I'll jump on the chiropractic train. I've been seeing one weekly since 25 weeks or so. She adjusts my back while I lay on pregnancy pillows and then she does my neck while I lay on my back or sit in a chair. The first appointment was longer because she did a full body assessment, but now they're about 10 minutes. It has completely eliminated my SI pain, and I could barely walk when I went to see her. It's been amazing.
So I have a coworker that had her baby a few days after Mother's Day. I just saw her a couple days ago and asked how she was doing and if it was all worth it. She said, "Honestly, no! Labor sucked, recovery sucked, and now I just have to take care of it." OMG I didn't even know what to say!
It took me 3.5 years before I considered every having more children. I did not forget labor. I still have not forgotten labor and it's been over 6 years. I liked the part where you "have to take care of it" though. Hence my current condition.
In all honesty, she's probably tired and speaking the god's honest truth. It DID suck and it IS overwhelming.....at times. And then other times it's the best thing you could ever have done. We will all feel a wide spectrum of emotions. Don't worry too much about it.
Back right away with randomness this morning. My boss wants to sit with me at my desk to know how to split my duties while I am gone on maternity leave. As her assistant it really just depends on what she & the company has going on! How am I supposed to shop online & keep up on my bumping with her sitting here?
As I'm sitting here waiting for my ob appointment, a couple comes out with a smile from ear to ear staring at their ultrasound pictures. (From the way I hear her talking this is probably her first appointment) their excitement makes me so happy I could cry.
@stellaluna14 I think I've heard my SIL's "horrible" L+D story about 8 times. She ended up with an unplanned C-section due to the baby being breech (doctors think she turned during labor), but it certainly wasn't life or death emergency. It's annoying and every time she starts talking about it my MIL interrupts her and tells her to shut up. I know people just want to connect and I think a lot of times they forget how they were feeling prior to labor. But still, STFU.
@nikkimarie159 aw I love that! A couple weeks ago at mine a woman came out by herself with her ultrasound pix. She was talking on the phone and got all teary and said "we're having a little girl!" Of course the whole office of women went "aww!" Turns out her hubby was deployed and it was him on the phone which only made us all more teary. Very sweet.
@nikkimarie159 I remember at my first appointment there was a woman there who was pretty far along, she just looked so over it haha! When I was in for my last appointment there was a couple and it must have been their 1st appointment (she was doing the intake paperwork). As I was sitting there I realized it was a complete role reversal as I was now the woman looking totally over it. Circle of life and all that.
@megstervt hahaha haha that's great! I'm sure if I was a couple more weeks along then I'd be looking like I'm over it, too! Although I may not look it yet, I sure as hell feel it!
So I have a coworker that had her baby a few days after Mother's Day. I just saw her a couple days ago and asked how she was doing and if it was all worth it. She said, "Honestly, no! Labor sucked, recovery sucked, and now I just have to take care of it." OMG I didn't even know what to say!
I think I'm just having a hormonal tired day that's making my thoughts cloudy. However, since we found out we're having a boy I've been thinking a lot about how to raise him to be a good person, respect himself, respect his romantic partners, etc etc. This whole Brock Turner case has me thinking about it obsessively. How do I make sure I raise my son to not ever think actions like that are OK? How do I raise him to be like the Swedes who discovered what he was doing to the victim? That whole case makes me so sad and angry and I wish there was a way to ensure my child would be part of the solution and not ever be part of the problem.
@megstervt when I found out I was having a boy when pregnant with DS1 I cried for this same reason. I've been hurt by men in the past and I worried about having a son who might go on to someday hurt another woman. As the soon-to-be mother of two sons, I now view it as part of my parental responsibility to instill good values in them and teach them how to respect others, especially women. I think what's really important is that if/when our sons mess up, that we condemn those actions, teach them that they must accept the consequences of those actions (no matter how severe), and not enable our children or diminish the severity of their actions in any way when they do things that are WRONG, unlike what Brock Turner's father did...
