OMG! I finally had a rude comment from a stranger.. well a patient of mine... who is kind of weird to begin with. So he starts off by telling my I should be taking care of myself and why was I walking around, blah blah blah. THEN he mumbled something and I said, "excuse me?" and he said "answer me quietly, watch my eyes" as I'm getting weirded out he looks at my left hand and says "Is that because you just didn't feel like wearing it?" meaning my empty left hand/ring finger...... First of all ASSHOLE. It's none of your business. Maybe I'm a single mom doing this on my own and don't need a ring on my finger!! Second, did you ever stop to realize pregnant women swell and can't fit into ANYTHING they did pre-pregnancy... including rings. Ahhhh... has me so angry. Some people need a damn filter.... or muzzle.
Yeah, I don't get out much, but I've got one for this thread today!
Setting: me in line at Target with 2 yr old twins in stroller, behaving well at 5:30pm (kind of a miracle) Cashier: "Are you crazy?" Me: "What do you think?"
I don't think I deserved that comment...well not today anyway! I had a bra on, the twins were happy, I spent $40 on toddler shoes, shampoo, and Easter candy (all for me btw). not bad, right?!
Mama to Three Girls: Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!
I haven't had any really uncomfortable comments, fortunately, just things that make me scratch my head.
1. Lady in my office is very concerned about where we are going to send our child to school in 5 years. 2. Multiple people at work do not believe me that i'm returning after my maternity leave. I do understand that women say they're coming back and then decide they aren't going to but it's really annoying to hear it every day. It's like it's unacceptable for a women to want to return to work and help provide financially for their family.
These obviously pale in comparison to some of yalls' stories...but the more I read through, the more validated I feel in being a homebody.
I haven't had any really uncomfortable comments, fortunately, just things that make me scratch my head.
1. Lady in my office is very concerned about where we are going to send our child to school in 5 years. 2. Multiple people at work do not believe me that i'm returning after my maternity leave. I do understand that women say they're coming back and then decide they aren't going to but it's really annoying to hear it every day. It's like it's unacceptable for a women to want to return to work and help provide financially for their family.
These obviously pale in comparison to some of yalls' stories...but the more I read through, the more validated I feel in being a homebody.
I just started getting the "are you SURE you're coming back to work?". i just say "well, the kids probably gunna want shoes and music lessons and toys at Christmas so, yeah. I'm gunna work"
I another person tells me that I "don't look pregnant from the back" I might freak out. I know it is meant as a compliment but it just skeeves me out. And does anyone look pregnant from the back?
Yes! So much this! WTH do people think pregnant women look like from behind? Last time I checked the baby grows in the front of my body.
My MIL keeps asking if I am sure I am having a girl because I am carrying in the front rather than all over. My FIL says I shouldn't buy too many girl clothes in case the doctors are all wrong. They have each told me multiple times about their friend who was told by the doctor that she was having a girl and her son is now turning 21. Pretty sure technology has advanced a bit in the last 20 years!
So many people have asked "were you trying?" At first I was floored and embarrassed to answer, it is a pretty personal question about my sex life. Now I answer, "well, that particular night we weren't trying as hard not to as we normally do."
I'm sure somewhere in this thread is a post from me about an older, single without children by choice coworker who has said weird things to me throughout two pregnancies now. I haven't gotten the guts to say something to really express that I'd like her to stop....but the other day when she commented about baby "really making herself known" for the millionth time I said, "yeah, well, that's what happens when you grow a human." She means no harm but honestly it bugs me that she feels so justified in commenting on my body and it's annoying!
I've had a lot of insensitive things said to me over this pregnancy, all by men in the guise of jokes. The most recent one was from a friend's dad saying, well you've gotten fatter... My response was, well that's what happens when your pregnant. People just don't have survival instincts.
