@nomangos23 Aww, that's so sweet and so stressful all at the same time. I would say let your grandma host the 10 person shindig at the church and then see if you can get the other people to co-host a bigger one. Maybe keep the grandma one to just your close family and then invite them again to the bigger one?
@nomangos23 IMO it is your day honoring you and the baby, so it should absolutely be your vision! That being said I’m not one to rock the boat, so in your situation I’m not sure what I would do. Is there someone else who could maybe try to reason with her on your behalf? Maybe mention that with DH’s family included you just don’t feel right limiting the guest list to only 10 and reiterate that you have others more than willing to co host? Or maybe spin it to where she is the main planner, but “so and so” really want to gift you the rental space and someone else really would like to pay for the food etc. Im sorry you’re tasked with this and I hope you can come to an agreement that isn’t too stressful to you!
@nomangos23 what a sweet yet frustrating dilemma! I would definitely try to see if anyone else in your family can reason with her and if not, then I would try to spin it as her being the hostess, but others are "helping out". Let her help plan the menu, decide on decor with you, etc. so she feels like she is part of the process while still maintaining your vision and what you want. I hope you guys are able to work through it without too much compromise! It really should be all about YOU and baby boy!
*TW*
Me: 32 │ DH: 35 Married 8/16/13 BFP#1 DS 11/13/16 BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18 BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
@zuuls_mom@kiddiesandkitties@mamaber2204@duewithpu2 Aww you guys are the best. I know I'd get some super helpful feedback and thoughts. I love the idea of having her host something more intimate ORRRRR possibly a sip and see after the baby is here? Goodness knows I will want to keep that list short.
@nomangos23 You said you aren't religious, but are you getting baby christened? Would she want to host a celebration of that instead of a shower as something less stressful for you both?
(I'm not traditionally religious either, so o don't know of that is even a thing?)
Any tips for removing something that looks like black grease from clothes?
I got DH a brand new rash guard for our trip and it got stuck in the washer and got suuuuper dirty. I’m so freaking pissed, but I got about 90% of the stain out with Dawn and a little bit of elbow grease (at 5am 😳). Is there anything else I can try? I’ll have a bit more time tonight to try and work it out.
I have bought absolutely ZILCH for this new baby (not that we need a tremendous amount given I have all the "essentials" from my near 3 year old daughter...) but holy hell someone stop me from continuing to go to to TJ maxx & marshalls please - they have amazing deals on all of these ADORABLE Tommy Bahama dresses for my 3 year old for the summer, and mix & match separate pieces, for like $3.99-$12.99. I have bought everything in her size and I keep going back for more... and she has a June birthday so I know she'll get more clothes... I just can't help myself! The child can probably not repeat an outfit to school or camp all summer long at this point but I can't help it! I think I'm like secretly terrified this baby will be a boy and I won't be able to buy alllll the girly stuff I see forever? (not that I won't absolutely love a little boy, I'm just a crazy shopper!)
@MsBeachNJ haha, I've also bought absolutely nothing for baby and am feeling a little weird about it. This is boy #2 for me and I have everything from DS, so I honestly don't need to buy anything, but it still feels weird!
I'm having a rough mental health day. The news just has me down and social media seems to ramp up the anxiety around it. I've been rocking that extra serotonin high for a while and was so hoping to have it last longer.
I know I'm so lucky with my history that it has taken me this long to swing down, bug it still sucks.
@cheshyre319 I feel you on the negativity dominating social media. I am very invested in my stance on the current issue going on in Alabama/Ohio/Georgia and I feel guilty if I try to just “out of sight out of mind” it, but at the same time I know my mental health is taking a toll. I’m sorry you’re going through this, just know you’re not alone in this!
@lillywonderland BOWS TOTALLY COUNT! And btw, people always ask me how I got my daughter to keep bows on & not rip them off... its total commitment, she literally thought a bow was like a part of her head for the first few years of her life, if she was awake, she had a bow on, every.single.day.... now she never fights me on them, they stay in all day long, etc. and she loves them!
@cheshyre319 checking in. I’m so sorry you’re feeling down☹️ Sometimes there’s just too much out there to take in. I’m having days here and there like that. How are you doing now? Thinking about you!
