Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: June Venting/FFC/WTF
My a-hole cat pissed me the heck off. You know how most cats like their indepedence and go off on their own. Not this cat. She is always up our butts and I feel bad because I don't have as much time to give her anymore. Around 8:30 S woke up and started crying which is super weird. She went right back to sleep. I decided to go check on her before I came to bed just to make sure she was ok. When I get to the door, the cat is meowing in her room. She must have been under the crib when I put S to bed. When I open the door to let her out S woke up crying. I had to calm her a bit before she was able to put herself back to sleep. This cat woke her up twice and I'm just so irritated with her. Sorry this was super long and probably belongs in a petty problem type of thread. I just hope it doesn't mess S up for the rest of the night.
We have an official man cold in my house.
Me: guess you're too weak to eat them then. Sorry about your luck
she wanted attention 24/7 and it got too much. Before I worked, but as I'm still on maternity leave she thought I was available all the time. She started doing things that weren't allowed just to get attention and I was afraid I would ruin such a sweet adorable cat.
So she's now living with a 89 year old lady who has no family left and her days are all about the cat. I only had to promise this lady that I'll take the cat back if she dies before the cat.
My cat has forgotten about me I think.
I miss her, but it's definitely easier.
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He did just tell me he wants his ashes scattered wherever we scatter our cats ashes when she dies. Uh....
@Ladybug2821 Ugh my cat too! Last night he pissed me off so much. I was up on the computer (which I don't do often anymore) so he thought it would be fun to tear back and forth and meow super loud. LO was sleeping and he almost woke her up so many times! H & I need to make more of a point to play with him. Our animals have been slightly neglected since LO came.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019After A was born and our older dog died, we put our dog in doggie daycare 2-3x per week and it has helped tremendously. He's exhausted when he comes home and he loves to go there. The hardware store is around the corner and every time we head there, he starts trotting and tries to pull us to daycare.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019I would definitely go prepared with your job description and all of the things that you are doing above and beyond as proof of why you are a quality employee.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019I wouldn't push the solids if he doesn't want it. Maybe just let him play with the spoon or a sippy cup of formula when everyone else is eating and see if he tries to mimic everyone around him. If he'll take a boob, give him the boob and if the bottle is the problem, maybe a different flow nipple or bottle entirely might be the solution. I'm not a good bottle person, but I know some formula fed babies who have responded really well to TommyTippee bottles. And if he won't surpass 4 oz, then stop at 4 and offer it more often and see if it creeps up then. And if you're able, maybe see if someone else can offer the bottle once in a while in case it makes a difference (I know it does for me).
Truthfully, we all know two things: 1.) they can read our emotions pretty well, so the calmer you are, the calmer he will be and 2.) If he's smiling and functioning, then he's thriving,which means he is ok even though the scale might not be where the pediatrician wants it.
Deep Breathes. And Carry On, Mama. You can do this.
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
You've got a cute, smiley little guy so keep that in mind
I think one of the harder things is that he IS my 4th and I feel like I should know all the answers by now? I never had this issue with my girls (although they were never big babies... They ate).. I've tried so many different foods, different bottles and nipple flow for formula and it doesn't make a difference. He is starting to outright refuse the bottle from my husband and I'm not sure why (and he has little patience if Nick won't take it immediately so that doesn't help). I left late for work last night because I finally got him to take it and didn't want to interrupt him. I guess I'm frustrated too because he really is a happy otherwise healthy baby so I wasn't really concerned before his pedi brought it up and now I feel like instead of being the laid back mom I usually am I'm stressed about stupid stuff like him eating food. He is pooping just fine. I just kind of figured he was a smaller baby but I'm anxious about what the doc will say on Wednesday. I'm hoping 1lb is enough because between today and Wednesday not much will change.
My LO had a period of only drinking 4oz or less, so I offered the bottle more often. It was still small bits, but together they were a wee bit more.
I also would offer pieces of food and let him 'play' with it. Who knows something might and up in his mouth.
I like the idea of @sandnstarsnj to have him sitting with you when you are eating. It has worked for my LO.
I had to have similar foods as her, cause she wanted the same. So I had kids friendly food for a week. Thick soups, yoghurt when she had fruitpuree, bread when she had bread etc. We shared one plate when eating bread. And I'd take bites of her food/spoon when feeding her. She got interested in foods and now 'steals' it from others.
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- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019@m6agua He was 6 months and weighed 12lbs 5oz. He was 11lbs 8oz at his 4 month appt.. So he gained less than a pound in those 2 months. That was the first time his doc had then charted his weight. He didn't mention percentiles.. But I'm assuming He is low. He is proportionate and meeting his milestones so I don't know. It's just frustrating.
Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
you got this!
https://www.amazon.com/Helping-Child-Extreme-Picky-Eating/dp/162625110X
she also believes that her son`s non-eating is a sensory signal issue and she said this book helped them
https://www.amazon.com/Understanding-Your-BABYs-Sensory-Signals/dp/1496152484/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1497973600&sr=1-1&keywords=understanding+your+child's+sensory+signals+baby
My LO is probably teething and I couldn't find her amber necklace. She's biting on everything!
Shes also in the middle of crawling, as she's on her knees and hands and rocking. She gets sooooo angry. On top of that she wants to sit, sit on her knees and stand. And preferably all done and learnt yesterday.
Its 86F here and we are not build for that.
So besides being frustrated it's too warm too nap.
My sister is not keeping her promise as to help out. She hasn't babysit once, yet has done this with another baby and I always say yes to her.
I moved bloody countries to be closer!
I wrote my first ever solicitation letter in my mother tongue which I haven't used often in the last 11 years and she didn't even bother to have a read through even though she's a teacher.
My maternity leave is soon over and I need a job and it frightens me, what if I don't find one? I left an amazing job and an amazing country to be closer to my family and been stupid to believe their promises of helping.
I only need 1 night of sleep, just 1 so I can function again.
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Theres really nothing I can say to help or make things seem a bit better and I imagine crazy positivity will just drive you more crazy.
Hopefully you manage a full night sleep soon. In the meantime, vent away and hugs sent your way.
Me. That someone is me.