The Brock turner case has been on my mind too. A friend posted an article about this on fb and said "marry the man you want to raise your son to be". That gave me a sense of relief because my husband totally agrees that these are topics we (both mom and dad) need to discuss with our son. I know my dad had several talks with my brother about respecting women and standing up for women in these types of situations especially around the time he went away to college. I'm glad that my son will have three strong male role models who will lead by example and not be afraid to have these tough conversations with him. I think as a mother I need to make sure to hold him accountable for his actions and not make him a victim like Turner's father is doing.
@CarbAddict I've seen a chiro since January for sciatica pain. Just as others said, they use a table which you will face down on, with the middle raised up. Even when the middle is dropped when the dr does the adjustments, your stomach will never touch the table. Because of the pain and the area mine is in, my dr also uses an impact machine (it's like something that hits the spot over and over again) - not the most comfortable thing in the world, but it helps me. Everytime I go, when I get up from the table I notice a big difference.
I think the biggest part of raising a son who will treat women we'll is to not give him an entitled attitude to start with - did you see Brock's father's statement? Disgusting. I'm having a boy too, and honestly it didn't even occur to me to worry about how he'll treat women because his dad is amazing. We've only been dating for about a year, but we've been friends since we were 13 and he's always been kind and respectful. I didn't even want kids when I was with my ex because deep down I knew he was a piece of crap who couldn't be a good father. I'm so grateful that this is the man who's going to help me raise a son.
@eymi My mother always advised me that the best gift you could give your children is a good father. I spent most of my early 20's saying I never wanted kids, and looking back I realize it's because I didn't want kids with the men I was with back then.
I think it's really important to think about how we define 'what makes a man'. Is it the popular masculine ideal of a stoic, strong, sometimes violent and always hyper sexualized buff guy? Is it the guy who never cries or talks about his feelings? Is it the guy who sticks up for people who can't stick up for themselves? Should we only hold the door for women (implying that they are weak and incapable), or do we hold the door for anyone because that's how you treat other humans? Do you not hit a girl because they are the weaker sex or do you not hit anyone (unless needed to protect yourself and others) because violence is wrong? It's all the little nuances in how we explain societal norms that teach our children that boys and girls are different, and in some way societally ranked. It's hard because so much of it has to do with retraining how we perceive those societal norms.
I really love the attitude all you moms having boys have! It makes me a little less nervous to raise a girl when I know there will still be kickass boys out there raised by kickass parents.
Is anyone doing anything for their SO for father's day? DH got me a little box of chocolates for mother's day because he said "the baby told him she wanted to get them for me" so I feel like I should get him a little something.
A lot of this Brock Turner bullshit has been weighing on me too. I do think though its only helped me feel more passionate about the kind of son I plan on raising and that helps. @schaze for father's day I got hubby a new duffle for his hospital bag. Not very exciting but he needed/wanted one. It's more bizarre to think that he will be a father to a child outside my stomach come father's day!
@schaze I'm getting DH board books that are about fathers (plus a splurge gift because obvi won't splurge on each other again for a long time with LO to splurge on!). I like the look of Ten, Nine, Eight, Mister Seahorse, Papa Please Get the Moon for Me, and Baby Dance.
@eymi My mother always advised me that the best gift you could give your children is a good father. I spent most of my early 20's saying I never wanted kids, and looking back I realize it's because I didn't want kids with the men I was with back then.
I think it's really important to think about how we define 'what makes a man'. Is it the popular masculine ideal of a stoic, strong, sometimes violent and always hyper sexualized buff guy? Is it the guy who never cries or talks about his feelings? Is it the guy who sticks up for people who can't stick up for themselves? Should we only hold the door for women (implying that they are weak and incapable), or do we hold the door for anyone because that's how you treat other humans? Do you not hit a girl because they are the weaker sex or do you not hit anyone (unless needed to protect yourself and others) because violence is wrong? It's all the little nuances in how we explain societal norms that teach our children that boys and girls are different, and in some way societally ranked. It's hard because so much of it has to do with retraining how we perceive those societal norms.