@blitzybee thank you for the check in! I've been doing better with a social media hiatus, too many opinions on news. And I've reached out to various family and friends for distractions and they've been wonderful. I'm trying not to think too hard about how much is going to change.
I was going to start the Weekly Check in since @lillywonderland has jetted off on her tropical vacation and I think is the one who usually does it- but then I remembered someone asking about changing the questions up a little bit? Does anyone remember what was mentioned about changing some of the check in questions- and want to start the thread?
@RedBreast35 I can't recall what the changes were either, I think it was something to do with instead of FTM/STM/STM++ but I can't recall what it was going to change to? I don't think anyone would mind if we kept it the same for another week?
I am all over the place random today, so here ya go...
We're all approaching the lovely glucose drink appointment. If you have 1 appointment before then, ask your OB if they can give you the drink then so you can take home and refridgerate and drink an hour before your fasting appointment. Its way more tolerable cold and you dont have to wait around their office for an hour.
@nda_roxybabe That’s how it was done for me with my son. My issue is that I’m allergic to soy, and I remember that drink making me pretty danged sick. I’m going to be asking if there is any other way to do it. How is there only one drink option for something that we ALL have to do!?
Questions: What do you guys think about changing up our weekly check in questions a bit? Maybe the ftm/stm one could be something like tell us something your looking forward to as a ftm or something about your other children, team pink/ blue question could be tell us something about team pink/ blue project you want to do., like nursery theme, what your excited about for that gender.. just a thought idk haha. Might be fun to change up a couple of them!
A fun STM question could be along the lines of “what is something you wish you knew before giving birth?” or “what is something no one tells you about having a baby?” Love the idea of switching it up a bit!
@blitzybee I had bariatric surgery and can not tolerate the glucose test, so I had to stick my fingers at week 15 for 2 weeks 4x a day and will have to do it again at week 27. They made me do it twice since I have a higher BMI, but it’s possible you could get away with doing it once if you’re not overweight or higher risk.
@cmdesigner oh wow, that was quite the process for you! Jeeez! I tend to run low on blood sugars, but who knows what is happening at this moment in time.
Maybe each week we could do a diff ftm/stm question and team pink/ blue question. Love that question @duewithpu2 . I can start the thread in a little bit if it hasn’t been started yet.
I test sugars instead of the drink too. I know various doctors here allow it. Most for just a week officially. Some also do the OJ or jelly Bean thing although results may vary. I really like seeing exact numbers for food. My functional Dr has set a goal for me of 100 by 1.5 hours and it has really optimized my eating plan. I eat as much food just at different times and in different groupings.
@nda_roxybabe That's interesting that your doc lets you do it that way. My understanding is (and I'm no medical professional so I may be totally wrong here) that you aren't supposed to move around a lot after having the glucose drink. Not that you have to be still but they don't want you walking around much since it can effect the results (skew it better than it is). So sitting in the waiting room and getting up to just stretch now and then or go to the bathroom (esp for the 3 hour exam) is the most they really want you to do. If you drink it at home then do chores at home or walk to wherever your car is, then walk to the office, etc, it's not much "exercise" but more than if you are in the waiting room. Again, I'm no medical professional but I know they have always told me that they don't want us moving around too much. Luckily they do keep it cold for us at the lab when doing the test. Still sucks :-p :-)
@cmdesigner I had gestational diabetes with my last pregnancy and also had to test my sugar 4 times a day every day from about 29 weeks until 40. Suuuuuuuuuuucked! Esp because I have a fairly significant needle anxiety. Living nightmare :-p But I survived! lol Had an early glucose test this time around and passed it. Fingers crossed I pass the one at 28 weeks too!
@nda_roxybabe@LilyASF42 my office wouldn't let me drink it at home either, but they thankfully keep the drink cold. They actually gave me a 5 min max to drink it (and literally timed me) and had be go get the blood draw to the exact hour after I finished it. I was kind of surprised they were so exact about it!
@RedBreast35 Yip, same with me. They've always been very exact with the timing on the glucose tests. Also, they used to let you sip water during the 3 hour test (fasting test) but not now from what they told me this last time. Think the passing numbers may have also changed, too, but I'm not 100% certain on that.
@RedBreast35 same here, timed drinking and then wanted to take it exactly an hour after I finished. They also keep it cold, which is something (still yuck, but better).
