Weekday Randoms 4/2/18

hillbillywife

Happy Monday, ladies. What’s random in your life today?  

stlmegs

My niece is a trick baby.  She is seriously the most adorable, sweet, content little thing.  He spent 2 years being on the fence about trying for #2 for us (well, we both did), but after spending the afternoon with her yesterday, my husband hounded me all night last night about having a third.  DUDE.  You have GOT to be kidding me.  

morethanamama

@stlmegs haha, "one step (kid) at a time" ?? Easy to say for our husbands, we are the ones hosting these little aliens!

I'm recovering from news about our taxes. I know in the grand scheme of things it was better than expected. We sold a home and didn't pay taxes so we know that was coming, and my FIL's company made a lot more last year so consequently DH got more money in distributions. It's just so hard to see the money go! But I feel optimistic since our tax guy was proud of all the things we did to maximize our money and set a good base for this year. I'm a spender but now I'm excited about saving and being smarter with my choices especially with LO on the way

runsomewhere

Day 4 of antibiotics and miserable AF at work this morning. I suppose that's more of a bitchfest than a random but that's where I'm at today. 

stlmegs

@kissableviv EXACTLY!  It's really hard for me to think about getting pregnant again when I'm getting kicked in the cervix for the 465th time today.  lol.

@runsomewhere Oh man, I'm sorry you aren't feeling well.  I have some respiratory nastiness going on today too.  I haven't had to get antibiotics yet, but the next couple days will determine if I am headed down that road.  Hope you feel better soon!

millpe

Good morning ladies! My random dilemma is I have no idea what to do for a dresser for our nursery... my MIL bought us a nice crib for Christmas. It's a mid-brown color and really solid and nice. Well apparently its been discontinued so I can't get the matching dresser. Now I don't know what color or style to go with. I'm worried if I try to match it will be off on the shade and look funny, but I don't know what other color to go with that wont just make the room look like a mismatched discount furniture store  help!! 

zande2016

It snowed another 5 inches last night/this morning and I seriously couldn't deal with it. My sciatica pain was killing me and I had a headache and I was exhausted. I ended up sending my son to daycare and calling in sick so I could have some time to myself and sleep. Now I feel guilty after taking a much needed morning nap because my son has a cold and maybe should have stayed home and rested with me. The mom guilt just never eases up. 

@MrsMiller8588 can you see if the same manufacturer makes a dresser in the same color but different style? I don't think the furniture will look mismatched if the colors match. My son's crib is a hand me down my from niece, his dresser is from Ikea, and his book case was mine when I was a teen. All are slightly different shades of white and definitely don't match but I think the room still looks pretty put together. Let me see if I can find a photo...

edited to add photo...now sure how it will look on here since it's a panoramic, hopefully it doesn't look too huge, but my point is once the room is all put together, the mismatched furniture is less noticeable  

gingerbride26

@stlmegs wtf is up with husbands? our plan was to be done after this baby and now he's all like "well i think i'll wait a year to get snipped in case you change your mind" um dude no, my body can't take this again...
@kissableviv - sorry taxes suck - I did ours this weekend and we only owe $1300 which is a good year for us.  Thank goodness I'm so unhealthy lol medical bill deductions FTW!  Not looking forward to 2018 taxes, pretty sure we're going to be completely screwed with the new rules...
@runsomewhere - I feel you - i'm on round 2 of zpack now, and I was soo sick Sat night from it... not sure if it's the pressure front from this GD snow storm or the zpack but my sinuses are on fire today too

So I was chatting with DH this weekend and mentioned i felt we were just about out of our "rough patch"  - and he was legit shocked...he didn't realize when I talked to him back in Oct that I felt more like a housekeeper and nurse than a wife that this was a "rough patch" and not just a small thing that he immediately started working on (facepalm) so they really are that oblivious even when you have adult conversations on how you're feeling. 

edited to prevent additional post (this is why i get for starting a post then going to a meeting) - @MrsMiller8588 Agree with @zande2016 (BTW LOVE THAT PIC) and @TalesOfASocialIntrovert - we got a new white crib for DD, then moved our cheap white laminate furniture from our first place into the nursery and got ourselves new adult bedset.  I'm having a similar issue with DD big girl room though - we're reusing the guest room furniture to save $$ but it's all banged up and brown and her toddler bed is grey, I was going to paint/refinish it all but don't think I have time/energy.  I would say if you mix, go very different, agree that if the color is only slightly off it annoys/distracts me too.

