Oh my gosh. I also forgot to add that from the IVF we had 4 that were frozen and biopsied yesterday. There are two more left and they want to give them another day to see if they will make it. I'm keeping those fingers crossed that we get a good phone call today!
Me:38 DW:33 TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
Dx: My wife has no sperm and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look 2016 * April IUI#1 - BFN * June IUI#2 - BFN * July IUI#3 - CP * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP 2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal * April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining) * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal! * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!! 2018 DD born 8/20/18 20195PGS frosties ( 4 remaining) * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
@2MomsHoping what wonderful news!!! 4 already frozen and maybe two more in addition to the little one growing and attaching as we speak! That’s awesome. So glad it went smoothly for you. They had to come back to me too even though I drank a lot of water. I think it happens to a lot of people. Especially if you ate and the water gets absorbed. The two week wait and then obviously anxiety to see if numbers doubled is the part we have the least control over and makes the biggest difference. It’s such an emotional rollercoaster. You sure are at a high point today with all that good news.
@BusinessWife my husband has continuously says he doesn’t want us to get our hopes up. Sorry buddy, my hopes are up. I just spent years of sadness, 25 thousand dollars, dozens (might even be hundreds) of shots, pills, patches and supplements and an egg retrieval with moderate OHSS. It would be a joke to say I don’t have my hopes up. I understand trying to be realistic and also prepare for the bad but really, you can’t prepair for that! I’m so excited for your positive and the beta day for both of us and @funkykey tomorrow!
Me: 36 DH: 33
TTC since June 2016
Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal
FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18
@businesswife- congrats girl!! Love seeing your good news!! I know you amhave been waiting for this moment for a longgg time so you enjoy it! I don’t think not getting your hopes up makes bad news any easier really so you might as well enjoy this time! Good luck tomorrow!
@2momshoping- congrats on the blasts!! That is a great amount! And congrats on being PASP!! I really hope this is your time and that embabie will stick around for 9 months!
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
@2MomsHoping the reasons you described is exactly why I decided this past time to test almost daily. It helped a lot with my anxiety since I had 2 CPs prior to this one. I think it's just best to do whatever helps you keep your stress in check.
Ugh I wrote a long note but the bump seems to have cut off half of it. Basically I was saying I've been really down for the past 2 days...convinced this isn't going to work....fighting with DH....bored and antsy because we didn't make any plans for the weekend and I'm not going back to work until mid December. I haven't tested (am 5dp5dt) and as of now I don't plan to before beta. Don't think I could handle the sadness if it's a BFN.
@irisheyes81. I love that thought of enjoying the 10 days we have with our little one now, regardless of what happens. Will try to think of it like that!
@BusinessWife yay!!!!!!!! Amazing news. Can't wait to hear your beta number tomorrow! @irisheyes81 that is THE seeetest sentiment and I totally agree. Enjoy every moment and hopefully tomorrow brings even better news. @natehk hugs! TWW is awful, especially if your mind isn't occupied with work, or some other non-baby related activity. But don't lose hope, you're embryo is still implanting. My RE you once told me to write down 3 things that worry me every night, then wake up the next morning and write down 3 things I'm grateful for. It sounds super weird, but it helps put your mind in a positive and calm state. @2MomsHoping congrats on that blasts!!
@2MomsHoping Congrats on being PASP! Also 4 blasts and maybe 2 more is awesome!
Best of luck tomorrow @funkykey, @BusinessWife, @Irisheyes81! I have everything crossed for good news from everyone. I’ll be lurking on my lunch break for updates!
@natehk the 2ww sucks. The anxiety mixed with the hormones make for a difficult time. Try to find things to occupy your mind like a good book, movies, go out for a mani/pedi etc. There’s no way to know for sure that it didn’t work at this point so try to stay positive and imagine that little embie sticking and growing!
