@kfrob for my friend's wedding, she specifically requested certain attire for certain events, and certain colors to match the wedding (because there was coordinated dances and stuff.) Some events western attire was okay, some she requested saris. Just ask!
@kfrob I would ask. My friends Big Fat Indian Wedding was very traditional, but half the people going were not indian, and wore american style clothing. I would say wear a color if you can as thats more respectful than black, but you generally dont need to wear a sari unless specified.
@chyvie and @rc-cola Thank you!! Google told me to be colorful and respectful of fitted clothes. I think I'm going to have to pick up a new dress! We only got invited to a portion, the actual wedding ceremony and the luncheon following. We work with the groom (I've never met the bride) so I will check with him.
@KFrob I don’t know if this is a thing or not, but I’d say maybe don’t wear red, if you can help it? I haven’t personally been to any Indian weddings, but I believe the bride usually or sometimes wears a red dress instead of the American traditional white dress, so I don’t know if guests wearing red is kind of taboo like wearing white to an American wedding?
@sammierose464 let me know if you want a remote buddy for that post-baby workout program! I'm so much better on programs and always looking for a fun new one!
@KFrob I went to one last year, but only to the reception. Most people wore saris but those of us who didn’t wore colored dresses...I think mine was blue. We didn’t go to the ceremony because I wasn’t familiar with the culture and didn’t want to be disrespectful. But the reception was pretty split between traditional dresses and dresses I would normally see at an American wedding. If it were me I would use it as a good excuse to buy a new dress
Re: weight gain-again, don't stress about the numbers and let your doctor tell you if it's too much/little. I lost a lot first trimester and then a month ago with a stomach bug, and my Dr hasn't been concerned, except most recently at my 20W appt. Basically, he was only concerned if by my next appt (this Friday) I hadn't managed to gain weight back or I didn't get my appetite back. Which I have on both accounts, so I think I'm good!
Yes, the brides traditionally wear red. I don't know if it's a faux paus to wear the same color as the bride like here, but couldn't hurt to avoid it. Also white is a no-no for celebrations. Indians traditionally wear white to funerals. That is the extent of my knowledge of the culture though.
Warning about Indian weddings: they are LONG!!! Like everything about them is long. So definitely eat before you go and then you can have a second lunch after the ceremony.
Brain fog strikes again: I thought for sure that I had washed and dried DF's work pants for him but I realized at 4:15 am when he was supposed to be at work at 4:30 that I had dried the wrong pair of pants. Ugh. Thankfully I managed to find him a good clean pair of jeans to wear but that could have been a disaster.
Ladybug - April 2013 Dandelion - October 2018 Angel "Aurora" - July 2020 Angel "Sawyer" - May 2021 Angel "Maxine" - January 2022 Angel "Violet" - March 2022 Baby Dove due March 2023
Went to BRU yesterday and picked up a few baby clothes since it's so on sale (I was trying to wait until after the showers but I can't pass up a sale). A few of the pieces just had some handwritten prices on it, I think because it was meant to be a set and got mismatched. So when I was paying, the teenage kid just didn't care, and since it wasn't scannable he was just like "eh whatever" and threw them in the bag. Granted they were like $1.50 each, but still, I was excited.
I took a page out of @mytrueloves book and have a very large google doc now of 'Things to do' and 'Things to buy' for the next 4 months to prepare for baby, and checking those bad boys off has been SO SATISFYING. Also, it makes me do some of it now vs waiting
Do you remember where @mytrueloves posted her lists? I remember seeing them and thinking oh ok I will come back to this and of course now I can’t find the post.
I really hope to sit and make lists tomorrow! I am an odd version of chaos organized and I love lists though my life does not look like I am a list person!
I have no clue where it was originally posted but someone recently said they knew another mom due in October who gave birth over the previous weekend and the baby was 1 pound but seemed to be ok at the time. Wondering and hoping whoever posted that has a positive update they can share on the baby (and mom’s) progress.
Y’all, please do yourselves a favor and don’t watch the news tonight. Hearing the sound clips of those babies being taken away from their parents is simply unbearable and I’m inconsolable enough for our entire group. Trust me.
I feel so much better about my sorority house. Our handy man came and looked and thinks the water mostly came in from our back porch, we only had about 6in of water, and everything looks ok. We don't think we will even file an insurance claim. Others are definitely not as lucky.
@sliztee I can’t even look at the pictures that go with the news articles. It feels like when he first announced the travel ban. I don’t know who to give my money to, but I desperately need a way to help. Need to do more research on it tomorrow. Suggestions appreciated.
So I just want to put this out there because it’s been on my mind. Maybe it belongs in the new Moms advice, idk.
I (like a lot of you) am a super organized person who is pretty Type A. I make do to lists, I’m a planner, everything has a place, all the things.
Prior to DS I was so OCD about every baby item, what I had, what i wanted, where it went, how it went. After DS was born I tried to continue this and it (along with many other things) took a toll on me.
Anyways, my reason for saying this is simply to say that after baby is born it is okay to back Away from the list making and organizing. It’s impossible to plan everything with a baby and it’s not worth the stress! You, your baby, your sleep/rest and your happiness are most important. Everyone of you is a super women regardless!
