The Great Question Thread

brookert615

For FTM to STM+, “dumb” questions, TMI, etc., ask them here!



*Edit to change title and add gif .

clearlyclara

My LO will have barely turned two when this LO will be born. I thought I would just babywear my 2nd and let my first use the stroller... But any moms with experience want to pitch in? Should I be getting a double stroller? If so, any recommendations? 

DDRRT1982

@clearlyclara if you can get a double stroller I would.  Babywearing is an awesome tool, but there are many examples of times you might need to put each in their own seat.  It can also be used as extra storage if you are wearing either of them.

brookert615

@BumpAdmin can we please get a sticky?

NYTino24

@clearlyclara Most moms near me have the City Select.

clearlyclara

@DDRRT1982 @NYTino24 thx for your inputs... My mom keeps telling me she only had a single umbrella stroller for me and my brother (only 18 months apart), but I guess it was different back then! Trying to do some planning... Maybe they will have some awesome black Friday sales. 

NYTino24

@clearlyclara Target, Walmart, BBB, and Amazon usually have baby clearance in July and January, so keep your eyes out then!!

craftywitch

@clearlyclara You could definitely get by with a single stroller and baby wearing, but would you want to?

kmj1426

@clearlyclara my first two are 2 years and 2 days apart. I loved baby wearing but I also loved having a double stroller for store trips. I had them in January so getting a tiny baby out of their car seat in the freezing cold was not ideal for me. It was so much easier to keep her warm and cozy in her infant carrier and put that in the stroller. We had a cheap Graco double stroller and it worked fine for us. 

clearlyclara

@craftywit well I'm also torn between getting a stroller that can convert to a double, or if I wait till this baby is 1 and my first is 3, then I can get the joovy caboose ultralight, which I feel we will use for longer... My husband is a minimalist so he wants to have less strollers. He already complains that we have two! (an umbrella stroller and a bigger one for everyday use) 

hopesup8

First time pregnancy. Feel like there is warnings for everything potentially dangerous to eat. Super sick today so only a milkshake sounded good. I’m usually a good check the books first but didn’t half way through I read it’s a no go for soft serve anything to calm my nerves? 

daffodil_shoe

@hopesup8 we are advised not to eat certain foods due to their potential for listeria, etc., which could harm the baby. So we’re not supposed to eat lunch meat, right? But have you ever gotten sick after eating lunch meat? Probably not. We aren’t told to stop eating fresh fruit and salad, but those things get recalled ALL THE TIME for food poisoning. So use your best judgment.

brookert615

Not sure if anyone can help me out here because I'm having a bit of a panic attack. I requested my blood test results from the lab. I got my blood work 10 DPO and turned a First Response test on 8 DPO. LMP was 5/10. Does anyone have experience reading these? The weeks make absolutely no sense? Blood work in spoiler. I am doing repeat blood work on Wednesday.

daffodil_shoe

@brookert615 the way they listed the normal values is odd. But your value of 37.4 on 10DPO is perfectly within normal range! They should have also done a beta on 12DPO to check your doubling time though.

brookert615

@daffodil_shoe Okay, thank you so much! Yeah, I really wish they did a beta 12DPO too.. it seems like most places do that. I'm really annoyed by how the lady at the front desk handled it. She was like " Let's repeat blood work next Wednesday to confirm if it's a viable pregnancy" she didn't even give me my numbers either! But thank you again, I really appreciate it! 

kmj1426

@brookert615 I am pretty sure they use fetal age (approximate date from conception) vs gestational age (approximate date from last period) when doing blood work because you won’t have HCG in your system until conception happens. I got a positive with my third at 8dpo and my dr told me at that point it’s extremely early and my levels would probably only be around 15. The only thing they truly look for is if your levels double after 48hrs because the number itself can vary so much. 

brookert615

@kmj1426 Okay that makes a lot of sense! Thanks for answering me !!!

daffodil_shoe

@brookert615 this is how my office list normal levels. My 10DPO was 32, and 12DPO was 88.


How many days days will it be between your first test and the next one you will have done? These values are more guidelines, what’s most important is that the value is doubling every 48 hours.

brookert615

@daffodil_shoe You are the best for sending this over and I'm feeling so much better seeing this! It will be exactly a week between my blood tests. I got my blood work last Wednesday and they want me to take it again this Wednesday.

daffodil_shoe

@brookert615 ok you’ll want your beta to be at least 425 on Wednesday then!

brookert615

@daffodil_shoe You're the best! THANK YOU so much for taking the time dealing with my crazy lol! 

DDRRT1982

37 is awesome for 10 dpo!  That’s bs about the viable pregnancy comment.  Mine was 22 at 10 dpo, which is still good.  In the past I turned a test at 8 dpo and my hcg was only 3.6.  Two days later it was 24.8 at 10 dpo, so if yours is even higher than that I bet you are more than doubling in 48 hrs.  I bet you will get a nice surprise on Wednesday.  The one week wait in between would drive me crazy. @brookert615

brookert615

@DDRRT1982 That's so wonderful to hear lol. I thought I was losing my mind. I really like this office so I think at my first appointment I might just tell the doctor that she put me in a crazy spiral! Thank you SO SO SO MUCH! 

agesandstages

Hello! I’m wondering if any of you have worked with a doula, and if so, when did you start? Thanks!

clearlyclara

@agesandstages I started interviewing doulas after my first trimester. My husband is the one that really wanted one... It was more to support him supporting me, if that makes sense. We interviewed about 4 and chose the one my husband liked most, lol. I also found one that does birth photography as well. Let me know if you have any other questions about doulas! 

oxaudox

  

oxaudox

This is my 2nd pregnancy. I swear I knew almost immediately when I conceived my first pregnancy. However, this one is much different. I hardly feel pregnant. No strong sense of smell or nausea. I've been getting heartburn, insomnia, slightly sore breasts, moody and increased urination. 

