Don't get me wrong... I am happy to see all these people starting families... but when is it my turn?? My little cousin got pregnant by accident... and I'm the only one in my immediate family able to have kids (so I think I can) and just not able to conceive...
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME??!!
I find my self sometimes crying my self to sleep thinking that I'll never have my own family....
Eight Million. That's the number of people I know who are currently pregnant. Co-teacher just announced she is due in Feb. I WANT MY TURRRRNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Someone gif this out for me. Where are the wine truffles? This girl needs wine truffles.
(is cursing allowed in here, because sometimes I'd really like to use a sailor word)
@BumpCaitlin@BumpTara@BumpAdmin could you please unpin this post? It is often the first post newbies read, and then the posts that they really should have read first are not getting read. Please and thank you!
me 30; DH 35 TTC since May 2014. Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d. Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1). AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR. RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW. Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining. Short LP (8 days). Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
It's very difficult to get pregnant for me and my hubby as well, it's very hard for me to be overly happy for people as well, hang in there!! Our time will come soon, and stay positive and optimistic will help!!
I too feel the same way. I've had 2MC and 1 SB. So I often wonder why not me. Looking around at my friends ans family it seems like everyone is having babies, but me. I try to be patient and wait for God's time, but I can be very impatient. Just letting it out. I know I'm gonna be ok
I feel the same way, two women at work are pregnant, my sister in-law is pregnant, my friend is pregnant, and I'm just sitting back like it don't bother me but it does, hoping for a bfp this cycle
I'm 30 and I've been TTC for 4 months and have been a bit of a perfectionist in charting, taking OPK's, making sure the timing is perfect etc. to the point where when I realize I'm not pregnant that month I feel such extreme disappointment and failure. Two of my closest friends have also just announced that they are pregnant with their second babies - of course I am so happy for them, but I also can't help but feel so jealous and even further disappointed. I find that a good cry on the shoulder of my husband really helps to just let go of the frustration and pain, after which we will go out for a really nice dinner and wine, just the two of us. The charting/temping process carries on and I take comfort in the fact that things are at least happening in my body and that eventually it will happen for us.
Hello all! I'm new to this board and just wanted to share my feelings/thoughts since I can relate to many of these posts. I'm not sure if anybody else feels this, but all my closest friends are all of a sudden pregnant. I know its not a race to who gets pregnant first and I am not trying to compete. I actually feel even more pressured to get pregnant soon because I would love to have a baby close in age to all my friends new ones on the way. Every month I see the negative I just feel like UGHHHH!!! another month down the drain! plus I try to be on a super strict diet and eat healthy, no coffee or alcohol or anything that might interfere with conceiving. The first few months I got a negative I just went a ahead and have my cup of coffee and drank alcohol when I wanted. But now I cut all of it out even after seeing the negative. I even cut off my hubby from his regular beer every night lol. I hope it happens soon and to all of you! best of luck!
This article was so helpful... Just found out that the coworker who is next door to me is five months along and has only been married six, and I've been trying for nearly a year... Trying to keep my head above water!
I get mad/hurt and feel that I was supposed to be having a baby with them, my belly should be that big, too!
I have this same feeling. I have a friend due the same month I was due and it's hard to see her and know that I should be there too. And I have a friend who got pregnant after me and she is getting big and showing too now. And I am happy for them but it does make me sad. But then I think, it will happen again for us and we will be just as happy and big as them. It isn't a race and we will get there too! Good Luck TTC!
We've been TTC for 4 months/4 cycles now (soon to be going into the 5th). Each month AF shows up I've been disappointed, but managed to redirect my thoughts into positive focus for the cycle ahead. This cycle, though, I seem to be struggling more. I definitely let myself get my hopes up. Still no AF (but 2 BFN), & I'm feeling pretty emotional & discouraged about it. So many of my closest friends are either currently pregnant or at home with their beautiful babies, & none had any issues getting pregnant (most managed to conceive after their 1st cycle trying, or "accidentally" conceived). I'm surrounded by much of the same with the girls at work. I am so happy for all of them, but I keep finding myself questioning, "when is it my turn?!"
