The Great Big Question Thread

fameonmain2

**stolen from another board, I thought it might be nice to have for all of our random questions that come up! **

Ask your questions here! Whether they are for STM/STM+s to answer, they are TMI, or even if you think they are dumb. (They're not.) Let's hear 'em!

minnie_yoga_mama

Question for all you mamas! I just got back from my confirmation of pregnancy visit at the OB office— they told me due to the recent increase in COVID in our area they are no longer allowing the father to attend appointments with you, including even ultrasounds! My hubby was devastated when he heard this. He’s been really looking forward to the ultrasounds and wants so badly to be a part of it. I know this is kind of a new area for us all, but has anyone else encountered this as an obstacle yet? I thought about trying to video chat with him during the ultrasound so he can see it in real time— any other advice or suggestions?

kiwi2628

@minniecat this is common and has occurred throughout Covid to varying degrees depending on location/outbreaks etc. Take videos but also know the time between now and our 20 week scans (the big one) is a lot of time and things may change so I would just wait to see what happens

doxiemoxie212

@minniecat I'm sorry but yes, this has been common throughout covid. Ask about the videochatting or recording video of any kind - some offices don't allow that, but he should be able to be on the phone with you at the very least, and you can ask them if they will print photos and/or a disk with video of the ultrasound for you (they'll almost certainly do the photos, but the disk seems hit or miss - mine for DD never would).

SmashJam

@minniecat I'm expecting similar here as things progress, but pre covid with DS2 my H couldn't come to the ultrasounds due to work and I put him on the phone. I didn't have a lot of ultrasounds- just one at 13 weeks and the anatomy scan and the fetal echo, but they let me put him on speaker for the big reveal at the anatomy scan.

minnie_yoga_mama

Thanks ladies! My first US is in 3 weeks, so I’ll def ask about a video disc or video chatting. I’m sure he’ll at least want to be on speaker phone.

fameonmain2

@bumpadmin @rosesareblue242 can you please sticky this?

doxiemoxie212

Did members get mod powers back? I thought @BumpAdmin had to sticky?

kiwi2628

@BumpAdmin sticky plz

lemon0416

#TMI question: How do you guys deal with anxiety around spotting? I seem to spot a tiny bit every 4 or 5 days and after sex. Today there was a drop of bright red blood with very light brown CM and it is freaking me out! I’m 6 + 3 today. I get that it’s all good unless it’s a lot, but could use some encouragement from STMs &TTMs+ as this is my first pregnancy!

lemon0416

And ps, yes I have changed my username but for some reason it’s still not showing up when I post 😔

kiwi2628

Knottie- spotting is super normal because your placenta is digging into your uterine wall and blood vessels, along with your cervix increasing its blood flow and being sensitive. Very common and normal. I had a ton of spotting with my second because I had a sunchorionic hematoma (basically a bruise beneath the placenta). Also very common and typically not worrisome. If it’s only spotting it’s likely nothing. Blood flow is concerning. 

kiwi2628

Also seriously @BumpAdmin can you please sticky this thread?

Blondesweety444

I spotted almost my entire first tri with my son. I think it was partly due to the fact that I was on progesterone suppositories. I spotted once this pregnancy so far. It was a few days after sex and was mostly just a bit of brown mucus. Try not to worry yourself too much!

lemon0416

@kiwi2628 @Blondesweety444 Thank you! This has eased my mind so much! I didn’t really think through HOW the placenta gets attached to the uterine wall, so that makes a lot of sense. So grateful for your responses!

kiwi2628

@BumpAdmin can you PLEASE tag this thread?

also if anyone else wants to tag them to get their attention here…

Avrilmai

@BumpAdmin can we get a sticky for this thread please! thanks. 

maggiemadeit

@BumpAdmin Sticky, please and thank you! 

juleschristen

I’m freaking myself out .. how can I calm my fears? After three miscarriages and now pregnant (heard heartbeat 6 w 4 d  at 118 and of course they are saying they want it at 120) so now I’m worried baby will stop growing. Im 40 have had some light pink when I wipe and dark brown dot or two in underwater. Ultrasound follow up next Wednesday and I’m scared. No support from my toxic mother that’s another story. 

Im hoping heartbeat means healthy preg and risks drop but I can’t stop worrying or googling. Anyone else?

juleschristen

@minnie_yoga_mama so frustrating! Same here although for now they are allowing husbands at mine but that could change! Could he go with you and sit in parking lot and FaceTime?

