1. I can't stand people that judge others on government assistance, complain about paying so that others can have healthcare, etc. I hope one day you find yourself needing help and you can find out how hard it can be. But, don't worry, I will gladly pay more so that you don't have to be without, or judge your food choices.
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
---Anticipated QBF---
1. How extraordinarily spiteful this statement is. You wish others to find themselves in need of assistance and/or healthcare? I don't judge those who need assistance whatsoever but am appalled by those abusing the system; the misappropriated funds are not going where they need and ought to go.
2. Lovely idea in theory. Most parents simply cannot do this, as much as they may wish to.
3. I use Siri dictation and an iPhone, both of which are notoriously unreliable due to auttocorrect. Plus, typos happen. You are clearly judging me anyhow so why should I care what you think of my grammar? I have only edited one dictionary for OUP thus far.
I hope to one day be rich enough to agree with you.
Wow you are very out of touch with the realities of this country. I was the first in my family to go to college (and med school) and there is no way my parents could have helped me. I thank them for working their asses off to give me a secure childhood and for encouraging me to do well in school. I think that paying my way through undergrad and having to balance working and school made me the strong person that I am today.
Almost 15% of Americans struggle to even put food in the table, let alone find money for college. I also think that higher education should be free or at least affordable but thats a whole different debate (and might have something to do with my $300K of debt).
@htn1763 my parents did not pay of dine of my 'college ', I paid for every penny. My ADN was debt free thanks to waiting tables. I was married when I went back for my BSN, and that went to my first student loans. They were almost paid off when I started my MSN.
Now my very 'entitled ' dh. His parents sent him to college with no real life skills. His 'job' was at. A grocery store 10 hours a week. He used that money to parry and do drugs. His parents supported his habits until depression pretty much set in and he become suicidal. He quit school (before being kicked out) and went to a tech school. His parents paid for that, but had a Come To Jesus talk with him. He was made to support himself. He finished his AS with a 4.0 and had an amazing career for almost a decade. He is now going back to school for his BS. Guess who is paying for it. We are. He fucked up, he gets to fix it.
Once we are both done with school, we will be fantastic and financially very comfortable. Will I pay for my kids school? Most likely not. Will I help them out? Yes.
They don't have to go to a private school, or get a b.s degree. They need to look at the picture of the whole thing. Aka, wow, I want to be a teacher. I will make 30k (idk, just guessing ) a year. So let me go to a school that I can afford to repay back THAT debt. Not 'hey I will pay 75K for a small liberal art school and get my degree in basic weaving: art and history.'
My job is to guide them, not kiss their ass.
As for issues with Government assistance. My mom worked for the system for 32 years prior to retirement. She can tell how who abused it and how they did and that her hands were tied to stop it, do to Loop wholes and what not. Why there is a very small amount of people the fraud the system, they are real. And they have stolen millions.
Here's hoping that college tuition hits a breaking point and resets in some way before our kids are 18, because at the rate tuition is inflating there's no way I could afford to even put a dent in my kid's educational costs. My parents helped as much as they could, and scholarships helped, but the bulk of the loans are on me. And that's okay, because it was my education that I wanted. That said, the system is out of control and we're asking 18 year olds to decide to saddle themselves with tens of thousands of dollars of debt (or more). I have friends who, ten years out of college, can barely cover both their loans and living expenses. I don't think it's the parent's responsibility but I think we also need to find a better way than sending our young people off into adulthood with debilitating debt.
ETA: There are always going to be people who manipulate the system, but they aren't the majority . And I mostly try and focus on the people that these benefits help, and even though I know it is not the most efficient system (or government), I'm glad that my taxes go, in some parts, to helping those that need a leg up.
I never said parents should pay for med school. I said college. After that kids are better prepared to pay for further schooling on their own. I was able to go to law school (paid on my own) because I didn't have undergrad debt. It's a gift and I intend to pass that gift on to my children.
College is expensive. That's why we started saving when our kid was born with the 529. I don't expect them to take out loans. if I need a loan for their tuition, I will take it out. It's just a sacrifice I'm willing to make for my children. However, if my kid is messing around in school And failing classes, they will start paying.
Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil)
SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil)
Dx:MFI
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794 First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26 FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
I never said parents should pay for med school. I said college. After that kids are better prepared to pay for further schooling on their own. I was able to go to law school (paid on my own) because I didn't have undergrad debt. It's a gift and I intend to pass that gift on to my children.
