Longest Thread EVER! (aka Random Thoughts Thread )

hlm184

When did my baby get to be so grown up?  I love it, but I also miss my squish!

deidremaria

(((HUGS))) @mrsw26 it'll pass. Hopefully it's nothing major and your little girl is just a peanut in need of a little formula

edoliesmom

@MrsW26‌ Everyone is talking about how they saw that comment on your FB page... Now it makes me wonder if you're the person that keeps popping up on the "people you may know" thing that has a baby who I only have A14 people as mutual friends but that I actually have no idea who it is!

edoliesmom

This little baby who has never comfort nursed for longer than a minute in her life suddenly wants to comfort nurse for 10+ minutes for her naps today. What the heck. :-??

lokimau

MrsW26 said:

In other not so good news, DD has only gained am ounce in a month and is officially off the growth charts. Pedi wants us to supplement with formula and schedule labwork and an appointment with a GI specialist to rule out anything that could be causing her not to gain weight. I'm hoping it's just a supply issue even though that also makes me incredibly sad.

we just did all the lab work this past wednesday. now we are just waiting on results. so stressful (hug). we tried to supplement with formula and she would not take any of it

edoliesmom

MrsW26 said:

Thanks everyone! You guys are the best. Thanks @aronie82‌ for chiming in with your comment on fb and @celticlullaby‌ for liking ours lol @lokimau‌ I Hope all your DD's bloodwork comes back ok! Definitely let me know. @edoliesmom‌ Just accepted your request.

Yes, I saw. Thanks! Once I realized who you were, I decided to add. Hope that's not creepy. X_X

edoliesmom

Every time I see the "Started by BiRL" on the main page, I get sad. And I miss @mrscrcalli too! And other people!

kseccomb17

I just got an amazing gift. My uncle stopped by to give me a letter. He works in Alaska and he goes through North Pole, Alaska every 2 weeks to get home. He brings back the kids letters from Santa. I went to open the letter and there was one for me too. The letter said mentioned I'd been through a lot this year and hadn't asked for much and they're proud of me for keeping up with school. My family put together a fund for me, and my uncle put a check covering my tuition for this semester. I can't stop crying. Isn't that just awesome? 

hordol

Aww that made me tear up too, @kseccomb17‌. What a beautiful and thoughtful gift!

Teresa1896

That's great, @kseccomb17‌! What a wonderful gift!

deidremaria

That is so amazing @kseccomb17‌ !!! What a wonderful thing for your family to do

JessieAlbin

Slo mo videos for the win, @mamrotu73‌!

Shelbysteffens

So amazing @kseccomb17‌

deidremaria

Can I vent to you guys?

I feel like my cousin is being railroaded by his fiance's family and friends. The fiance's friend started a go fund me page for funeral and baby expenses which I think is sweet but I don't think she ever asked my cousin if he'd be ok with that. I know my cousin would never feel the need to ask for donations for something that he can afford. There's literally a thread of emails among a local mom group of all these women ready to donate all their babies' things because of this page and I don't think my cousin knows it. I think it's AMAZING that people want to help but I think it's unfair that my cousin is prepared for this baby (which he and his fiancé have been) but no one knows because the friend made this decision for a go fund me without consulting him. I also feel like the fiance's parents expect to take the baby home with them when he's out of the nicu and it makes me sad. I feel like unless the child's FATHER who the mother lived with and was going to marry decides for himself that he can't take on the baby alone then everyone should just back off. I'm also SUPER annoyed by the friend because it's like every hour she's updating her fb status or profile pic making reference to the deceased. I get it, you're sad but shut the fuck up already. Imagine how her fiancé and future step son must feel. They are in a home that they knew with her in it and she's never coming back to them.

deidremaria

I really wanna say something but I don't want to overstep. This whole thing makes me really want to try and figure out setting up a will or something. I know if something were to happen to me Dylan's dad would be strong enough to let everyone know that he stays with him but I still feel like I need something just in case.

deidremaria

MrsW26 said:

@kseccomb17‌ that's so amazing! You deserve it

@deidremaria‌ that's frustrating. I am NOT a fan of overdone social media grieving. And why would you start a go fund me without consulting the person first? And why in the world would his fiancee's parents expect to take his baby home with them???

