Finally got caught up here. We just moved into our house yesterday and its been chaotic. Internet is still not set up so I'm limited to my phone.
Big hugs to all those who had a crappy moment or day or shit things happening to them. I hope the rest of the week look up from here on. Also happy belated bday to @Jen_Shoes, I hope you treated yourself!
I will try to chime in more later this week when/if I get my computer set up. Otherwise I'll be around lurking or participating on the smaller threads
Busy day in the random thread! @mrsrep123 so incredibly sorry for your sudden loss. Sending healing vibes your way, and to all those who had a rough start to the week.
Home buying was the best decision we ever made. After renting for years and moving often, we really needed to feel settled in a space of our own. We made a list of our requirements (bed/bathrooms, yard size, proximity to work, nearby amenities, etc), and then hunted for a long time until we found the right spot. My best advice while searching is that you can't get too emotionally invested in a place that you're not able to walk away if negotiations aren't working out. There are lots of houses out there, and you'll find the right one for your family.
Today was a high-low day here: it's my birthday so we visited Seattle and explored some of the coolest places, had a great adventure, and even got free dessert (highs); but it was super cold, I had a super cranky toddler who refused to nap at all, and my wife was combative for no real reason (lows). Thankfully, I've gotten good at protecting my own experience emotionally, but it was a challenge today, and selfishly I didn't want to deal with any bullshit on my birthday. Fingers crossed tomorrow will be a better day.
@chailife34 Happy Birthday! I didn't realize you were in the Seattle area, I'm glad it was a beautiful (although cold) sunny day for your birthday! Such a rare treat here. I tried to soak up as much vitamin D as possible today! Also, I'll have to pick your brain for the cool places you visited today! We have a Washington Bucket List going while we are here!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@mrsrep123: I'm sorry to hear about your dog. <<hugs>> I can't imagine what to do in that situation. What a horrible shock, so sad. If you don't mind sharing further, what did he do when he found her?
@chailife34: happy belated! It sounds like you had a great time despite the lows. Sending you good vibes for a nice day today!
Thanks for the opinions on houses! It's good to hear that people are pretty happy with their decision. We're seeing one on Sunday, but we're not rushing into anything.
@mrsrep123, I'm so sorry about your dog. You've talked about your dogs before and I could tell they're a huge part of your family. Hang in there.
@chailife34, happy birthday! Seattle sounds like a great place to visit.
Random: I decided to give up sugar for the month of February except in fruits, veggies, and grains (I'm not cutting out rice and bread completely, that's nuts). I like doing little challenges for myself, and after watching that Fed Up documentary, I really wanted to try to limit my sugar intake. Anyways, I'm sitting here eating my oatmeal with only cinnamon and no sugar and it's kind of the worst. Haha hopefully by the end of the month, my taste buds have gotten used to it. I'll also load up on fruit so that I at least have something sweet around.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@kns1988 have you tried putting fruit into the oatmeal? I wasn't sure from the post if you were doing that. It really helps me eat oatmeal with less sugar (I'm not quite sugar-less). Strawberries or apples are my favorites to add directly to the oatmeal. If you're already doing that go ahead and skip on .
As far as home ownership goes that is a tough one. We love having our home and it would be tough to rent a home like the one we have in our area. That being said, I am the most handy one at home and I'm not super handy. I get frustrated bc when something breaks DH always wants to call a repair person instead of trying to figure it out. You tube has been my friend to fix several things and now that my dad is retired he helps us by showing us/teaching us how to do things if he is able to make the trip up.
Other home buying advice: Be sure to look into things like property taxes and HOA fees as PPs have mentioned. Those can really get you. The most important thing I've learned (I've bought and sold 3 houses now) is that getting emotionally tied to a house while shopping is a terrible thing. Always be prepared to walk away. There are no perfect houses and red flags shouldn't be over looked just because you "love" a certain house. If you don't have the budget for a renovation don't go buying a fixer upper just because you love it. It will drown you. If the heating needs replaced and the roof and the electric don't over look that either. You WILL find another house you love just as much!
@kns1988: @rkstro2 has a good point about the fruit! I'll also suggest adding a sprinkle of truvia/stevia, if you still want that sweet taste, without the calories and spike in blood glucose.
@kns1988 when I was 19 or 20 I went on a vocational retreat at a convent. When they served us oatmeal with no sugar, I thought "there is no way I can be a nun if this is what you have to eat".