I find this board SO helpful. It's comforting to know I'm not alone & that many of you are experiencing the same things I am, & feeling the same things that I am. In a way, we're all in this together. Honestly, on the days when I'm feeling as down as I am this morning, logging on here & reading everyones messages is the one thing that makes me feel better. It's such a great community!
I feel like everyone around me is pregnant and as much as I want to be happy for them, I m so jealous. Some of them are not even trying or living a healthy lifestyle and boom, just like that. Felt good to let it out. (
In my head I know this is not okay... But my heart... Just can't help it: when I go out for a run and a woman with a stroller passes by me, all I can think Is how much I hate her for being on "MY running path with her stupid baby". This is terrible. I am fully aware. My next thought is 'how did I become this bitter selfish girl...'. Then I start to wonder if maybe I don't have a baby because God is punishing me for being so awful. But then... I wouldn't be so awful if I just had a baby. But then... Our character is defined by how we deal with problems and hard times, not easy time. Oh the sick sick cycle of thoughts that occur inside a desperate woman's head. I can say that because I'm one of them. So many crazy thoughts. Oh how this process has changed me. How do we NOT become bitter!? It used to come and go. But... It's sticking around longer and longer each time. What if it turns into forever. Feels good to let it out though. If I said any of these things to someone that hasn't had trouble trying to conceive, they'd never speak to me again. This problem of infertility is alienating.. Isolating. So... Thanks for being a safe place so this isn't all bottled up inside.
Married May 2014 TTC Nov 2014-Aug 2016 Aug 2015 Dx: Thyroid Cancer and Hashimotos Total Thyroidectomy October 2015 Ovarian Cystectomy Nov 2015 CANCER FREE and resumed TTC Dec 2015.
Well said @gardeniagirlknits I go through the same thought process almost daily. I have a coworker who talks about her young children daily. I try so hard to tune her out by it's usually impossible.
@dogmomwantinghuman i have a co-worker who complains about her children daily, in my head i'm saying "at least you have children" meanwhile i'm trying my hardest to get pregnant. grr frustrates me!
I myself miscarried at nine weeks while I was in the doctors office. I got to hold my baby which was only the size of my finger tip. It is something I will never forget. Everyone around me is pregnant and even the lady I nanny for is due two weeks before my due date. It's extremely hard for me and I am at a loss. My husband says he isn't ready and may not be for awhile. I just don't know how to deal with this and feel like I have no one to talk to.
@Bishop16... Hugs. Probably there is nothing I can say to make any of that 'better', and in my own experiences, I've found that well meaning positive words from people that have no idea how it feels Is more harmful than helpful. I'm so sorry you feel alone.
It sucks when dh can't face something that you desperately want to discuss and process. I was diagnosed with cancer while ttc... My husband doesn't deal with it all, leaving me alone emotionally, even though he is technically 'here'. We can't discuss cancer without him shutting down, much less how to move forward with ttc post surgery. I know our situations are different and I can't possibly understand your feelings regarding the trauma you've experienced. I only know how it feels to feel like your facing something alone when your partner has his own way of protecting himself emotionally. It sucks when your ways of dealing with trauma are completely different.
Cry when you want to. Talk about it if it makes you feel better... To anyone and everyone. Decide on something you can do in memory. You shouldn't have to suffer in silence and hide your experiences unless you want too. Scream it from the rooftop if it helps you to feel more connected and not so alone. Whatever will make you FEEL... Do it. Screw it if it makes anyone uncomfortable.
Just don't get numb. That's when the dark gets really dark. Feel it and find someone to feel it with you... If it's not your dh, then your mom, your best friend, a pastor... Anyone that will just let you have the moment to not be alone with your despair.
Big big big big gigantic hugs. I am so so sorry. I'll think positive thoughts for you because I know it's hard to think of them yourself. I wish I had the magic words.
