I was wondering when the circumcision argument would come up and I'm pretty impressed with the "agree to disagree/do you" vibe this board has on this topic, as I've seen it get super ugly on other boards
I find circumcision to be right in line with parenting decisions like formula vs breastfeeding, co-sleeping vs. crib, cry it out vs. no cry it out. There is evidence for and against circumcision, but in my opinion neither side comes out far enough ahead to make it a clear issue (like, for example, vaccinations), so we just have to make the decision we're comfortable with, and live and let live. Plus, the people who have strong opinions on one side or another are not going to change their minds so arguing is completely pointless. I do love the idea of a thread to discuss the pros and cons of each side for those posters who are currently undecided what route they'll take. Information is power!
No. Just no. The medical community overwhelming supports and defends vaccinations. the other decisions you mention affect the child only, but not vaccinations. The affect everyone around them so NO, DO NOT compare someone's decision to circumcise to be on the same level as deciding to vaccinate.
And it it looks like I need to start a spreadsheet on the crazies already...
Possible QBF. Um, I'm pretty sure what @DobbysSockwas saying is that there is clear medical evidence and support for vaccinations but for the other issues, things aren't as clear. Take a deep breath and calm yourself before you start calling people crazies.
Ohhhhh... Yeah. I see that now. Sorry Dobbysock!
Ill save the spreadsheet though because as the vaccination discussion comes up, and it will,my he crazies will show themselves.
@elenabrent thanks your a gem @melodramatic26 yes you need to calm down because you need to get facts straight before calling people crazy on this board.
@Lindsayleigh1989 I am with you 100% on the porn topic. I am very sorry you are dealing with that and hope your DH can see where you're coming from and you two can get some help! It definitely can be an addiction.
I am making a registry on BRU for the 10% back. If I need something from BRU and/or TRU and cam add it to the registry, I am. I am not even sharing the list, it is all stuff that I plan on buying.
I am making a registry on BRU for the 10% back. If I need something from BRU and/or TRU and cam add it to the registry, I am. I am not even sharing the list, it is all stuff that I plan on buying.
@Lindsayleigh1989 I hear you. I'm sorry that it's been so destructive for you, and I hope that you and your husband can find a way to work through this. The beginning of a marriage, in a lot of ways, sucks. You're trying to figure yourselves out and each other out, and it's stressful and emotional. I can't even imagine doing it pregnant, because it was a struggle for me to get through not pregnant. I will say, at least for me, it was worth it to work through all those little differences. It takes some time and energy and some tears, but the other side is amazing. And if your insurance covers it, get a good couple's therapist. It makes those really horrible hard conversations a lot easier when you have a ref.
Therapists are facilitators, helpers, and can clarify things and help with difficult discussions however we are NOT referees! We can definitely help but we aren't there to pick sides or say who is right or wrong. It's very frustrating when the latter is the expectation because it takes a lot of "undoing" in session if that's the case. Sorry, this is a pet peeve of mine as a therapist that used to work with couples. I do agree with the recommendation for therapy but please don't go in thinking they are a referee!
@fleurdelakeview Sorry! Didn't mean to offend. I should have thought before I casually used the term ref, I definitely didn't mean a therapist should take sides. I meant that it helps to work through a big conversation when someone is there who can help you navigate and sort through what you're saying and what you mean/bypass triggering topics with grace.
Guise... @melodramatic26 misread... She apologized and clarified. @DobbysSock seems okay... Shall we all move on? I know I misread here frequently myself.
I seriously love the people on this bmb. Used to hate you now I love it all. My fffc is 1. I too hate the word nub. It's awful. 2. I really don't believe in the "nub theory" or any of the old wives tales. Am I excited to find out the sex of my baby? Sure! Am I going to post pics and ask people and bug the tech before 18 weeks? No. And when it comes to the a/s finding out my baby has functioning organs and is healthy is WAY more important than finding out the sex. I get ragey when the sex is the only thing people bring up.
FFFC. I think there are way too many kiss asses on this board. First they have their own opinion, and the moment somebody challenges them they immediately change their stance. It ain't gonna make you bump popular.
And if you think this post is about you.... It probably is
On a side note. Any advice on raging pregnancy hormones? I feel like where ever I go I'm ready to stab somebody. My last pregnancy I was SO nice.
