Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: 1st bday! Because someone had to...
Time to party!! Haha
I have just become ridiculously overwhelmed with the birthday party. DH got a new job and has been mostly uninvolved with any planning except to say that he wanted it big. So we invited 70 people 55 of whom will be there. It is now less than 2 weeks out and I needed to finalize food/entertainment/ a few other decisions. I tried talking to him about it and he lays out this HUGE plan with two catered meals (lunch AND dinner for any one who's still around after 5) and 4, yes FOUR, bounce houses and a huge indoor ball pit with 10000+ balls and cases of alcohol and "why didn't I invite these 3 neighbors (an additional 14ppl) that we literally maybe see 1x a month for a poker game?" And cases/kegs of alcohol only for me to remind him it's on a SUNDAY from
1-4 and then get criticized for making it a Sunday and "well we certainly don't need even a single bounce house now" who has a birthday party on a Sunday? It took 4 hours, Nothing was resolved, and I'm running out of time
Is your husband planning a wedding? Or maybe a kid friendly frat party? All jokes aside. I'm really sorry. That sounds incredibly overwhelming.
Can you sit down with him and make a list of what he considers "must haves" and you do the same? Find a middle ground on the booze. Maybe just wine and beer? Or a signature cocktail? 4(?!) bounce houses seems excessive. So perhaps 1-2 would be ok. Call me crazy, but I think 1 meal will do just fine. I guarantee you'll have leftovers. And honestly, with a time like 1-4 "etiquette" says you don't even have to serve a full meal. Let alone 2.
I hope he calms down and you can figure out the details. It's supposed to be fun, not stressful!
@FTM53
We had ONE bounce house, and the kids MAYBE spent an hour worth of time in it. Maybe. I bought 10-15 items from Dollar Tree like water guns, sidewalk chalk, jump ropes, footballs, hula hoops. They hardly touched any of it. I think they drew with the chalk for about 5 minutes. We also have a ball pit in our house. They were more interested in using about 10 of the balls to throw around. They entertained themselves by creating their own games and running around constantly. Moral of the story - you'd be wasting a lot of money on the 4 houses and ball pit, lol.
I was also convinced my wine/beer drinking friends would kill half a liquor store, if given the opportunity. SO, we bought about 8 bottles of white wine, a few champs, and some reds. We have a kegerator in our backyard and it was loaded with a keg. We threw out some bottled beer in our beverage tubs, too. ONE keg was maybe half gone, some bottles were drank and about half the wine. If that. I feel like you'd also be wasting a lot of money on all that booze. Like you said, it's a Sunday. People aren't going to come to a first birthday, on a Sunday afternoon, with the intent to get liquored up, lo!!
Now, the icing on the cake - literally - I bought two 1/2 sheet cakes from Costco, because they're cheap and I was lead to believe one cake serves about 30 people. Not everyone is over the moon about dessert!! We had an ENTIRE cake left!! My husband also got suckered into about 4 XL pizzas more than we needed, based on he and the pizza worker's calculations on slices per person. You'd DEFINITELY be wasting money planning two catered meals.
Hope some of my experience helps you to make better choices, lol. I'd hate to see you waste a bunch of unnecessary money!!
Question for moms though: Of all the birthday parties you've been to, what makes them most enjoyable for YOU?
We will have cornhole and penny-ante poker for the dudes (we're known as the poker house) and plenty of fun for kiddos, but want to make sure the other moms enjoy themselves, too. I'm thinking wine and plenty of adult seating where kids can be kept an eye on. But anything else?
:::SIGH::: as pissed as I was about that, I looked at the other kids running around in our back yard, stepping in puddles, chasing each other in the pouring rain and thought, that is what it's all about...just go with it! Everyone seemed to have a great time! We sang happy birthday of about 50 ppl huddled under a tent together! Can't get much better....lmao
This little piggy ate the whole smash cake
...and then bathtime after and that smile....lmao
Happy birthday to all the July 2016 babies!! XoXo