May 2019 Moms

Randoms Week of 1/6/19 - 1/12/19

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Re: Randoms Week of 1/6/19 - 1/12/19

  • Rounding back to the nanny vs daycare discussion- a GOOD nanny in our area starts at about $16-18/hour. Because DH doesn't work a typical 9-5 job and we could get by with 25-30 hours a week of the nanny, it would actually be much cheaper for us to get a nanny than to have 2 kids in daycare. Some people around us do Nanny Sharing as well, which save a lot of money. DH is adamant that we keep our kids in daycare b/c he thinks that DD is benefitting greatly from it. He thought that even at 6 months. Our 18 month old is a talkative, inquiring,  social butterfly (very different from both of us personalitywise at that age) and he attributes it all to daycare (along with her constant string of upper respiratory illnesses).

    With daycare, you truly get what you pay for, though. I nerd out on early childhood public policy (got my Masters in Public Policy with an emphasis on Social policy and took a bunch of classes in early childhood public policy). If you want to learn more about what the research says- this is a good article that examines the research https://slate.com/human-interest/2013/08/day-care-in-the-united-states-is-it-good-or-bad-for-kids.html. As a public policy nerd, my ONLY advice is to try not to fixate on the costs and focus on the quality of care/ quality of teachers as well. 
  • @chloe97 I totally agree about getting what you pay for (with exceptions, of course).

    DD's center has had one citation from the licensing board in the past 10yrs, and IMHO (I work in a different field that's licensed by the same entity and licensing compliance is half of my job) it was a bogus citation. The average teacher at her center has at least 15yrs experience and even the aides stick around at this center for an average of 5 years. They teach baby sign and Spanish and there's a genuine curriculum for even the littlest babies. They provide 2 meals and at least one snack, and it's actually stuff I would eat. The average parent for sure has a college degree and I would bet that about half have an advanced degree, which also elevates the level of her peers and their desire/ability to engage with the program and give feedback. Downside: not a lot of cultural diversity.

    This is in comparison to another center near us that literally runs dozens of centers in our metro and has ads on the radio. We toured because they had no wait list. They have a "curriculum", but it's more of a daily schedule than actually planned activities  They had had 3 licensing investigations in the past 6 months. The most senior teacher had been there for a year and a half, and there is a constant stream of "now hiring" ads in the window, so I don't think anyone sticks around. I watched the school age kids on the playground and there was a string of strong language and threats between kids that went basically unaddressed by the staff who were sitting socializing on a bench at the other side of the yard. They only serve lunch and maybe a snack, and the menu was all chicken nuggets and mac n cheese type things (delicious, but maybe not so nutritional everyday). They looked at me like I was crazy when I started to ask questions about how they handle breastmilk. It's 25% less than what we pay, but I wouldn't leave my baby there. 
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  • @expandcontract I think a daycare thread would be good. Do we also need a GD test thread? I think we talked about the test a while ago but I can't remember if my last BMB had one just for the moms who tested positive or also one for prep and results.

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  • It's so hard @optbaby2017 because daycare teachers make like nothing and so I can imagine that it's really hard to keep good people. DD's center is good and I have no complaints about it at all, but most of the teachers have been with the company less than a year. Though in all reality, it's also a 3-year-old center, so no one has been there that long. The way I judge is basically just how I feel about it and the interactions with the staff/.teachers when I pick DD up. We had been at our previous center (which we paid $8/hourly) and I had no issues with the center until one older teacher started who was always holding DD and rocking her when I came in. She obviously has mobility issues, which I get, but maybe then your career should not be in early child care? Anyway, she dropped DD once while changing her and another time DD had been sick and when she was leaving she told DD "I love you" and kissed her, which I found a bit too much for a child care professional (imagine if it was a man doing the same thing?). Anyway, after DD started walking and wanting to play- she has no interest in her (she still goes there one day a week) and when I get there, this teacher is sitting in the rocker every day, NOT playing with the kids or even interacting with the toddler.She seems to think despite it being an infant/toddler room, her responsibility is only infants. We moved DD to the center she's at 3 days a week now b/c we wanted more education focus, but this teacher being so crappy did not help. People encouraged me to complain about her, but I felt so guilty about risking her job, plus there is part of me that worries about retribution to my kids and as I mentioned we will send this LO there, b/c its MUCH MICH cheaper since he needs to be there fewer hours.         
  • @chloe97 So hard. I am so thankful that we earn enough that we can be picky. 
  • Instant Pot users!!!  How long would you set chicken breasts for?  I just pulled 4 out of the freezer, but they were frozen together so its currently a large lump of frozen chicken, not 4 separated frozen breasts.  
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  • I spent all day cleaning and organizing my bedroom. It normally only takes me an hour or two but ive noticed even simple tasks take double the amount of time now. Not to mention its hard to take down curtains and strip a bed with my stomach in the way. I feel much better now that its clean and organized and there is room for a bassinet/ PNP. After my drs appt tomorrow im going to start on babys room/ sewing room. I wish DH would agree to let me put my sewing stuff in his work out room (IMO theres enough room for both our stuff) so babys room can just be a nursery... maybe i can wear him down in the next coupl of months. 
  • @mcewen3 do you like your instant pot? I seen one at Kohls and that it would good in theory but wasnt sure how good it actually would be
  • **TW**