I tutor part time and was walking into the office with my boss today. He looked at me and asked, "so you really sure you want to do this whole kid thing, and take off of work? I mean, I wasn't sure when you told me and it's getting to be down to the wire." I didn't even know where to go with that one.
I just got one while we were doing prego pics. Someone passing by in the park asked when I was due. I said "May" to be deliberately vague because twin delivery dates are unpredictable. She asked if we knew what we were having and I said "twin girls". She then says "Oh, wow! I thought you looked pretty huge for a May due date but now it makes sense."
Thanks.
Everyone seems to either comment on me being huge for having two more months to go or that I am tiny for having twins.
Today this guy said to me, "life's a lot easier on the inside!" while nodding to my belly. Innocent enough comment, except that it was at the gym pool and I was by myself (waiting for my friend to come out of the dressing room), in a bikini.
Made me realize that these comments totally depend on context and who's saying them. Last night my mom's friend told me I looked huge, but in such a nice and loving way, I thought it was nice. When I'm by myself, in a bikini at the pool and you're an older man in a wet swimsuit? Don't even look in my general direction.
I am 31 weeks and the world has decided that I look super pregnant... At least once a day someone comments that I look like I'm "ready to go" or "about to pop" and people are shocked when I tell them I have two months left! So far I've never been offended by anyone... I haven't had anyone comment who wasn't trying to be nice or pleasant, so I just roll with it! Even though I'm completely miserable physically and emotionally, I've decided that it's otherwise fun to have people ask about or comment on the pregnancy - I enjoy that much more than trying to keep the whole thing a secret while throwing up in secret all day everyday!!! LOL
I will tell you the most recent one that did surprise me a little ...
I was walking in a parking lot to my car (carrying some ColdStone Creamery of course) and an elderly woman driving by stopped her car, rolled down her window and said "ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE THAT BABY BEFORE YOU GET HOME!??!?!?" lol !!!! Oh jeeze.
At work on Friday. Male co-worker: A girl? No, it's a boy. Girls suck all the pretty out and you look good, considering. Me: Well, I guess she'll be ugly. Unless the the two blood tests and anatomy scans were wrong. Him: I'd buy yellow and green if I were you.
So glad my construction company hires psychic obstetricians to run our jobs!
At work on Friday. Male co-worker: A girl? No, it's a boy. Girls suck all the pretty out and you look good, considering. Me: Well, I guess she'll be ugly. Unless the the two blood tests and anatomy scans were wrong. Him: I'd buy yellow and green if I were you.
So glad my construction company hires psychic obstetricians to run our jobs!
This is hilarious!! The crap that comes out of some people's mouths. I look like I'm having a boy gojng by the old wives tale of how high I'm carrying...definitely having a girl though!
At work on Friday. Male co-worker: A girl? No, it's a boy. Girls suck all the pretty out and you look good, considering. Me: Well, I guess she'll be ugly. Unless the the two blood tests and anatomy scans were wrong. Him: I'd buy yellow and green if I were you.
So glad my construction company hires psychic obstetricians to run our jobs!
LOL. I got something similar the other day... I was like "Nope, definitely a girl."
I guess maybe I can take it as a compliment though?
UPS guy dropped off a package and our admin was on vacation. He eyed me up and down, then said "Soon?" ... Actually I still have 10 weeks to go, douche.
Then he asks if we have a name picked out to which I said no (we don't, but we're close). He proceeded to grill me "Any thoughts?" "You have to have a few in mind that you like!" etc. Um, my own family isn't that invasive about the name stuff! I literally don't even know your name. Go away!
Not a stranger, but this weekend was my baby shower and I got a lot of comments like "are you sure there aren't two in there!?" and "wow, you really popped!" I know it was only good intentions behind these comments, so I didn't take it too personally, even though several of these people see me EVERY DAY AT WORK.