As far as home owning goes I love it. I am pretty lucky that DH is super handy and actually works in home remodel/repair. With that in mind we bought a total fixer upper for dirt cheap because I loved the yard and the location. DH literally rebuilt the entire house in 4 months. If he were not such a handyman, I can imagine it would be a bit more stressful. Another thing to consider obviously is school district and property taxes/HOAs like pp have mentioned.
Hugs to all that need them, it seems like I missed a busy couple of days.
The good: I passed my 1 hr glucose test.
The bad: I feel like I am drowning in school the last couple of days with a constant WTH was I thinking going to school full time this pregnant. Anyways, it's been kicking my ass big time.
The ugly: kids have a tummy bug and after this week, we will be needing to steam clean the carpet in the playroom..... gross!
Wow! It's been a busy afternoon! I, too, feel like it's a struggle making friends as an adult especially if you've moved out of state, or continue to move. We've ran into that moving to Florida, and I did when I moved to Cali from Ohio.
As as for buying a house, we're currently in the process and should hopefully close end of February. We did the FHA loan and so far has been okay, but I'm still waiting for something to happen. We're tired of renting too!
Question and totally random from the discussions going on...we are planning on cloth diapering and I think I've got that down, but we will also be utilizing daycare once I go back to work and they don't accept them (boo). So, I have no idea what size diapers to get, if we should try to stock up now, how many do you send with them to daycare...???? So many questions! And here I thought we would save some money! Will it cost the same as if we were using them at home or no because we won't use them at night?
My daycare seems to change my DS who is about 1.5 usually 4-5x in about 8 hours. Way more than I change him at home but he is always nice and dry. We just send a large sleeve of diapers and they let me know when they are running low.
@kns1988, I echo all of the above thoughts on homeownership! We bought about 2 years ago after years of renting and we have had zero regrets. One piece of advice, if you can, try to shoot for the very low end of your budget. A scary piece of home ownership is that it is such a big financial commitment and its a lot less stressful if you know you could manage the mortgage for a few months even if life throws you a big financial curve ball. Under shooting what you can afford will also give you a little extra money for unexpected house expenses and making the house "your own". In my experience, banks are still willing to loan way more than they should, which really just hurts the homeowners.
I'm home sick today after being up basically all night with extreme heart burn and indigestion. I feel like complete crap and just wanted to complain, lol...bumping on mobile so I know there were more of you I wanted to reply to, but it's not happening. Maybe I'll get the motivation to drag out the laptop later...
Under shooting what you can afford will also give you a little extra money for unexpected house expenses and making the house "your own". In my experience, banks are still willing to loan way more than they should, which really just hurts the homeowners.
So true! Just because you get preapproved for $500k, doesn't mean you can meet your payments every month. Only take on the debt you can afford to repay.
When we were house-hunting, we found this great house right in the center of this cute idyllic New England town. So nice. Met all of our criteria. We got into conversations with the listing agent and everything. Then we looked closer at the details. Property taxes were $6,000 a year, which is an extra $500 a month that we didn't have (and! it didn't include school taxes or garbage pick-up or any other town services!), so we had to walk away. Tough lesson to learn, but it helped us make smarter decisions. You have to look at all the taxes, services, and homeowners insurance amounts you'd pay for any one particular property.
For another property, backing up to a creek, our mortgage company required we purchase flood insurance. Yet another cost to have to budget for. Really be thorough in checking out the property!
Do you guys think we could do an updated Baby(ies) sex poll now that everyone who knows is going to know and we have a more finalized group? You know how people will say there always seems to be a wave of boys then girls? Well I'm curious if our current group swings more one way than the other.
This is a pretty random question, but what do you do with all of your maternity clothes? Or, during maternity time, what do you do with all of your regular clothes?
I literally cannot fit into anything nonmaternity, so now I have two wardrobes. I do not have room for two wardrobes. There are clothes everywhere, in piles, and it's terrible.
NBR: We just found out that our loan was approved and we will be moving forward with our home purchase! We're super excited. The house is great, but has some cosmetic issues. Neither my husband nor myself have great interior decorating skills, so I need some advice. Currently, the upstairs hallway/stairs/master bedroom all have a nice beige/white carpet- however, 2 of the other bedrooms off of that hallway (which will both be kids' rooms) need help. One has dark green carpet (I think they used it as a weird putting green room?) and the other has blue tile (no idea wtf is going on there).