College is expensive. That's why we started saving when our kid was born with the 529. I don't expect them to take out loans. if I need a loan for their tuition, I will take it out. It's just a sacrifice I'm willing to make for my children. However, if my kid is messing around in school And failing classes, they will start paying.
How nice for you. Many of us don't have that option.
I think it's ridiculous that people force their 18 year old to choose a career regardless of if they are ready or even care at that point. I can't tell you how many kids whose parents were paying just didn't give a sh*t. They wasted time and money because they probably shouldn't have been forced to go to college.
I think it should be up to the individuals. If your kid has a good head on their shoulders and is mature enough, sure, help them pay. If your kid breezes through and doesn't care about going to class or actually trying, nope.
I think it's ridiculous that people force their 18 year old to choose a career regardless of if they are ready or even care at that point. I can't tell you how many kids whose parents were paying just didn't give a sh*t. They wasted time and money because they probably shouldn't have been forced to go to college.
I think it should be up to the individuals. If your kid has a good head on their shoulders and is mature enough, sure, help them pay. If your kid breezes through and doesn't care about going to class or actually trying, nope.
I agree. I was ready and I took it seriously, but my same age cousin wasn't. He fucked around, got drunk, and ended up dropping out after freshman year. He worked for a year and figured out what he wanted, and then went back and kicked ass.
I think that we should be realistic with high schoolers about their options. If college is the right fit, great! If it's not right now, that's okay too. There's no one size fits all solution for higher education.
htn1763 it's just that; a gift. Not something that parents should have to or should shell out for their children.
I'm appalled that you think just because someone's parents paid for their higher education suggests that they will be in the same income/tax bracket to allow them to pay for their child's education. And this is coming from someone who's father was able to graciously pay for my college tuition.
@dolewhipper I'm guessing it's a fact that if your parents paid for your education that you're more likely to pay for your kids. Obviously there are exceptions. Pretty weird thing to be appalled by.
Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil)
SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil)
Dx:MFI
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794 First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26 FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
@ButterMyBiscuit it's a cycle. If your parents didn't pay for you, you're likely not able to pay for your children.
This is an ignorant statement. Isn't the goal of parenting to create a better life for your child than you had. Good parents are always doing their best and whatever they can to support their children.
When I went to college, my parents had just declared bankruptcy (not because they were behind on their bills, but living paycheck to paycheck without handouts was getting impossible for them so it was the best decision, which ultimately is beside the point). However, because of this, they didn't qualify for a loan. Therefore, I paid for my school myself. My parents did allow me to live with them while I went to school and fed me, which of course helped me. However, it never crossed my mind that they were obligated to pay for anything and I don't think any less of them for not having the ability to. They helped me where they could, and that is what is important.
You went from your first statement saying people shouldn't judge for affordable healthcare and then go to tell people how they should parent (in one aspect) in the next. Then continue to judge those who argue some parents aren't able to. It's baffling.
Go ahead and judge me for poor grammar.
End rant
Me: 32, DH: 38
Married 1/14/12
NTNP Since 12/13, TTC Since 1/15
BFP: 11/4/15 Found out we were having TWINS 12/9/15 EDD: 7/11/16 Born: 6/29/16
@dolewhipper I'm guessing it's a fact that if your parents paid for your education that you're more likely to pay for your kids. Obviously there are exceptions. Pretty weird thing to be appalled by.
I'm appalled because it's coming from a very elitist standpoint. H and I have discussed enrollment of the FL Prepaid college fund but are not in a place to do that for a few years, and probably will not if we choose for me to be a SAHM.
@ButterMyBiscuit it's a cycle. If your parents didn't pay for you, you're likely not able to pay for your children.
Sure, fair enough. That may be true in some cases. But didn't you also just vouch for people who need government assistance? Isn't financial aid a form of government assistance? I feel like your logic is flawed.
My parents could not afford school. This is why I am back in school at 29. The biggest reason? To set an example for my child and to strive to provide a better life for him and this baby inside of me. Will I be able to pay for their education? Maybe, maybe not. Will that stop me from encouraging them to go and helping where I can? Hell no.
My dad paid for a semester, I failed out because not my money. I go back and pay I take college 100% seriously because it's my loans. I know professors that hate teaching kids under the age of 21 because they don't take college seriously. I also don't think we need to create a society based on entitlement. There is no reason you kid can't have loans or look up grants. It's called teaching them to be an adult.
