April 2022 Moms

The Great Big Question Thread


Re: The Great Big Question Thread

  • Options
    Hi mama’s! I apologize if I didn’t post this in the correct place… but help! I’m a TTM. My previous pregnancies I did not get an hcg blood draw but my office switched things up this time and tested me at 5 weeks. According to the results the normal range at 5 weeks is somewhere between 215-7138 but mine were 27,686. What does this mean?! I know when I got pregnant because we were TTC. Help!!
  • Options
    @jessicaschafer8 HCG ranges are super broad and don't really mean much. What matters is doubling time within 48 hours. You could just have your dates wrong, etc. 
  • Loading the player...
  • Options
    @jessicaschafer8   try not to worry over those numbers.  I've had TONS of HCG testing done and the numbers can really be all over the place.  All that matters is what happens over 48hrs, and my doc has said even that is more variable than they advertise as it really changes depending on how far along you are. 
  • Options
    @jessicaschafer8 other ladies here will know more, but I just did a quick Google search and your levels are smack dab in the middle of normal for 6 weeks pregnant, which I think is a good sign that it’s only a few days different from what you expected. ** hugs ** I know these early weeks are so stressful when we all have so little information.
  • Options
    @BumpAdmin can you PLEASE sticky this thread? 
  • Options
    @kiwi2628 maybe they're not stickying anything anymore because March has almost nothing stickied too
  • Options
    @doxiemoxie212 god I hate this app like 70% of the time
  • Options
    @kiwi2628 this app is terrible for me all the time lol. I thought maybe it was just my phone. Apparently not! 
  • Options
    Yeah I was shocked that LITERALLY nothing had changed in 5 years since I’ve been on here. It had the same glitches then, you would think they would have fixed them by now. 
    IAmPregnant Ticker
  • Options
    I’m curious how everyone feels about what I’ll call controversial safety risks during pregnancy: cold deli meat, hair coloring, continuing strength training of lifting heavy (>80 lbs), scooping cat litter box, public gatherings (covid), lots o’coffee, light alcohol, warm to hot bubble baths.

    Which ones did I forget?

    For me: yes to cold deli meat, hair coloring, heavy lifting, scooping cat box (I wash my hands. Doesn’t everyone wash their hands after scooping the litter box?!), up to 2 cups of coffee per day (my usual pre-preg), and half-filled hot baths so at least my butt and feet get warm. No to alcohol and public indoor gatherings, even though I’m fully vaccinated.

    I also say yes to whatever my OB says is ok, but I’m defying her on the cat box. My cat is a fully indoor potato, he never gets out, and toxoplasmosis is so rare… I’m open to being schooled on that, especially since I know there are a few veterinarians in the house.
  • Options
    @loveanddatadriven Have you read Expecting Better? I found the research to be really interesting compared to what is just told to us to avoid/do. 

    For me, yes to: hair coloring, most sushi (avoiding high mercury fish), up to 200 mg of caffeine, warm baths (but not hot tubs), moderate lifting, regular exercise 

    No to: alcohol, cannabis, cold deli meat, high mercury fish like tuna, litter box (only because I don’t have a cat haha) 

    Indoor gatherings will vary for me based on perceived COVID risk (i.e., how many people, whether they are vaccinated, whether they tend to be responsible with COVID risk factors, etc) 
  • Options
    add runny eggs! I remember learning that and totally losing it, since it was the only thing I could keep down! I mostly follow my ob and midwives.  They are pretty chill and come from the side of, we are literally, evolutionarily, designed for this.  If everything was dangerous we wouldn't have made it this far...but don't be dumb and tempt fate too often. She also points out that the most (not all) of the things that are really bad our bodies will show us, by giving us pain or just plain making us puke. I really appreciate that, because between my 15yr old and my 15mo old, I swear they added so many rules!  I was totally overwhelmed with all I "couldn't" do according to the books, and they helped make me more reasonable.  That being said, I am also a major worrier, so certain things Im too afraid of.  1) super hot baths (which stinks!!!!  It's literally my favorite thing) but I take pretty warm baths and just use a water thermometer to make sure I don't go too high.  2) alcohol.  I KNOW other countries think it's totally fine to have a tiny bit, but I'm just too paranoid.  3) pretty much all meds, unless doc specifically says it's ok.  
    And now, with covid, we are crazy careful.  We are fully vaccinated so I feel safe myself, but I have a 2 kids I could bring it home to, one of which has severe asthma and some immune issues. 

