SAY WHAT!?!?!?

mamaj1220

@drkoyya I feel you, it is starting to become more obvious to me that it is a baby bump but I am plus size as well so I am not sure how many other people just think it is normal, I realized the other that now my bump sticks out more than my boobs so I am betting it won't be long until people want to be all up in my business.

randic22

@drkoyya @mamaj1220 I feel you both. I'm also plus size and have what I've heard referred to as a "B belly" I'm happy that its finally starting to round out. I think people who didnt know just assumed I gained a lot of weight😫

splashmountain

Yesterday one of the pink ladies at work looked me up and down and said "you're either pregnant or you quit your weight watchers already" ...geee thanks

sunshinesea22

@splashmountain RUDE. 

pirateduck

@splashmountain in what realm is that comment appropriate?

ruby696

@splashmountain Wow. Just wow.

bananapanda

Last pregnancy I was like 7-8 months pregnant, huge, wearing a tight shirt with ruched sides so obviously 100% pregnant, but I went into a gas station for something and the clerk was like "is it a boy or a girl?" and I said "I'm not pregnant" and walked out because I was pissy haha

jhysmath

@bananapanda Around 20 weeks when I was pregnant with DD the maintenance man in our school district said wow you're pregnant huh? in front of students when we weren't telling students yet, so I said "no I'm not, just fat, but thank you for pointing out"  He was so embarrassed. MH saw him the next day and went up to him and said I have to talk to you, and he was so apologetic, MH had to stop him and explain we weren't telling students yet and there were some in the office but really yes I was pregnant. It still make me laugh today. 

The only comments I get are from MH when he states wow your bump is really showing now, now that I'm pulling out the maternity pants and shirts and walking around in maternity leggings with a tight shirt. He claims I look as pregnant now as I did when I was 7 months with our first and I have to remind him a stretched out balloon will blow up faster and bigger than a fresh one from the bag. 
 

ruby696

I was picking up dog food from the feed store with DS and DD last weekend. The 70ish yo gentleman ringing me up was very nice and offered help out to my car, which I declined. Then he saw my kids (3 & 5) and goes, "well you've got your hands full." I politely smiled and turned to leave, and that's when he realized I was pregnant. He goes, "well, you're really about to have your hands full. That's why we stopped at two." Oh, really sir? Well if only I'd talked to you before spending $20k on IVF, maybe I would have known better. I didn't tell him I was having twins. He probably would have had a stroke.

randic22

@ruby696 *cringe* all the weird comments I've gotten has been from elderly people as well. They are also bump touchers in my experience. 

jrouge12

@drkoyya @splashmountain @ruby696 I'm so stunned that people would even make those comments. WTF?

lajoliedreamer

Ugh, people are so rude.

My mom keeps asking if I'm sure there aren't twins in there. She will not let it go and I'm so over it. Yes, I'm bigger than I was with DD, but it is 100% certain that there is only one so stop making me feel humongous! 

pirateduck

I got a handful of comments early about twins, not because of my size, but because people knew I was having trouble having kids and had seen the RE.  First of all, I would know if I was having twins.  Also, I don't like the assumptions people make about my treatment.  If you want to know about my treatment, please ask.  I certainly needed people to talk to when I was dealing with infertility, where were all these people then?  Furthermore, I got pregnant on a natural/unmedicated cycle, but again, no one asks any details ever, they just make assumptions and the occasional inappropriate comment as a result.

pourmeanothermocktail

My other grandmother (not the one who insisted her baby was carried in her butt)  last time at about 24 weeks declared a was big enough to be done, so either it was twins, or dates were wrong, or baby was going to be super early...because that's what a preemie mom needs to hear. Ever.

When I hadn't had her by 37 weeks, she upped it to triplets or baby must be 12 lbs, why hadn't I "gotten that taken out yet." Again, definitely what an abused c-section mom needs to hear. 

Born at 8 lbs 8 oz, single (duh), at 38+6. Sorry, short torso and I ate ALL THE FOOD and gained ALL THE WEIGHT. Shut up grandma.

shamrocandroll

@ruby696 *applause* Super proud of you for actually saying that to him!!!

mokay19

Mine wasn’t rude but just kind of funny (everyone knows I’m pregnant. There’s no hiding it)...