I think it's her pompous and condescending tone I don't like. Saying because my parents didn't pay for college they're bad parents or I'm going to be one because I'm going to do the same
@htn1763 I find that statement horribly offensive. So your theory is that because my parents didn't pay for me to go to college, I can't possibly make enough money to send my kid to college? I put myself through college and grad school, because I paid for everything myself I feel I had a deeper respect for college because I understood the cost of everything. My plan is help my children attend college if they choose to attend, but under no circumstances do I feel that I am required to pay for college.
FYI my husband and I got jobs straight out of school, saved our money, bought a home at 23, paid off all student loans by 26, and are completely financially stable. It's really a shame my parents didn't pay for college.
I'm not putting anyone down for not being able to pay (Also, think everyone is entitled to their own opinion and enjoy a good debate. I haven't told anyone that they are dumb or to gtfo like others have). I just think it's a cycle and it's a gift I believe parents should give their kids. If you are only in a position to help x amount, then do it. Hopefully that means your child we be in a position to help xx when their time comes.
Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil)
SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil)
Dx:MFI
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794 First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26 FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
the better gift would be teaching your kid the value of hard work and being treated like an adult, not mommy and daddy are going to take care of you for the rest of your life.
Someone sure seems entitled @htn1763. Sorry my parents worked for nonprofits and didn't make a ton of money so yes I had to pay for my own college and still working on it and I chose a career to serve those on the welfare system so guess what there is no way I am going to be able to pay for my kids undergrad.
Not everyone makes tons of money and can afford that. Also how do you propose all those on the system pay for their kids college or is that just the "cycle" you speak of. While you may not have outwardly or directly insulted but sure have judged us for not being able to do that. So feel free to go stick your nose up somewhere else if us commoners with poor grammar and lack of hundreds of thousands of dollars lying around to pay for our kids are not appealing to you.
I got my B.A. with grants and scholarships, which makes me better than NO ONE else, my mom mentally beat my butt throughout high school to make sure I could warrant those scholarships, and it only worked because I was afraid enough of my mother. Tutors, summer school, retaking classes I had passed(but not well enough) and being involved in MULTIPLE extracurriculars.
Mind you, this is the same woman who made sure I could read, write, do addition/subtraction/multiplication/division, tell time on a clock, differentiate and know how to use paper and coin money (and count back change in my head), all by the time I entered preschool at four.
Most importantly, my mother taught me how to dream and how to fight for myself. When all of the kids in my preschool class wanted to be 'fiowfightahs' and 'balleninas', I wanted to be 'The first brain surgeon to complete a successful human to human brain transplant'. That dream stuck until I was enrolled in my first anthropology class, at which point my mom kept right on supporting me.
Oh, wait, my (absolutely wonderful and equally supportive) dad was dying of stage 4 lung cancer, so damn her for not being Mommy Warbucks and being gracious enough to foot the bill. That's why I had to take out loans to get my 3.95 in my M.A. for Medical Anthropology, mommy is a steaming pile of crap. Wahhhhh.
Bye Felicia.
ETA: We definitely need 'Fiowfightahs' and we enjoy watching 'balleninas', nothing against those dreams, but my astounded family had no idea how I had even figured out what a brain surgeon was/did. You want psuedo-evidence of past lives/old souls/dead people living in your children, I was your prime specimen (yes, I have ALWAYS been this freaking weird).
My grandparents could pay for my college 4 times over because of the amount of rich they are, I'm talking about money burried in the back yard rich. They told me to adult up because they were self made. I respect that so much more than the twit one of my husband's friend's married, who's parents paid for her college. She's the biggest, self entitled cow I know.
Confession: we could afford to save for our child's college and have already decided we won't. I firmly believe in raising hard-working, independent humans who don't have the option of being entitled. I won't be buying them a car either. I got scholarships, worked full-time, and have a reasonable loan. It made me seriously consider what I was doing with my life and get a degree that would be useful. I also think some struggle builds character and learning to stretch a dollar and hustle for what you want is important. I don't presume to tell anyone else what to do with their money or their children, but just saying ours will be getting jobs to buy things they want, moving out at 18 without the option of returning home, and investing in their own futures and learning to bet on themselves. We intend to help and guide but not to dole out cash, spoon-feed or coddle. My goal is to have 20-something's who are proud of their accomplishments, confident in their abilities, and who consider themselves full-grown adults and not second stage teenagers.