I used to be able to wait to test until beta. But last night I broke down and bought 9 FRERs. I’m 5dp5dt and “think” I see an invisible line. I think it’s there but definitely not something I can show DH as positive. Then I remember that I did a trigger shot so that’s messing with me to. I wish I had waited. I hate the line tests and trying to figures out if it’s positive or not. Beta is on Thursday at 9dp5dt
Melissa 39 - DH 45 TTC # 1 - 4 years, 7 IUIs, 3 IVF, 1 FET, 2 M/C, DD 2015 TTC # 2 - IVF # 4 March 2017 Long Lupron, 150 Gonal F, 150 Menopur 21R, 12M, 7F, Transferred 2 Froze 1 - BFN FET # 2 May 2017 - BFN IVF # 5 Sep 2017 - Antagonist, no BCP. 200 iu Follistim, 150 iu Menopur, Cetrotide started day 5, Lupron trigger 19R, 13M, 12F, No Transfer - 2 "beautiful" blasts frozen FET # 3 Nov 2017
I'm dreading the beta. My BFN on the 8dpt really took the wind out of my sails. I'm still hopeful, but I'm mentally preparing myself for another childless Christmas.
Like everyone here, I've been through a fair amount to get to this point. No one just does an FET- in order to get to an FET you go through so much. And this was our strongest embryo- my hopes were up so high I'd pinned a whole board of maternity clothes based on the due date. DH and I had started talking about baby names again and parenting, like: "I really want to do this with our kids."
Anyway, I'm terrified for tomorrow. I'm hoping for good news all around, but I'm thinking about buying a bottle of wine and having it ready just in case.
@businesswife Oh gosh that is so wonderful I'm so happy to see this. FX for confirmation very soon.
@funkykey Good luck tomorrow I related so hard to everything you wrote. I had all those same hopes and emotions and sadness. I hope, so strongly, that it was too early, but I completely understand the wine desire.
@artemis618@bababatty I'm so sorry to hear this news, friends. How are you holding up?
@tinjp78 How are you doing? I'm so sad our transfer day was not a lucky one
AFM: I'm pretty depressed. My officemate told me that she is pregnant which sent me into quite the spiral (it was really something textbook -- unplanned, so easy, asked me why we did IVF "so soon," ugh it was awful -- and literally while I was still bleeding, like I needed this so soon after a failure). My RE did an endometrial biopsy/scratch on me yesterday to check for inflammation/infection, and with the hope of an improved implantation rate for our December FET. So, we'll see.
I may not be around a ton as I am going through my grief but I appreciate you ladies and I'm wishing you the very best.
**** TW **** <div class="Spoiler"><p>Unfortunately, I did not turn the digi this morning. Did not let it get me down, bc whatever, still early. But now after dinner, my FRER line is gone and all I have are the same f***ing squinters on the cheapies. So ya. Going to put on a brave face for beta tomorrow. It was bliss while it lasted. :'( </p><p>*typos</p></div>
@adirat - I liked your post because I am glad to see you, not because of your spiral. I hate your officemate! I'm so sorry this has happened to you and is happening to you!! Take all the time you need!! Ugh!
@BusinessWife - I'd be freaking out too. I mean, I am already freaking and I never turned anything positive. Keeping FX for you and hoping for good news tomorrow!! Squinters are good!
@adirat your office mate sucks. I hope the procedure is helpful and informative. I understand you taking a break but I sure love it when you are on here. It was great to hear from you. This is brutal @funkykey. I was so positive and now I’m a ball of stress and anxiety for beta for both of us and @BusinessWife. As awesome as the November group is (over 1k comments!) we have had some good and some terrible luck. @BusinessWife Your tests are playing tricks on you! What a crazy rollercoaster. Fingers crossed for beta. AFM I just got in to a fight with a friend that seems to be around every time I have a really big day and says something mean. It got me all worked up and I’m so worried about beta.
Me: 36 DH: 33
TTC since June 2016
Me: PCOS DH: Morphology 1%
3 TI with Famera and trigger shots-BFN
3 IUI's with Famera and trigger shots- BFN
IVF August 2017 25 eggs retrieved, 19 mature, 13 fertilized (ICSI), 5 frozen, 3 PGS normal
FET November 2017 Transferred one 6 day blast (a little GIRL) BFP EDD 8/4/18
Unfortunately, I did not turn the digi this morning. Did not let it get me down, bc whatever, still early. But now after dinner, my FRER line is gone and all I have are the same f***ing squinters on the cheapies. So ya. Going to put on a brave face for beta tomorrow. It was bliss while it lasted.
*typos
The exact thing happened to me... couldn’t turn a digi till morning of beta! Try again in the AM!
@BusinessWife I’m hoping your urine is just more diluted today.
@adirat I would like to punch that coworker for you. I hope that test gives you some good information to help with your next transfer.