@LilyASF42 omg at the idea of the three hour with no water!! I took the 3 hour last time (and passed), and they basically wouldn't let me move at all (just kept offering to let me lie down), but did let me drink water, which I was especially grateful for because they gave me the fruit punch flavor and I thought it was so much worse than the orange.
They had me do the 1 hour test early at 10 weeks because DS was over 9 pounds 🙄 I’m guessing they will have me do it again at 28 though. It’s much better when the lab keeps it chilled annnnd if they have the no-artificial-dye so that it’s clear! I’ve always had to do it in the office though, usually I drink it, then have my appointments, then draw blood.
At my 3 hour test a few weeks back, I was allowed to drink water. Which is great because all that sugar in the stomach is no bueno. I did my 1 hour early at 16 weeks, failed. Passed my 3 hr but barely. Get to take another 1 hr at 24 weeks. My dr doesn't test normal, non-high risk for gd patients until 28 weeks. I honestly want to be like just diagnose me so I get better with my eating habits!
Are any FTMs interested in an AMA labor / postpartum / newborn thread? Or is it too soon? I’ve been thinking lately about the things I need to have on hand postpartum...
@lillywonderland definitely YES from me! Are you thinking labor/postpartum/newborn exclusive to AMA? Because I'm 'technically' not (just barely!) but definitely would love a thread to get starting thinking all things post baby.
I am going to ask to just do the 3 hour glucose test and skip the 1 hour. I had GD with my first and am just planning that I will have it with my second (although I won’t mind being wrong)! I see no reason to take the hour hour as it is soooooooo subjective to time of day, what you eat that day, etc that I would rather just skip it and do the 3 hour to be done and accurate.
Me: 30 DH:31
Married 9/2010 TTC 10/2013 RE Help from 10/2014-10/2016 (11 failed IUIs, a corrective surgery, and a donor embryo cycle) 9/2016-transferred two donor embies BFP 9/29/26 EDD June 11
Re: May Randoms
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
(I'm not traditionally religious either, so o don't know of that is even a thing?)
I got DH a brand new rash guard for our trip and it got stuck in the washer and got suuuuper dirty. I’m so freaking pissed, but I got about 90% of the stain out with Dawn and a little bit of elbow grease (at 5am 😳). Is there anything else I can try? I’ll have a bit more time tonight to try and work it out.
I know I'm so lucky with my history that it has taken me this long to swing down, bug it still sucks.
Who needs a laugh today?!?
It is currently a smidge past 1pm here, and I just discovered that the undies I put on over 7 hours ago are inside out. 🤣
I'm trying not to think too hard about how much is going to change.
We're all approaching the lovely glucose drink appointment. If you have 1 appointment before then, ask your OB if they can give you the drink then so you can take home and refridgerate and drink an hour before your fasting appointment. Its way more tolerable cold and you dont have to wait around their office for an hour.
This is how my OB does it and it seems genius!
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
@nda_roxybabe That's interesting that your doc lets you do it that way. My understanding is (and I'm no medical professional so I may be totally wrong here) that you aren't supposed to move around a lot after having the glucose drink. Not that you have to be still but they don't want you walking around much since it can effect the results (skew it better than it is). So sitting in the waiting room and getting up to just stretch now and then or go to the bathroom (esp for the 3 hour exam) is the most they really want you to do. If you drink it at home then do chores at home or walk to wherever your car is, then walk to the office, etc, it's not much "exercise" but more than if you are in the waiting room. Again, I'm no medical professional but I know they have always told me that they don't want us moving around too much. Luckily they do keep it cold for us at the lab when doing the test. Still sucks :-p :-)
@cmdesigner I had gestational diabetes with my last pregnancy and also had to test my sugar 4 times a day every day from about 29 weeks until 40. Suuuuuuuuuuucked! Esp because I have a fairly significant needle anxiety. Living nightmare :-p But I survived! lol Had an early glucose test this time around and passed it. Fingers crossed I pass the one at 28 weeks too!
For my 1 hour, I drank it at home, wrote down the time then drove to the lab about 15 minutes before the hour was up. Failed by 2 points.
lol.
TTC 10/2013
RE Help from 10/2014-10/2016 (11 failed IUIs, a corrective surgery, and a donor embryo cycle)
9/2016-transferred two donor embies
BFP 9/29/26 EDD June 11