I was walking through the plant today with a male coworker. We went to walk through the door and I opened it and held it since I was the first to the door and he goes “I appreciate it, but I just cannot let you hold the door for me. I can’t be that guy that allows the pregnant person hold the door for him.” Haha I laughed and gladly walked through the door first. 

ruby696

@shamrocandroll hold the applause - I only thought the snarky reply. Damn my parents for making me respect my elders even when they don't deserve it.

jrouge12

Walking with colleagues today and one said "You're already walking like you're pregnant. " My response was "Well my hip pain is off the charts and it feels like I'm being consistently kicked in the crotch." I definitely feel ridiculous waddling around at 22-weeks but I'd be fine with no one else pointing it out. 

lisush

Ugh what is wrong with people and all their comments??

There is one nurse at work that nobody can stand and we're just dying to fire. On Tuesday we had an all hands meeting and she saw me for the first time in a while. she started saying how I look different and I'm really "filling out." Pretty sure she was referring to my face also. Ugh if it hadn't been a coworker I would have gone off on her.

Otherwise I get lots of comments from my coworkers about my belly and being so cute and pregnant, which I'm all for since they're really like my second family and are part of this pregnancy lol.

shamrocandroll

@ruby696 Way to kill my dreams, hahaha.  I get it though.  I never have the guts to say something in those situations, no matter how much they deserve it sometimes!

shamrocandroll

I have an opposite "say what!?" story for your amusement:

I was just walking/hobbling down the hallway when our director of operations stopped me and the following conversation occurred:

Him: Are you limping?
Me: No, mostly just waddling.
Him: Did you injure yourself?
Me: No, my hips are just a mess
Him: Ah, I feel your pain. Getting old sucks.
Me: Well, in my case, old and pregnant.
Him: Ah!
(then we began our actual conversation)

It was pretty funny.  I'm pretty obviously pregnant at this point, and I gave him enough to work with, but he just did not want to make that jump to "you must be pregnant" on his own.  Smart guy. 

empiricalnarwhal

Lately A large portion of people who find out I am pregnant have been responding with "Oh, a gemini!!" after finding out when baby is due, i just think it's funny how the astrological sign of my son to be suprises/gets a reaction out of them! 

jrouge12

@shamrocandroll Haha! I guess you know who pays attention to your midsection. 

Another not so terrible Say What: A colleague has been asking me if I have any "news" every time I see her. I kept purposely not saying the obvious. Yesterday she had me cornered and I finally said, "well I think my news is pretty obvious". She admitted she'd been trying to get me to say it and I admitted I was purposely not say it. 😂

heatherlynn321

A woman at school today was like, "Oh wow, you're close to the end aren't you. What, 6 weeks left?" Stop guessing how far along I am unless you are actually sure! No, I do not have 6 weeks left, I have 16 weeks left. It's like people assuming you're pregnant, never assume unless that person has actually told you they are pregnant. Do not guess how far along I am or when I'm due unless you are 100% sure of my due date. 

shamrocandroll

@heatherlynn321 This happened to me last week.  A lady who works here, who literally JUST realized I was pregnant (by shouting "I knew you were cooking something in that oven!" in the hallway) a few weeks ago, stopped me and asked "so when is that little muffin due?"  I told her early May, and she was like "MAY!?  That's so far!"  Lady, you literally just confirmed I was even pregnant like 2 weeks ago!  And I'm really not even that big yet.  And why is it always other women who say this sh*t to each other?  You'd think we'd know better.  

ruby696

I walked into a deposition a few days ago and the other attorney present (male) takes one look at me and goes, "whoa." He wisely shut up after that slipped out.

shamrocandroll

@ruby696 You should be like "Yeah, watch out, I'm arguing for 3!"

ruby696

I didn't respond to him at first, but later on a break found out his associate (who was there) had 1.5 yo twins, so it was actually a fun conversation. He did not participate - smart man.

jrouge12

@ruby696 Probably not an ok time to slap someone...even if warranted. 