@sunnyrain2 sounds like a good start. FX those lines get darker!
Hoping for good results for all the ladies having betas done tomorrow and strength to deal with all the stress and anxiety that comes with waiting for those results.
@adirat I really hope that you'd be shielded from people like your coworker.
A friend at church who just know that I'm TTC but not IVF, gave me an advice that I should relax more and I'll get pregnant. Before, these things don't get to me, but yesterday, it hit me. It hurts that it isn't that easy. I won't blame her bc she has no clue about what I'm going through now. I'd just have to learn to ignore these destructive emotions.
@BusinessWife I'm really hoping for a positive result for you tomorrow.
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@funkykey Best of luck on your betas, but please don't get too down about the quality. My first two transfers that failed (TW one was a CP) were my higher quality ones. I was completely devastated. I know it's easier said than done, but try and keep an open, optimistic outlook. Praying for good news for you!
@BusinessWife if there was a sudden change in the line darknesd, it could be diluted urine. Fingers crossed for you.
@tinjp78 people say the worst things when it comes to IF and TTC. It's so frustrating.
Blood is drawn. I'm a complete mess. Thinking of you @funkykey and @BusinessWife Thank you all so much for the well wishes. I love having this support system.
@sunnyrain2, @tinjp78 This past week, my mom (who did also struggle with IF but apparently the HSG solved an unseen blockage) told me and DH that we just needed to do the pillow after sex thing because that’s what worked for her, despite knowing all about our treatments. DH and I told her that we were well past a pillow working (believe me, we tried that, too).
Anyone who has followed the ISWTE diet recommendations, how did you track them? I know it’s bascially the Mediterranean diet, but I’m concerned I won’t eat enough veggies if left to my own devices. Since we’re in a bit of a holding pattern, I’m doubling down on my health and fitness in preparation for another ER.
I've asked the nurses to just leave me a voicemail. I don't want to get the call at work. I'll let it go to voicemail and then I'll listen at the end of my day. I'm worried that I won't be able to drive home if it's bad news.
Well our other two blasts didn’t make it. I’m trying to be happy about having 4 but we
have always gotten a low % of PGS normal so I’m just kinda focusing more on
hoping our little embryo is going to be our take home baby. Wishing
luck for all the gals getting betas today.
Thanks @crystal321 it is helpful to know that other people
feel that way about testing too. I’m
still on the fence about it. Since we
have the beta on Sunday I do have the afternoon off to be bummed and I’m a bit
more realistic about what a low beta means at this point so I feel more
prepared.
@natehk I’m sorry you’re having a rough go of it. I have certainly been there. We invest so much time, money, and well I don’t
know what to exactly call it…maybe spirit? Into this process that sometimes it
just becomes a lot. Especially when beta
day is nearing being a bit emotionally unhinged is something I think we all can
relate to. Just remember you will
eventually get through this and its okay to be a mess sometimes. Thinking of you. Hugs.
@sunnyrain2 Okay I
may be admitting to crazy behavior here.
But when I had early positives I would take a picture with my phone and
then adjust the photo settings for shadows to see if it was a real line or my
brain playing tricks on me. It made it
much easier to see. Hopefully tomorrows
test will be more obvious for you J
@funkykey I’m thinking of you. I think we are very similar in how we handle
this whole sh*tshow that is infertility.
We are all here to congratulate you on the good and stand and cry with
you through the disappointment. Good
Luck today my friend.
@adirat people just do not know the power of their words. Or the devastation that happens to couples
suffering with infertility. I’m so sorry
this happened to you and the timing when you are so raw and grieving is
horrible. I wish I had some magic something
to cut people like that off or redirect them but so far my method has been either
been being cold or crying without explaining why…it’s not a good method.
@BuisinessWife I’m still rooting for you. I hope your beta goes well.
Me:38 DW:33 TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
Dx: My wife has no sperm and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look 2016 * April IUI#1 - BFN * June IUI#2 - BFN * July IUI#3 - CP * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP 2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal * April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining) * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal! * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!! 2018 DD born 8/20/18 20195PGS frosties ( 4 remaining) * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
Oh @BusinessWife I'm sorry that the results aren't more conclusive but I'm praying with you that the numbers will look better on Wednesday.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@BusinessWife I will be praying my heart out for your sweet family.