    My husband, however, would prefer I was in a bubble for 9 months 🤦  So yeah, we're all different. 
  • Options
    @monstera13 I'll have to read that book! 

    @loveanddatadriven for me I will take a warm bath, also use a thermometer to make sure it's not too hot because I love hot baths. I will strengthen train.

    I won't eat cold deli meat or raw eggs. I don't drink caffeine anyway so that's on the no list but if I do drink it I'm fine with a cup. I don't die my hair but wouldn't even if I did. I don't use nail polish while pregnant. Public places it depends on the situation. I tend to be on the safe side because I do have a toddler at home, even though I am vaccinated. 
  • Options
    I try to be relaxed about everything, even though I do worry. A lot of my behavior during pregnancy is the same as my behavior before: I eat mostly whatever I want to eat, like deli meats and raw sushi (although I definitely limit my ahi to maybe a small bite once in a blue moon), exercise stays the same although my goals are different  (lifting if it’s in the workout but nothing towards a PR, just for muscle maintenance), warm/hot baths, coffee because I drank it before and literally need it to stay upright most days… I don’t drink alcohol but I may have a sip at Christmas or New Year’s. I think so much is over-thinking and makes us miserable, and most of our pregnancy habits should just be common sense. I’m not eating sushi that’s been sitting in the window of the 7/11 or a ham sandwich I left in my car for six hours. I’m not sitting in a hot tub for an hour. 

    One thing I am weird about is essential oils and teas. I’m more careful with the oils I use topically and I don’t ingest them anymore. I wear gloves when I scoop the kitty box. I’m fully vaxxed but am due for my booster so I am more wary of being around other people. Work is a little scary, as an in-patient nurse. I wash my hands 2917394018 times a day. 
  • Options
    I'll eat cold deli meats, get nails done or hair dyed if it's a clean place and well ventilated. I don't like sushi so that's easy. I don't have a cat but I would use pregnancy as an excuse to not have to scoop the poop lol. Exercise I follow the standard of whatever your body is already used to is fine to keep up until your body tells you otherwise.

    With gatherings I'm still iffy. I'm fully vaccinated but with delta going through kids so much right now I'm worried my 2 year old will suffer through it. Plus, I still feel like crap from being pregnant, I don't want to add even a couple days of a bad cold on top of that.

  • Options
    I don't have a cat anymore but scooped for all three previous pregnancies bc my H would not. I eat cured meat( bacon, ham) occasionally so there are some nitrates. I eat OM eggs so sometimes whites are runny if I go somewhere that's not great at cooking them. I have a small amount of highlights currently that I still do, and when I googled to double check I thought I saw it was mostly fine now. I DEFINITELY drink coffee, but for most of the first tri I can't stomach a lot of it. I probably don't hit the two cup limit and most days it's my only caffeine.  Maybe that's part of what @todzillamom was saying...my body is just not letting me overdo it. After first tri I def hit the two cups/200mg limit. 
  • Options
    The catbox / toxo thing is definitely oversimplified by so many sources! A lot of human practitioners and sources recommending women don't scoop the box (or get rid of their cats entirely!! - have had many clients come to me upset about this) don't seem to have a great grasp on the toxo life cycle.
    An indoor only cat that you've had for more than 3-4 weeks (longest reported duration of shedding parasite eggs after a cat has been infected) probably poses zero risk unless they are an occasional escape artist (risk is also pretty low for these - healthy adult cats are pretty low risk for significant shedding even if infected). Also the eggs take 24hrs plus after coming out of the cat to reach the stage where they can infect another creature, so cleaning the box at least daily (and definitely washing hands after as prev suggested!!) also significantly minimizes risk. 
    People are probably at much greater risk for toxo from gardening, sitting on a public beach, eating unwashed fruits/veggies or any other ways you can come in contact with soil/sand where stray cats may roam. 
    I've come in contact with a lot of sick cats and kittens, many who likely have had toxo, and my antibody titers are still negative (get them tested every time I get pregnant mostly out of curiosity and because it would be one less thing to worry about). 
    So wash your hands after cleaning your litterbox daily (and after anything else), maybe don't foster a new sick kitten or cat, wear gardening gloves, wash produce and you'll be fine. 
    *Climbs off soapbox* 😂
    Aside - I still try to get DH to do the box when I'm pregnant, but only because the smells make me gag!
  • Options
    I went out in a blaze of glory the night before I found out I was pregnant. Tuna Sushi and some Of my favorite red wine. We didn't think it was possible to get pregnant for a few more months after the vasectomy reversal. Now I'm being a model pregnant person.  No wine or sushi. If craving it I'd have a cooked sushi or veggie roll. Husband is on cat litter but if I needed to I'd just wear gloves and of course still wash. So if I eat deli meat, I toast it in the oven doesn't take long. I buy the nitrate free bacon and sausage it's a little more expensive but not terribly so. No hair dye. This time I'm coffee free which surprised me because I needed a cup a day last time and now I'm decaf or nothing for 3 weeks so I'm going to just roll with that until my body demands caffeine again. I have to see people one on one for 30 min masked in my office up to 16 a day so I feel I get plenty of exposure for vaccinated me and my 5 year old right there.  I'm probably crazy but we go to the public places at the weirdest times like Sunday morning early when everyone is at church or Friday night grocery shopping when it's just  like me and the food stockers. The hot baths and exercise is an interesting one for me because I just basically become heat intolerant. I love to go walking but it's 90 degrees and like 80% humidity. I'm not capable of walking an hour in this like I usually do or I feel sick.ill walk again in the end of October when I'm not miserable from heat and all day morning sickness. 
  • Options
    @monstera13 I love Expecting Better! I love Oster’s explanation that our decisions are a combo of our values and the data, so we can make different smart decisions even with the same data.