Edited because I forgot a word. I'm ok with people posting the occasional status about a lost loved one but not the every five minutes stuff.

I have no idea. They never actually said "we're taking the baby" but based on this damn description on the go fund me page it's all, "I'd like to raise money to help (insert deceased's name's) parents with funeral costs and baby expenses." Ummm how about you ask the FATHER of he needs anything for HIS baby before you just jump the gun there "friend"

deidremaria

MrsW26 said:

So after this I promise I'll stop blowing up RTT tonight but I did get a bit of good news today amidst all the stressful stuff....


I'M PREGNANT! Found out this morning but figured I should tell DH before my hundred or so internet friends lol. It killed me not to say anything all day!!!

I had a feeling for the last few days and after being 3 days "late" I took a test. Now I have to figure out a way to fake it through the holidays without anyone finding out until we're ready to share. Oh the problems of being a drunk.

And it's probably a good thing we're starting a bit of formula with DD because my supply will probably tank out now. She flat out refused the first bottle though so this could get interesting. Oh well, bring on the cookies! Cuz you know how I feel about cake.

OH MY GOD CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

deidremaria

Dude. I just went on a fb friend request spree of bumpies

deidremaria

embear22 said:

@deidremaria‌ that is so messed up. I would want to say something too. I also hate the over sharieng of griecing online its fing tacky. I would at least inform your cousin so hes not blindsided by everything.

This is a good idea. I'll shoot him a text in the morning or swing by his house with some food or something.

deidremaria

lia619 said:

@MrsW26‌ congratulations!!!!

@deidremaria‌ your feelings are totally warranted. People can be such idiots in certain situations. I really hope they are collecting the money and planning to hand it over to the baby's father. It has to be so hard not to say something horrible to them!

This is why I'm worried that it's assumed that baby will be going home with grandparents. On the page she says she is collecting money for her friend's parents to help with funeral and baby costs.

deidremaria

dani+california said:

Welp, just dropped Quinn off at my mom's and put him to bed, then balled my eyes out for 15 minutes. I am not excited about this trip at all. I know I will be when I get there, but right now I feel SO guilty and awful. And I hate flying. Sigh.

Off to Jamaica in the morning. Hope everyone has a nice week!

Aww Dani! I'm sorry. I know you'll miss your angel. Try your best to have fun. Get drunk with your husband and have a good time.

Jessimax

@deidremaria‌ not condoning what the grandparents and friends are doing just want to throw in a different perspective; now that their friend/daughter has died they are probably scared about being cut out of the babies life since their connection to her (him?) Is gone. It would be easy for your cousin to take the baby and up and leave and cut them out completely. KWIM?

@MrsW26‌ Congrats!

@dani+california‌ have an awesome time I'm so jealous! Just keep thinking about of happy Quinn will be to see you when you get back. And he won't remember in the long run.

deidremaria

Jessimax said:

@deidremaria‌ not condoning what the grandparents and friends are doing just want to throw in a different perspective; now that their friend/daughter has died they are probably scared about being cut out of the babies life since their connection to her (him?) Is gone. It would be easy for your cousin to take the baby and up and leave and cut them out completely. KWIM?

@MrsW26‌ Congrats!

@dani+california‌ have an awesome time I'm so jealous! Just keep thinking about of happy Quinn will be to see you when you get back. And he won't remember in the long run.

I can get that but he is a VERY family oriented person who believes in keeping relatives (especially grand parents) around. I know he'd never keep the baby from his other side of the family. Also the island is really small so it'd make it even easier for him to keep baby connected to ALL of his family.

lokimau

Congrats @MrsW26‌

deidremaria

mamrotu73 said:

Yay! @MrsW26‌ So exciting!
I think what I hate about having had a c-section is waiting. I'm so impatient.