Me: 35 DH: 28 TTC since June 2016 Azoospermia diagnosis (zero count) Dec 2016 AZFc chromosome microdeletion discovery March 2017 Unsuccessful TESE for DH in August 2017 October 2017 IVF with donor sperm
29R, 24M, 16F, 2d5, 4d6 (6 embryos total) Only 3 could have PGS. 2/3 normal. 5 embies frozen 12/15/17 FET #1 (1 embryo)--CP 2/7/17 FET #2 (2 embryos)--BFN Chronic endometritis diagnosis May 2018
ERA Sept 2018--borderline receptive--12 more hours of progesterone Abnormal SIS Oct 2018 Repeat hysteroscopy Nov 1. Treated recurring endometritis. 12/4/18 FET #3 (2 embryos)--BFN Our journey has come to an end.
@BusinessWife I’m so sorry that your results leave you in limbo. It’s a horrible place to be. Lots of hugs. I’m praying for you and your embie. You’re not out yet.
@BusinessWife limbo is such a horrible place to be. Hope you are doing OK and wishing you the best on Wednesday.
Me:38 DW:33 TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
Dx: My wife has no sperm and apparently my embryos aren't as good as they look 2016 * April IUI#1 - BFN * June IUI#2 - BFN * July IUI#3 - CP * Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP * November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP 2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal * April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining) * November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal! * November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!! 2018 DD born 8/20/18 20195PGS frosties ( 4 remaining) * September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
Re: November FET
TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
2016
* April IUI#1 - BFN
* June IUI#2 - BFN
* July IUI#3 - CP
* Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP
* November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP
2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
* April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
* November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
* November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
2018 DD born 8/20/18
2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
* September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
@BusinessWife my husband has continuously says he doesn’t want us to get our hopes up. Sorry buddy, my hopes are up. I just spent years of sadness, 25 thousand dollars, dozens (might even be hundreds) of shots, pills, patches and supplements and an egg retrieval with moderate OHSS. It would be a joke to say I don’t have my hopes up. I understand trying to be realistic and also prepare for the bad but really, you can’t prepair for that! I’m so excited for your positive and the beta day for both of us and @funkykey tomorrow!
@2momshoping- congrats on the blasts!! That is a great amount! And congrats on being PASP!! I really hope this is your time and that embabie will stick around for 9 months!
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
@BusinessWife congrats on the good news so far! We will all be super positive with you
@irisheyes81. I love that thought of enjoying the 10 days we have with our little one now, regardless of what happens. Will try to think of it like that!
@irisheyes81 that is THE seeetest sentiment and I totally agree. Enjoy every moment and hopefully tomorrow brings even better news.
@natehk hugs! TWW is awful, especially if your mind isn't occupied with work, or some other non-baby related activity. But don't lose hope, you're embryo is still implanting. My RE you once told me to write down 3 things that worry me every night, then wake up the next morning and write down 3 things I'm grateful for. It sounds super weird, but it helps put your mind in a positive and calm state.
@2MomsHoping congrats on that blasts!!
Best of luck tomorrow @funkykey, @BusinessWife, @Irisheyes81! I have everything crossed for good news from everyone. I’ll be lurking on my lunch break for updates!
@natehk the 2ww sucks. The anxiety mixed with the hormones make for a difficult time. Try to find things to occupy your mind like a good book, movies, go out for a mani/pedi etc. There’s no way to know for sure that it didn’t work at this point so try to stay positive and imagine that little embie sticking and growing!
TTC # 1 - 4 years, 7 IUIs, 3 IVF, 1 FET, 2 M/C, DD 2015
TTC # 2 - IVF # 4 March 2017 Long Lupron, 150 Gonal F, 150 Menopur
21R, 12M, 7F, Transferred 2 Froze 1 - BFN
FET # 2 May 2017 - BFN
IVF # 5 Sep 2017 - Antagonist, no BCP. 200 iu Follistim, 150 iu Menopur, Cetrotide started day 5, Lupron trigger
19R, 13M, 12F, No Transfer - 2 "beautiful" blasts frozen
FET # 3 Nov 2017
@coco305 thank you!
Sorry all, I've been bumping from my phone these past couple of days, so I'm not as good at it!
@2momshoping - great news!!
@Irisheyes81 - I'm so excited for you.
I'm dreading the beta. My BFN on the 8dpt really took the wind out of my sails. I'm still hopeful, but I'm mentally preparing myself for another childless Christmas.