I've been extremely anxious, my daughter is 3 and I've wanted another baby since the second she came out

leksiL

@agesandstages I also worked with a doula last time and booked her in the second trimester. She did cpr class and did a few home visits before the birth. BUT she couldn’t come to the birth because we ended up with a scheduled cesarean due to breech presentation. Instead she gave us a day of babysitting. She also did a post birth home visit and was a lactation consultant. Not the hugest waste of $1000 ever but not a real use of our money. We are trying a vbac this time so will have a doula again but we will find some sort of way to make it partially refundable if breech again.

leksiL

For those with kids at home when are you telling them about the baby? My Bells repeats everything we say but also tends to make up things like that we have a moose in the house. After the first scan maybe?

superlina

@leksiL DD is only 16 month so she is not talking much yet and I am not sure she understands what's going on anyways. If she was older I would wait until we make it official and then start explaining it to her.

daffodil_shoe

@agesandstages I started looking after 1st trimester. We ended up hiring the first one we interviewed because we liked her so much. She checked in with me via text quite a bit, and did a home visit. The day of the birth, I honestly couldn’t tell you how useful she was or not. I was in my own little world of pain that I don’t remember much. I ultimately chose to get an epidural after getting stuck at 8cm for hours, and I don’t regret it one bit. I do not plan on hiring her again. Not because I don’t like her, but because a) I fully plan on getting an epidural this time because it was magical and b) I now work at that same birthing center so I know and trust every staff member, and I have a better understanding of when interventions are necessary.

@leksiL my 3-year-old was the first person I told! I had him wear a shirt that says “This boy is being promoted to big bro” to tell my husband. If he spills the beans, I’m just really not concerned. And if I miscarry, I want him to know why I’m sad.

um_thor

Question: Does/Did anyone use Ava for tracking when TTC or after? I still wear it at night and the last two nights I saw my resting heart rate went down. I know two data points is not a trend, but it’s been either steady or rising since conception, so I was a bit worried. 

@leksiL I’m not sure when we’ll tell my stepson, but we’re waiting until it’s further along. He just turned 7 and last year his mom had a miscarriage and he took it hard. He’s an only child and was so excited for a sibling.  But your LO is quite young I believe? So I doubt that’d be an issue. I’ll be interested to hear what others have decided! 

craftywitch

@agesandstages We hired a doula in third tri last time, but I’ve already booked her again this time. (Also reached out to our birth photographer and she said she was nearly booked for February, people must call her with pee sticks.)

@leksiL My toddler is almost 3 and we have talked about babies and siblings a lot, but we want to officially see a heartbeat before we tell him because he’s going to tell EVERYONE. He’s always been a talker.

brookert615

@um_thor Has your temp dropped with the RHR?

um_thor

@brookert615 nope. That’s still on the slow and steady rise. 

brookert615

@um_thor That's good! Not sure if any of the other girls want to chime in about RHR because I'm not helpful. All I know is that the temp staying risen is good. If you are worried, I don't see the harm in a quick call to your doctor though to ease your mind a bit.

bg122785

@leksiL I am telling my 6 year old daughter after the first scan on July 11th. She would most definitely tell everyone we saw, and will have to possibly come to my work after day camp a few days before the scan, so just  going to wait until then. 

robynlynn2000

This is my fourth pregnancy, and will be my third child. My daughter is 9, my son is 7, and we have already told them. Pros and cons, they do not hesitate when talking about "when the baby comes," but they are excited. This gives them a chance to get used to the idea of helping out, being quiet, new responsibility.

On the other hand, I do not feel pregnant. I have had several positive tests, after a couple negative ones. I didn't have a positove test until my period was almost 10 days late. So maybe its just not as far along. No morning sickness, soreness. Other symptoms come and go and may not be related, such as the one time I got sick, or had heartburn. My first appointment with my doctor isnt until July 17th due to scheduling issues and vacation time. At that point I should be right at 12 weeks.

My theory is that because I was on a hormonal bc, nexplanon, that maybe the rise in hormones just dont bother me as much. I had morning sickness with the other pregnancies, but I lost my first baby. I found out, during an ultrasound to check dates, that there was no longer a heartbeat. 

Hoping this one stays. But feeling pretty low lately. I'm too afraid to let myself get excited.

um_thor

Thanks for the reassurance, @brookert615  

and @robynlynn2000 I’m sorry you’re feeling down. This is my first, so I haven’t been through the experiences you’ve described... but I know the wait and anxiety are hard for me. Sending you tons of love and a cyber hug. 

robynlynn2000

Thanks so much. Like i want to be over the moon, like my husband and whole family seems to be. I just feel like impending doom is coming. But then I had a dream last night I was struggling to nurse a baby girl. And while the dream wasn't exactly a good dream, it felt very realistic. And my pbj I usually eat for lunch tasted like soap yesterday. So I must be headed in the right direction right? Lol

kbrown2385

Lurking 

@um_thor I am now 8 weeks and was tracking my bbt as well as my rhr up until 3 days ago. I had to stop both as it was causing me anxiety. Normally my rhr is in the low to mid 50’s. When I first got pregnant it was up in the high 60’s. It did start to decrease and recently dropped to 58. I freaked thinking it meant the worst. I forgot to ask my dr about it today since I stopped, but I did find online that your body gets used to the extra blood flow so your rhr can decrease again. How true that is, idk, but it’s on the internet so take it with a grain of salt.

Also, I’ve found that your bbt can also decrease. It should stay above coverline, but just beware that it could start showing a downward trend. I highly recommend just stopping both. Tw* I’ve had 6 losses so I thought doing both would reassure me. I was wrong lol.