Married May 2014 TTC Nov 2014-Aug 2016 Aug 2015 Dx: Thyroid Cancer and Hashimotos Total Thyroidectomy October 2015 Ovarian Cystectomy Nov 2015 CANCER FREE and resumed TTC Dec 2015.
@gardeniagirlknits thank you so much for your words. I do talk to my husband about it and I know he is just as hurt as I am I mean he was already picking baby names. I think he just isn't ready for us to try for another child because he is scared. I do talk about it mainly to my mother and I do cry when I am driving home from work or before I go to sleep.i have peace of knowing my child is in a better place but it is still hard. I am sorry to hear about your situation as well that has to be difficult. Men do tend to deal with things a lot different then we do so if you ever need to talk I will listen and give advise the best I can . May God keep you at peace and help you to stay strong.
I've been trying to get pregnant(again) for about going on 3 months. and I see all these women walking around pregnant that can't take care of the kids they already have..
This is me. My DH and I have been going through ups and downs during our TTC and it seems like everybody else around us are popping up pregnant. Everywhere I go I see mom's to be glowing with bumps and even though I'm happy for their miracle, I'm just a tad bit jealous. Maybe more than a tad.
I even had two encounters that just made me want to punch something. 1 instance was overhearing a conversation between two Friends about another that was going to have an abortion. Like I literally saw red. There's a whole community of women that pray and plan and track for a child and you're just gonna.... I can't even finish it.
Anyways at the end of the day I have to just remember that patience is key, God has a plan and my time for my family will come. Just claim it ladies. We're all going to be wonderful mothers.
I haven't eaten lunch in the staff lunchroom all year... kind of avoiding it because of the constant pregnancy/ baby talk ( 3 preggo and almost everyone else a new mom- I kid you not) I'm eating in my classroom and keeping to myself to avoid awkward questioning/ comments about DH and I...I just don't need the constant reminders about the situation.
Me:35, DH 37 ~ Married July 2014 ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp) bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease) ttcal May 2016
I won't rant about how everyone around me is getting pregnant (they are)... So here are my tips...
1. Find some hobbies! I've been spending tons of time gardening this summer and I finally got back into Yoga. Yoga is great because it helps take away a lot of stress from TTC. I also think of it as a way to prepare for being pregnant, because it makes my body healthier and stronger. I highly recommend regular Yoga practice. I've also been looking into starting horseback riding again too, which is something I won't be able to do while pregnant (I do jumping) so I should get as much as I can in now!
2. Spend time with someone who isn't TTC. I have a close friend who is in grad school and definitely not TTC anytime soon. When AF comes around, her and I spend some quality girl time with a bottle of wine
3. Reading everyone's stories on these forums helps so much! It seem like all my pregnant friends made it happen on the first try, so knowing that I'm not alone, and that it's normal to take several months is very reassuring
4. Celebrate success stories! I have 1 friend who took 2 years to conceive and another who had 3 MCs before having her rainbow baby, and they both were finally able to get pregnant and have healthy babies. Their stories give me so much hope
Me 34 DH 36 Married since July 2010 MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
TTC #1 since June 2015 Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved. Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature 5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP! May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019 July 2019 - FET - BFN Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
@ReesaAnne16 it was definitely a change of pace to read your message. DH and I have been trying for 9 months now and it doesn't get any easier. Just found out that my younger sister-in-law who wasn't trying is pregnant. Really hits hard but I will definitely cherish your words of wisdom to take my mind off of it.
Today has consisted of a woman in my office legit freaking out with joy because her son just texted her that he and his girlfriend are pregnant. It's her first grandchild and she is expectedly thrilled and so happy she's crying. It's all anyone is talking about. I'm happy for her, I really am. But I'm a tad jealous #:-S
TTC History:
Started dating DH 2006 . Married 2015
TTC July 2015-November 2015
BFP November 2015 Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021 MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
@GoldenTMama I'm exactly the same, conceived in April but went for a scan at 11 wks as was concerned but the baby's heart had stopped beating at 7wks 6days so had to have a d&c, that was in June. We were heartbroken and threw everything into ttc again, I'm now 4dpo on my 2ww so really hoping it's happened this time. My sister is 1 wk ahead of where I should be and I find it sooo hard seeing her. Good luck and big hugs xx
I've been sad that I haven't gotten pregnant yet, but have tried to keep in mind that the right little spirit will come along when the time is right. I have several friends and relatives who are pregnant and that makes it hard since we've been trying for a long time but I've not skipped any showers because if the situation were reversed I wouldn't want them to be so sad that they skipped mine. Besides I can go home after and be all bitter with a glass of wine.
