The killer is that this woman has been pregnant! Twice! Promise me I won't get that kind of amnesia after the kiddo emerges.
Unfortunately I made a terrible comment to a pregnant lady, after I had TWO kids. This woman worked at the library I go to multiple times a week, so I guess I thought I "knew" her and it was ok, but she looked very pissed lol. I said something like "when are you due? Everytime I see you, you get bigger and bigger!" Now everytime someone says something rude to me, I think back, and really regret saying anything to her at all.
The killer is that this woman has been pregnant! Twice! Promise me I won't get that kind of amnesia after the kiddo emerges.
Unfortunately I made a terrible comment to a pregnant lady, after I had TWO kids. This woman worked at the library I go to multiple times a week, so I guess I thought I "knew" her and it was ok, but she looked very pissed lol. I said something like "when are you due? Everytime I see you, you get bigger and bigger!" Now everytime someone says something rude to me, I think back, and really regret saying anything to her at all.
Aw, don't feel too bad. You're so sweet I'm sure she couldn't stay mad for long! I have things I fee bad about too. I remember telling a friend a few years ago "you barely look pregnant!" I thought it was a complement then, but after hanging out here I realize it can be really hurtful. I also remember making a big fuss about how an 8 months pregnant friend was "such a trooper" for dancing at our wedding, when I now know she'd much rather have been left alone to have fun doing whatever she felt comfortable with without me making a fuss.
+1 to getting comments but also to trying to wrack my brain and think back if I ever made these comments to pregnant ladies. I know people think they are being nice and complementing when they say "you look so cute" "you can't even tell you're pregnant" but that makes me sooo uncomfortable and, honestly, not how I FEEL at all haha!
@Xstatic3333 I guess we probably all say or do things accidently. Maybe I'll try to not get so annoyed by the comments I get in case they really are "innocent" lol
The killer is that this woman has been pregnant! Twice! Promise me I won't get that kind of amnesia after the kiddo emerges.
You won't. Some people just honestly don't think despite having been pregnant or having kids. It's like they aren't sure what to say around pregnant women and they overcompensate and stupid shit comes out? It doesn't make a lot of sense. Some comments are really not meant to be bad, but come across bad.
ETA: Posted before I was done and words are hard.
BFP #1: DD born on 08.25.12
BFP #2: 09/08/15 miscarried at 6w
BFP #3: DD2 born on 02.07.17
I too didn't realize that the "you don't look pregnant" line could be hurtful until this group either. Although I still couldn't help saying it to a friend of mine. She's 5 weeks behind me and just kinda popped at 28 weeks. She had def gained some weight, but if you had never met her before you wouldn't know she was pregnant. I felt bad as soon as it came out of my mouth. But also just couldn't believe how she wasn't really showing at all. Thankfully we are friends and I really hope she wasn't offended.
I would never comment on someone I don't know. But I am learning it's best just to not comment at all unless it's to say You Look GREAT!!!
My mom kept asking me what my doctor said about my weight. I assumed she was thinking that I had gained too much weight. Finally she said, you just look so small. That was a big eye opener for me. You never know how someone is taking what you are saying.
PS. My full panel of my maternity jeans no longer will stay up. The belly has beaten the pants.
Me: 36, H: 37 FTM, 2 Furbabies married 03/17/07 lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC due: 2/15/17
I had a cute and overly talkative 4 year old look at my belly today and say "whoa, why is your belly so big." I like to joke with them and say I swallowed a basketball. Should have seen his eyes. He has a baby brother so it isn't like this is something new to him!
Coworker asked how many days I had left...I said 6 weeks. *thumbs up*
@krob I was just coming to post in here and see if you were involved in the train derailment in NYC today. Seeing no mention of it, safe to assume you and H are fine?
We have our hospital tour tonight and I'm looking forward to it because I've been totally salty about my insurance switching its partnership (or whatever) from where I delivered DS (which is 5 min away and secular) to a Catholic hospital across town. I'm hoping tonight goes really well and I love it and get over my gut reaction!
+1 to plz stop commenting on how big/little pregnant women are. I've had people ask if I was going to be able to keep baby in until the new year (well, I hope so. She's not due until February.) or ask if I'm having twins. It really rubs me the wrong way-- I get it. I'm big. I'm carrying big. But i havent gained a damn pound this pregnancy, I just look huge.