Like everyone here, I've been through a fair amount to get to this point. No one just does an FET- in order to get to an FET you go through so much. And this was our strongest embryo- my hopes were up so high I'd pinned a whole board of maternity clothes based on the due date. DH and I had started talking about baby names again and parenting, like: "I really want to do this with our kids."
Anyway, I'm terrified for tomorrow. I'm hoping for good news all around, but I'm thinking about buying a bottle of wine and having it ready just in case.
@2MomsHoping congrats on being PASP!
@natehk sending you lots of hugs. I hope that you'll have something to distract you that'll cheer you up during this tww.
@funkykey Good luck tomorrow
@artemis618 @bababatty I'm so sorry to hear this news, friends. How are you holding up?
@tinjp78 How are you doing? I'm so sad our transfer day was not a lucky one
AFM: I'm pretty depressed. My officemate told me that she is pregnant which sent me into quite the spiral (it was really something textbook -- unplanned, so easy, asked me why we did IVF "so soon," ugh it was awful -- and literally while I was still bleeding, like I needed this so soon after a failure). My RE did an endometrial biopsy/scratch on me yesterday to check for inflammation/infection, and with the hope of an improved implantation rate for our December FET. So, we'll see.
I may not be around a ton as I am going through my grief but I appreciate you ladies and I'm wishing you the very best.
**** TW ****
<div class="Spoiler"><p>Unfortunately, I did not turn the digi this morning. Did not let it get me down, bc whatever, still early. But now after dinner, my FRER line is gone and all I have are the same f***ing squinters on the cheapies. So ya. Going to put on a brave face for beta tomorrow. It was bliss while it lasted. :'( </p><p>*typos</p></div>
@adirat - I liked your post because I am glad to see you, not because of your spiral. I hate your officemate! I'm so sorry this has happened to you and is happening to you!! Take all the time you need!! Ugh!
@BusinessWife - I'd be freaking out too. I mean, I am already freaking and I never turned anything positive. Keeping FX for you and hoping for good news tomorrow!! Squinters are good!
This is brutal @funkykey. I was so positive and now I’m a ball of stress and anxiety for beta for both of us and @BusinessWife. As awesome as the November group is (over 1k comments!) we have had some good and some terrible luck.
@BusinessWife Your tests are playing tricks on you! What a crazy rollercoaster. Fingers crossed for beta.
AFM I just got in to a fight with a friend that seems to be around every time I have a really big day and says something mean. It got me all worked up and I’m so worried about beta.
@adirat I would like to punch that coworker for you. I hope that test gives you some good information to help with your next transfer.
@sunnyrain2 sounds like a good start. FX those lines get darker!
Hoping for good results for all the ladies having betas done tomorrow and strength to deal with all the stress and anxiety that comes with waiting for those results.
A friend at church who just know that I'm TTC but not IVF, gave me an advice that I should relax more and I'll get pregnant. Before, these things don't get to me, but yesterday, it hit me. It hurts that it isn't that easy. I won't blame her bc she has no clue about what I'm going through now. I'd just have to learn to ignore these destructive emotions.
@BusinessWife I'm really hoping for a positive result for you tomorrow.
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
@BusinessWife if there was a sudden change in the line darknesd, it could be diluted urine. Fingers crossed for you.
@tinjp78 people say the worst things when it comes to IF and TTC. It's so frustrating.
@Irisheyes81 good luck on your betas
@BusinessWife, @funkykey, @Irisheyes81 Thinking of you all today and praying for some great beta results!
TTC # 1 - 4 years, 7 IUIs, 3 IVF, 1 FET, 2 M/C, DD 2015
TTC # 2 - IVF # 4 March 2017 Long Lupron, 150 Gonal F, 150 Menopur
21R, 12M, 7F, Transferred 2 Froze 1 - BFN
FET # 2 May 2017 - BFN
IVF # 5 Sep 2017 - Antagonist, no BCP. 200 iu Follistim, 150 iu Menopur, Cetrotide started day 5, Lupron trigger
19R, 13M, 12F, No Transfer - 2 "beautiful" blasts frozen
FET # 3 Nov 2017
@sunnyrain2 eye roll is right!!