    The wake for our 4th grade student is tonight. I wish I could say this is the first wake I’ve gone to for a child, but I watched my little through BBBS bury her 6 brothers and sisters. This completely sucks and I’m an emotional wreck just waiting for it. 😭
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  • @justharrison Better to ask forgiveness than permission 🤷‍♀️


    @mrskoz428.  That’s so difficult.  I’ll be thinking of you and his classmates and family.  TW: in 3rd grade (in a very small school) one of my classmates collapsed in gym and died on the way to the hospital.  That following week at school and his funeral are still very vivid memories for me.  Hopefully it will be a time of healing for everyone involved. 
  • @mrskoz428 I'll be thinking about you today. Do what you can to make it through. We are all here for you  
  • @justharrison I have an instant pot and love it!
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • Guys, it was an open casket. 😭😭😭 omg that was awful. I’m just sitting in the parking lot crying.
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  • @fatmonica :D that had always been my philosophy!! If i could move his equipment and my sewing stuff i would have done it already. If he doesnt agree i might just do it after the baby is born. 
    @robyn2201 thanks! I might have to pick one up and try it. I have several crockpots but the instant pot seemed to have a lot more functions 
  • @mrskoz428 yikes I’m so sorry. That must have been so difficult. Sending hugs ❤️
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  • @mrskoz428 omg 😭 I'm so sorry. That's terrible.
  • @mrskoz428 Ugh! I’m so sorry!! 

    @justharrison I have a crockpot and never use it. So when people kept raving about the instant pot I didn’t understand the hype. But I sat down one day with my SIL and picked her brain about what it can do and make. I love it for chicken broth, beans and soups. And especially being able to throw in frozen chicken and have shredded chicken for tacos 30 mins later is awesome. 


    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • Just catching up with Bump as I had to procrastinate less.

    @mrskoz428 OMG!! How terrible. Thinking of you and sending you lots of hugs 
  • @kvh22. Come back to New England! 
  • edited January 2019
    @mrskoz428 So sorry again. Take care of yourself.
    kids with flags
  • @justharrison pretty much what @robyn2201 said.  I love that I can do so much with it.  I actually often use mine as a slow cooker (just one less appliance I have to have) since it works well for my schedule to throw something together in the morning to have for dinner that night.  But then there are days like today where we not only had activities in the morning but our morning was a complete and utter nightmare.  I didn’t even start thinking about dinner until 3:30 and we had to be out the door by 4:30 for my older daughter’s skating.  There wasn’t enough time to thaw anything completely and we needed to be able to eat fairly soon after getting home from the rink.  Enter Instant Pot.  I put the lump of frozen chicken breasts on the rack in the pot, poured some broth in the bottom for liquid and a balsamic marinade over the chicken.  Closed it up, shut the valve and set it for 25 min before we walked out the door (most recipes I found said 10 min for chicken breasts but because mine were frozen together I wanted to be sure they were done).   It does take about 15 min to pressure up then the clock starts ticking, but in the slightly more than an hour we were away that frozen lump cooked into a nicely seasoned pile of tender, fall apart chicken breasts.  I threw together some simple sides and a salad when we walked in the door and we were all seated and eating 15 minutes after I got home.  
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  • We received an instant pot for Christmas and have used it twice. Quite impressed so far. This is probably a better question for the recipes thread (I'll post it over there, too), but I would love some recommendations for recipes, especially of the minimal-prep and includes a side, style. 
  • @liliumstargazer13 we are between Utica and Syracuse, but closer to Utica. 