    @todzillamom @SmashJam @rbflei You’re right about what the body can handle during first tri. Nearly everything on my yes list is a moot point for first tri because I can’t tolerate them right now anyway.

    @todzillamom I love undercooked eggs, too! This pregnancy I might partake on a special occasion if I cook them at home where I can double check at least everything else is clean.

    @jennykatedvm Yes! Thank you! I was mostly annoyed at my OB for harping on the litter box and literally not even mentioning gardening. 

    @robbenson I would love to use pregnancy as an excuse to not scoop! Poor H is allergic, and it’s such a bad chore for him.

    @rbflei @aloha_mama I miss ahi… I forgot about tuna. When I start eating again, I’m definitely going to look into the new canned tuna where they test every fish for mercury. It’s not the same as a seared ahi tuna steak, though. 😣
  • Options
    I don’t have any extra knowledge about anything here, but I will say my doctor really only mentions the cat litter thing. When I asked her about the deli meat thing she said the vegetables are probably more risky than the meat. Thought that was a good point. Also last time I got my hair colored probably every 8 weeks the whole time and never thought twice about it. I do hair, and it was never a concern in my training, so I think that’s kind of an odd one on the list. I think the risk may be if you’re doing it at home without proper ventilation? Or just antiquated referring back to the really strong chemicals of yesteryear? I don’t color my hair anymore and let my grays run wild, but I don’t think I’d think twice if I did.

    Also @dinomeetsjedi I totally have had those same thoughts before. How unfair it is that some people sneeze and get pregnant and never take care of themselves, while others try to do everything right and struggle. 
    IAmPregnant Ticker
  • Options
    I do all the risky things because it’s all about weighing the risk/reward and relative risk and moderation. I eat deli meat because while deli meat can carry listeria, so can leafy greens and no one ever told a pregnant person not to eat a salad. I eat sushi- Japanese people do it, but I’m a snob and only eat stupidly expensive very fresh sushi anyway. I would never eat like grocery store sushi or something, and even most sushi restaurants I don’t find up to scrap. I drink the occasional glass of red wine once I hit mid second trimester (I’ve actually had two sips first tri of really fantastic wine, no shame or worries). 

    I don’t drink coffee but that’s only because I don’t do that when not pregnant either- coffee is gross. And I don’t scoop the litter box not because of toxo (jennykate did a great expaination) but simply because I don’t want to so I told my husband about toxo and now he has to do it. 
  • Options
    So I don’t do any of the “risky” things, but I also don’t have a cat, don’t like raw sushi/undercooked eggs, am more of a shower person and very rarely eat deli meat regularly. As for coffee I usually keep it to one cup anyway. I can’t tolerate more than a sip at this point in pregnancy. 
    My thinking is I went through so much to get to this point I’m not going to do something that is not recommended. 
    Also, I work in an OB clinic and I’ve seen a lot and like others have said there are so many things that can happen and go wrong even if you do everything “right” for me I’m just too anxious. 
    But I do already miss red wine. 