TalesOfASocialIntrovert

@MrsMiller8588 I think the "mismatch" style works as long as there is a commonality between the items. So if you can't find the same color, find something with the same lines. Or different lines but same color (as someone else mentioned above, a different item from the same manufacturer). For DD, her crib was new but i didn't want to buy the match dresser bc of it being way too pricey. I found a changing table/dresser on Craigslist and painted it. The crib is white, the dresser is gray, and her rocker is natural wood. But the lines match and the fabric of the mattress, changing pad, and seat cushions all compliment so it works.

wildtot

@MrsMiller8588 we were thinking of getting an unfinished dresser we can paint the same as the ascent wall, maybe an option?

stlmegs

@gingerbride26 we are living in a parallel universe. lol.  Our plan has been for him to get snipped as soon as this baby is born.  Yesterday he was like, I think we should wait.  NO!  Schedule it now!  lol

gingerbride26

@stlmegs too funny.  Yet he also keeps looking at me barely able to walk and says things like "I don't think you should have another baby, I'm worried about you" ummm can't have it both ways... Maybe I'll just do mirena again for a few years - that arm one freaks me out...no idea why

BrittG13

I have a sore throat...I am so pissed. This will be the second time getting sick for me this pregnancy. WHY?! I should add that where I live it hasn’t been cold since January. It’s been in the 70s here. So I’m extra confused as to where this coming from. 

millpe

Thanks ladies! The brand of our crib is eddie bauer and it doesn't look like they have anything in the same color (I've checked). When I get home I might see if I can find the actual manufacturer and check if they have anything in the same color.  I am not crafty at all so i don't think I could successfully refinish something (and don't want an additional project). Brown is just so hard to match because there are so many shades! I'm also the worst decorator in general... lol

foxbaby2016

@MrsMiller8588 I think a white dresser with a brown crib would look nice and not mismatched at all. Something like this:


I would avoid trying to "match" the wood colors...it would probably be pretty hard to do that unless you can find something on the manufacturers website.

acunamatada

I gave my foster kitty back to his owner this weekend. I’m so happy for her but so sad to see her kitty go, he was such a sweetheart. One of my cats has been aimlessly wandering the house meowing for him 
In other news... We got a kitten to fill the void 
Picture of the little floof in spoiler

morethanamama

@acunamatada oh my, that's the sweetest face!

foxbaby2016

Me first thing this morning:
"Wow, I ate like trash this weekend. I'm going to eat REALLY clean for the rest of the week"

Also me this morning:
*Sees Easter cookies in the breakroom*....
"wellllll, don't mind if I do"
*takes two and has them for breakfast*

acunamatada

@foxbaby2016 that reminds me I have two baskets full of Easter candy in my car and a whole cheesecake in my fridge. Yikes. 

gingerbride26

we have so much Easter candy that DH's family gave to DD - dude she's not even 2! right now it's in a separate bucket way above reach, I think most of it is going to end up going in a bowl at work for my staff. @foxbaby2016 i could totally go for an easter cookie right now.... or some of @acunamatada's cheesecake... I just devoured 8 deviled eggs for lunch...now i want sweets

runsomewhere

@MrsMiller8588 I think that a mix of white and brown furniture could be super cute, like in the picture above. However, I totally get wanting things to match so if the manufacturer doesn't make anything in that same shade I'd get a dresser I liked and hire taskrabbit or some handyman to make it match. Sanding and wood stain can do amazing things. 

Thanks for the well wishes guys Apparently my immune system is sh*t during pregnancy and even a common cold can easily spread to something more serious. I'm going in for a followup appointment this afternoon. Before that I have an appointment at my OB's office. While everything should be ok they want to make sure baby is all good in there because the notes from the other doctor mentioned contractions and a tight, hard belly.  I'm a little stressed but thankful that I am getting thorough care. 

michelle_bird

Funny that ya'll mention that about your husbands - at my last doc appointment I saw a nurse who I hadn't seen since my first pregnancy. She basically told me that she recommends not deciding while pregnant or within the baby's first year to take medical action (tubes tied or snipped) unless it was already the plan before getting pregnant.  Her husband had his done right after their 2nd and she said she still regrets it and her youngest is 11 now!  

