I've literally jumped out of an airplane but am terrified to make a 3 hour round-trip solo to my dad's tomorrow with LO.
He and his wife aren't particularly 'good' with babies, so I'll be there all day fending for myself with fussy-pants. Mind you I do this at home all the time, but for some reason this is giving me massive amounts of anxiety. I think maybe it's the long drive? Which is stupid too because he usually just sleeps.
I'm pretty much forcing myself to do it and just get over it already. I can't live in a bubble!
I'm with you Dani. Not the same sitch at all, but I'm simultaneously hating living in a bubble and nowhere near ready to break out of it.
Fell in Love: January 2003
Married: May 2006
Baby Girl Born: April 2014 If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you:
OMG producing milk has kept my appetite and cravings at pregnancy level. All of the sugars! I can't even take a 5hr nap without waking up with a gnawing feeling in my stomach. So much for that post-partum weight loss.
OMG producing milk has kept my appetite and cravings at pregnancy level. All of the sugars! I can't even take a 5hr nap without waking up with a gnawing feeling in my stomach. So much for that post-partum weight loss.
I have given up on PP weight loss. Seems like all the weight I loss right after delivery is all the weight I will lose.
@KatieGummow FX everything is ok! My DS1 was born with a small head and by 2 month check up it was off the charts huge. We had to see neurologists and get cat scans, but he is 2 now and just has a crazy massive head. Everything has been fine, we still have to go once a year to make sure, but he is doing great. Hopefully it is the same with your Patrick!
Well sleep is not happening for this mama. LO woke up around 1:40 to eat, and then would not go back to sleep. She drifted off a little, but every time I put her down, she would wake up screaming within 10 minutes. She is now sound asleep on my chest, but I don't dare attempt to put her down again. Maybe I'll try in like 10-15 minutes, but I'm not holding my breath. At least there is coffee!
Thanks for the love and support from everyone. Last night was rough. Merri decided to hate sleep and be awake from 2 until...uh, just now. Nap time for me? Not even close. I have four interviews to conduct. Also trying to make an appointment with my doc to discuss my own anxiety and depression. Last night was just seriously the worst. Went to deep dark places in my head and I'm afraid I'm just not strong enough for all of this shit. Talked to hubster's mom and she offered a place for me to stay. I mentioned that to hubster though and he lost it. At least I can bury my very tired self into work and being a mom today.
Makes me wonder, what about me? (And does doing so make me selfish?)
My DH is driving me nuts. Yesterday I was in hell with growth spurt stuff. Spent the whole day on the couch. Texted DH to bring home dinner, which he did. Of course, when he gets home from work, LO is sleeping soundly for the first time all day. He decides to go play in a soccer game, then went out drinking with the guys afterwards (he never told me this, just didn't show up at home for hours). The icing was that he posted something on fb about how great his life is and how he's lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful people.
I took this all way too personally, and I'm resentful as hell. How lovely for him that he gets to leave a screaming baby for hours on end, after a full day of work!!! You know who would like to leave the baby for a fucking hour? I WOULD. And you get to surround yourself with friends and go out drinking for 4 hours? I hate you!
This has been brewing for a while and I need to wait till I can have a rational conversation about it before I bring it up. I feel like he's being selfish and acting like a single guy, and that he needs to do a better job of supporting me. Solidarity in the trenches. I feel like I'm doing it all alone, and it's exhausting. We're in this together, but it doesn't feel like it.
BFP: 7/5/10 EDD: 3/13/11 Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks
BFP: 10/30/10 EDD: 7/7/11 Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.
BFP: 7/30/13 EDD: 4/9/14 Born right on time on his due date! 8lb10oz, 21.5 in.
Awesome prophetic fortune cookie: Love is a present that can be given every single day you live
@PoppySeedWindsor I'm tearing up just reading that . You need support too. I haven't been on your end of this situation but my DH was. You aren't being selfish, while he has no mental control over his anexity right now, he does have the control to get help and he is the selfish one by not doing so. I'm glad that your MIL is there for you and supporting you.
Don't want to sound creepy but I wish I could give you some IRL hugs.
~Missed MC at 8 weeks. D&C at 12 weeks on 4/17/13~
@PoppySeedWindsor I'm tearing up just reading that . You need support too. I haven't been on your end of this situation but my DH was. You aren't being selfish, while he has no mental control over his anexity right now, he does have the control to get help and he is the selfish one by not doing so. I'm glad that your MIL is there for you and supporting you.