I'm not putting anyone down for not being able to pay (Also, think everyone is entitled to their own opinion and enjoy a good debate. I haven't told anyone that they are dumb or to gtfo like others have). I just think it's a cycle and it's a gift I believe parents should give their kids. If you are only in a position to help x amount, then do it. Hopefully that means your child we be in a position to help xx when their time comes.
I'm glad to hear you enjoy a good debate (assuming you're an attorney as you stated you attended law school.)
That's wonderful that a 529 plan works for your family. My suggestion is that you take yet another course on estate and trust law. Perhaps you will see that although a 529 might be beneficial to most, it certainly is not the best plan for all.
Sigh. I will be taking advice from my own attorney who knows my finances, not from you.
Funny that for someone who comes across as such an elitist, you are assuming none of the hypothetical children have trusts that will cover their education rendering their parents' funding unnecessary.
I was extremely lucky that my parents were able and willing to pay for my college. I also worked hard through high school and college, earned scholarships, and chose a very reasonable in state school that offered me enough to make it affordable for my parents. I realize how extremely lucky I am and how generous my parents were, and I would never assume that they owed it to me or that they were doing their duty as parents by paying.
My husband went to two years of county college before finishing at a 4 year school and paid for everything himself. He worked full time through college and we were able to pay off his loans a few years ago. We bought our house at 25 and have continued to work our asses off.
We both worked hard and appreciated what we had. I would love to help pay for my child's college education, assuming they are ready, mature, and really want to go to college and make it worth it. My husband is a big advocate for having them spend time at a county school to help them find out what they really want and then expecting them to work and pay for the majority of their schooling.
In the end, it will depend on our child, the state of higher education when the time comes, and what we can afford. I don't think it is any parent's responsibility to pay and I do not think its a good idea for every family. Make the choices that work for you and for your family. The end.
1. I can't stand people that judge others on government assistance, complain about paying so that others can have healthcare, etc. I hope one day you find yourself needing help and you can find out how hard it can be. But, don't worry, I will gladly pay more so that you don't have to be without, or judge your food choices.
2. I think parents should pay for their children's college education (assuming that is the choice they make). I can't imagine saddling a child of 21 or 22 with that kind of debt.
3. I will judge you for poor spelling and bad grammar.
Could you have maybe said something along the lines of, "I think it is a tremendous gift for parents to help their children through college and/or graduate school?" There's a significant part of the country that has an average family income of $50,000. Spending $10k-$20k per year for those families would be damn near impossible.
I'm not putting anyone down for not being able to pay (Also, think everyone is entitled to their own opinion and enjoy a good debate. I haven't told anyone that they are dumb or to gtfo like others have). I just think it's a cycle and it's a gift I believe parents should give their kids. If you are only in a position to help x amount, then do it. Hopefully that means your child we be in a position to help xx when their time comes.
How is it a gift if I am required to pay for my children's college? It isn't a cycle. My parents did. It go to college. My mom was the first to get a HS degree. My sister is the first for a bachelor's, then my mom. My mom got her BA when when I was an RN and married. Then I got my BS. I am the first person in my family to go to graduate school. My children are in private school now. I pay for that. That I their 'gift'. It will give them the discipline and academic skills for college, if that is their desire.
A sense of entitlement has never helped anyone.
If I pay for their college, big if, it will be once they are done. They won't know under graduation day when/if I tell them that I am covering their loans. Then it will be a gift. And one they deserved and worked for.
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
Me: 33 DH: 32 SA#1 low count (6mil)
SA#2- now in IUI range!(30mil)
Dx:MFI
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794 First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26 FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
What was the record we hit in responses... Like 300 a few weeks ago.... Me thinks this is about to trump that one :::::grabs popcorn::::
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
Have you watched the news in the last 5 or so years? Do you know what the average American has in 'savings' today? Or saved per pay check?
Zero. The average American barely lives paycheck to paycheck. People have to decide between bills and food or a Christmas.
I think you must live in a completely different planet then me.
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
Oh look at all your condescension. Might be time for you to leave. Bye!
@BostonBaby1 where did I say everyone should start a 529?? I simply said we did. You could save your money under your mattress for all I care. I think you could use another class in reading comprehension.
Oh look at all your condescension. Might be time for you to leave. Bye!
Wait wait, is it bad to use this twice in as many days?
Re: FFFC
1. How extraordinarily spiteful this statement is. You wish others to find themselves in need of assistance and/or healthcare? I don't judge those who need assistance whatsoever but am appalled by those abusing the system; the misappropriated funds are not going where they need and ought to go.