@deidremaria‌ That is odd. I mean it's great so many people want to help out. But no one asked him if he wants help? Or even told him they wanted to help? Maybe the grandparents would like baby gear so they are well prepared for visits and babysitting.

Maybe.

deidremaria

celticlullaby said:

deidremaria said:

Jessimax said:

@deidremaria‌ not condoning what the grandparents and friends are doing just want to throw in a different perspective; now that their friend/daughter has died they are probably scared about being cut out of the babies life since their connection to her (him?) Is gone. It would be easy for your cousin to take the baby and up and leave and cut them out completely. KWIM?

@MrsW26‌ Congrats!

@dani+california‌ have an awesome time I'm so jealous! Just keep thinking about of happy Quinn will be to see you when you get back. And he won't remember in the long run.

I can get that but he is a VERY family oriented person who believes in keeping relatives (especially grand parents) around. I know he'd never keep the baby from his other side of the family. Also the island is really small so it'd make it even easier for him to keep baby connected to ALL of his family.

Don't worry, hon - his rights as father trump absolutely everything else. Grandparents don't even have a legal claim to visitation; they can't take his baby.

I mean, I really hope there isn't any ugliness between families, because that'd be just awful in an already tragic situation. But they're probably just trying to do something for their grandchild because that's all they have left of their daughter. I hope. It's so heartbreaking.

It is heartbreaking. I know our whole family is wanting to merge with theirs to provide all the love this baby will ever need. I just hope they are on the same page as us

chichi589

Congratulations @MrsW26‌ !!! How exciting! Add me to the jealous list!

Dani enjoy your trip!

ladygali

Congratulations @MrsW26‌ !!

RedDawnsRevenge

Leased a car today, so you could say I'm commited to being a working mom, at least for the next 3 years. Having 7 seats will be nice though.

ladygali

@deidremaria‌ just echoing everyone else. That sucks and sounds like the friend is inadvertently (or not) making a sad situation even worse. I hope you are able to talk with your cousin about it.

edoliesmom

@MrsW26 Congratulations!!!! Maybe your baby will share my birthday.

@deidremaria If your cousin doesn't know, I wouldn't be a bit surprised if their friend hasn't informed the grandparents of all that she's doing either. Also, when my husband died, neither of us had insurance. Funeral expenses never once crossed my mind, and good thing because one of our preacher friends (and I'm sure several other people) help facilitate a donation thing. No one asked me if it was okay; they just did it. Though the people that helped probably knew neither of us had insurance and knew I couldn't afford anything. Might be a different story for your cousin. Over $12K was raised in just a matter of a few days!! I can't even imagine how stressed out I would've been if I thought to myself, "Oh gosh, how am I going to pay for a nice funeral for my husband??" After everything was all said and done, I was overwhelmed and filled with overflowing gratitude when I looked back and realized what a huge burden I never had to carry.

Anyway, I'm not trying to harp on you for being irritated. You're looking out for your cousin, and I get that. I sincerely hope the grandparents don't think they're taking the baby home once out of NICU. But like I said earlier, they might not know the friend is wording anything that way on the gofundme deal. 

ambarnett1

@kseccomb17‌ that is so sweet and generous.

@MrsW26‌ Congrats!!!! That's so exciting. Yay for having 2u2 :P

So, we had our first nightmare experience with DS tonight. He has been sleeping so well, so when he did his 'I'm hurt, help me" cry, DH and I ran in and tried to soothe him. He was flipping out, pushing away, and screaming for a good 5 mins. When he finally woke up he was disoriented and had a 'wtf' look on his face. I checked to see if he has a fever, if his diaper was too tight, if there was something wrong with his sleeper, or if he hurt himself. Nothing. DH was freaking out about a seizure, so I finally told him to GTFO and I put DS back in the crib. He rolled around for a few mins and fell back asleep. I was so scared I wanted to cry, but of course if I freak then DH will freak out. Worst thing ever to not be able to make him feel better. Parenting has some awesome moments and some really shitty moments.