Today has consisted of a woman in my office legit freaking out with joy because her son just texted her that he and his girlfriend are pregnant. It's her first grandchild and she is expectedly thrilled and so happy she's crying. It's all anyone is talking about. I'm happy for her, I really am. But I'm a tad jealous #:-S
I hear ya! Hugs to you and hopefully the next baby news that gets everyone excited at your work will be your news! Hang in there!
I work as a Rn on the OB floor so people are literally pregnant all around me (ps I do love my job). Plus a 4 coworkers had babies in the past year and 3 more are pregnant now. On top of my sister in law and my teenage niece being pregnant. I know a few of them have been through the struggle and many of my patients as well, but it's still hard hearing all the happy news constantly around me. I had my miscarriage in May and now I feel like the wait is even harder then it was before that.
I just hosted my cousins baby shower yesterday. I miscarried early August. It was hard to host this shower knowing I would of been in my 2nd trimester & I'm not. And my other cousin just found out she's pregnant. And two of my friends are pregnant as well. It's hard. It does feel like people think oh you miscarry and it's done. I never knew you don't just lose a baby in a day and you're done. Sure, you look fine on the outside, but you're miserable inside.
Sorry for your loss @MellBabyPeeps that must have been a hard party to attend.
Me 34 DH 36 Married since July 2010 MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
TTC #1 since June 2015 Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved. Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature 5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP! May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019 July 2019 - FET - BFN Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
Is it bad that I just wanna delete all my friends on fb that are pregnant. Don't wanna delete fb. Just my prego friends.
Or the fact that I regret telling my mom we are TTC. Now everytime she sees me, she tells me I'm KU. "You're glowing sister" "Your head hurts, oh you're KU." "You're upset, you must be pregnant." The list goes on. I swear, she's a constant reminder of how I'm not KU. Sometimes, I wonder if she wants me to have a baby more than I do. So frustrating.
@4fairydust I had to look it up as well. It's in one of the earlier post that one should read before reading any other posts. And before anybody gives me trouble about it. I had read it, but it's information overload that I couldn't recall every single abbreviation. But to answer your question. KU = knocked up
@AshleyGemini24 I hear ya about deleting fb friends with pregnancy announcements. I feel the same way. There's just so many out there and the most recent ones are from those who weren't even trying or not ready at all for it and that's the hardest ones for me.
It's been almost 5 weeks since my d&c so seeing people announcing they're expecting is still hard for me. Don't get me wrong, I am happy for them, just still sad about it. I personally know 14 women that are expecting right now, and a few of them are due the same time I was
My 18 year old little sister just found out she is pregnant with twins. She still lives at home and doesn't speak to the father. And here I am, still TTC. I'm just going to drink my wine and pray that this month is the month
My 18 year old little sister just found out she is pregnant with twins. She still lives at home and doesn't speak to the father. And here I am, still TTC. I'm just going to drink my wine and pray that this month is the month
Re: Pro-tips on How to Deal When Everyone Else is Pregnant
WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME??!!
I find my self sometimes crying my self to sleep thinking that I'll never have my own family....
Co-teacher just announced she is due in Feb. I WANT MY TURRRRNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Someone gif this out for me.
Where are the wine truffles? This girl needs wine truffles.
(is cursing allowed in here, because sometimes I'd really like to use a sailor word)
TTC since May 2014.
Aug 2014 BFP, EDD April 22, 2015. Low progesterone, started suppositories. Loss at 5w6d.
