May 2022 Moms

The Great Big Question Thread

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Re: The Great Big Question Thread

  • @skc040512 motherhood was my go to, because you could filter to "nursing only". I didn't want to keep wearing baggy maternity clothes because they wouldn't have fit me. Also, I had some maternity/nursing clothes from pink blush that worked and weren't super baggy. 
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  • I wouldn’t stress it. I’ve gained 21 lbs so far and my OB isn’t concerned. I’m also tall and active. As long as stats are good and baby is healthy…you are good as gold! 
  • At 26 weeks I had gained about 18-20 lbs. it’s within range and I feel good, but I’m hoping it slows down. By “hoping” I mean I’m not really actively trying to slow it down.. just putting out some good vibes for myself. 😂 (as I eat my salad AND my knockoff Girl Scout cookies)

    But I have actually been working out since Dec (which I haven’t done consistently in 2+ years) and I always gain weight when I workout. So I’m hoping some of this is muscle gain! Maybe PP I will have ever so slightly toned arms/legs to go with my pooch? A girl can dream. 
  • sph97sph97 member
    @brookejayo6 it's called balance, lol! I eat my share of fruit and veggies + ice cream and donuts (we got a new donut shop in town and now even my husband is hooked lol!) 
  • I had lost a ton of weight for my wedding right before we got pregnant so I'm not shocked that I've gained 25 lbs already. I was really limiting my diet for a year and running 5 miles almost every day.

    Now I'm eating pretty healthy with added sweet treats and working out about 3 times a week. I had a big weight gain Jan - Feb, but was also eating nightly ice cream sundaes 😬 I'm back on track for 1lb a week and I'm hoping it stays that way until May lol
  • @karisahamdi i love the nightly ice cream sundae ritual! Don’t stop! 
  • @karisahamdi it's very similar to my nightly half pint of ice cream ritual  :D
  • @pajamstagrams I’m on my second carton of ice cream for the last rolling 6 days 🥴
  • Y’all and the ice cream is like me and the nightly peanut butter 😂😂😂
                                                                                      
  • @and846 @pajamstagrams I switched to fruit bars for now, but I 100% still indulge in milkshakes on a frequent basis 🤣
  • Kick counts - are any of y’all doing them now and actually tracking? 
                                                                                      
  • @MrsLaLaBug I’m 30w+a few days now so I’m “doing” them, but in reality, that just means I make sure to sit down during the day when I know she’s typically active (usually a little after lunch) and make sure her movements feel normal. Idk if I’ve actually sat and tracked the kicks for the last 2 pregnancies, but I just more try to make sure the overall active patterns stay the same, if that makes sense. (Which is actually how we figured out DS was transverse - I stopped feeling a lot of his smaller movements so I had a NST and ultrasound and they were like “yup, he’s just in there sideways so you won’t feel his kicks the same”)
  • I am so here for the nightly ice cream - it's been a staple lately in our house. My midwives don't weigh me, but I've gained around 20 pounds or so. I think that's a little less than last time.
    @MrsLaLaBug I have not started officially doing it, but mostly because I get kicked a whole bunch at least twice a day.
  • @MrsLaLaBug my OB didn't specifically mention it, but I'll do them if I feel it's been a less active day. Most days I'm a pathetic couch potato so I feel movement constantly and don't bother. 

    Side note, definitely don't remember kicks hurting this much. 😂 I've got one spot that's sore to the touch because it's right where his feet have been. 
  • @MrsLaLaBug same as the others. Don’t actually count, but take notice that things are relatively the same day to day.
  • @MrsLaLaBug I was talking about this with my midwife and they said they recommended fetal movement awareness, so paying attention to when baby is normally moves and how much and seeing if you notice a decrease. 

    They shared a bunch of information and actually recommended I look into more research from Australia because they've made a huge push to focus on this.