Another FFFC - I can't bring myself to reference my husband as "DH" in a post. I will write "my husband" and maybe "hubby" but trying to say "DH" makes me feel really weird and uncomfortable.
Just to clarify, I have no issue with other people doing it, it just feels weird to me and I don't know why.
I'm terrified I'm going to be talking about something wildly inappropriate and sex-related referring to DH and accidentally put DS or DD, and then it's awkward and the police get called.
@Y0urm0m Same here. My first pregnancy, I was so sweet and happy that I probably would've given you a cavity. This one - not so much. My husband thinks it's a prelude to how this kid's personality will be. Our son is sweeter than pie so this one might be Satan.
FFFC #2 - My son has been in bed since 7:15... I definitely watched the first episode of Sofia the First on Disney all by myself. I really wanted to know how she "became a princess overnight"!
Was also watching Brave earlier and ugly cried when the mom fought the big scary bear to protect her daughter. I know how the movie ends... not sure why I was getting all worked up that the mom could die. I guess I was identifying with the mama bear instincts or something.
I need to take a break from children's programming.
My fffc and please flame if you feel the need but I'm not going to fight back because I have no energy emotionally or physically today.
I hate porn and masterbation it's been awful in two of my relationships and has been a constant struggle in my marriage. It is and addiction and hurts others and if people want to tell me it's "normal" or what ever good for you but I'm tired of hurt and pain and lies! Screw you porn industry I'll never live up to you!
Agree 100%! But also from (my) Christian perspective, I think porn is cheating. We also don't masterbate either. DH and I have decided that it is not for us and it not good for our relationship. Plus I'm super jealous and wouldn't want my DH looking at other naked girls. The only naked girl he needs to see is me. And he feels the same way for me. We also don't watch movies that have naked people for this reason. I think we have a healthy sexual relationship without all that. I think the porn industry is a lot of fantasy and I'm worried kids growing up will think it's "normal" and it's not. 50 shades of grey is a prime example of this.
@Lindsayleigh1989 I agree to a certain extent that the porn industry has been rather destructive to women and reinforces a lot of terrible things that can be abusive and detrimental to a relationship. My experience though is that masturbation is healthy and empowering and something I engage in a few times a week. I call it "me time." My husband does not watch or look at porn on a regular basis (I'd say rarely) so my thoughts on porn would probably be a bit different. My sisters boyfriend is constantly looking at porn and it's definitely an issue with them. Porn, in my opinion, can be a great thing in a relationship if both partners respect one another and consent and comfort is first and foremost. I sometimes watch it to get in the mood or read literotica- my husband loves it bc I'll be reading in bed and then pounce on him. Masturbation can be a very empowering and satisfying experience and I'm all for it. But yea, if a guy is doing it all the time and it's replacing intimacy with their partner, I could see how it could become a problem.
First off... @Nerdchild I feel like we are sharing the same brainwaves. You've literally taken my thoughts and turned them into words at least twice on this thread alone. I feel a little creepily infatuated with you at the moment.
Second! I'm all for some masturbation, as long as it's in a healthy setting. We aren't all crazy about it, and usually it only happens on my part when we are starting to BD and DH finishes for me Sometimes I want DH to masturbate and leave me the fudge alone. If I'm not in the mood I'm not going to help you out when you don't return that favor dude. Go take a shower and I'll consider talking to you when you've calmed down!
My fffc and please flame if you feel the need but I'm not going to fight back because I have no energy emotionally or physically today.
I hate porn and masterbation it's been awful in two of my relationships and has been a constant struggle in my marriage. It is and addiction and hurts others and if people want to tell me it's "normal" or what ever good for you but I'm tired of hurt and pain and lies! Screw you porn industry I'll never live up to you!
Agree 100%! But also from (my) Christian perspective, I think porn is cheating. We also don't masterbate either. DH and I have decided that it is not for us and it not good for our relationship. Plus I'm super jealous and wouldn't want my DH looking at other naked girls. The only naked girl he needs to see is me. And he feels the same way for me. We also don't watch movies that have naked people for this reason. I think we have a healthy sexual relationship without all that. I think the porn industry is a lot of fantasy and I'm worried kids growing up will think it's "normal" and it's not. 50 shades of grey is a prime example of this.