I brought it up to DH only to ask him if he thought he was definitely done after this one.  We're both on the fence about #3, but if either of us had been for sure against it I would have thought about this pregnancy differently!  

Also random - I've been really cold all day today.  Finally looked at the thermostat and it was 63 in the house!  Geez louise!  Switched that puppy to heat now.

wildtot

I’m getting snipped soon after because of my endo. It’s not a cure but it’s less of a problem and i am blessed have have two. I can’t imagine three or going through all this again. So I’m really hoping i can enjoy the early months more this time around. 

morethanamama

We are on the fence about #2 but not making decisions now. I don't think #3 is in the cards because of my age, unless we luck out with twins next time! I love twins. TBH 3 would be way too much of a financial burden, sorry to put it that way. I'm all for a bigger family but I know I can manage and be happy with 2:)

michelle_bird

@kissableviv - I actually told DH that I don't think we could afford a 3rd until DD was in public school.  I'll be 38 when she starts Kindergarten, so #3 may not be in the cards for us either!

runsomewhere

@wildtot I hope you get to enjoy the early months this time around.

@kissableviv we're in the same boat regarding #3, financially, plus my age (I'll turn 35 before I deliver this LO), I just don't think it's in the cards. I'm thrilled and beyond thankful to have two but I am a little sad about this being it. I just don't feel 100% done. 

I've been thinking about it a bit recently and trying to really savor this pregnancy.  These are some of the last weeks I'll ever be in the second tri of pregnancy, so I treasure the kicks, the growing bump, all of it

noideawhatshesdoing

Neither of us are signing up for #2. I really don't want to do this again, tbh, I'm not enjoying this whole pregnancy thing as is. Plus all unplanned and has sent our previously planned intentionally childfree lives into a tailspin. We've been working really hard at saving for a long time and were planning to "retire" early in 5 years to build and run our inn, and that clearly isn't happening now. But, I'm also not really willing for either of us to do anything permanent at this stage. So probably looking at using an IUD.

 Just for clarification, we're not unhappy, just still in shock and probably going to take actually holding the baby for either of us to start to feel less blindsided by everything.

hillbillywife

My H keeps teasing my about wanting a 4th. I’ve been emotionally thin these last couple weeks and thinking about taking care of 3 kids is overwhelming and 4 I think would really truly push me over the edge. It’s not nice to do that to your wife lol. 

I also think it’s okay to mismatch furniture. It is really hard to match brown shades. We just built my daughter a bed and it’s white, but her dresser is brown and it belonged to my grandma and my mom before I got it. I’ve gone back and forth about painting it but it’s in good shape so I don’t want to fix something that’s not broken. 

runsomewhere

@noideawhatshesdoing I totally get where you're coming from. While DH and I never had firm plans for a child free life, that was what we were leaning towards and there was no talk/thought of babies. My DD was a huge surprise and we thought having her would totally changed the course for our lives. 

Of course our lives changed but it wasn't for the negative and it wasn't as drastic as we expected. By the time she was 1 I wanted to do it all over again. Life is funny like that. 

Either way, I totally get the feeling of getting hit with an unexpected change. 

hillbillywife

@noideawhatshesdoing I understand the shock. I get hit with it every so often and I totally signed up for this. It’s okay to not like being pregnant. I also,obviously, don’t know anything about your finances but idk why you couldn’t reevaluate your goals, put a new timeline on them and still reach for the stars. Kids are pretty portable and flexible if that’s the lifestyle they’re used to. I think it’d be awesome for them to get to experience being part of building an inn and running it! 

gingerbride26

@noideawhatshesdoing DD and this pregnancy were 100% planned but I still had times where I felt/feel like "wtf am I doing childfree/1 kid was working so well...why rock the boat??", I've also hated almost every moment of both of my pregnancies, but watching DD grow and learn is pretty awesome and despite not being a touchy-feely standard maternal person...kid cuddles and hugs are the absolute best.  You'll find your groove, and I wouldn't write off the inn plan just yet! 

runsomewhere

hillbillywife said:

Kids are pretty portable and flexible 

Yes! So true! 

morethanamama

+1 for children being portable and flexible, I'm not really reevaluating any major thing in my life aside from maybe moving out of state in the near future but that's not something that I was set on doing anyways and DH likes it in California. We are only children who thought we would be childfree or maybe having one, hence why we waited and we are glad we did. We really lived it up since we met, traveled, did any activity we wanted, so we are ok with a change and are working hard to not making it too drastic.