    @SpaceBurger I teach which helps, but not in the same school district. We ended up making ds1’s drop off at our friends house because the bus ride there is 45 minutes and that gives me enough time to get home. It works out too because if one of us has an appointment or meeting the other one gets the kids off the bus and we also arrange alternating play dates so that we can have some time to get things done too. His school offers before and after school care but it is still pricey. We do however use the day camps there when his school has PD days because they don’t usually match up with mine. 
  • Thanks @mcewen3 and @robyn2201 ! I might have to grab one! Could definitely use something that cooks quick on hectic days.

  • @mrskoz428 That's so hard and sad, hope your doing a little better.
  • Re: instant pot. I scoffed at the random number of functions. 9 in 1. or 8 in 1. But seriously, get the one that has the yogurt button and you can make your own delicious yogurt with two ingredients and pushing a button. We also use it for soups, pulled pork, one pot pasta and meatballs (from frozen), baked beans. We use it AT LEAST once a week. And it replaces your crock pot since it has a slow cooker function, but we do everything FAST.
    Me: 36 & DH: 40
    Married: November 2015
    DD 10/19/2016
    BFP:  8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
  • @lovelybabybumpz I want the one that hardboils eggs, too. 

    @mrskoz428 I'm so sorry for what your whole community is dealing with. Unfortunately, when I worked for Leukemia & Lymphoma Society, I went to way too many funerals for kids. There is absolutely nothing more heartbreaking. 
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  • I splurged on all kinds of cute baby clothes yesterday because the Osh Kosh store was closing and it was 40% off lowest price. I wish I could have bought more, but I don't know how she will grow. My niece was in 2T before 1 year and is in 4T and isn't even 2.
  • @mrskoz428 I can only imagine how difficult that was! Are you back in the classroom,  today? How are you feeling? How are the kids doing? Allow yourself to grieve some.  


  • I just got this coat on Gap.com for $21.96! It's only ok, but now I won't be freezing and didn't have to pay $98 for it. Win! I pick up some other stuff too, so even got free shipping. 😎



  • @liliumstargazer13
    I ordered the same one and agree it's just okay. I also tried the parka (pic below) and liked it better. But it's almost $50 with the current discounts, so... And I tried on the puffer one that Old Navy had and it was awful.
  • @optbaby2017 There's nothing like a "just ok" garment! Lol. I was psyched about the deal, so shared it with my office, and this teeny tiny co-worker says, "Aww! I should have given you mine!" What, for me to wear on one sleeve? I mean, I appreciate the thought, but there is no way ALL OF THIS, is fitting in anything she wore, and anyone with eyes could see that. 
  • Instant pot is great! We use ours multiple times a week. I love that I can saute in it too. Frozen chicken - tell me your magic. I put frozen chicken in and get tough, weird consistency chicken out, what's the secret? I love it otherwise though and do use the slow cooker setting often as well. There are some recipes I just prefer slow cooked. They're still good pressure cooked but better slow cooked.

  • @DuchessOfCambridge mine wasn’t too bad yesterday.  I put it on the rack rather than in the liquid (as I don’t usually love the consistency of poached chicken) and cooked longer than the times I was finding through my google searches.  When I searched everything said 10 min for chicken breasts but I did want more tender and also wanted to make sure they were all cooked (had bought a bulk pack and split into freezer bags so there were 4 chicken breasts frozen into one lump).   I used the Poultry setting for 25 min and let the pressure release naturally since I set it to cook while we were at skating.  When I first cut into them I thought they were a bit tough, but they all nearly shredded once I continued cutting so it was actually quite good.  If I were to do it again I would have had some additional marinade to toss the chicken in prior to serving.
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  • @expandcontract honestly, I’m better when the day is more normal. His classroom teacher went to the funeral and was able to come back to school. She said it was really nice but obviously hard. The kids were better today, as well. We cry when it hits us.
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  • imrachelleaimrachellea member
    edited January 2019
    @sleepy33 I'm pretty sure you can hardboil eggs in any of them! We have the original standard one and a larger 8 quart one (yep...2 😂). All you do is put in a cup of water and the eggs, pick how hard or soft you want them and time accordingly with a natural release. I do 4 minutes and they end up like the second one from the top.

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  • @mcewen3 thank you!! I'll try the rack!

  • I was going to say the same. Egg cooking isn’t a special setting just the standard pressure cook button. We also have two. The big 8 qt and a smaller mini 3qt. 
    Me: 36 & DH: 40
    Married: November 2015
    DD 10/19/2016
    BFP:  8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
  • So like, I started the Daycare thread but nobody's posted in there. Lol. I think I was the one who had started this thread,  if so,  should I change the title to "Childcare" so that it's easy to find, later? 


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