2. Lovely idea in theory. Most parents simply cannot do this, as much as they may wish to.
3. I use Siri dictation and an iPhone, both of which are notoriously unreliable due to auttocorrect. Plus, typos happen. You are clearly judging me anyhow so why should I care what you think of my grammar? I have only edited one dictionary for OUP thus far.
I hope to one day be rich enough to agree with you.
Wow you are very out of touch with the realities of this country. I was the first in my family to go to college (and med school) and there is no way my parents could have helped me. I thank them for working their asses off to give me a secure childhood and for encouraging me to do well in school. I think that paying my way through undergrad and having to balance working and school made me the strong person that I am today.
Almost 15% of Americans struggle to even put food in the table, let alone find money for college. I also think that higher education should be free or at least affordable but thats a whole different debate (and might have something to do with my $300K of debt).
Married: May 16th 2015
Now my very 'entitled ' dh. His parents sent him to college with no real life skills. His 'job' was at. A grocery store 10 hours a week. He used that money to parry and do drugs. His parents supported his habits until depression pretty much set in and he become suicidal. He quit school (before being kicked out) and went to a tech school. His parents paid for that, but had a Come To Jesus talk with him. He was made to support himself. He finished his AS with a 4.0 and had an amazing career for almost a decade. He is now going back to school for his BS. Guess who is paying for it. We are. He fucked up, he gets to fix it.
Once we are both done with school, we will be fantastic and financially very comfortable. Will I pay for my kids school? Most likely not. Will I help them out? Yes.
They don't have to go to a private school, or get a b.s degree. They need to look at the picture of the whole thing. Aka, wow, I want to be a teacher. I will make 30k (idk, just guessing ) a year. So let me go to a school that I can afford to repay back THAT debt. Not 'hey I will pay 75K for a small liberal art school and get my degree in basic weaving: art and history.'
My job is to guide them, not kiss their ass.
As for issues with Government assistance. My mom worked for the system for 32 years prior to retirement. She can tell how who abused it and how they did and that her hands were tied to stop it, do to Loop wholes and what not.
Why there is a very small amount of people the fraud the system, they are real. And they have stolen millions.
ETA: There are always going to be people who manipulate the system, but they aren't the majority . And I mostly try and focus on the people that these benefits help, and even though I know it is not the most efficient system (or government), I'm glad that my taxes go, in some parts, to helping those that need a leg up.
(paid on my own) because I didn't have undergrad debt. It's a gift and I intend to pass that gift on to my children.
College is expensive. That's why we started saving when our kid was born with the 529. I don't expect them to take out loans. if I need a loan for their tuition, I will take it out. It's just a sacrifice I'm willing to make for my children. However, if my kid is messing around in school And failing classes, they will start paying.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
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FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
July BMB May Signature Challenge
I think it should be up to the individuals. If your kid has a good head on their shoulders and is mature enough, sure, help them pay. If your kid breezes through and doesn't care about going to class or actually trying, nope.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26
FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
I think that we should be realistic with high schoolers about their options. If college is the right fit, great! If it's not right now, that's okay too. There's no one size fits all solution for higher education.
I'm appalled that you think just because someone's parents paid for their higher education suggests that they will be in the same income/tax bracket to allow them to pay for their child's education. And this is coming from someone who's father was able to graciously pay for my college tuition.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26
FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
When I went to college, my parents had just declared bankruptcy (not because they were behind on their bills, but living paycheck to paycheck without handouts was getting impossible for them so it was the best decision, which ultimately is beside the point). However, because of this, they didn't qualify for a loan. Therefore, I paid for my school myself. My parents did allow me to live with them while I went to school and fed me, which of course helped me. However, it never crossed my mind that they were obligated to pay for anything and I don't think any less of them for not having the ability to. They helped me where they could, and that is what is important.
You went from your first statement saying people shouldn't judge for affordable healthcare and then go to tell people how they should parent (in one aspect) in the next. Then continue to judge those who argue some parents aren't able to. It's baffling.
Go ahead and judge me for poor grammar.
End rant
My parents could not afford school. This is why I am back in school at 29. The biggest reason? To set an example for my child and to strive to provide a better life for him and this baby inside of me. Will I be able to pay for their education? Maybe, maybe not. Will that stop me from encouraging them to go and helping where I can? Hell no.