    It was super interesting since everything I've read in the US really focuses on kick counts. Either way I'm sure they don't hurt to do! 
  • TTM+ what was your third delivery like? Timing in comparison to your others as well as duration in comparison to your others. Trying to figure out if I should be super panicked we don't have a solid plan for our older kids when labour starts, or just moderately panicked. I have this sneaky feeling that if I don't have a homebirth while waiting for hubby to figure things out last minute, I'll end up doing it on my own in a taxi on the way to the hospital...
  • @annashaf I’m scared of this too - even though I’m a RCS this time 😂
                                                                                      
  • @pajamstagrams Same!!!! His Movements are painful. My midwife thinks I have some internal bruising 😩
  • @annashaf My first was overdue by a week and a ridiculously long labor that ended with a c-section and my second was induced 12 hr delivery.  Im hoping I'll be induced so we can plan for my MIL to be here, but if she isn't here already it could take a long while for her to get here.  She is a slow mover and lives 30 minutes away.  Can take her 2/3 hrs to get ready and out the door and we have a 30 min drive to the hospital.  I think its definitely time to have a plan in place for who your husband can call to come watch the kids but if you have fast labors then who knows what will happen.
  • My first was very long. Labour started on my due date with DD1 born 40+1. My second was extremely short (less than an hour...). They did break my water though. DD2 was 5 days early. I think that IF my waters break on their own, baby is just gonna slide right on out. Good news is that my waters have never broken on their own so...fingers crossed!
  • b_1029b_1029 member
    edited March 2022
    @annashaf uhhh less than an hour?! Holy moly. I’m hoping my 2nd is faster than my first (early labor 1 day, the next morning my water started leaking and contractions started immediately at 5:30 am, DD wasn’t born till 24 hours later) but not that fast 😅

    ETA labor started for on 38+3 I think? 
  • I think I have done kick counts "officially" once and used that recording section in TB app. However, this kid moves so much between the little rolls and full internal assault kicks that I feel comfortable not doing kick counts. I do, however, notice if he is a little quite and make sure to stop moving, give him a good poke and drink cold water to get him moving again. That usually happens when I'm at work and log 10k plus steps. I've been a potato this week on the couch and around the house so he has been way active.
  • @annashaf this is my second pregnancy. I’ve heard of baby coming earlier with second pregnancy. I’m hoping he comes right on time. I was only two days overdue with my first. We’re a military family and have no relatives where we are. My mom and sister are flying in for a little over a week around my due date PRAYING baby comes during that time so we don’t have to scramble to find someone to watch my daughter. We have lots of friends here but I would prefer not to leave my daughter with anyone other than family. I think it would cause me more stress for her to be with some of our friends than for me to give birth alone and have my husband stay with her 😂  I’m just sitting here trying to predict when baby will come knowing full well you can’t do that. Maybe we’ll get lucky and I’ll have him while my daughter is in daycare 😂 
  • @annashaf So my first two were inductions and my third was spontaneous labor. They were all comparable in length of time I was in labor (around 12-15 hours, I count from the time I recognize painful contractions to baby born) but the pushing portion got quicker each time. The way my body births - as soon as the bag of waters is broken (whether manually or spontaneously), I have a baby out in less than 15 mins. So I don't have a concern about not getting to the hospital in time - unless my water breaks which then means I'm having a baby wherever I am at that moment lol 
    Married 11.12.11
    JB 08.02.13 
    EC 12.11.15
    GE 04.04.19
    #4 & #5 due 05.05.22
  • @annashaf with DD1, my water broke without me going into labor, so I was induced at 39+3. I delivered within 22 hours of it breaking, but about 11 hours after the induction started and a little less than 20 minutes of pushing. With DD2 I was induced at 41+some days - labored for about 8 hours with her and pushed for just over 10 minutes. DS had a failed induction at 39 weeks (he was transverse and finally flipped head down so we induced to try to avoid an emergency c section), followed by a successful induction the next morning. I only labored around 4 hours with him and pushed him out in 1.5 contractions. I would definitely make sure you have a plan in place (usually that means you won’t need it after all, right? Lol) - I have noticed my body goes into labor prep mode much easier with each baby, but everyone is different so who knows
  • Does anyone know if you need like documentation from your doctor to be able to fly while pregnant? My OB okayed me flying until 34 weeks, just wondering if the airlines are going to ask for documentation or anything. I’ve never had to fly while pregnant before so I have no idea!
  • sph97sph97 member
    @jc0820 I don't think you do, you can always call/look up the airline and double check though!
  • @jc0820 I think technically they aren't supposed to require it until like 36+ wks (depends on the airline) but you never know when a flight or gate attendant is going to make a judgement call and ask you to prove you can fly, etc. 