Nov 19, 2015 BFP at 13 dpo, EDD July 29, 2016. MMC discovered 12/29 (9+4). Natural miscarriage 1/16 (12+1).
AMH results 0.42, 1.2; FSH 12.1, AFC 10, dx DOR.
RPL testing results normal. Nurse recommended progesterone suppositories in TWW.
Clomid + trigger + TI cycle August 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Femara + trigger + TI cycle December 2016 - failed. Thin lining.
Short LP (8 days).
Acupuncture & Chinese herbs starting January 2017, lengthened LP to 10 days
Summer 2016 LFAF awards:
Winter 2016/2017 LFAF awards:
SaveSave
Married May 2014
TTC Nov 2014-Aug 2016
Aug 2015 Dx: Thyroid Cancer and Hashimotos
Total Thyroidectomy October 2015
Ovarian Cystectomy Nov 2015
CANCER FREE and resumed TTC Dec 2015.
~Formerly @dogmomwantinghuman ~
TTC #1 since January 2015
BFP #1: 11/30/15| MC 12/16/15BFP # 2: 6/2/16 | EDD 2/16/17
It sucks when dh can't face something that you desperately want to discuss and process. I was diagnosed with cancer while ttc... My husband doesn't deal with it all, leaving me alone emotionally, even though he is technically 'here'. We can't discuss cancer without him shutting down, much less how to move forward with ttc post surgery. I know our situations are different and I can't possibly understand your feelings regarding the trauma you've experienced. I only know how it feels to feel like your facing something alone when your partner has his own way of protecting himself emotionally. It sucks when your ways of dealing with trauma are completely different.
Cry when you want to. Talk about it if it makes you feel better... To anyone and everyone. Decide on something you can do in memory. You shouldn't have to suffer in silence and hide your experiences unless you want too. Scream it from the rooftop if it helps you to feel more connected and not so alone. Whatever will make you FEEL... Do it. Screw it if it makes anyone uncomfortable.
Just don't get numb. That's when the dark gets really dark. Feel it and find someone to feel it with you... If it's not your dh, then your mom, your best friend, a pastor... Anyone that will just let you have the moment to not be alone with your despair.
Big big big big gigantic hugs. I am so so sorry. I'll think positive thoughts for you because I know it's hard to think of them yourself. I wish I had the magic words.
Married May 2014
TTC Nov 2014-Aug 2016
Aug 2015 Dx: Thyroid Cancer and Hashimotos
Total Thyroidectomy October 2015
Ovarian Cystectomy Nov 2015
CANCER FREE and resumed TTC Dec 2015.
I even had two encounters that just made me want to punch something. 1 instance was overhearing a conversation between two Friends about another that was going to have an abortion. Like I literally saw red. There's a whole community of women that pray and plan and track for a child and you're just gonna.... I can't even finish it.
Anyways at the end of the day I have to just remember that patience is key, God has a plan and my time for my family will come. Just claim it ladies. We're all going to be wonderful mothers.
ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp)
bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease)
ttcal May 2016
MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN
April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo
June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved.
Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature
5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP!
May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019
July 2019 - FET - BFN
Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues
Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy
July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
TTC July 2015-November 2015
Baby boy born August 2016
Oops BFP February 2021
MMC March 2021
Back on BC for a year to decide what we want to do.
TTC Since March 2022
MMC June 2022
BFP September 2022 - Due June 2023!
It's hard. It does feel like people think oh you miscarry and it's done. I never knew you don't just lose a baby in a day and you're done. Sure, you look fine on the outside, but you're miserable inside.
MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN
April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo
June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved.
Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature
5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP!
May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019
July 2019 - FET - BFN
Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues
Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy
July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
Or the fact that I regret telling my mom we are TTC. Now everytime she sees me, she tells me I'm KU. "You're glowing sister" "Your head hurts, oh you're KU." "You're upset, you must be pregnant." The list goes on. I swear, she's a constant reminder of how I'm not KU. Sometimes, I wonder if she wants me to have a baby more than I do. So frustrating.
KU = knocked up