The worst was my aunt, though. On her way out, she goes "Well, enjoy these last weeks, because it all goes downhill from here..." She seemed to have realized what she said and quickly added in "...uh, and uphill too!" but the damage was done! The part that bothers me is that I'm in pain everyday, I can't bend over, I think I have a UTI, I sweat just trying to sit up straight, and I honestly am trying to enjoy these last few weeks before my life changes forever. But its hard and my body hates me right now! And I don't need somebody telling me that my life is going to go downhill soon! At my baby shower! I mean, I chose to get pregnant, and even if I didn't, why ya trying to bring me down!?
@Jparke2 my coworker had twins and whenever anyone would say anything like "you think you're uncomfortable now!" She's just respond with "no, I KNOW I'll be more comfortable once these two are on the outside". That's exactly how I feel with one baby in me- sure I'll be tired and hormones will continue to go nuts, but my body can start to get better!
@Jparke2 my coworker had twins and whenever anyone would say anything like "you think you're uncomfortable now!" She's just respond with "no, I KNOW I'll be more comfortable once these two are on the outside". That's exactly how I feel with one baby in me- sure I'll be tired and hormones will continue to go nuts, but my body can start to get better!
Exactly! My body will hurt for a while after birth and there will be all kinds of physical things going on, of course. But I will start to heal and eventually I WILL adjust to parenthood. You know, like everybody else! And I'm HAPPY to take on the stress of parenthood, I feel so lucky!
It doesn't help that one of my serious pet peeves is when people try to tell me things or give me advice but I can really tell they are just doing it so they feel smarter than me. I've never had a baby, so I'm glad to take advice/tips/etc. from people, but some people just have that tone, ya know? Like they are reveling in the fact that they get to bestow their grand knowledge on me and scare me at the same time! I don't know, maybe I'm just sensitive right now!
@Jparke2 my coworker had twins and whenever anyone would say anything like "you think you're uncomfortable now!" She's just respond with "no, I KNOW I'll be more comfortable once these two are on the outside". That's exactly how I feel with one baby in me- sure I'll be tired and hormones will continue to go nuts, but my body can start to get better!
Exactly! My body will hurt for a while after birth and there will be all kinds of physical things going on, of course. But I will start to heal and eventually I WILL adjust to parenthood. You know, like everybody else! And I'm HAPPY to take on the stress of parenthood, I feel so lucky!
It doesn't help that one of my serious pet peeves is when people try to tell me things or give me advice but I can really tell they are just doing it so they feel smarter than me. I've never had a baby, so I'm glad to take advice/tips/etc. from people, but some people just have that tone, ya know? Like they are reveling in the fact that they get to bestow their grand knowledge on me and scare me at the same time! I don't know, maybe I'm just sensitive right now!
I'm the same! We want a big family so my DH has been telling people that we plan on being pregnant next year as well (who knows if that will happen) and people act like we're so dumb. My IL's constantly say "well have one and then see how you feel". I WANT to be a mom and I want to be a mom to a few kids. It's like you get pregnant and suddenly people think you can no longer make your own choices.
I got stopped in the elevator last week (33 weeks) and a stranger told me "You're having a boy." It wasn't a question. She was telling me lol..thing is, I'm having a girl. I told her "Nope, it's a girl." She follows with, "No, it's a boy. You will see." SO weird.
I got stopped in the elevator last week (33 weeks) and a stranger told me "You're having a boy." It wasn't a question. She was telling me lol..thing is, I'm having a girl. I told her "Nope, it's a girl." She follows with, "No, it's a boy. You will see." SO weird.
I had an airline worker tell me this back in January. She said "it's a girl!" when she scanned my ticket and I said nope, it's a boy. Then she said "nope, it's a girl!" I just turned around and boarded the plane because what?
I got stopped in the elevator last week (33 weeks) and a stranger told me "You're having a boy." It wasn't a question. She was telling me lol..thing is, I'm having a girl. I told her "Nope, it's a girl." She follows with, "No, it's a boy. You will see." SO weird.