    FWIW I flew at 14 and 25 wks with DD and nobody questioned it. I think it's just if you plan on flying mid/late 3rd trimester or happen to look super pregnant to someone where you'd get flagged. 
  • @MrsLaLaBug I started kick counts but it literally takes like five minutes to get to ten with this kid so I really haven’t done it often. 

    @jc0820 I flew with Southwest at 20ish weeks and didn’t need anything. And you and one “helper” get to pre-board! Should be that way for all airlines. Just got to the helper people at the terminal and they’ll get you set up. It really helps to get a seat near the front or back near the head. 
  • @taylorharris0522 those cards are perfect! And I think the brunch is the perfect time to bring it up, doesn’t need to be a formal convo at all IMHO!! The way you bring it about will probably set the tone for the involvement you’re looking for, so an easy peasy casual convo with a sweet card is a great way I think! 
    When we asked DH best friend and his wife to be godparents for our kids, we were at a crawfish boil at their house which is about as informal as it gets! 🤣❤️🦞 
                                                                                      
  • annashafannashaf member
    edited March 2022
    We don’t do god parents, but I think, from what I’ve heard that the card and semi-formal conversation at the brunch sounds absolutely lovely. 
  • We don’t do godparents (where I live, it’s pretty much just a Catholic thing), but even my Catholic friends who do have/act as godparents are often not the legal guardian of something were to happen. I think it’s become more of a symbolic role for many people, but the meaning behind it is still important to them. Personally, if we were doing godparents, I would ask before the birth and probably just do what you’re doing. 
  • So not really godparents, but I straight up told (kinda asked, but not really) my brother that he would be legal guardian if we both pass away. That was kind of the end of that conversation..."hey, we're putting you down as guardian, are you ok with that". I talked to him probably a couple months before she was born. And we've done a few more legal/beneficiary stuff after she was born. 

    So while it's a pretty different scenario here, I'm still thinking it's appropriate to ask before! I would be clear that they would never be a legal guardian if you both pass, but would just be godparents in name/religious sense

    Also I tend to lurk TB, so if our regulars who don't make the jump still post and have questions, I'll be around 😉 
    Yes I would echo this. I was shocked to find out years after the fact that my spouse actually believed the kids would automatically go to whoever their godparents were in the event something happened to both of us (and our kids have different godparents so to even imagine I would split my kids up in different households is so wrong and there are obviously other issues here on so many levels that I won’t go in to it all here).  Anyways he claimed that the godparents of one of our daughters assumed the same as he did and so were prepared to be her guardian and it was not a great situation to have to clarify. I would hope that most couple’s communication is better than ours but it’s something I would make sure everyone involves is very very clear on. 
  • @happynapper my brother and I have different godparents and I think we would have been split up (not even in same state) 😬 I think my parents didn't want to burden a family with 2 kids. Thankfully it was a non issue. Not a choice we'll be making with our kids, but I know everyone's situation is different. 
  • @taylorharris0522 those cards are gorgeous!! I echo the sentiments, not a bad thing to clarify, and it seems like you are laying it out in a lovely way. 

    We haven't actually done the legal guardian stuff for our first kid and really need to pull it together 🤦‍♀️. I feel like we had our kids after everyone else and all my first choices are already someone else's potential gaurdians. We are second in line for our friends kids (lol we have some very prepared friends).
  • @jandawg As far as I know I never had a legal guardian officially. We have a huge family, aunts and uncles and both sets of grandparents. It’s the same for this LO. There will be a line of family waiting for them if anything were to happen to me and DH. 
  • I have a very new acquaintance (like, we met one time at the library) asking about coming to my baby shower. I’ve said several times that it’s just family and it’s far away and stuff. She’s just not invited. I don’t want her to feel like she needs to get me anything so I don’t want to just send a link to the registry unless she asks. What do I do???
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