-in and talk with others in similar situations.

How-To Guides
-How to GIF
-How to add a signature
-How to quote: Hit the "quote" at the bottom of the post you want to quote. You will be taken to the reply box with the quote set up already.
-How to tag: Add a "@" in front of the username of the person you are talking to.
-How to search: Please use the search function located in the top right corner on mobile, or in the bottom right at the bottom of the page on desktop. You can narrow your results by just searching on the TTGP board. You can also use Google and search the entire TheBump website that way.
-How to change your username: log in to TheKnot, hover over My Knot, and click Account Settings. If you are having issues doing it that way, you can email [email protected] and ask them to change your username. Give them a few suggestions just in case your top choice is taken. It may take up to 24 hours for the name to update.

Most Common Abbreviations
A comprehensive list can be found here. This link is found at the bottom of every page of TB (Community Glossary).
Some TTGP acronyms often used or not listed there are…
BBT = basal body temperature/thermometer
BETA = blood test for HCG
BG = Bump gods
CD = cycle day
CS/Q = chart stalk and/or question
DOR = diminished ovarian reserve
DPO = days post ovulation
DE = donor eggs/embryos
ED = every day
EOD = every other day
FF = Fertility Friend
GL = good luck
GTKY = getting to know you
HIO = hump it out
NTNP = not trying not preventing
QFP = quoted for posterity/preservation/permanence
R/R = rants and/or raves
SS = speshul snoflayke (also used for symptom spotting)
T&P = thoughts and prayers
TLDR = too long didn't read
TTA = trying to avoid
TWW = two week wait
WAYDTGKU = what are you doing to get knocked up
WK = white knight
WTO = waiting to ovulate

For more, in-depth comments and suggestions from posters on what they would say if they could tell a newbie anything, read this thread.

Please take the time to let all of this information sink in and make sure your questions have not already been answered here or on another thread. We hope you stick around (hopefully not too long!) and benefit from the wonderful support and knowledge this community has to offer. Good luck!

Me: 25 | DH: 29 | DSS: 9
TTC #1: Aug - Nov '15 (TTA N'15-J'17 for Nursing School)
TTC #1 take two: July 2017 (NTNP); August 2017 (actively TTGP)
BFP 10/9 @ 10 DPO; EDD June 23, 2018

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