It is doubly hard on me bc I was bigger to begin with before getting pregnant. I don't really need to hear everyday how fat I am. And I'm worried abt her growth with this stupid GD so I don't need comments reminding me to be worried and anxious.
I'm also guilty of saying stupid shit before I ever entertained getting KU. Man, I cringe when I think about it. I said the awful "oh, are you sure it's not twins? Haha" ::throat punch deserved::
The worst thing I can think of that I did was a few years ago at my SILs shower. They did that stupid game with the TP and you are supposed to guess how big around they are. Well I did it and I swear it could have fit around like 5 people. I must have like doubled it up without realizing it, bc I wasn't implying she was enormous. They still bring it up too and I still feel bad about it!
I swear to god if one more sick person walks into my classroom this week I'm going to flip out. STAY. HOME. I live in one of 8 states with "extremely high" concentrations of the flu, and if I get the flu here in the second half of my already-miserable third trimester, there is going to be hell to pay.
Anyone else having their placenta encapsulated? We decided to do it, because if there is ANY chance it can curb PPD and help with milk supply, it's worth it to me. )I have a history of anxiety, and I am worried about PPD.) My sister did it, and she said it really did help - the few times she forgot to take her pills, she was kind of an emotional, bitchy mess until her H asked whether she forgot to take them.
Just bought a cooler online specifically for it, since it seemed weird to use one that we pack beers in for the river in the summer...
@madamerwin - I am doing encapsulation too. My Mom and MIL never heard of it before so they were like HUH? when I told them lol. But from all I have heard about it preventing PPD and enhancing milk supply, Dh and I both thought it was a good idea.
I've gotten a lot of comments about my size the last two days. A lot of "you didn't even look pregnant before Christmas break and now you do!!!" Umm... yep... I am.
I already feel huge, I don't need anyone else commenting on it. The only thing I don't mind is if my two best friends haven't seen me in a while they'll say something about oh she's growing! Etc. maybe it's because they're my best friends and I know they aren't judging my size, maybe it's because how it's said it's more a celebration of a growing healthy baby and not my size. Idk but that doesn't bother me. But acquaintances or strangers- heck no they better not say something!
We have our hospital tour tonight and I'm looking forward to it because I've been totally salty about my insurance switching its partnership (or whatever) from where I delivered DS (which is 5 min away and secular) to a Catholic hospital across town. I'm hoping tonight goes really well and I love it and get over my gut reaction!
Good luck! I'm in the same boat - we switched hospitals from DDs birth. I'm very nervous. Our tour isn't until the 12th!
For me the most of the annoying comments do come from moms - not my friends or coworkers who don't have kids. Even my mom and sister keep mentioning how if I think I'm tired now, just wait! And they have said it at multiple different times, and always with such joy. I don't understand it, I'm sure they remember what that felt like on the other end of it...
I had a coworker who was measuring way ahead and was induced because of size and I was telling her about how she was still adorable and not even like a whale of a pregnant person and people walked by and were like "damn perra thats harsh" but like I was saying she wasn't a whale
My contribution to today's verbal diarrhea discussion:
One of our board members (female, at least) just walked in while I was standing at the copier and said "Welp, you look pregnant from behind now!" WTAF.
Grr! Maybe take a look at her behind and say, "Darn! I was hoping it would go away after my baby is born. Guess not!"
@kswiger06 The September 17 board is already the biggest cluster fudge. Literally there are separate posts for LAB results like hcg and progesterone levels. I had to come back here just to quiet my brain
@lap018 I kept peeking in there, waiting to see your intro. Hopefully the board will smooth out once it's going for a few weeks. I did see there was a sudden increase in threads today though lol. You will have to gently guide them to the organized side
@kswiger06 The September 17 board is already the biggest cluster fudge. Literally there are separate posts for LAB results like hcg and progesterone levels. I had to come back here just to quiet my brain
Congrats @lap018! Totally organize the crap out of that place.
My contribution to today's verbal diarrhea discussion:
One of our board members (female, at least) just walked in while I was standing at the copier and said "Welp, you look pregnant from behind now!" WTAF.
Grr! Maybe take a look at her behind and say, "Darn! I was hoping it would go away after my baby is born. Guess not!"