Anyone who has followed the ISWTE diet recommendations, how did you track them? I know it’s bascially the Mediterranean diet, but I’m concerned I won’t eat enough veggies if left to my own devices. Since we’re in a bit of a holding pattern, I’m doubling down on my health and fitness in preparation for another ER.
I've asked the nurses to just leave me a voicemail. I don't want to get the call at work. I'll let it go to voicemail and then I'll listen at the end of my day. I'm worried that I won't be able to drive home if it's bad news.
Well our other two blasts didn’t make it. I’m trying to be happy about having 4 but we have always gotten a low % of PGS normal so I’m just kinda focusing more on hoping our little embryo is going to be our take home baby. Wishing luck for all the gals getting betas today.
Thanks @crystal321 it is helpful to know that other people feel that way about testing too. I’m still on the fence about it. Since we have the beta on Sunday I do have the afternoon off to be bummed and I’m a bit more realistic about what a low beta means at this point so I feel more prepared.
@natehk I’m sorry you’re having a rough go of it. I have certainly been there. We invest so much time, money, and well I don’t know what to exactly call it…maybe spirit? Into this process that sometimes it just becomes a lot. Especially when beta day is nearing being a bit emotionally unhinged is something I think we all can relate to. Just remember you will eventually get through this and its okay to be a mess sometimes. Thinking of you. Hugs.
@sunnyrain2 Okay I may be admitting to crazy behavior here. But when I had early positives I would take a picture with my phone and then adjust the photo settings for shadows to see if it was a real line or my brain playing tricks on me. It made it much easier to see. Hopefully tomorrows test will be more obvious for you J
@funkykey I’m thinking of you. I think we are very similar in how we handle this whole sh*tshow that is infertility. We are all here to congratulate you on the good and stand and cry with you through the disappointment. Good Luck today my friend.
@adirat people just do not know the power of their words. Or the devastation that happens to couples suffering with infertility. I’m so sorry this happened to you and the timing when you are so raw and grieving is horrible. I wish I had some magic something to cut people like that off or redirect them but so far my method has been either been being cold or crying without explaining why…it’s not a good method.
@BuisinessWife I’m still rooting for you. I hope your beta goes well.
TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
2016
* April IUI#1 - BFN
* June IUI#2 - BFN
* July IUI#3 - CP
* Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP
* November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP
2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
* April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
* November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
* November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
2018 DD born 8/20/18
2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
* September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6
Upadate: ******TW******
Estrogen was 199, Progesterone 19
HCG 12.8
Stay on all meds and repeat Wednesday.
Please please pray for us this baby turns around.
If not, the nurse seems to think we should be able to move onto our next transfer pretty quickly, pending insurance approval.
*typos
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
TTC since June 2016
Azoospermia diagnosis (zero count) Dec 2016
AZFc chromosome microdeletion discovery March 2017
Unsuccessful TESE for DH in August 2017
October 2017 IVF with donor sperm
29R, 24M, 16F, 2d5, 4d6 (6 embryos total)
Only 3 could have PGS. 2/3 normal. 5 embies frozen
12/15/17 FET #1 (1 embryo)--CP
2/7/17 FET #2 (2 embryos)--BFN
Chronic endometritis diagnosis May 2018
ERA Sept 2018--borderline receptive--12 more hours of progesterone
Abnormal SIS Oct 2018
Repeat hysteroscopy Nov 1. Treated recurring endometritis.
12/4/18 FET #3 (2 embryos)--BFN
Our journey has come to an end.
TTC History in Spoiler ***Trigger Warning*** Losses/Child Mentioned
2016
* April IUI#1 - BFN
* June IUI#2 - BFN
* July IUI#3 - CP
* Sept IVF#1 - 4 Retrieved & Mature, 4 Blasts. Fresh Transfer 1 - CP
* November FET #1 - Transferred 1 Blast - CP
2017 Switched REs - Recurrent loss testing for me - all normal, remaining 2 frosties sent for PGS - both abnormal
* April/May IVF#2: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 7 fertilized, 7 blasts! Sent for testing - 2PGS Normals (0 remaining)
* November IVF #3 12R, 8M, 6F, 4 blasts! - All 4 PGS normal!
* November FET# 2 (Transfer a PGS normal from IVF#2) - BFP!!!
2018 DD born 8/20/18
2019 5PGS frosties ( 4 remaining)
* September FET#3 (1PGS normal) - Beta#1: 139.7 Beta#2: 322.6