@megstervt it's scary to think about the responsibility of raising a boy in our society, but from the moment I found out we were having a boy I have been excited for that opportunity. Don't get me wrong, it's terrifying, but I can't wait to teach my son about intersectional feminism and about healthy relationships and boundaries. I feel a lot less afraid because my husband and I share the same views and values and I know he will be the kind of role model I want my son looking up to.
I am so easily angered today. I am so sick of having small talk with strangers about this baby. I got on the elevator with a coworker and she was asking me about how big I think this baby will be and I was telling her about my son being early, what his weight was and blah blah. When the elevator stopped on the next floor, we were talking about how big my husband was (he was 10 pounds) and the cleaning lady gets on and just butts directly into our conversation. "OH IT'S GONNA HURT, TOO!" And I looked at her and said, "this isn't my first baby..I know." And she just kept going. SHUT THE HELL UP PEOPLE. LEAVE ME ALOOOOONE.
@HenchBytch yep, so over the small talk. I know people mean well but every time someone asks me "are you getting excited?" or anything of that nature, it takes everything in me to not roll my eyes so hard...
@HenchBytch yep, so over the small talk. I know people mean well but every time someone asks me "are you getting excited?" or anything of that nature, it takes everything in me to not roll my eyes so hard...
YES. I know they mean well but my GOD..how many times do I have to answer the question, "how much longer?" I need to come up with ridiculous responses just to refrain from being mean but entertain myself at the same time.
Thanks everyone, I liked reading all your thoughts and perspectives. My husband is a great man and will be a great role model along with his dad and my dad. I'm confident my son will have positive role models around him which isn't something I could say in past relationships like many of you. It's daunting to think about the responsibility of raising this tiny person to not only just not be a shit head, but to be a genuinely good person with the character we hope for him.
I am hypnotized by the flashing glasses of @HenchBytch that even show in the mini icon when love titing a post *insert meme of the Jungle Book snake here
I am hypnotized by the flashing glasses of @HenchBytch that even show in the mini icon when love titing a post *insert meme of the Jungle Book snake here
I am hypnotized by the flashing glasses of @HenchBytch that even show in the mini icon when love titing a post *insert meme of the Jungle Book snake here
It's a gif! You can do it, too.
I honestly hadn't realized you could have a gif avatar until you did it, @HenchBytch. Small points for TB there.
Omg yes! The "are you excited?" I can't tell you how many times I hear that in a day. Or "Are you nervous?" And the "Are you ready?" Like why?!
Stuck in the box! Stupid app. All of this!! Hub and I both despise this question, we are not outwardly "excitable" people and every time someone asks and we say yes they come back with 'well you sure don't seem like it!'. What the eff do you want, jumping up and down? Hysterical screaming? Uncontrollable crying? Of course we are excited and you can shove it up your judgmental ass if you think I care about your opinion of whether or not I seem excited enough. Rage!
@erin7264 same! I'm not a very outwardly excited person so anytime someone asks it's so uncomfortable to plaster on a huge smile FOR THEM and go "yessss!" cause you know anything less than that would warrant MORE comments
So I totally just lost it on my mom over the phone. I just had a great doctors visit and my doc commented on how well I've done with my weight etc. I ordered a slice of pie while ordering food and she said "that's why you're getting fat." I completely lost my shit. Everyone else is always so complimentary but her. She's so judgmental and has no regard for my feelings at all. But she wonders why I want her 1000+ miles away when I deliver this baby. Sorry for the rant. I needed to vent.
My first labor was hell. I ended up in an urgent C/S, and she almost died. It was horrible, but to be very honest.... it was my fault because I refused the C/S earlier.