One, I think that it's good that you guys both came to that agreement and understanding because it works for you as a couple. However there is no such thing as normal... For some people BDSM or some variance is very normal for some folks. Some people get a lot of satisfaction and gratification from dominant/submissive roles. The porn industry and books like 50 Shages of Grey have actually empowered couples and women to be able to say hey, I'm a sexual being, I have fantasies and desires that maybe aren't what society thinks is normal, but this is what turns me on, this is what doesn't. It's okay for me to know my body, it's not gross or disgusting, we should be comfortable talking about it. Sexuality, especially women's experiences isn't something to be ashamed of.
I love masturbation. I think it can lead to a healthy sexual relationship. In my classes, if I have a chapter on sex and gender, I always include this topic, especially in regards to women, as society in general shames women's sexuality and many women have felt shamed for wanting to have orgasms.
I don't get the hatred on the nub theory. I read the peer reviewed article and it seems like a pretty good theory. I do hate the word nub when applied to baby genitalia though. My husband accidentally chopped off his big toe a few years ago, so when I hear/see nub applied to genitalia, I picture my husbands nub on a baby. Bad/weird mental image.
I agree @PinkLady2015 every couple and individual is going to come up with what they are comfortable with. In the heat of the moment I generalized but I really meant those things in my own relationship where we had made an agreement neither to engage in attempt to break and addiction. My hurt and hate comes from that agreement not being honored and being done with lies and deception instead of just coming to me with what was going on
I truly believe each person has every right to choose their level of sexuality and women need to be more entitled to feeling sexy and focusing on their own desires and needs so I'm not against it( the act)I'm just against what it has caused. I had discovered some things today and uncovered some lies that were really hurtful. We have since talked through things and made new plans to try to be open and honest and support each other. I appreciate you all engaging me in a respectful manner instead of just hating on me
@Y0urm0m I officially hit my crazy bitch hormones yesterday. Oh the insanity. No idea how to curb this crazy train.
I think it's weird when people say they are "trying" to get pregnant, or if someone asks a newly pregnant couple if they were "trying". It's essentially a socially acceptable way to tell everyone you're fucking. Or "were you fucking for fun or fucking with purpose?"
@iamautumn Done! The next time someone asks if we were trying I promise to tell them "We were fucking with purpose!" That's an answer as polite as the question asked
1. I can't stand people that judge others on government assistance, complain about paying so that others can have healthcare, etc. I hope one day you find yourself needing help and you can find out how hard it can be. But, don't worry, I will gladly pay more so that you don't have to be without, or judge your food choices.
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil)
SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil)
Dx:MFI
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794 First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26 FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
1. I can't stand people that judge others on government assistance, complain about paying so that others can have healthcare, etc. I hope one day you find yourself needing help and you can find out how hard it can be. But, don't worry, I will gladly pay more so that you don't have to be without, or judge your food choices.
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
How do you expect for parents to pay for their kids college? My parents made good money but not enough to put three kids through school. College is freaking expensive. I would LOVE to pay for my kids education, will that happen? Probably not. Debt is a part of life.
1. I can't stand people that judge others on government assistance, complain about paying so that others can have healthcare, etc. I hope one day you find yourself needing help and you can find out how hard it can be. But, don't worry, I will gladly pay more so that you don't have to be without, or judge your food choices.
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
Umm people often pay for med school with the hundreds of thousands of dollars lying around? No no they don't. Does that mean my DH shouldn't have gone to med school because his dad who makes $40000 a year couldn't pay for it. He had to do loans for undergrad to.
This is the dumbest thing I have ever heard. So you shouldn't go to college if your parents can't afford to pay for it. Ugh go away!
Re: FFFC
@fleurdelakeview @MamaBish @elenabrent @Lindsayleigh1989 Thanks ladies for the support!
@melodramatic26 No worries, glad I'm off the spreadsheet haha. I'm definitely 100% pro vaccines.
@melodramatic26 yes you need to calm down because you need to get facts straight before calling people crazy on this board.
July BMB May Signature Challenge
I am not even sharing the list, it is all stuff that I plan on buying.
