Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Names
MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
DS born 9/13/16
BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
I have never heard Talia spoken until DH suggested it. He pronounced it Tuh-leah, which I liked. And I think Google agreed with him, but I always had thought it was said as Tal-yuh, again having never heard it. But is Malia said as Muh-leah? Because then I'm more likely to think DH could be right, lol.
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Whereas Talia I would put emphasis on the first syllable like Dahlia.
Malia I remember hearing pronounced Muh-LEE-ah, with the emphasis on the second syllable, and even reading it I'd pronounce it that way. I have no idea why.
MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
DS born 9/13/16
BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
See, now I'm all confused, two reasons. 1-Malia is spelled just like Talia, and it's muh-LEE-uh, so why wouldn't it be tuh-LEE-uh? Also, Google...
Sigh.
DH: 32
Married 7/18/15
1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
Team green turned BLUE!
2nd born at 38+6 on 8/30/18
Team green turned PINK!
Due with #3 on 6/6/20 Team Green
Also, due to her name being classic and still used, in her homeschool class there is another girl with her name... I said you can go by first name shortened middle name (the shortened middle name sounds like 1 letter) or you can go by first name last initial. She picked the second by herself and I think thinks it's cool that there's another girl with her name!!! Apparently, the teachers just called her and the other girl just by first name and they figured out who they were talking too.
Daughter #2 - Oct 2014
Daughter #3 - Nov 2016
Baby #4 - Sept 2018
MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
DS born 9/13/16
BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
So, simple classic easy to spell and pronounce girl name suggestions? I’ll start googling later. We had the baby name app but couldn’t get them to link. Maybe we’ll try again tonight.
We chose Kate for dd, Anna as a back up but now can’t use it. Brooke was the current winner, dh said he likes Mary but I just don’t. Sara was too plain for dh. Last name sounds like Haddock
bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"
bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis
bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"
**Psalm 139:16**
Maria is a very common name. Sub out one letter to get Malia, plus R and L are alveolar consonants that sound similar. People will rely on the pronunciation they know from Maria.
For me, Talia reminds me of Dahlia. Linguistically, T and D sounds are both stop consonants made in the same mouth position so it sounds natural to my ear to match Talia with a word I already know, Dahlia.
Married Aug. 2013
TTC #1 Sep. 2016
***TW***
BFP Jun. 5, 2017; MMC Aug. 2, 2017 at 11w6d
BFP Nov. 20, 2017; ended in CP
All the tests. Everything normal except treated for ureaplasma and DH potentially has high DNAF.
BFP Dec. 25, 2017; EDD Sep. 5, 2018; DD arrived Aug. 26th
My chart: https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/63f71d
Elizabeth is dd’s middle name
Brooke is simple, spelled easy and common but not super common. Mary is dh’s style, not mine. Mine is much less “normal”. I picked out Azure Jocelyn(my middle name) back in gradr school and still love it, with Clairity as a runner uo because I like the sound of Charity but not the nickname Char. Oh and I love Lydia.
Dh is a no-go for all of those except maybe Azure as a middle name.
DH has a common girl’s name that also has multiple spelling variations, no middle name, and a complex last name. He’s a bit bitter over his parent’s choices to this day. Hence our stipulations.
bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"
bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis
bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"
**Psalm 139:16**
So:
Jane
Georgia
Emma
Elinor
Caroline
Lucy
Maria (I think they say it as Mariah)
Ha! I hadn’t even noticed that!! And I really should have!
bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"
bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis
bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"
**Psalm 139:16**
With a boy, it's been a little harder. We have several people we'd like to name the baby after and we thought we had come up with the name but wanted to try it out for a little while before announcing it.
When we told my husband's grandmother that we were having a boy, she asked us what his name would be. We told her we were still working on it. Of course, that meant she could give us suggestions. My husband didn't really stop her, explaining we'll take suggestions but we get the ultimate decision. She continued calling us, even after we were in bed last night to talk about this. She's the kind of person that gets easily offended and will hold a grudge to the grave. This morning I've been so stressed out about the situation, I told my husband to tell her that the name is already decided and we're not talking any more suggestions. I completely broke down on the phone this morning when I was talking to my mom about the whole situation and started to cry.
I'm frustrated that this is making me so upset. Usually I can just let what she says roll off my back but I'm having trouble shaking this. Anyways, just needed to vent. I'm sure we'll come up with a name soon and it will be perfect. I'm just feeling like she'll resent it because it won't be what she suggested.
BFP #1: 1/23/2012 DD: Born 9/20/2012
BFP #2: 12/30/2017 DS: Due 9/10/2018
Want your opinion on a name. My husband is no help and thinks my dilemma is no big deal. We like the name Westley, nickname Wes but my mom's name is Leslie and is often called Les. Thoughts? Is it weird/confusing to name our little boy Westley because it rhymes with my Mom's name?
One thought I had is that it may not be that bad because Leslie is a family name (my Mom was named after her Dad), so in a way this is a nod to the name.
I’m jealous of all the people that have names they want to use. We’ve got no ideas.
I also don't think having his nickname rhyme with your mom's is a problem though.
And +1 for I think it's no problem to use Wes and Les (and their connected full names).
MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
DS born 9/13/16
BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
I would only only be concerned with that he similarity to Leslie/Les if your mom basically lives next door and will serve as a full time caregiver. Otherwise I can’t imagine any mixups.
bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"
bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis
bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"
**Psalm 139:16**
I think the one name we both have actually liked is Layla/Leila.
Her middle name for sure is going to be Vae for my grandma.
I really like the name Leila Vae! Really pretty and love the connection to your grandmother.
@ jaylii I really, really like Elliot. I would think about it if I did not have a good friend who used it with her son.
Thoughts on these boy names?:
Nathaniel (nn Nate), Isaac, Bennett
(Middle name will likely be Henry for my grandfather.)
Married Aug. 2013
TTC #1 Sep. 2016
***TW***
BFP Jun. 5, 2017; MMC Aug. 2, 2017 at 11w6d
BFP Nov. 20, 2017; ended in CP
All the tests. Everything normal except treated for ureaplasma and DH potentially has high DNAF.
BFP Dec. 25, 2017; EDD Sep. 5, 2018; DD arrived Aug. 26th
My chart: https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/63f71d