On a happy note, 36 hours until we find out the sex of LO 2.0. MIL is coming with us because she's been having it rough lately with my crazy SIL, finishing her masters, along with work, so we figured she could use some happiness. I'm excited she will be there to share the joy of seeing the baby and finding out with us.

edoliesmom

So on the way to our family date tonight, there was a truck in the left lane that had a couch in the bed. I was watching it go past me while I was going the max speed, and I was in the middle of saying, "That does look very safe" when that freakin' thing flew out!! I had to brake hard and swerve to the right to miss it. I'm pretty sure someone hit it because it was a busy night, and then I only saw 2 cars behind me. What kind of moron transports something hanging out of the bed without strapping it down!?!

CalinAZ

@MrsW26‌ Congratulations!! What exciting news as you start the holidays

@dani+california‌ Enjoy your trip!

Apparently, we weren't meant to eat vegetables tonight. Tried to make a cauliflower and carrot puree (super good substitute for mashed potatoes) and it completely burned. Then, I had DH roast some carrots, and those also burned to a crisp. 

At least the pot roast was super yummy and had some onions, so there was some redeemable healthiness to our dinner. Right? 

And, we're upholding our yearly tradition of watching Love, Actually and drinking wine

edoliesmom

Oh my Lord!! This little girl hasn't slept since 4 except for a 10-minute nap on the way home around 7:30. We gave we a dose of ibuprofen in the car (first time) in hopes that it would kick and we could put her straight to bed when we got home. Once we got inside, she hasn't wanted to fall asleep at all! I'm worried it was the ibuprofen that had this affect on her.

Just found out Tylenol has high fructose corn syrup and sucralose (similar to Splenda) in it, and the ibuprofen has sucrose (table sugar) in it. Uuugh. Why won't she sleep!?

ETA: She usually has a nap from 5:30-6 and then bed at 8.

JessieAlbin

@MrsW26‌ congrats!!'

janellemj928

Congrats @MrsW26‌! I'm also a bit jealous.

@edoliesmom‌ I'm always afraid something like that will happen. Every time I see a truck with the tailgate down and something in the back I do my best to not be behind it. So glad you are all safe!

@ambarnett1‌ that also sounds scary! Not being able to comfort LO is not a fun time

edoliesmom

3crazykitties said:

Big fight with DH. Not sure how to take some of the things he said. I think a lot of it is from being overworked and stressed but ever since I got KU our relationship is totally different. He is already asleep and I won't be seeing him until after 7 pm tomorrow so all of this gets to fester.

I'm sorry. It's tough to give advice without knowing details, and I'm not the greatest at doing that anyway. Sounds like it's a lot more complicated than just this isolated incident... What time will he get up in the morning? Maybe you could see each other just for 5 or 10 minutes since you both will have slept since then. I don't know what could be said or done, but I would try doing something that can set the tone for the rest of the day without necessarily apologizing, that way you don't have to force something you don't mean, but maybe you'll both feel better throughout the day about seeing each other at the end of the day.

Or maybe I'm being like a dude when all you want to hear is "that sucks" and a >:D<. Take either or both!

tamaraaaa

I've become a lurker and I hate it, but the holidays are the craziest time at work. I'm stopping by to say I don't trust anyone not in RTT. That's my late Friday confession that I'm only sharing with you all. Like, why? Why wouldn't you be here? It's suspect.

deidremaria

@edoliesmom‌ I'm so glad you were able to act quickly and avoid what could have come out of that.

@ambarnett1‌ I can't wait to find out what you're having.

@3crazykitties‌ I'm so sorry about you and your H. Hopefully you guys are able to talk and make sense of the changes in your life.