Don't want to sound creepy but I wish I could give you some IRL hugs.
Nothing creepy about wanting to give a real hug. She needs all the hugs right now. When one of us is going through a tough time I always wish we could all just meet up on my porch and talk to each other over coffee or wine or whatever.
@PoppySeedWindsor
You're not being selfish! You can't take care of anyone, especially not Merri, if you can't take care of yourself first. Yes, these babies are our whole worlds, but WE are also THEIR whole world. They need the best us that we can possibly give them, and taking steps to do that is NOT selfish.
I'm so sorry for all the stress you're under right now, but I'm really glad that at least MIL is being so supportive and helpful. Big creepy hugs.
Thank you SO much for saying this. I think it's something I forget basically all the time. You all are so so so so so so right. If I can't take care of myself and be the best me I'm capable of being, I won't be able to make it. Being the best me requires some self TLC:
1. Make doctor's appointment.
2. Discuss with MIL about flying to California for a week.
3. Make a "make me feel happy" appointment with my hairdresser, at a nail salon, or tattoo parlor.
Starting to worry about Luke. 2 months old and only 10lbs 3 oz. he was 5 10 at birth. I just feel like he's such a little dude and so many of your babies are passing him in weight and they are weeks younger than he is. I feel like my BM is bad or something and not doing it's job even though there is plenty of it.
His ped doesn't seemed concerned but I feel like a bad mom.
for the mommies with the anxiety: you will feel so much better after discussing it with your dr. together you can discuss which type of treatment would be best for you and your family. whether it is medication, therapy, time-outs, or none of the above it is a step in the right direction.
::short backstory::
i have had issues with depression for almost 20 years. knowing how much better i felt and did overall while on medication and after having a long crying conversation with both my BF & dr, it prompted me to start taking zoloft in december. i was trying to prevent the PPD i knew that would hit and to help the depression that took over me at that time from anxiety & stress. it ended up being the right decision for me and i'm still on it now.
so my hope is that whatever path of treatment you end up with helps both you and your family. you can't live with the constant fear, anxiety & stress, it's really not good for you. an overall happier mommy is what is best for our babies. please take the steps needed to be those happy mommies!
@Mamamonzo being worried makes you a great mom. If the pedi isn't worried you shouldn't be. Enjoy that baby and his light weight. Wear the hell out of him while you can. :x
@teresa1896 I hope you and DH get to have a good chat... it sucks when they do that. My DH decided he could go to Crossfit right after work and stay for an extra hour and a half to hang out, just in time to get home, be sleepy, and announce he was going to bed. He did that for a few nights in a row during one of LO's growth spurts, and he and I had a come to Jesus talk. Now he realizes sometimes he's just got to pull the dad card when his buddies ask him to go do stuff. Not every time, but enough to help me be a successful (and not insane) momma.
On the PP anxiety front, I mentioned it to DH last night, and the asshat had the gall to flippantly say something to the effect of, Oh that's just something women make up, etc etc, sounds like you all the time, what's the difference...
In brighter news, I got the double rainbow of baby burps last night out of LO! He refuses to burp for me (but will do it for anyone else), but last night at our 2am feed, we did the side by side rock, then the back to front, and he let out this huge burpola and I was ecstatic. Then, to my surprise, he did it AGAIN. Color me stunned. I burst out laughing and startled LO.
@Mamamonzo, you're doing great! Your baby's gained 4.5 lbs in 2 months- that's awesome!!! My daughter was a slow weight gainer as a baby and never gained that much that fast.
BFP: 7/5/10 EDD: 3/13/11 Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks
BFP: 10/30/10 EDD: 7/7/11 Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.
BFP: 7/30/13 EDD: 4/9/14 Born right on time on his due date! 8lb10oz, 21.5 in.
Awesome prophetic fortune cookie: Love is a present that can be given every single day you live
The Swerb house is a mess tonight. DH is now frustrated because DD won't stay asleep no matter what, but she won't eat either. It's gonna be a long night. I have a feeling DD is only going to sleep ON me tonight.
Emma did the EXACT same thing at 3 weeks. Hope the night wasn't too horrible.
@Mamamonzo my DD was and still is little. She has never been above the 20th% for weight and at almost 5 years old is only 35 lbs. She's just made to be little. DS1 is 2 and only 25lbs, he's on the small side too.