So, my question for those of you with decorating skills/good taste is: Would it be weird to just re-carpet those 2 rooms, without re-carpeting the hallway? If not, should we try to match the hallway carpet, or do you think white/beige is unwise for kids' room carpeting? We'd also consider a wood laminate with area rugs- any thoughts on that vs. carpet?
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
@jayandaplus I keep my summer and winter clothes separate because I don't like them mixing. All off seasoned clothes go in shallow bins under our bed. Right now, as I keep knocking out regular clothes as "no longer fit", they're just in a stack in my closet. Once I get out the summer clothes (Prob March) they'll go away with the winter clothes, because they technically are. Once I'm done with maternity clothes, I think I'll store them wherever I end up storing outgrown baby clothes. Most likely, in the under stair storage.
@jayandaplus: Same here. I spent like 2 hours this weekend packing away my "normal/regular" clothes---all those things I def can not fit into now, and won't for awhile. I didn't want them getting in the way for the next 6 months. I hated looking at my shelves, seeing so many things that didn't fit me.
I used an under-the-bed tote for some, a random shelf for others, and put a full box in the attic (mostly winter stuff that I won't wear again soon anyway). Also started a bag of donation clothes. Now my wardrobe/closet is full of only those things that fit me now; like, all I see is stuff that fits, and I can reach in and grab anything and be happy about it. No more being disappointed & shuffling piles of shirts around.
Do you have any place you can stash clothes for 6 months?
@kayemjay2 I'd definitely re-do those 2 rooms. You could do a completely different carpet and still keep it somewhat cohesive. However, I'd opt for wood laminate as I am a HUGE fan of that. If you decided not to, then I'd do the carpeting as close to the rest of the house as possible. You could always have it treated.
@kayemjay2 that's great! We just found out that the house appraised for less than what our contract sales price is...so now we have to see what the sellers are willing to do. I'm really hoping they are okay with it and will still help with closing! Ugh...so stressful...
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I'm finally getting caught up with this thread. Big hugs to everyone that needs it, especially those that have lost pets. My mom's puppy passed away last night and I know how hard it is when one of your family members dies.
@kayemjay2 that's great! We just found out that the house appraised for less than what our contract sales price is...so now we have to see what the sellers are willing to do. I'm really hoping they are okay with it and will still help with closing! Ugh...so stressful...
Thanks! We haven't had our appraisal yet, but I'm nervous about that possibility. Hopefully the sellers are willing to lower the price for you- that would be great!
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
@nda_roxybabe - Thanks for your input! The more I think about it, the more I'm leaning towards wood laminate, though I know my husband is firmly on team carpet. I would think laminate would be easier to clean up kid messes, and we could get area rugs which would be easily replaceable once the inevitable kid stains happen.
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
@kayemjay2 - We did a light grey carpet in our bedrooms, and I don't worry about stains too much. I would say either try to match the hall as closely as possible or check on the price to include the hall as well. If it isn't much square footage, it might not add greatly to the cost.
Hugs and love to everyone going through a pet loss and everyone having a hard time right now. I'll be thinking of you.
One other thing to consider about home ownership, we seem to encounter a $1k-3k expense/disaster once a year. My house is only 10 years old. So far we've: replaced the A/C, had pool issues, broken a very large, expensive patio door w/ a rock thrown from the weed whacker, paid the insurance deductible after a $13 dollar part broke on our washer and the washer flooded our upstairs, and had to hire a company to get rid of a bunch of pigeons that had taken residence on our roof. I recommend setting aside some house funds to cover the seemingly yearly expenses that pop up unexpectedly.
@kayemjay2 I would also try to match the hallway. The nice thing is its a neutral color, you can always put a different color area rug in the kid rooms to protect the carpeting and add a design touch.
@emilyalso - Thanks! The hall carpeting extends to a loft area as well as the stairs, so I feel like we'd have to replace a lot more square footage if we went that route. The downstairs is also carpeted a different color than the stairs, but I think we've agreed to leave that as is for now. I just don't understand what these people were thinking.
Fur daughter: 02/2011 Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017 *formerly kayemjay*
@kayemjay2 I don't personally think there's anything weird about bedrooms not matching hall carpet. So, if you did go the carpet route, I think you could do something different, but I'd stick within the same color palette as you're planning for the house as a whole.
Hugs and love to everyone going through a pet loss and everyone having a hard time right now. I'll be thinking of you.