My 2nd C/S was AWESOME-SAUCE. seriously. It was this amazing, happy and touching experience. I bonded with rotten child #2 right away. I look back on it and smile. I am seriously praying that this C/S will be a fraction of what my second one was. I have even asked my friend to do my anesthesia again. She told me how to request her. I am literally hand-picking my OR team, and I could not be more excited. I am not nervous, and I will be happy to tell every one how great it was. How little bleeding I had. How I was walking in a few hours. Hell, I moved my self from the stretcher to the bed! I had my first PP poop while IN the hospital (that was a surprise). Rotten child nurses in Recovery. How amazing the PP staff were. I was treated so well.... it was just lovely. All of it.
@rakel88 Fake a smile for NO ONE!!! Everyone who asks me about this pregnancy gets the same response "I'm over it! SO over it!" And all labor questions get the same response "Fear is the mindkiller. Bring it!"
@Heathereaddy WTAF?! Yeah eat your pie- tell your mom to shove it and that if she keeps it up she'll be learning about her grandchild via FB with the rest of the world...
Re: Week of 6/6 Randoms
It took me 3.5 years before I considered every having more children. I did not forget labor. I still have not forgotten labor and it's been over 6 years. I liked the part where you "have to take care of it" though. Hence my current condition.
In all honesty, she's probably tired and speaking the god's honest truth. It DID suck and it IS overwhelming.....at times. And then other times it's the best thing you could ever have done. We will all feel a wide spectrum of emotions. Don't worry too much about it.
Back right away with randomness this morning.
My boss wants to sit with me at my desk to know how to split my duties while I am gone on maternity leave. As her assistant it really just depends on what she & the company has going on! How am I supposed to shop online & keep up on my bumping with her sitting here?
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
July16 JULY siggy challenge
I'm having a girl - but I loved this article when I saw it
https://abcnews.go.com/Lifestyle/year-boy-treats-mom-dinner-date-month-allowance/story?id=36084025
Married March 2016
DD: born 7.22.16
DS EDD: 6.23.18
Good luck at your appointment!
I think it's really important to think about how we define 'what makes a man'. Is it the popular masculine ideal of a stoic, strong, sometimes violent and always hyper sexualized buff guy? Is it the guy who never cries or talks about his feelings? Is it the guy who sticks up for people who can't stick up for themselves? Should we only hold the door for women (implying that they are weak and incapable), or do we hold the door for anyone because that's how you treat other humans? Do you not hit a girl because they are the weaker sex or do you not hit anyone (unless needed to protect yourself and others) because violence is wrong? It's all the little nuances in how we explain societal norms that teach our children that boys and girls are different, and in some way societally ranked. It's hard because so much of it has to do with retraining how we perceive those societal norms.
Is anyone doing anything for their SO for father's day? DH got me a little box of chocolates for mother's day because he said "the baby told him she wanted to get them for me" so I feel like I should get him a little something.
@schaze for father's day I got hubby a new duffle for his hospital bag. Not very exciting but he needed/wanted one. It's more bizarre to think that he will be a father to a child outside my stomach come father's day!
edited because the bump ate half my post!
Married: October 2014
TTC #1 since September 2015
My 2nd C/S was AWESOME-SAUCE. seriously. It was this amazing, happy and touching experience. I bonded with rotten child #2 right away. I look back on it and smile. I am seriously praying that this C/S will be a fraction of what my second one was. I have even asked my friend to do my anesthesia again. She told me how to request her. I am literally hand-picking my OR team, and I could not be more excited. I am not nervous, and I will be happy to tell every one how great it was. How little bleeding I had. How I was walking in a few hours. Hell, I moved my self from the stretcher to the bed! I had my first PP poop while IN the hospital (that was a surprise). Rotten child nurses in Recovery. How amazing the PP staff were. I was treated so well.... it was just lovely. All of it.
@Heathereaddy WTAF?! Yeah eat your pie- tell your mom to shove it and that if she keeps it up she'll be learning about her grandchild via FB with the rest of the world...