November 2016 Moms

June Venting/FFC/WTF


Re: June Venting/FFC/WTF

  • m6aguam6agua member
    @kristah2 Can you go to the party without him? I mean I get being sad, but you still have to live your life.
    TTC#1 July 2015 
    • BFP: 9/16/15 — MC: 11/8/15 Blighted Ovum
    • BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
    TTC#2 April 2019 
    • BFP: 9/12/19 — EDD 5/15/20

  • ZoeFerZoeFer member
    @kristah2 I completely understand the feeling for the house. My H does not do the cleaning at all, although he always think that he is doing so much at home. I hate cleaning, and I really do not have energy to clean on top of working full time, cooking , doing the dishes and feeding the baby. I suggested to hire someone to do some heavy cleaning every other week or so. Can you get someone to help you with the cleaning at least? For me, if the apartment is a mess i do not know where to start and i cannot clean it at all. 
    And i do not think you are a bad wife/person at all for wanting to go to the party. 
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  • I'm about to lose my shit. My husband's stone hasn't passed yet and they're sending him home. With some oxycodone and Motrin. Which is what they gave him when he first came in last night and it did NOTHING. If we end up in the ER again tonight, I am going to go ballistic.
  • @RhodaMorgenstern seriously?! That sounds miserable. Hopefully it passes soon and doesn't result in another emergency visit 
  • That's a tough spot to be in @kristah2. I can't imagine how DH must feel today; I still struggle with the day my grandmother passed and that was over 10 years ago. If he's OK to be alone, I would take LO to the party for a few hours for "you time" and then later be there for DH if he needs it. Let the mess ride... it only gets worse as the kid get older :).

    @RhodaMorgenstern Oh geez that's going to be a lot of people needing you tonight. Try to take some short minutes of quiet time for yourself and each minute at a time. The stones will pass and maybe afterwards you can make a labor joke (if he can appreciate that). Good luck and may everyone be kind to you.
    Married: 08.05.11
    Welcomed baby girl: 06.10.14
    Second pregnancy EDD: 06.16.16 MC: 10.29.15
    Welcomed baby boy: 11.25.16
  • kvrunskvruns member
    @kvruns how odd, has anyone been able to explain it?
    PS I clearly do not want to be at work and have zero energy or desire to do anything other post on the Bump.
    I called and it was what I thought - since he was diagnosed with the ear infection at the appointment they have to charge for an office visit, otherwise they can't do the prescription. She said the office visit gets billed at a lower rate (it was $59 vs normal $99 or maybe $119) but for me it was $27.72 vs a copay of $30 so really no difference. 

    Good thing I have a big balance in my HSA because this is the 5th copay I've paid for this kid already 
  • kvrunskvruns member
    @kristah2  YOU ARE NOT A BAD WIFE.  In all caps because I think you could use that reminder. FWIW I know those in the US lament the Canadian maternity leave policies but seriously I couldn't do it so more power to you. Sometimes these husbands need a reminder that staying home with the baby is a full time job in itself and that you don't just sit around all day twiddling your thumbs and neglecting the house. The house still has to be both people's job. That being said, my H gets cranky around the anniversary of his mom's death (well when he remembers it) and it's been 21 years. I wouldn't approach a subject about the cleaning or him not doing his part today, I'd give him his space and go to the party myself if necessary. But then later this weekend make sure he realizes all you are doing and that you need him to hold up his end of the bargain or figure out a way to get someone in to help.

    @RhodaMorgenstern that stinks. I guess they figure there isn't anything the hospital can do to make it pass vs what happens at home? Can you line someone else up for emergency care just in case tonight?
  • @kvruns thanks. I needed that! 
    Then I took a long nap in my clean sheets. H still isn't close to leaving work so we wouldn't make the BBQ now anyway so I guess I have to suck it up. I did tell him to bring me home a coffee and Chinese. 
  • They're mainly a trauma hospital and clearly do not gaf unless you have s gunshot wound. They needed the bed. When they sent him home (with a paper script and a good luck), he explicitly asked if there was anything he shouldn't eat, they said no, it was all fine. They told him to make a follow up appointment with a urologist and they were all "Sorry, no appointments until July 24th." I was furious and called the urology department at the hospital where I had A (about 20 minutes away vs 10) and they found time for him next week. And as I hang up with them, the nurse goes "Did the ER tell you he can't have salt, red meat or seafood?" I could scream in frustration.
  • Definitely not a bad wife @kristah2
    I too am still on maternity leave and could use help cleaning. And it's just me making a mess! 
    Hope you get to see your friend even though you can't make the BBQ!

    Oh man @rhodamorgenstern! Keep going strong!! Sorry we don't live close by to help out. That mummy group is amazing, wish we had sth similar here.


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  • ZoeFerZoeFer member
    @RhodaMorgenstern I had kidney stones few times . when the stone blocked by ureter, it was almost as bad as my labor contractions. I had gone to the ER that time, because i did not know what it was and we thought that it was appendicitis or sth. anyway they found out what it was and just gave me painkillers. I saw few urologists and they did not do anything except giving me antibiotics (bec of urinary tract infection), advising me to drink water. I have never heard the red meat or seafood actually. Kidney stones occur due to many different reasons, some people have it bec of meat , some from veggies etc. And unfortunately there is not much to do, unless it is too big  , then they do a small surgery to break the stone. I know it is frustrating, but there is not much to do unfortunately at least urgently.
  • How did your night go @rhodamorgenstern
    Hope it was a smooth one!


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  • Ok but not great. My husband was drugged out of his mind and I couldn't fall asleep until 11 because I was anxious. A got up around 6, as per usual. Normally on Saturdays, I play with her in our bed and then she naps from 8:25-9:30ish. I got up with her, gave her a pouch and she fell asleep nursing but the dog kept kicking her and I can't sleep upright. My sister got here around 10 so we went for a walk and wore her out. Hopefully we can all pass out when A goes to bed at 7. Thanks for asking @tvh1982
  • Hoping tonight goes better @RhodaMorgenstern!
  • kvrunskvruns member
    Oh lord I think I'm joining the baby poop splosion in the car club. This is 2 days in a row thank god it's on the way to my parents so we can clean it out there. 
  • @kvruns welcome!! Haha
  • kvrunskvruns member
    @leighry how the hell do you deal with this every day? I mean I feel like I would need a 2nd car seat 
  • @kvruns honestly I have taken some "chux" pads home from the hospital I work at to put under him or even just a plastic bag sometimes so at least if he does explode it's on something I can remove and toss. Sometimes I'm wild and roll the dice on him containing his bowels. 
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