Avrilmai

knottie9f75b2a9950a8f58 said:

And ps, yes I have changed my username but for some reason it’s still not showing up when I post 😔

Sometimes you have to log out and log back in again for the name change to work. 

kiwi2628

@juleschristen I would call my RE and say you’re bleeding a bit and want an u/s sooner. Given your history it’s very reasonable

juleschristen

@kiwi2628 I’m not currently this was before and had ultrasound. Just worried about everything

minnie_yoga_mama

@juleschristen I was having quite a bit of anxiety about the baby being healthy when I first found out I was pregnant as well (I also fell down a Google rabbit hole). What helped me immensely was Bettina Rae’s YouTube videos for pregnancy meditation and yoga for anxiety. She has a whole playlist specifically for practices for anxiety during pregnancy, and also speaks about fear after having experienced miscarriage. If it’s something you’re interested in, I highly recommend, as it’s something that really helped to get my anxiety under control!

Ivorytower2

For anyone taking unisom/B6, would it work to take it earlier in the day as well as at bedtime or would it be impossible to function?

ccc1211

@juleschristen I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way. I have found four-square breathing to be helpful with my own anxieties and wanted to pass along this link: https://www.healthline.com/health/box-breathing#tips-for-beginners

SmashJam

@Ivorytower2 if I remember correctly I couldn't take it in the morning. But I know plenty of people who did and struggled through the tiredness bc it was more manageable than the nausea.

jennykatedvm

@Ivorytower2 same story as @SmashJam . Even half a tab makes me nonfunctional, but my coworker was able to take it twice daily and wasn't much more tired than usual. I'm the same way without Benadryl, so probably depends on how sensitive you are to antihistamines 🤷

covegirl100

Experiencing the same thing here in BC Canada ☹ I'm hoping to take a video with my phone for my hubby. 

doula-mama

knottieb8d3e353dd24f2e7 said:

Experiencing the same thing here in BC Canada ☹ I'm hoping to take a video with my phone for my hubby. 

Are you talking about not being able to have your partner at the u/s? Where in BC are you? I’m in BC, and a doula, and everyone I know is allowed to have them (usually they have to wait outside the clinic and the staff call them on their cell). No children though. 

Avrilmai

@Ivorytower2 I was told to take half of the unisom and half of the B6 morning and mid-day if needed. Are you doing half or the whole?

Ivorytower2

@Avrilmai thanks for your help! I’ve been taking half and a quarter of B6 around 7pm, but I have been really struggling earlier in the day, so wanted to see if it would be ok to take the same dosage earlier around like 2pm and then again at night. I’ve been OK in the mornings so far 🤞

kiwi2628

@bumpadmin please sticky this post

loveanddatadriven

@bumpadmin please sticky

shellcoug

I took both throughly first tri with my first but could only function with 1/2 unisom only at night. This round I was told 25mg B6 three times a day and a unisom (or half) in the evenings. I do think the B6 during the day helps. 

doxiemoxie212

if unisom + b6 are not cutting it, please ask your doctor for a prescription! Don't just suffer through constant debilitating nausea! 

stardustskies

@Ivorytower2 I would definitely stick with taking the unisom in the evening, but the b6 you should be able to take at like 4 hour intervals throughout the day

stardustskies

Also, ask your doctor about Bonjesta. It's wonderful.

Ivorytower2

Thanks everyone! I took Diclegis with my last pregnancy and took it in afternoon and at night but wasn’t sure with unisom. The nausea has for sure reached a debilitating level so I am going to ask next week about Bonjesta and Zofran. Thanks for the recommendations and advice!

covegirl100

@doula-mama We are in Vancouver. He wasn't allowed into the fertility clinic ultrasound. We were also told he couldn't come to our ultrasound appointment at a general ultrasound clinic but they changed the rules a few days before our appointment so he could come in!! (This happened last week).

covegirl100

@kiwi2628 thank you for this! I had ivf and was taking progesterone and estrogen and stopped yesterday. I then had light spotting and cramping last night, which terrified me. Still crampy today. The clinic said it was likely just a coincidence that it is happening when I stopped the meds but that spotting/cramps are normal during the 1st trimester. Anyways, thanks for explaining in more depth, I've been so nervous all day.