We just got home from our tour of the birthing center. Does it make me a bad mom that I'm upset that they got rid of their nursery? I don't think I'll mind him being in the room with me, but if I have a particularly rough delivery, I'd prefer him to go to a nursery so I can be rested for him.
Not at all. I think the whole "baby friendly" model they have in hospitals now is bullshit.
Maybe this is a UO, but I FULLY support rooming in in hospitals. I agree it is ridiculous that a nurse wouldn't be able to help you bathe the baby (if there's a tub available to you, there's one available to her, no?) but taking a newborn who just experienced trauma and shock and putting them essentially by themselves is pretty cruel. Initial bonding is so, so, so important! That teeny tiny person has NO idea what's happening and the only emotion they can really feel that early on is fear, so it's REALLY important that they learn mom is a secure comfort. I am fully aware I am going to be exhausted and at my wit's end, but it's one of those things you kind of just have to get through, like the labor itself. I will reiterate: a nurse refusing to help is completely inappropriate. If that is a true story, that woman had every right to complain. ETA: I'm not judging. The research is pretty new but it's mind-blowingly consistent. Culture is always slow to adapt but soon this will be as normal as the belief that women should have the right to vote. It is also important to point out, while initial bonding is very important and definitely ideal, OBVIOUSLY the health of baby and mother are more important.
All fair, IF hospitals appropriately staffed to accommodate the needs of mothers and babies after the close of their nursery. A baby who isn't able to be properly cared for because mom can't properly care for herself, much less, a helpless infant, isn't good for anyone, at all. What, I think, really needs to happen is education of families about the reasons why they feel this is better and then the option for mom to choose to use the nursery or not... Not forcing actions based on a view that has differing opinions. And, let's face it, the hospitals' opinions on the matter are also driven by profit, in addition to patient care.
@annabenanna We did that costume last year and it was great! H wouldn't dress up either, but it was fine. I just had the blond wig and a dragon costume for the baby. But then I also got a dragon costume for the dog and put a toy dragon on my shoulder. It worked out great! I still need to figure out what we are going to do this year
@bnsmith85 when I went for my breastfeeding class, the lactation consultant tied rooming in with fostering successful breastfeeding, along with skin to skin and other changes they're making. She discussed the importance of learning hunger cues, etc. I'm not sure exactly how the nursery would be helpful anyway when baby is eating every 1-3 hours. Anyway, I'm all for rooming in. For one, personally I don't think you could pry this child from me after he's born. Second, it just makes logical sense to me for the baby to be in the same room with the mother if neither are sick/compromised. If the baby isn't sick, they don't want them away from the parents and in with other babies, some of who could be. Obviously the nurses are still there and (supposed to be) helping with this new transition. For example, during the first hour when skin to skin is done, my hospital has stork nurses who sit with you the entire time to make sure everything goes smoothly. I agree that it should be the norm unless there's a need for the baby to be separated. And I don't know about elsewhere but my hospital still has a nursery, there was even a baby in it when we did the tour, the mother can send the baby to the nursery if she chooses, but it is encouraged to room in. I definitely don't see a problem with that.
@bnsmith85 when I went for my breastfeeding class, the lactation consultant tied rooming in with fostering successful breastfeeding, along with skin to skin and other changes they're making. She discussed the importance of learning hunger cues, etc. I'm not sure exactly how the nursery would be helpful anyway when baby is eating every 1-3 hours. Anyway, I'm all for rooming in. For one, personally I don't think you could pry this child from me after he's born. Second, it just makes logical sense to me for the baby to be in the same room with the mother if neither are sick/compromised. If the baby isn't sick, they don't want them away from the parents and in with other babies, some of who could be. Obviously the nurses are still there and (supposed to be) helping with this new transition. For example, during the first hour when skin to skin is done, my hospital has stork nurses who sit with you the entire time to make sure everything goes smoothly. I agree that it should be the norm unless there's a need for the baby to be separated. And I don't know about elsewhere but my hospital still has a nursery, there was even a baby in it when we did the tour, the mother can send the baby to the nursery if she chooses, but it is encouraged to room in. I definitely don't see a problem with that.
Agreed re: having the option. But I think there should be a choice, not a forced decision around rooming in. My hospital sounds similar to yours (minus the stork nurses) in that, rooming in is encouraged but if you feel like you just can't, you can send the baby to the nursery. I don't know what my choice will be. It will honestly depend on how I feel after delivery. I think of this like I think about BFing. A fed baby is best, just like a cared for baby is best. However a woman feels they can accomplish that best should be accommodated, within reason. And, I view the purpose of the nursery as being there to handle situations like the one described in the article. So instead of cleaning up a blowout (when previously that day you had to be supported just to walk to he bathroom because of risk of fainting from blood loss/fatigue) you can focus on feeding the baby and taking care of yourself only... So you can heal and be better for when it's time to discharge.