July BMB May Signature Challenge
I think it's her pompous and condescending tone I don't like. Saying because my parents didn't pay for college they're bad parents or I'm going to be one because I'm going to do the same
Married: May 16th 2015
FYI my husband and I got jobs straight out of school, saved our money, bought a home at 23, paid off all student loans by 26, and are completely financially stable. It's really a shame my parents didn't pay for college.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26
FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
Married: May 16th 2015
Not everyone makes tons of money and can afford that. Also how do you propose all those on the system pay for their kids college or is that just the "cycle" you speak of. While you may not have outwardly or directly insulted but sure have judged us for not being able to do that. So feel free to go stick your nose up somewhere else if us commoners with poor grammar and lack of hundreds of thousands of dollars lying around to pay for our kids are not appealing to you.
Mind you, this is the same woman who made sure I could read, write, do addition/subtraction/multiplication/division, tell time on a clock, differentiate and know how to use paper and coin money (and count back change in my head), all by the time I entered preschool at four.
Most importantly, my mother taught me how to dream and how to fight for myself. When all of the kids in my preschool class wanted to be 'fiowfightahs' and 'balleninas', I wanted to be 'The first brain surgeon to complete a successful human to human brain transplant'. That dream stuck until I was enrolled in my first anthropology class, at which point my mom kept right on supporting me.
Oh, wait, my (absolutely wonderful and equally supportive) dad was dying of stage 4 lung cancer, so damn her for not being Mommy Warbucks and being gracious enough to foot the bill. That's why I had to take out loans to get my 3.95 in my M.A. for Medical Anthropology, mommy is a steaming pile of crap. Wahhhhh.
Bye Felicia.
ETA: We definitely need 'Fiowfightahs' and we enjoy watching 'balleninas', nothing against those dreams, but my astounded family had no idea how I had even figured out what a brain surgeon was/did. You want psuedo-evidence of past lives/old souls/dead people living in your children, I was your prime specimen (yes, I have ALWAYS been this freaking weird).
Married: May 16th 2015
That's wonderful that a 529 plan works for your family. My suggestion is that you take yet another course on estate and trust law. Perhaps you will see that although a 529 might be beneficial to most, it certainly is not the best plan for all.
Sigh. I will be taking advice from my own attorney who knows my finances, not from you.
Funny that for someone who comes across as such an elitist, you are assuming none of the hypothetical children have trusts that will cover their education rendering their parents' funding unnecessary.
My husband went to two years of county college before finishing at a 4 year school and paid for everything himself. He worked full time through college and we were able to pay off his loans a few years ago. We bought our house at 25 and have continued to work our asses off.
We both worked hard and appreciated what we had. I would love to help pay for my child's college education, assuming they are ready, mature, and really want to go to college and make it worth it. My husband is a big advocate for having them spend time at a county school to help them find out what they really want and then expecting them to work and pay for the majority of their schooling.
In the end, it will depend on our child, the state of higher education when the time comes, and what we can afford. I don't think it is any parent's responsibility to pay and I do not think its a good idea for every family. Make the choices that work for you and for your family. The end.
Married: October 23, 2010
DS: 8/7/2013
#2 EDD: 6/29/2016, C Section: 6/22/2016
It isn't a cycle. My parents did. It go to college. My mom was the first to get a HS degree. My sister is the first for a bachelor's, then my mom. My mom got her BA when when I was an RN and married. Then I got my BS. I am the first person in my family to go to graduate school. My children are in private school now. I pay for that. That I their 'gift'. It will give them the discipline and academic skills for college, if that is their desire.
A sense of entitlement has never helped anyone.
If I pay for their college, big if, it will be once they are done. They won't know under graduation day when/if I tell them that I am covering their loans. Then it will be a gift. And one they deserved and worked for.
11/1- IUI#1,12/1- IUI#2, 1/2- IUI#3 all BFFN
IVF#1. Long Lupron.ER 3/8 10R,4M,5F. ET 3/3-one 1AB, 2 frosties 5dp5dt-BFP!! Beta 3/25-794 Beta 3/27- 1794
First u/s 4/8 saw hb. 4/22 missed mc 8w3d. d&c 4/26
FET #1- bcp start 6/9. ET 7/12. 2 perfect blasts.5dpt-BFP!!
July BMB May Signature Challenge
Zero. The average American barely lives paycheck to paycheck.
People have to decide between bills and food or a Christmas.
I think you must live in a completely different planet then me.
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