I had an airline worker tell me this back in January. She said "it's a girl!" when she scanned my ticket and I said nope, it's a boy. Then she said "nope, it's a girl!" I just turned around and boarded the plane because what?
Why do people insist they know the sex without any scientific basis whatsoever - especially when you have a basis for telling them they're wrong!? I had a lady in line at the post office a few weeks ago insist that I was having a girl - even after I told her it was a boy - based on the way I was carrying. So I proceeded to inform her that we had genetic testing done and that it came back with XY chromosomes, so she was clearly wrong this time. She was like, "Well, you never know." Really - WTF, lady!? I just rolled my eyes, said, "Actually, yes I do," and turned around. You can't argue with stupid!
For about a month now, I'm met with shocked expressions when people ask how far along I am. I guess I look a lot bigger than I should or something, and I know people don't mean to be rude, but seriously, I feel fat enough without people being like "what?! May is far off!" No, its really not, especially considering its highly possible I'll deliver end of April.
Also, I went to a baby shower for a friend this past weekend and a woman next to me kept commenting about my friend who was opening presents and to me about how life was about to get really hard for us/we'd never sleep again/we'd never have a second to ourselves again/etc. OK THANKS, lady! This is a happy event, don't need you spreading negativity! At one point my friend opened a cute pack of the bibs that look like bandanas, and the lady goes "...why not just use a bib? I don't get it." Seriously? I couldn't believe how rude she was being. It's awful to bash someone at their own baby shower, but its a whole other problem to be bashing to another pregnant person. And she was basically bashing the person who gave the gift, too. UGH.
This is only kind of a similar rant, but I am personally sick of everyone's negativity in general, especially the ones that love to say "oh you think you're tired now, just wait" I get that babies interrupt sleep but it's like YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW UNSYMPATHETIC YOU SOUND RIGHT NOW. it's rude to ask how I'm doing then follow up with, oh it'll get worse. Jackasses
I got stopped in the elevator last week (33 weeks) and a stranger told me "You're having a boy." It wasn't a question. She was telling me lol..thing is, I'm having a girl. I told her "Nope, it's a girl." She follows with, "No, it's a boy. You will see." SO weird.
I had an airline worker tell me this back in January. She said "it's a girl!" when she scanned my ticket and I said nope, it's a boy. Then she said "nope, it's a girl!" I just turned around and boarded the plane because what?
I got stopped in the elevator last week (33 weeks) and a stranger told me "You're having a boy." It wasn't a question. She was telling me lol..thing is, I'm having a girl. I told her "Nope, it's a girl." She follows with, "No, it's a boy. You will see." SO weird.
I had an airline worker tell me this back in January. She said "it's a girl!" when she scanned my ticket and I said nope, it's a boy. Then she said "nope, it's a girl!" I just turned around and boarded the plane because what?
The lady at the counter of my obgyn just told me that I was breathing like I ran a marathon.
Thanks... Nearly 8 months pregnant, and you work in a place that sees pregnant all day, I appreciate you pointing out something I was just telling my husband I was insecure about not thirty seconds prior.
Not a comment per se, but this morning I was in 7-11 and a guy looked me up and down while making creepy "mmm mmm mmm!" sounds. Wtf.
Also at 7-11, while pumping gas the other day, this guy just loitering outside is all "Yeah, get it girl!"
I have noticed a marked increase in the number of catcalls I get, which I find both baffling and disconcerting. Like, I am decidedly NOT sexy right now. Anyone else notice this?
OK, so speaking of creepers who like preggo's....some dude at my old job was fired for watching porn at work. not just as porn, he had a fetish of pregnant women porn. WTF.
@AliciaD39 my husband says this to me everyday and it drives me nuts!!! We will be at home, in the car, where ever and he'll say "You're breathing really loudly"... UHM Let's shove a baby up against your lungs and see how you do!! He is so not good at catching on to what he shouldn't say!