    TTC#1 10/2016
    TTC/IF:included medicated cycles, IUIs and 2 rounds of IVF with 1 embryo each. 
    BFP finally in 12/2018

    TTC#2 06/2021
    planning FET

    "Some days are diamonds, some days are rocks,
    some doors are open, some roads are blocked" 

  • Options
    I love all these perspectives! And I really appreciate that everyone can have their own feelings about what is safe for them without any shaming of other people's feelings.  Thank you guys! 
  • Options
    @loveanddatadriven Agreed about her point about the values! And I appreciate being able to understand the actual data so that I can choose based on that plus my values, rather than what others tell me to do. 

    @dinomeetsjedi I think that’s an interesting point! I see similar working with severely mentally ill/justice involved individuals. 
  • Options
    With my first pregnancy, I followed all the rules. For this one, I'm still eating sushi, deli meat, and over medium eggs (white cooked, yellow a little runny). I quit marijuana just because I don't feel it's worth the risk. Not dying my hair because pregnancy hormones push the dye out quicker and it doesn't want to stay, so not worth the cost. (I figured that one out with the last pregnancy.) I only quit having my morning cup of coffee because it exasperated my nausea. Now that I'm caffeine free, I don't necessarily miss it. I'd still be down to have an iced coffee in the afternoon if I wanted one though. And I don't think I would have an entire glass of red wine, but if we were out to dinner I would probably have a sip or two of my husband's. 
  • Options
    @dinomeetsjedi I'd actually say how unfair it is that our society abandons people enough that they're forced into lives of desperation and addiction with limited treatment options to the point that they no longer have autonomy over their bodies and are giving birth in prison? At least there are some pilot programs to keep babies with their moms in prison now. 
  • Options
    As for "risky" behavior, I don't eat most of the risky stuff to begin with so it's kind of a non-issue, but I took hotter baths than I guess I was supposed to with DD because it was one of the only things that helped with my excruciating pain. I can't eat eggs much this time since DD is allergic, but I'm fine with them being runny. I wanted to have a glass of wine every once in a while in third trimester with DD, but a few sips would give me terrible heartburn so I couldn't lol. 
  • Options
    Ah, yes, risky things!! So generally here I’m a proponent of moderation. As mentioned previously I think there’s a lot outside of our control here, for better or for worse.

    lunch meats— yes; I like them better warmed anyway though so it’s pretty much a non-issue. Sometimes I’ll slightly undercook my eggs but they’re never super runny. 

    Not a fan of sushi. I am cautious about high-mercury fish but if we had a special occasion or something and there was like an hors d’oeuvre option to try some I would totally take a bite or two.

    I hate going to salons in general because the smell is so strong to me, so any services I’d do would be as quick and minimal as possible. But that’s easy for me to say because I don’t color my hair.

    I think moderate amounts of caffeine a day are fine— the 200mg or 2 cup limit or whatever. But coffee is totally aversive to me right now anyway so it’s a nonissue.

    Honestly I don’t think it’s necessary to abstain from alcohol 100%. I had a little really early on because I was in shock/disbelief and had already opened a bottle so I finished it over the course of a few nights. Wine now sounds totally puke-worthy to me right now, but if we have a special dinner second or third tri and it sounds good, I’ll have a half glass or glass of dry red wine. 

    Don’t have a cat but if I did I’d have my husband clean the litter box out now because it’s a great excuse.

    For the most part I think exercise is one where we should listen to our bodies. Also it’s one thing to maintain a workout routine and another to jump full-frenzy into something to try and avoid excess weight gain or whatever, so to me the strength training thing isn’t super cut and dry. I’ve been feeling really crummy this week but hope to get back into my Pilates routine soon!

    Oh, and I think hot baths are fine as long as they’re not too hot. Idk how to tell without a thermometer lol but I guess I just listen to my body on that, too.
  • Options
    In terms of risk...I would still have sushi from a GOOD sushi place. I still have a runny yolked egg now and again. I don't care for deli meat, alcohol, or having indoor cats. I'm too lazy to keep up with hair dying so I don't. For some reason I started hating baths within the past two years.  No idea.  I used to be all about a bath.