Not sure what Logan fed on because he is huge compared to what his bro and sis were at 1 month = /:)
~Missed MC at 8 weeks. D&C at 12 weeks on 4/17/13~
Sorry not reading the 500+ posts I have missed....I don't know how you ladies have time to post, I hardly have time to breath most days!
@michaelad3 our hospital only gives out size one...even for premies, they just fold them down, so I definitely wouldn't bother buying more newborn size.
How often are you guys hanging lo's diaper at night? Every time he/she wakes for a feeding? Or just after a certain amount of time? I hate to wake her if I can avoid it
@smushi can I TP your DH for that comment? Please don't listen to him and if you have any thought that you might be dealing with a PP mood disorder, talk to your doctor. I waited way to long to get help and I regret what I put my family through over the last 4 years.
~Missed MC at 8 weeks. D&C at 12 weeks on 4/17/13~
James' favorite game is chicken, especially when it comes to coffee. Every morning, I try to hold out making coffee in the hopes that he'll take a nice long nap. Every morning he wins by being so annoying that I cave, make a cup, drink it while he screams in my ear awhile, and then he inevitably takes a 3-4hr nap while I'm too wired to go back to sleep. Someday, I shall beat him at this game. But so far this week the score is James 5, Mommy 0.
Trouble in paradise. Starting at 10pm last night someone started screaming and would not stop. He nursed every hour (screaming if he unlatched), was in his swing, vibrating chair, nothing helped...2 hrs of sleep later...he woke up screaming again (instead of his sweet little grumbles) to eat. I call growth spurt and dammmmn they are brutal. That high pitched screaming can make someone lose their mind. He finally is a little relaxed with my mom and I am going to hide in the shower...
May the Fourth Be With You: Our 5-4-14 Baby: Andrew Joseph
@PoppySeedWindsor I don't have much to say that other ladies haven't already said but I hope things get better for you. My DH is bipolar and for the first year of our marriage we really struggled. I can't imagine going through it with a newborn. You're a strong woman and Merri is lucky to have you for a mother!
Craft question: I made salt dough and did hand prints. It said to bake 3 hours at 100 my oven only goes down to 170 so I did that for 3 hours. The dough is still soft. Does it take a few days to fully harden up or did I do something wrong!?
Re: Longest Thread EVER! (aka Random Thoughts Thread )
Baby Girl Born: April 2014
If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you:
Baby Girl Born: April 2014
If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you:
A14 Siggy Challenge (November): Favorite Fall Smell
@aviola329 thank you
I took this all way too personally, and I'm resentful as hell. How lovely for him that he gets to leave a screaming baby for hours on end, after a full day of work!!! You know who would like to leave the baby for a fucking hour? I WOULD. And you get to surround yourself with friends and go out drinking for 4 hours? I hate you!
This has been brewing for a while and I need to wait till I can have a rational conversation about it before I bring it up. I feel like he's being selfish and acting like a single guy, and that he needs to do a better job of supporting me. Solidarity in the trenches. I feel like I'm doing it all alone, and it's exhausting. We're in this together, but it doesn't feel like it.
BFP: 7/5/10 EDD: 3/13/11 Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks
BFP: 10/30/10 EDD: 7/7/11 Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.
BFP: 7/30/13 EDD: 4/9/14 Born right on time on his due date! 8lb10oz, 21.5 in.
Awesome prophetic fortune cookie: Love is a present that can be given every single day you live
BFP: 7/5/10 EDD: 3/13/11 Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks
BFP: 10/30/10 EDD: 7/7/11 Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.
BFP: 7/30/13 EDD: 4/9/14 Born right on time on his due date! 8lb10oz, 21.5 in.
Awesome prophetic fortune cookie: Love is a present that can be given every single day you live
His ped doesn't seemed concerned but I feel like a bad mom.
BFP: 7/5/10 EDD: 3/13/11 Miscarriage 8/1/10 at 8 weeks
BFP: 10/30/10 EDD: 7/7/11 Born 7/11//11 7lb12oz, 20 in.
BFP: 7/30/13 EDD: 4/9/14 Born right on time on his due date! 8lb10oz, 21.5 in.
Awesome prophetic fortune cookie: Love is a present that can be given every single day you live
BFP#2 7/28/13 EDD 4/9/14 Birthday : 4/10/14 Adalyn Nanette