I also tend to be super organized and on top of things, but I have already been trying to make a conscious choice to let some of that go. Trying to make everything go the way I think it should is super stressful.
One of my friends who is helping organize a baby shower for me was shocked when she asked if I wanted to be involved in any of the decision making, and I said no. I’d given her my guest list, agreed on the date, and was willing to answer any questions, but I didn’t want to be in charge. She and the other friend organizing are more than capable. (We’ll see how long my hands off lasts, but I’m pretty sure I can make it...)
@sammierose464 I’m glad you got good news about the house! I was thinking of you when I saw more pics on the news last night. So much of the town is devastated!
@estellegetty same. It make me physically nauseated. I cannot watch any of it more without feeling sick and hopeless and so incredibly angry. I also have been donating to the ACLU
@rabtaido1214 that was me! The last update I received was that Mom and baby are doing well for now! He has a fight ahead of him for sure, but everyone is hopeful. I'll try to get an update this week and keep you all posted!
Apparently she called her boss a few days after he was born worried about work, bless her. Her boss was like um no, you're on mat leave now! Don't worry about work!!
For all those donating to the ACLU: they are awesome and that’s wonderful but they have SO much money (especially for imm). Definitely donate to them if you feel strongly about it but otherwise I recommend finding local immigration advocacy organizations in your city/state. I’m happy to give state specific suggestions if anyone wants to PM me. Also ACLU does super important big picture work (we call it ‘impact’ in the biz) but a lot of the smaller orgs (which often get looked over for funding) work more directly with people on the ground. Both are important!
@sliztee I can’t even look at the pictures that go with the news articles. It feels like when he first announced the travel ban. I don’t know who to give my money to, but I desperately need a way to help. Need to do more research on it tomorrow. Suggestions appreciated.
@DunkinDecaf you could check out togetherrising.org I have donated through this group for other things and this as well, mostly because they seem to really do their research and to be transparent about where the money is going and what they are doing (at least as far as I have been able to tell from my research).
I am sure there are others helping as well, but it is one option to check out.
I’m a long time supporter of the ACLU, and absolutely support donating to them (especially if you are concerned about fraudulent organizations, which is a big concern especially around hot button issues). That said, they have a wide portfolio of concerns, and if you want to make sure your donations go directly to supporting immigrant families, then it is worth finding a dedicated non-profit organization.
I’m a long time supporter of the ACLU, and absolutely support donating to them (especially if you are concerned about fraudulent organizations, which is a big concern especially around hot button issues). That said, they have a wide portfolio of concerns, and if you want to make sure your donations go directly to supporting immigrant families, then it is worth finding a dedicated non-profit organization.
See, thats where I am at. I have seen so many people for various things donate to a good cause when really its BS (aka no one should ever donate to the Humane Society of the United States- HSUS- they are a horrible organization and almost no money actually goes to shelters, it all goes to lobbyist groups and they have been in trouble for some borderline terroristic practices). At least with the ACLU I support a bunch of their concerns. But if anyone has any more reputable groups I am definitely open to spreading the love.
Re: Randoms 6/15
Just ask!
Indian weddings are beautiful. The one I went to I just wore something I'd wear to an American wedding. However, I agree with dressing colorful.
Dandelion - October 2018
Angel "Aurora" - July 2020
Angel "Sawyer" - May 2021
Angel "Maxine" - January 2022
Angel "Violet" - March 2022
Baby Dove due March 2023
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/comment/90661591#Comment_90661591
(If you're curious check this out, it's insane: https://www.facebook.com/CCStormDamage2018/ )
I (like a lot of you) am a super organized person who is pretty Type A. I make do to lists, I’m a planner, everything has a place, all the things.
Prior to DS I was so OCD about every baby item, what I had, what i wanted, where it went, how it went. After DS was born I tried to continue this and it (along with many other things) took a toll on me.
Anyways, my reason for saying this is simply to say that after baby is born it is okay to
back Away from the list making and organizing. It’s impossible to plan everything with a baby and it’s not worth the stress! You, your baby, your sleep/rest and your happiness are most important. Everyone of you is a super women regardless!
I also tend to be super organized and on top of things, but I have already been trying to make a conscious choice to let some of that go. Trying to make everything go the way I think it should is super stressful.
One of my friends who is helping organize a baby shower for me was shocked when she asked if I wanted to be involved in any of the decision making, and I said no. I’d given her my guest list, agreed on the date, and was willing to answer any questions, but I didn’t want to be in charge. She and the other friend organizing are more than capable. (We’ll see how long my hands off lasts, but I’m pretty sure I can make it...)
helpless.
Apparently she called her boss a few days after he was born worried about work, bless her. Her boss was like um no, you're on mat leave now! Don't worry about work!!
I’m a long time supporter of the ACLU, and absolutely support donating to them (especially if you are concerned about fraudulent organizations, which is a big concern especially around hot button issues). That said, they have a wide portfolio of concerns, and if you want to make sure your donations go directly to supporting immigrant families, then it is worth finding a dedicated non-profit organization.
We did decide today that we are still going up there in 2 weeks as the community needs the tourism.
But I am 100% open to hearing about smaller/local organizations that need funding.