One other thing to consider about home ownership, we seem to encounter a $1k-3k expense/disaster once a year. My house is only 10 years old. So far we've: replaced the A/C, had pool issues, broken a very large, expensive patio door w/ a rock thrown from the weed whacker, paid the insurance deductible after a $13 dollar part broke on our washer and the washer flooded our upstairs, and had to hire a company to get rid of a bunch of pigeons that had taken residence on our roof. I recommend setting aside some house funds to cover the seemingly yearly expenses that pop up unexpectedly.
All of this. Our last house was 50 years old. Some of our fun suprised were:
- Discovering that we had no insulation around any of our windows (which happened because we couldn't figure out how so many bugs were getting into our house).
- starting to replace our shingles and finding out the whole roof was rotting so that doubled our cost to fix
- losing the prime to our well which helped us discover that the pump was broken
That's not to say only older houses are bad. Our current house is only 10 years old and we've already had to fix a massive leak in our hot tub (5 years old), and re-insulate the garage (ETA: we've been here 3 months). Fortunately, DH is super handy so doing a lot of home repairs ourselves has saved us thousands over the years. But I would agree with @NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot with having a few thousand put aside for the surprises. Especially if you would have to hire people to do the repairs for you.
Re: Randoms and Questions 1.30 - 2.5
Big hugs to all those who had a crappy moment or day or shit things happening to them. I hope the rest of the week look up from here on. Also happy belated bday to @Jen_Shoes, I hope you treated yourself!
I will try to chime in more later this week when/if I get my computer set up. Otherwise I'll be around lurking or participating on the smaller threads
@mrsrep123 so incredibly sorry for your sudden loss. Sending healing vibes your way, and to all those who had a rough start to the week.
Home buying was the best decision we ever made. After renting for years and moving often, we really needed to feel settled in a space of our own. We made a list of our requirements (bed/bathrooms, yard size, proximity to work, nearby amenities, etc), and then hunted for a long time until we found the right spot. My best advice while searching is that you can't get too emotionally invested in a place that you're not able to walk away if negotiations aren't working out. There are lots of houses out there, and you'll find the right one for your family.
Today was a high-low day here: it's my birthday so we visited Seattle and explored some of the coolest places, had a great adventure, and even got free dessert (highs); but it was super cold, I had a super cranky toddler who refused to nap at all, and my wife was combative for no real reason (lows). Thankfully, I've gotten good at protecting my own experience emotionally, but it was a challenge today, and selfishly I didn't want to deal with any bullshit on my birthday. Fingers crossed tomorrow will be a better day.
Also, I'll have to pick your brain for the cool places you visited today! We have a Washington Bucket List going while we are here!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@chailife34: happy belated! It sounds like you had a great time despite the lows. Sending you good vibes for a nice day today!
@mrsrep123, I'm so sorry about your dog. You've talked about your dogs before and I could tell they're a huge part of your family. Hang in there.
@chailife34, happy birthday! Seattle sounds like a great place to visit.
Random: I decided to give up sugar for the month of February except in fruits, veggies, and grains (I'm not cutting out rice and bread completely, that's nuts). I like doing little challenges for myself, and after watching that Fed Up documentary, I really wanted to try to limit my sugar intake. Anyways, I'm sitting here eating my oatmeal with only cinnamon and no sugar and it's kind of the worst. Haha hopefully by the end of the month, my taste buds have gotten used to it. I'll also load up on fruit so that I at least have something sweet around.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@mrsrep123 so sorry about your dog!
@chailife34 happy belated birthday!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
As far as home ownership goes that is a tough one. We love having our home and it would be tough to rent a home like the one we have in our area. That being said, I am the most handy one at home and I'm not super handy. I get frustrated bc when something breaks DH always wants to call a repair person instead of trying to figure it out. You tube has been my friend to fix several things and now that my dad is retired he helps us by showing us/teaching us how to do things if he is able to make the trip up.
Other home buying advice: Be sure to look into things like property taxes and HOA fees as PPs have mentioned. Those can really get you. The most important thing I've learned (I've bought and sold 3 houses now) is that getting emotionally tied to a house while shopping is a terrible thing. Always be prepared to walk away. There are no perfect houses and red flags shouldn't be over looked just because you "love" a certain house. If you don't have the budget for a renovation don't go buying a fixer upper just because you love it. It will drown you. If the heating needs replaced and the roof and the electric don't over look that either. You WILL find another house you love just as much!
@chailife34 happy Birthday!