I know I'm being just totally insane... but I've decided I HATE IT when people tell me I am glowing, or look beautiful, or am "all belly". I feel like a giant whale of a person - my feet and calves and arms and fingers and face are all fat and I feel disgusting! And I know people are trying to be so nice, but I'm so sure they're just saying what you're supposed to say to a pregnant lady and they're not actually saying it because I look nice. I look gross!!!!!! Some mornings I have to seriously give myself a pep talk to convince myself to go to work because I just don't want to be looked at all day Everyone looks at me everywhere I go and I'm so over it!!
I finally had somebody try to touch the baby bump!
....aaand it was an obviously mentally ill, yellow-toothed, muttering homeless dude who creeped up (and I do mean "creeped up," not "crept up") on me while I was waiting for the light to change so I could cross at an intersection.
I was trying to ignore him, thinking/hoping that maybe he just wanted to cross along with the rest of the crowd, but then he reached over and tried to pat my belly. I smacked his arm away and yelled "GET AWAY FROM ME" and crossed as soon as the light changed, and he wandered off while still muttering to himself.
It was total reflex, I wasn't thinking through any of that, but I'm honestly kind of pleased to know that apparently my reflex reaction is to hit the guy and yell. Obviously it would have been better to not even let him get that close, but I just wasn't paying attention.
groooosss
Well anyway, now I have gotten confirmation from the cosmos that yes, somebody literally does have to be crazy to try and go for the bump. And yet, unfortunately, such people exist and will try it.
Honestly I don't feel scared but that's probably just because it happened during full daylight on a very busy street corner and I never felt like I was in actual danger. (There's no rational reason I should feel that way -- you can obviously get attacked during any time of day and no matter who's around, especially when the attacker is completely insane -- but in this instance I think I'm just gonna let my brain fool itself and not push too hard against that.)
So this didn't come from a stranger but a friend of mine said today, I could just about be having triplets with the size of my boobs. Yes they're bloody enormous but come on seriously...give me a break. I'm self conscious enough as it is.
Totally not a stranger, it's my MIL.... always walks through the door with some type of "oh you've gotten huge" "what's up chubby?" She topped it off the other night when she greeted me with "Hey fatso!"
like foreal? At least I'm growing a human right now, what's your excuse? Does she think it's cute, or does her mind just literally not work at all....?
& let me make note, that this is my second pregnancy, and she knows I had a lot of issues after my first about gaining weight and it made me self conscious, so is this just her using something I told her against me to feel better about herself??? & I've gained less this go around than with my first! Psycho....
Re: Comments from Strangers Thread
Setting: me in line at Target with 2 yr old twins in stroller, behaving well at 5:30pm (kind of a miracle)
Cashier: "Are you crazy?"
Me: "What do you think?"
I don't think I deserved that comment...well not today anyway! I had a bra on, the twins were happy, I spent $40 on toddler shoes, shampoo, and Easter candy (all for me btw). not bad, right?!
Mama to Three Girls:
Twins born March 2014 at 26 weeks due to preterm labor
and our 37weeker born May 9th, 2016!
1. Lady in my office is very concerned about where we are going to send our child to school in 5 years.
2. Multiple people at work do not believe me that i'm returning after my maternity leave. I do understand that women say they're coming back and then decide they aren't going to but it's really annoying to hear it every day. It's like it's unacceptable for a women to want to return to work and help provide financially for their family.
These obviously pale in comparison to some of yalls' stories...but the more I read through, the more validated I feel in being a homebody.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
i just say "well, the kids probably gunna want shoes and music lessons and toys at Christmas so, yeah. I'm gunna work"
Thanks.
Everyone seems to either comment on me being huge for having two more months to go or that I am tiny for having twins.
Made me realize that these comments totally depend on context and who's saying them. Last night my mom's friend told me I looked huge, but in such a nice and loving way, I thought it was nice. When I'm by myself, in a bikini at the pool and you're an older man in a wet swimsuit? Don't even look in my general direction.