Yesterday I was in the hall greeting students as they came in when a staff member came by and said "Oh wow you're expecting a baby, but you're so small? When are you due, next year?" (Meaning school year, not 2021). I replied "No, due in May. But people said they thought I looked smaller last pregnancy too." And her comment that was the doozy:
"Oh, you're going to blow up this time." 

1. I get comments about "how small I look" more often than not. I don't get it. I am very clearly pregnant and not small. 

2. No person pregnant or not wants to hear how they're going to "blow up".

ruby696

@jrouge12 Wow, that's, um.... I mean, why do people think that's okay? I just don't get it. Pregnancy makes people lose their common sense. There is no other situation where people would say (and do) the things they do when someone is pregnant. 

splashmountain

@jrouge12 and @ruby696 I don't understand why anyone thinks it's ok to comment on a person's body, especially during pregnancy.  I don't need to hear about how big I'm getting, I know, I'm the one that has to bend over to tie my shoes, believe me, I'm aware of how big I'm getting, thank you very much!

shamrocandroll

@jrouge12 The same woman who I quoted a few posts above also said some really messed up stuff to me after I had DS.  I had a lot of nausea and food aversions with him, so I didn't gain a lot of weight.  He was born at almost 9 lbs, and I ended up weighing significantly less than I did pre-pregnancy.  When I got back to work, she said to me "Look at you, Skinny Minnie!" and then followed that up with "Wait until you have another one.  The weight won't come off so easily!"  Like, jeez, way to give me a compliment and then make me feel like sh*t within 5 seconds!  I haven't gotten huge for either of my pregnancies either, and people made all kinds of inappropriate remarks to me, too.  It's like you can't win, no matter what.  You're either having twins, or people are concerned about your health.  Ugh.

bananapanda

My MIL made a harmless but entertaining comment last night.  She asked how big baby was and I said that at our growth scan last week she was about 1lb 8oz, but I know she's growing quickly.  She replied "don't they say about a pound a week now?" I pray we are not having a 17lb baby  I get she's not aware of how many weeks I have left and she's also a little ditsy in general, but still funny.

afranzen85

@shamrocandroll Absolutely, you cannot win with people. It's always the same people who make comments while you are pregnant that make comments when you're not.

My SIL is the worst about it, which is actually terrible because she should know better having four children herself. Constant comments about "How will you manage 4?" "Wow, you've really popped!" "Are you sure there aren't two in there?" And my favorite was after I had my 3rd child, I did major work to get myself back and lost over 50 lbs which was 20 more than I gained "I wish breastfeeding worked that well for me." MH actually stepped in and said "well, I'm sure the breastfeeding has helped, but she's worked her ass off to get into this shape." My response wouldn't have been as nice.

soprano19

The other day I got my first "Are you sad this one isn't a boy? Are you going to try again for a boy?" It was from a coworker, so I had to restrain myself a little, but I looked her dead in the eye and said, "No, our daughters will be enough for us, thanks."

shamrocandroll

@soprano19 Nothing sets me off worse than that.  I'm bracing myself for the comments we get when people find out we had another boy (which they won't until after he's born) and I'm going to go full mama bear on them.  

afranzen85

@soprano19 I have 3 girls and when we announced this would be our 4th and final child every comment was "so this one is a boy then?" 🙄 

thepretzelchick

We've only told close family what we're having and we've gotten more than a few comments about how glad they are we're having another boy so that DD can be the only "princess." I'm anticipating it from even more people once he's born. Why can't "Congratulations!" be enough? 

soprano19

@shamrocandroll @afranzen85 @thepretzelchick the thing that bugs me about comments like this is the implication that we would be raising boys and girls differently. Sure, DD1 likes Frozen and Tangled, but she also likes trains, buses, and airplanes, which are stereotypically "boy" toys/interests. She also likes playing outside, singing songs, and reading books, which are "every kid" activities. I don't push my children toward certain activities based on their genitalia and I find it offensive that people make those assumptions.

shamrocandroll

@soprano19 DS's favorite movie is Frozen, and he hates being dirty.  Anyone who tries to imply those things make him less masculine in front of me had better duck before my fist hits them.