July'16 BMB May Siggy Challenge - Star Wars:
July BMB May Signature Challenge
Married: May 16th 2015
July'16 BMB May Siggy Challenge - Star Wars:
Married: May 16th 2015
My fffc is 1. I too hate the word nub. It's awful. 2. I really don't believe in the "nub theory" or any of the old wives tales. Am I excited to find out the sex of my baby? Sure! Am I going to post pics and ask people and bug the tech before 18 weeks? No. And when it comes to the a/s finding out my baby has functioning organs and is healthy is WAY more important than finding out the sex. I get ragey when the sex is the only thing people bring up.
And if you think this post is about you....
It probably is
On a side note. Any advice on raging pregnancy hormones? I feel like where ever I go I'm ready to stab somebody. My last pregnancy I was SO nice.
July BMB May Signature Challenge
Was also watching Brave earlier and ugly cried when the mom fought the big scary bear to protect her daughter. I know how the movie ends... not sure why I was getting all worked up that the mom could die. I guess I was identifying with the mama bear instincts or something.
I need to take a break from children's programming.
Agree 100%! But also from (my) Christian perspective, I think porn is cheating. We also don't masterbate either. DH and I have decided that it is not for us and it not good for our relationship. Plus I'm super jealous and wouldn't want my DH looking at other naked girls. The only naked girl he needs to see is me. And he feels the same way for me. We also don't watch movies that have naked people for this reason. I think we have a healthy sexual relationship without all that. I think the porn industry is a lot of fantasy and I'm worried kids growing up will think it's "normal" and it's not. 50 shades of grey is a prime example of this.
July BMB May Signature Challenge
My experience though is that masturbation is healthy and empowering and something I engage in a few times a week. I call it "me time." My husband does not watch or look at porn on a regular basis (I'd say rarely) so my thoughts on porn would probably be a bit different. My sisters boyfriend is constantly looking at porn and it's definitely an issue with them.
Porn, in my opinion, can be a great thing in a relationship if both partners respect one another and consent and comfort is first and foremost. I sometimes watch it to get in the mood or read literotica- my husband loves it bc I'll be reading in bed and then pounce on him.
Masturbation can be a very empowering and satisfying experience and I'm all for it.
But yea, if a guy is doing it all the time and it's replacing intimacy with their partner, I could see how it could become a problem.
Second! I'm all for some masturbation, as long as it's in a healthy setting. We aren't all crazy about it, and usually it only happens on my part when we are starting to BD and DH finishes for me
Sometimes I want DH to masturbate and leave me the fudge alone. If I'm not in the mood I'm not going to help you out when you don't return that favor dude. Go take a shower and I'll consider talking to you when you've calmed down!
However there is no such thing as normal... For some people BDSM or some variance is very normal for some folks. Some people get a lot of satisfaction and gratification from dominant/submissive roles. The porn industry and books like 50 Shages of Grey have actually empowered couples and women to be able to say hey, I'm a sexual being, I have fantasies and desires that maybe aren't what society thinks is normal, but this is what turns me on, this is what doesn't. It's okay for me to know my body, it's not gross or disgusting, we should be comfortable talking about it. Sexuality, especially women's experiences isn't something to be ashamed of.
I don't get the hatred on the nub theory. I read the peer reviewed article and it seems like a pretty good theory. I do hate the word nub when applied to baby genitalia though. My husband accidentally chopped off his big toe a few years ago, so when I hear/see nub applied to genitalia, I picture my husbands nub on a baby. Bad/weird mental image.
I truly believe each person has every right to choose their level of sexuality and women need to be more entitled to feeling sexy and focusing on their own desires and needs so I'm not against it( the act)I'm just against what it has caused. I had discovered some things today and uncovered some lies that were really hurtful. We have since talked through things and made new plans to try to be open and honest and support each other. I appreciate you all engaging me in a respectful manner instead of just hating on me
I think it's weird when people say they are "trying" to get pregnant, or if someone asks a newly pregnant couple if they were "trying". It's essentially a socially acceptable way to tell everyone you're fucking. Or "were you fucking for fun or fucking with purpose?"
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26
FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
This is the dumbest thing I have ever heard. So you shouldn't go to college if your parents can't afford to pay for it. Ugh go away!