I will tell you the most recent one that did surprise me a little ...
I was walking in a parking lot to my car (carrying some ColdStone Creamery of course) and an elderly woman driving by stopped her car, rolled down her window and said "ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE THAT BABY BEFORE YOU GET HOME!??!?!?" lol !!!! Oh jeeze.
Me: Well, I guess she'll be ugly. Unless the the two blood tests and anatomy scans were wrong.
Him: I'd buy yellow and green if I were you.
So glad my construction company hires psychic obstetricians to run our jobs!
I guess maybe I can take it as a compliment though?
Then he asks if we have a name picked out to which I said no (we don't, but we're close). He proceeded to grill me "Any thoughts?" "You have to have a few in mind that you like!" etc. Um, my own family isn't that invasive about the name stuff! I literally don't even know your name. Go away!
BFP 1: 9/15/2013 | DD 5/23/2014
BFP 2: 9/15/2015 | EDD 5/26/2016
The worst was my aunt, though. On her way out, she goes "Well, enjoy these last weeks, because it all goes downhill from here..." She seemed to have realized what she said and quickly added in "...uh, and uphill too!" but the damage was done! The part that bothers me is that I'm in pain everyday, I can't bend over, I think I have a UTI, I sweat just trying to sit up straight, and I honestly am trying to enjoy these last few weeks before my life changes forever. But its hard and my body hates me right now! And I don't need somebody telling me that my life is going to go downhill soon! At my baby shower! I mean, I chose to get pregnant, and even if I didn't, why ya trying to bring me down!?
It doesn't help that one of my serious pet peeves is when people try to tell me things or give me advice but I can really tell they are just doing it so they feel smarter than me. I've never had a baby, so I'm glad to take advice/tips/etc. from people, but some people just have that tone, ya know? Like they are reveling in the fact that they get to bestow their grand knowledge on me and scare me at the same time! I don't know, maybe I'm just sensitive right now!
Thanks... Nearly 8 months pregnant, and you work in a place that sees pregnant all day, I appreciate you pointing out something I was just telling my husband I was insecure about not thirty seconds prior.
I have noticed a marked increase in the number of catcalls I get, which I find both baffling and disconcerting. Like, I am decidedly NOT sexy right now. Anyone else notice this?
....aaand it was an obviously mentally ill, yellow-toothed, muttering homeless dude who creeped up (and I do mean "creeped up," not "crept up") on me while I was waiting for the light to change so I could cross at an intersection.
I was trying to ignore him, thinking/hoping that maybe he just wanted to cross along with the rest of the crowd, but then he reached over and tried to pat my belly. I smacked his arm away and yelled "GET AWAY FROM ME" and crossed as soon as the light changed, and he wandered off while still muttering to himself.
It was total reflex, I wasn't thinking through any of that, but I'm honestly kind of pleased to know that apparently my reflex reaction is to hit the guy and yell. Obviously it would have been better to not even let him get that close, but I just wasn't paying attention.
groooosss
Well anyway, now I have gotten confirmation from the cosmos that yes, somebody literally does have to be crazy to try and go for the bump. And yet, unfortunately, such people exist and will try it.
Honestly I don't feel scared but that's probably just because it happened during full daylight on a very busy street corner and I never felt like I was in actual danger. (There's no rational reason I should feel that way -- you can obviously get attacked during any time of day and no matter who's around, especially when the attacker is completely insane -- but in this instance I think I'm just gonna let my brain fool itself and not push too hard against that.)
But it sure was a wtf.
like foreal? At least I'm growing a human right now, what's your excuse? Does she think it's cute, or does her mind just literally not work at all....?
& let me make note, that this is my second pregnancy, and she knows I had a lot of issues after my first about gaining weight and it made me self conscious, so is this just her using something I told her against me to feel better about herself??? & I've gained less this go around than with my first! Psycho....