Oh man, if only she wasn't 1/4 responsible for my annual pay raises! My actual response was a stunned, awkward ......thanksssss?..... but she totally didn't get it.
Thanks everyone!! I am over the moon! a little anxious but taking it one day at a time. It may be a mess over there right now, but I'm so excited that I'm just in a love/hate relationship with the craziness, at least til we see/hear a heartbeat
@lap018 I did a wee bit of intro stalking and there are definitely some other pro-organization forces there you can rally. We'll be thinking of you and rooting for a happy, healthy pregnancy!
Yesterday i had a really productive day, i got up early(ish) went into town & bought all my bits & pieces for the hospital, came home & assembled my pram (stroller), unpacked from being away for the holidays, made dinner & looked at flights & accomodation for a wedding in germany in may. Today i feel like a potato! The only thing i have done is sign for our new dryer which got delivered today! Its now 4pm & im fighting with myself to go get in the shower! So lethargic & general cant be arsedness.
Yesterday i had a really productive day, i got up early(ish) went into town & bought all my bits & pieces for the hospital, came home & assembled my pram (stroller), unpacked from being away for the holidays, made dinner & looked at flights & accomodation for a wedding in germany in may. Today i feel like a potato! The only thing i have done is sign for our new dryer which got delivered today! Its now 4pm & im fighting with myself to go get in the shower! So lethargic & general cant be arsedness.
You did like triple work yesterday, that gives you at least 2-3 days of laying around to recover
Ordered my glider so it'll be here next week!!! We're supposed to get a snow storm this weekend and I really wish H didn't have to work because it would be great to finish the couple tasks left for the nursery. Of course it's stuff I can't do my myself (move a desk out and assemble a bookcase). I want to get the house cleaned up but I'll probably just end up sitting in bed wrapped in blankets the whole weekend. Here's to hoping baby stays in this weekend and these sporadic BH don't turn into anything more.
Our forecast calls for snow this weekend, too. I live in an area where we RARELY get snow (like, the [somewhat minimal] amount of snow we've received this season is a 20 year record), so I'm now virtually convinced the baby is coming this weekend, because of course it is.
We have the snow storm right now. We are the only school district that is open right now, it pisses me off. The drive is soo going to suck, cause it is suppose to snow all day. Why they did not cancel school, I do not know, but I want to hurt somebody.
Re: Weekly Randoms (1/2)
ETA: Posted before I was done and words are hard.
I would never comment on someone I don't know. But I am learning it's best just to not comment at all unless it's to say You Look GREAT!!!
My mom kept asking me what my doctor said about my weight. I assumed she was thinking that I had gained too much weight. Finally she said, you just look so small. That was a big eye opener for me. You never know how someone is taking what you are saying.
PS. My full panel of my maternity jeans no longer will stay up. The belly has beaten the pants.
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
@krob I was just coming to post in here and see if you were involved in the train derailment in NYC today. Seeing no mention of it, safe to assume you and H are fine?
Thanks for checking on us!
FTM, 2 Furbabies
married 03/17/07
lived in Houston, Austin, Los Angeles and NYC
due: 2/15/17
It is doubly hard on me bc I was bigger to begin with before getting pregnant. I don't really need to hear everyday how fat I am. And I'm worried abt her growth with this stupid GD so I don't need comments reminding me to be worried and anxious.
Man, I cringe when I think about it.
I said the awful "oh, are you sure it's not twins? Haha"
::throat punch deserved::
Just bought a cooler online specifically for it, since it seemed weird to use one that we pack beers in for the river in the summer...
like a whale of a pregnant person and people walked by and were like "damn perra thats harsh" but like I was saying she wasn't a whale
First BFP: 12/16/13
EDD: 08/23/14
Baby BOY born: 08/29/14
Ben and Maggie - 4/10/09
Mia - 6/16/11
Surprise! due 2/23/17
Married: 9/2013
Love my LEO!!
TTC #1: 9/2015
BFP: 2/1/16 MC 2/8/16 @ 5wks
BFP: 5/22/16 RAINBOW BABY
EDD: 1/30/2017 *IT'S A GIRL!!!!*
Kirsten Grace 1/20/17
Married to my Soul Mate since 09/06/09