With that said I totally understand some pregnancies are not necessarily planned and that can bring about mixed feelings. I've loved being pregnant but I've had it easy...and there are still 14 weeks+post partum to go!

noideawhatshesdoing

@runsomewhere @hillbillywife @gingerbride26 Thanks for the encouragement ladies. We know there will be plenty to love about being parents, it's just been a total 180 from what the plan was. We had finally found the exact piece of land we wanted to build on and were going through the motions of the purchase and working with our builder when we found out we were expecting. Plus I had finally gotten my mom and grandma to understand that not only was I happy, but my life wasn't, to use their words, "meaningless and empty" without children.

I completely agree, kids are portable, but to do what we want we'd have to move out of the best school district in the state to an area we'd likely have to homeschool because the town is less than 400 people and is one of the worst school districts in the state.

Not against making the adjustments that we'll need to make to do what's best for the kid, we'll happily do that, just still trying to figure out how to get my mind wrapped around it. It will mean the inn will have to wait another 18 years or so. Plus my mom is one of those women that claims she loved every second of all of her pregnancies, and I just do not related to that. Not that I hate it, but not enjoying it either. If that makes any sense.

wildtot

Trying to catch up here, it’s been a busy day at work.
If this is your first I’d say don’t make any permanent decision just yet. I had a horrible pregnancy with DS and even two years later ppd gets the best of me sometimes. I swore i would never have anymore kids because who would want to go through that hell again?! I didn’t know if i could do it again mentally and physically. DS wasn’t easy with all the colic and acid reflux. But after moving out of state away from our families i felt sad that he would have no relatives to play with. DS was “planned” but sooner than we wanted due to my endo and again this one was planned last minute. My odds of conceiving were better the first 6 months after surgery do that’s what we had to do. We made a lot of big financial and career changes but at the end of it it has worked out. 
Pregnancy is not easy and I don’t enjoy much of it either. I’v never been an affectionate person but i will never deny the cuddles, kisses and even farts from DS. He’s the one i will kiss forever until i annoy him lol. Kids are super adaptable, never doubt them. 

paytonpedro

@MrsMiller8588 Have you looked on amazon for the matching dresser? Sometimes they still have some after the brands discontinue. If they don’t I would say just get one of the same color. Doesn’t necessarily have to be the same brand. We were in the same dilema with getting my DS a new bed. We don’t have the bed yet (it’s coming this week!) but I think the color will match. If not, this dresser will travel with the crib to the baby and we’ll have to find a new dresser for my DS1. Regardless I have to buy a new dresser, but they still carry the one we have. 

cseley321

@noideawhatshesdoing I hear you on the school district issue. I am having a similar dilemma... our current district is awful. Not the WORST, but we will not be doing our kid any favors. With that being said, we could pick up and move, but if we just wait a few years when the car is paid off, we will be in such a better position to buy a nicer home. When we originally bought this house, we had pretty much given up on children. However my husband got a job with benefits that covered infertility and IVF, so now here we are on #2. With all that being said, would private school be an option? I know there are a ton of drawbacks, but it may be worth looking into as well. There are a few hidden gems that I found out about in my area that are good schools and are not as pricey as the others..

AFM I finally bit the bullet and bought a crib set for the new baby. Now when it comes in I need to start picking out valances, paint, wall decorations, etc.... Everything is starting to get so close. 

I am thinking of actually designing and painting my own canvas art since there is nothing matching online. I am so out of practice though...

morethanamama

@cseley321 I think it's really cool you can do your own art! I'm completely hopeless at projects and anything creative.

Well, I got so much grief for requesting a pat down at the airport. Like , wth, it's a free country! Haha. TSA agent was clearly lazy. Also my TSA pre check didn't register in the stupid American Airlines app so I had to take all my work electronics out. Theeeen they pulled my luggage aside because of TORTILLAS. Hahaha! Finally on board on the way home and the lady next to me has a stuffy nose. Praying I manage to fight the germs or maybe it's just allergies. 

cseley321

@kissableviv doesn't your husband work at Blizzard? Maybe he can contract someone out? There are bound to be a lot of artistic types floating around... it could be pretty cool

wildtot

@kissableviv i don’t get the drama TSA gives pregnant women. Like it’s seriously not that much harder to do. Wishing you a good immune system! 

wildtot

I spy an entertaining Nov thread...