Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: June/July IVF or FET
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Married in August 2013
IVF w/PGD to rule out a genetic disorder
First IVF cycle: ER 6/20/16 (42 eggs retrieved, 31 mature, 27 fertilized with ICSI, 9 frozen and biopsied)
Results: 3 embies passed both PGD & PGS testing (2 boys and a girl
FET on 8/2/16, transferred our girl embryo.
Beta on 8/11: 124!! Second Beta on 8/15: 1,117. First ultrasound (7 weeks) scheduled for 8/30.
first RE visit 11/15, me - blocked left tube and Low AMH, DH - low count, motility not great
5/16 Lupron, gonal f, menopur, dexamethasone (5/19 suppression check: 13 resting follicles; 5/24: estradiol 457 - decreased menopur;
5/27: estradiol 1417, progesterone 0.18, 5 follicles >15mm, 9 follicles 5-15mm; 5/30: estradiol 2964, progesterone 0.8, 9 follicles
>16mm, 6 follicles 6-11mm; 5/31: estradiol 3149, progesterone 4.1; 6/1 ER)
6/16 egg retrieval 6/1 (15 eggs, 14 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI); 5 day update (5AB (biopsied and frozen), 4AB/C (biopsied and frozen), 2/3, 3 morula, 1 multicellular); 7 day update (4 frozen and sent for CCS: 5AB, 4AB/C, 5AB, 4BB); CCS results (2 normal, 1 abnormal, 1 inconclusive)
7/16 attempt to retest inconclusive - didn't survive thaw
8/16 transfer day 8/1: 2 5AB hatching blasts, beta 8/10 = 250!!, beta #2 8/12 = 572, ultrasound on 8/24...TWINS!
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
first RE visit 11/15, me - blocked left tube and Low AMH, DH - low count, motility not great
5/16 Lupron, gonal f, menopur, dexamethasone (5/19 suppression check: 13 resting follicles; 5/24: estradiol 457 - decreased menopur;
5/27: estradiol 1417, progesterone 0.18, 5 follicles >15mm, 9 follicles 5-15mm; 5/30: estradiol 2964, progesterone 0.8, 9 follicles
>16mm, 6 follicles 6-11mm; 5/31: estradiol 3149, progesterone 4.1; 6/1 ER)
6/16 egg retrieval 6/1 (15 eggs, 14 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI); 5 day update (5AB (biopsied and frozen), 4AB/C (biopsied and frozen), 2/3, 3 morula, 1 multicellular); 7 day update (4 frozen and sent for CCS: 5AB, 4AB/C, 5AB, 4BB); CCS results (2 normal, 1 abnormal, 1 inconclusive)
7/16 attempt to retest inconclusive - didn't survive thaw
8/16 transfer day 8/1: 2 5AB hatching blasts, beta 8/10 = 250!!, beta #2 8/12 = 572, ultrasound on 8/24...TWINS!
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
first RE visit 11/15, me - blocked left tube and Low AMH, DH - low count, motility not great
5/16 Lupron, gonal f, menopur, dexamethasone (5/19 suppression check: 13 resting follicles; 5/24: estradiol 457 - decreased menopur;
5/27: estradiol 1417, progesterone 0.18, 5 follicles >15mm, 9 follicles 5-15mm; 5/30: estradiol 2964, progesterone 0.8, 9 follicles
>16mm, 6 follicles 6-11mm; 5/31: estradiol 3149, progesterone 4.1; 6/1 ER)
6/16 egg retrieval 6/1 (15 eggs, 14 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI); 5 day update (5AB (biopsied and frozen), 4AB/C (biopsied and frozen), 2/3, 3 morula, 1 multicellular); 7 day update (4 frozen and sent for CCS: 5AB, 4AB/C, 5AB, 4BB); CCS results (2 normal, 1 abnormal, 1 inconclusive)
7/16 attempt to retest inconclusive - didn't survive thaw
8/16 transfer day 8/1: 2 5AB hatching blasts, beta 8/10 = 250!!, beta #2 8/12 = 572, ultrasound on 8/24...TWINS!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Here is a wrap up of our results and final screen shot of the tracker.
Total Success: 26/44 (59%) Definitely wish it was higher! Congrats to those with BFPs and H&H 9 months to you!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
**TW**
For those who still follow: I had my first sonogram today and it showed three yolk sacs with three beating hearts.
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Thanks @heidis1!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Hi ladies. I stopped back by to say hello and check in with everyone. I'm sort of crawling out of the sadness caused by losing my tiny one. It really took a lot out of me. I started my period 4 weeks after my d/c. My dr office was completely booked for appointments so I'll be on bc for 3 weeks while waiting for my appt to have another saline infused ultrasound. Hopefully I'll be able to do another FET very soon; we are so ready to try again. I'll come back then. Hugs to everybody
@emgem819 I'm so sad to hear your news. I just went through the same awfulness. I am so sorry.
@babylonghorn16 I have been thinking about you and I'm very happy to see your good news! I hope you have a calm and healthy pregnancy.
@wifeinraleigh28 I've been thinking about you too! Your FET will be here before you know it. FX for you.
Me: 26 DH: 29
Married Dec 2012
TTC since Jan 2013, interruptions by DH deployments
April 2015, Clomid + gonal f, natural, BFN
Oct 8 2015, Clomid + brevelle, too many follis (10!)- cancelled
Nov 18 2015, Follistem + Ovidrel + Progesterone, 1 folli, IUI #1 on 12/11, BFN
Dec 24 2015, Follistem + Ovidrel + Progesterone, 1 folli, IUI #2 on 1/15, BFN
Jan 29 2016, Follistem + Ovidrel + Progesterone, 2 follis, IUI #3 on 2/11, BFN
March 2016, Follistem + Ovidrel + Progesterone, 2 follis, BD at home this time,BFN
IVF: Stim's start 4/23, ER May 4th, 8 embabies frozen
FET #1 5/31/16, transferred 1 embryo- BFP: Beta 6/8/16 111, Beta 6/14/16 1800....m/c, d&c 7/15/16
FET #2 9/21/16, transferred 1 embryo......BFP!!: Beta 10/1/16 493, Beta 10/3/16 1155
SINGLETON- EDD June 9th, 2016
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
Just had my first u/s!! Baby looked GREAT! At 6wks 2days we heard heartbeat... AMAZING! I was shocked! DH got teary and I cried. It's been a good morning! Hope everyone is doing well!
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
Me: 28 DH: 33, Married May 2014
3 failed IUIs Dec '15 - Feb '16
IVF April/May 2016 - 1 failed fresh transfer. 11 snow angels.
Lawson arrived on 4/24/2017 at 7lbs 15oz, 21 1/2 inches long!
Surprise pregnancy!! Baby #2 due 10/11/18
@babylonghorn16 Your update made me soooooooooo happy!!! How exciting for you and DH! I can't wait to hear how your next u/s goes!!
Me: 34, DH: 38 ~ TTC since 2014
IUI #1-3 (Nov 2015, Feb 2016, May 2016) = BFNs
IVF ER (July 2016) = 7 PGS normal embryos
FET #1 (Sept 2016) = BFP! DD born 5/30/17
FET #2 (April 2019) = BFN
FET #3 (July 2019) = BFP! DS born 3/27/20