I have no problem with rooming in.... I just don't like that it's forced. While baby's needs are obviously very important, a drained mother is useless to her baby. I planned to keep him with me, I just don't like that I don't have the option to send him to the nursery if I need to.
@bnsmith85, yeah DH doesn't like GOT! He's not a fan of fantasy-type tv shows. Ha. So he refuses to dress up as any GOT cast member.
@ingoscj , ah good idea on the dragon on my shoulder! I'd dress the cat up as a dragon, but I don't think she'd forgive me or keep it on for more than 5 seconds.
Paging @Kaessi! I went amazon prime shopping on Saturday night when I decided I was going to do the maternity session. I had no choice but to shop on amazon because where else could i get something delivered in 1-2 days?
I found a bunch of stuff that would work, but more importantly I found a lacey one for like $16.99 that I think would work... I know you're looking for a more boho type look, but for $16.99, it might be worth trying.
I bought these, and probably returning one of them. Depends on how they fit:
@annabenanna Those are all gorgeous & very similar to the style I'm looking for too. I'm about to go on an amazon shopping spree on my lunch break! Thanks for the tip!
@Kaessi, i put in "maternity photography dresses" lol.
I wanted to update you too! That green dress fits small (I couldn't zip up a small), but that beige/mocha one is PERFECT. I actually just bought another color today for my girl's weekend this weekend. The mocha one is an awesome neutral. I got it in small and it fits SO WELL. Not tenty despite being flowy.
On on a funny note, I searched Amazon for "long lacy dress" and the first hit I got was definitely not a long lacy dress. Instead, on my work computer, I see a large picture of a woman in crotchless panties and lingerie with cutouts for the boobies & everything on display. Yikes!! I couldn't X out fast enough, lol. Oops.
Re: Weekly Randoms 08.01.2016
What, I think, really needs to happen is education of families about the reasons why they feel this is better and then the option for mom to choose to use the nursery or not... Not forcing actions based on a view that has differing opinions. And, let's face it, the hospitals' opinions on the matter are also driven by profit, in addition to patient care.
My hospital sounds similar to yours (minus the stork nurses) in that, rooming in is encouraged but if you feel like you just can't, you can send the baby to the nursery. I don't know what my choice will be. It will honestly depend on how I feel after delivery. I think of this like I think about BFing. A fed baby is best, just like a cared for baby is best. However a woman feels they can accomplish that best should be accommodated, within reason.
And, I view the purpose of the nursery as being there to handle situations like the one described in the article. So instead of cleaning up a blowout (when previously that day you had to be supported just to walk to he bathroom because of risk of fainting from blood loss/fatigue) you can focus on feeding the baby and taking care of yourself only... So you can heal and be better for when it's time to discharge.
@ingoscj , ah good idea on the dragon on my shoulder! I'd dress the cat up as a dragon, but I don't think she'd forgive me or keep it on for more than 5 seconds.
Paging @Kaessi! I went amazon prime shopping on Saturday night when I decided I was going to do the maternity session. I had no choice but to shop on amazon because where else could i get something delivered in 1-2 days?
I found a bunch of stuff that would work, but more importantly I found a lacey one for like $16.99 that I think would work... I know you're looking for a more boho type look, but for $16.99, it might be worth trying.
I bought these, and probably returning one of them.
I wanted to update you too! That green dress fits small (I couldn't zip up a small), but that beige/mocha one is PERFECT. I actually just bought another color today for my girl's weekend this weekend. The mocha one is an awesome neutral. I got it in small and it fits SO WELL. Not tenty despite being flowy.
Here's the link to that one: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B018X81J5U/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o00_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Here's the green dress link: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B019RQUN0O/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Here's the lace dress link (also going back, it fits so weird on me, I think because I'm small, you'll need a slip underneath for this one)
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01CEBQAVU/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s01?ie=UTF8&psc=1
On on a funny note, I searched Amazon for "long lacy dress" and the first hit I got was definitely not a long lacy dress. Instead, on my work computer, I see a large picture of a woman in crotchless panties and lingerie with cutouts for the boobies & everything on display. Yikes!! I couldn't X out fast enough, lol. Oops.