@mrsrep123 so sorry about your fur baby
As far as home owning goes I love it. I am pretty lucky that DH is super handy and actually works in home remodel/repair. With that in mind we bought a total fixer upper for dirt cheap because I loved the yard and the location. DH literally rebuilt the entire house in 4 months. If he were not such a handyman, I can imagine it would be a bit more stressful. Another thing to consider obviously is school district and property taxes/HOAs like pp have mentioned.
11.2011 - DS1
02.2013 - loss at 6 wks
06.2014 - DS2
10.2015 - loss at 12 wks
03.2017 - DD
The good: I passed my 1 hr glucose test.
The bad: I feel like I am drowning in school the last couple of days with a constant WTH was I thinking going to school full time this pregnant. Anyways, it's been kicking my ass big time.
The ugly: kids have a tummy bug and after this week, we will be needing to steam clean the carpet in the playroom..... gross!
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
@pshaortao congrats on the move! kind of jealous, I loooove setting up a new home.
@chailife34 happy birthday!!!!
My daycare seems to change my DS who is about 1.5 usually 4-5x in about 8 hours. Way more than I change him at home but he is always nice and dry. We just send a large sleeve of diapers and they let me know when they are running low.
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
I'm home sick today after being up basically all night with extreme heart burn and indigestion. I feel like complete crap and just wanted to complain, lol...bumping on mobile so I know there were more of you I wanted to reply to, but it's not happening. Maybe I'll get the motivation to drag out the laptop later...
When we were house-hunting, we found this great house right in the center of this cute idyllic New England town. So nice. Met all of our criteria. We got into conversations with the listing agent and everything. Then we looked closer at the details. Property taxes were $6,000 a year, which is an extra $500 a month that we didn't have (and! it didn't include school taxes or garbage pick-up or any other town services!), so we had to walk away. Tough lesson to learn, but it helped us make smarter decisions. You have to look at all the taxes, services, and homeowners insurance amounts you'd pay for any one particular property.
You know how people will say there always seems to be a wave of boys then girls? Well I'm curious if our current group swings more one way than the other.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
@chickyclg Hang in there, with school and the kiddos!
@pshaortao Congrats on your move!
I'm sure I'm missing lots of others. Sorry!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I literally cannot fit into anything nonmaternity, so now I have two wardrobes. I do not have room for two wardrobes. There are clothes everywhere, in piles, and it's terrible.
Ideas?
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
So, my question for those of you with decorating skills/good taste is: Would it be weird to just re-carpet those 2 rooms, without re-carpeting the hallway? If not, should we try to match the hallway carpet, or do you think white/beige is unwise for kids' room carpeting? We'd also consider a wood laminate with area rugs- any thoughts on that vs. carpet?
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
I used an under-the-bed tote for some, a random shelf for others, and put a full box in the attic (mostly winter stuff that I won't wear again soon anyway). Also started a bag of donation clothes. Now my wardrobe/closet is full of only those things that fit me now; like, all I see is stuff that fits, and I can reach in and grab anything and be happy about it. No more being disappointed & shuffling piles of shirts around.
Do you have any place you can stash clothes for 6 months?
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
One other thing to consider about home ownership, we seem to encounter a $1k-3k expense/disaster once a year. My house is only 10 years old. So far we've: replaced the A/C, had pool issues, broken a very large, expensive patio door w/ a rock thrown from the weed whacker, paid the insurance deductible after a $13 dollar part broke on our washer and the washer flooded our upstairs, and had to hire a company to get rid of a bunch of pigeons that had taken residence on our roof. I recommend setting aside some house funds to cover the seemingly yearly expenses that pop up unexpectedly.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
11.2011 - DS1
02.2013 - loss at 6 wks
06.2014 - DS2
10.2015 - loss at 12 wks
03.2017 - DD
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
@kayemjay2 I don't personally think there's anything weird about bedrooms not matching hall carpet. So, if you did go the carpet route, I think you could do something different, but I'd stick within the same color palette as you're planning for the house as a whole.
- Discovering that we had no insulation around any of our windows (which happened because we couldn't figure out how so many bugs were getting into our house).
- starting to replace our shingles and finding out the whole roof was rotting so that doubled our cost to fix
- losing the prime to our well which helped us discover that the pump was broken
That's not to say only older houses are bad. Our current house is only 10 years old and we've already had to fix a massive leak in our hot tub (5 years old), and re-insulate the garage (ETA: we've been here 3 months). Fortunately, DH is super handy so doing a lot of home repairs ourselves has saved us thousands over the years. But I would agree with @NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot with having a few thousand put aside for the surprises. Especially if you would have to hire people to do the repairs for you.