    I do still drink coffee, but I tend to have HORRIBLE insomnia in pregnancy, so I Iimit to one cup in the morning and drink safe herbal teas later in the day. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • Options
    @Boobopgirl Any good teas to recommend? I’m having a hard time finding safe ones.
  • Options
    @aloha_mama I was using earth mama teas last time. I wasn't a huge fan of the taste but you might like it 
  • Options
    @doxiemoxie212 that unfairness is not lost on me, either. I am very aware that there is often very few choices between where we stand and where they stand. My state does pretty well keeping moms with babies when possible (#4 in the nation) and has in the last 5 years put a lot of effort into diverting people with substance abuse and other mental health issues from the criminal justice system but also isn't anything compared to what some other countries are doing or what it could be. 
  • Options
    @aloha_mama I also use earth mama teas.  Right now I'm drinking the morning sickness one, but I also enjoy the peaceful mama one (in fact I always ask people to get me that when they're like "what can I do for you after baby is born).  I like the third trimester one andy midwives recommend it, but not every care provider is ok with the uterine tonic teas.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Pregnancy Ticker
  • Options
    No to: Deli meats, runny eggs, raw fish, unpasteurized cheese

    Yes to: highlights (but prob not all over dye) coffee (I have an aversion atm, but I can still handle iced coffee with almond milk which I require to function normally), I am a-ok with a glass of wine or a beer here and there in the second and third trimesters. 

    Q: I’m on the fence about hot tubs- never went in with my first two, but now I have one and can control the temp. For those measuring, what is the reccomended temp?
  • Options
    @miss_lynn9 @Boobopgirl Thank you! I’ll look them up. I had a preemie last pregnancy so I’m trying to be extra careful this time around.
  • Options
    Okay, risky things... my midwives have a great 'updated' list of advice; I'll try and find it and share 

    Cold deli meat - I don't really eat this, except for prosciutto (cured, not processed), and I still eat that... but I probably wouldn't care if I did eat it
    Public gatherings (covid) - this, I'm really cautious about, even being in an area with high vaccination rates and medium spread... I'm fully vaccinated, but there are some scary studies coming out showing significant complications for pregnant people, including preterm birth and IUGR, so I'm not taking any chance (and I'm an introvert)
    Coffee - I have two small children, I can't live without it (but, since I'm still nursing, I never do more than two cups a day, even pre-pregnancy)
    Alcohol - nothing in the first tri (can't imagine wanting any), but I'm okay to have the odd small glass of wine later on (I'm looking at you, Beaujolais day!) 
    Baths - this is pretty debunked, so long as you aren't having something ridiculously hot... the concern is raising your body temp too high, and since baths cool as soon as you stop adding water, it's not much of a risk; hot tubs are riskier, since you can overheat really quickly, so I try to only go in family temperature ones, and only for 5-10 minutes (but it's a non-issue, since I'm not going to any public pools in a pandemic)
    Sushi - I still eat it, as long as it is a place that I know and has high quality fish - I just watch out for the high mercury fish
    Runny eggs - Still eat them
    Med-rare meat - Still eat it... I think I had one medium well steak and my first pregnancy, and said never again haha
    I don't dye my hair or get my nails done, so never really think about any of those risks. 
  • Options
    Okay - so from my midwife info:

    Recent improvements to standards and regulations of foods have led to a decline in foodborne illnesses, and recent evidence around safety of foods in pregnancy has changed our recommendations to pregnant people. Although pregnant people have an increased risk of becoming ill from pathogens such as E. coli, Listeria, or toxoplasmosis, the absolute risk of contracting bacteria from most foods is quite low. Recommendations surrounding foods to “avoid” or “limit” in pregnancy have changed. Most foods are now considered acceptable to eat in moderation during pregnancy.

    On this basis, it is no longer considered necessary for pregnant women to avoid foods such as deli meats, soft cheeses, soft-cooked eggs, sushi, or sashimi. Rather than avoiding these foods, try to obtain these items from reputable sources, and ensure that you store them properly. When food is handled and stored properly, the risk of contracting Listeria or other harmful bacteria is extremely low. It is also important to practice good handwashing techniques, and follow Food Safe precautions, including avoiding cross contamination of raw meat with other food items. As with any person - pregnant or not - avoid eating raw or undercooked pork, poultry, or ground beef; use your common sense; and ask your midwife if you have any specific concerns. 

    They still recommend limiting/avoiding:
    - Fish that's high in mercury (avoid)
    - Liver (limit)
    - Caffeine (limit)
    - Raw unpasteurized eggs (avoid)
    - Sugar (limit)

  • Options
    Can't remember if anyone mentioned it, but if anyone is a tuna fan, the SafeCatch tuna that is mercury tested is SO good. Kept buying it after I wasn't pregnant any more because I like the taste better and it's supposed to maintain more Omega 3s the way it's processed. 
    @doula-mama I like the update from your midwives! Much more practical. And I agree - well done steak is disgusting. 
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards