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PinkPuffyHeart2

subliminalrabbit said:

Now. Wtf is going on with your H? If you went back to work could he work less? Is he currently working more than 40 hours per week? What would you do for child care?

I'm sorry. ((hugs))

He would not work less if I went back to work. He may work over 40 hrs but not by much. He manages a vitamin store. We would have to put k in daycare or hire a sitter, whichever was more cost effective. We have no family that can watch her. Saying things would be more "even" was his backhanded way of saying I don't work. Ever since I became a SAHM he has developed an attitude of superiority toward me... It's reaaaaally getting old. We both decided I would be a SAHM because that is what we both wanted, and now he is telling me he is super stressed and that would be resolved if we had a double income.

ETA: sorry, he said he is stressed, tired, and depressed. All of which would be resolved if I went back to work. He also said he's had chest pain from the stress but refuses to make a drs appt... That really ticks me off and I yelled at him this morning because hello... You had a heart transplant, chest pain could be something serious, you have a wife and child to think about, go to the dr NOW. He said he wants to wait until his annual in March. I could kill him.

JANCANDANCE

The Katy Perry song "dark horse" makes me wanna be a stripper. I'd be a damn good one IMO. Bringing out my inner stripper lmao.

PinkPuffyHeart2

ChicagoChic82 said:

PinkPuffyHeart2 said:

subliminalrabbit said:

Now. Wtf is going on with your H? If you went back to work could he work less? Is he currently working more than 40 hours per week? What would you do for child care?

I'm sorry. ((hugs))

He would not work less if I went back to work. He may work over 40 hrs but not by much. He manages a vitamin store. We would have to put k in daycare or hire a sitter, whichever was more cost effective. We have no family that can watch her. Saying things would be more "even" was his backhanded way of saying I don't work. Ever since I became a SAHM he has developed an attitude of superiority toward me... It's reaaaaally getting old. We both decided I would be a SAHM because that is what we both wanted, and now he is telling me he is super stressed and that would be resolved if we had a double income.

ETA: sorry, he said he is stressed, tired, and depressed. All of which would be resolved if I went back to work. He also said he's had chest pain from the stress but refuses to make a drs appt... That really ticks me off and I yelled at him this morning because hello... You had a heart transplant, chest pain could be something serious, you have a wife and child to think about, go to the dr NOW. He said he wants to wait until his annual in March. I could kill him.

Uhg... Douchecanoe. He needs to put on his big boy pants!!!!!!! Since you both agreed staying home with the little darling was the best idea, he just has to deal. But if you feel like being more sensitive to his whines, maybe you could strike some kind of deal. Such as: "right now I am still BFing and would like to continue doing so exclusively until sweetie is 1 year old. When she turns one I will begin looking for a job..."

Thanks @chicagochic82 I have told him I want to wait until she is at least a year old. He flip flops back and forth. In one breath he says he wants me to stay home and in the next he says he wants me back at work. I don't want him to stress because of his heart condition but at the same time I feel like slapping him. I had a talk with him this morning and told him he either needs to seek help via counseling for his stress and depression (and I'm more than happy to help set up appts for him or whatever) or he just needs to get over it and deal. Cause we are all tired. We all have things we don't want to do. But we have to be adults and do them. (This is in reference to another argument we had bc he hasn't shoveled our driveway and its under about 2 feet of snow. I can't shovel it bc of my bad wrists and he knows that... But won't do it because he doesn't want to deal with it because he is so stressed out)

No longer the best

@PinkPuffyHeart2 I know its different for us because I"m in Canada so I'm still on mat leave and while the pay isn't great at least it is money coming in  But I tend to throw it back in his face.

I tell him that when I go back to work he is going to be shocked how much more work he has to do around here!  I will be working during the day so ALL household duties will have to be split, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the animals, all kid/pet appointments, watching the baby, getting up in the MOTN with the baby, grocery shopping, all other errands.  It will be WAY more work for him when I go back.  I might point that out if I were you!

Otherwise I'm thinking of you!! 

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PinkPuffyHeart2

No longer the best said:

@PinkPuffyHeart2 I know its different for us because I"m in Canada so I'm still on mat leave and while the pay isn't great at least it is money coming in  But I tend to throw it back in his face.

I tell him that when I go back to work he is going to be shocked how much more work he has to do around here!  I will be working during the day so ALL household duties will have to be split, cooking, cleaning, taking care of the animals, all kid/pet appointments, watching the baby, getting up in the MOTN with the baby, grocery shopping, all other errands.  It will be WAY more work for him when I go back.  I might point that out if I were you!

Otherwise I'm thinking of you!! 

Lol I had this conversation with him last night, almost verbatim. He said he was fine with that... When in reality, Pre-baby, when I worked more hours than him, I still did all the housework minus dishes. I still did all the pet care and appts. I also took care of all the bills.

No longer the best

@PinkPuffyHeart2 I'm just spiteful enough that I would consider going back to work and riding him SO HARD about picking up the slack and doing his share until he admits its better for me to SAH.

I warn DH ALL THE TIME that if things aren't split more evenly when I go back I will just quit because it's not fair! I'm not missing all that time with LO AND being a slave at home. Hell to the no! 

tiffletons518

It's 3:30. I'm still in my pjs watching a Property Brothers marathon. I should probably shower and think about dinner at some point. Sandwiches for dinner anyone?

PinkPuffyHeart2

libberluru said:

@pinkpuffyheart2 Do you want to go back to work? What did you do before? It would suck that you change everything in hopes of him changing, and he is still the same guy. Maybe you could take in a kid or two and be a small in home day care? I know you love on your baby so much, it would be a tough transition at this point to leave her 40 hrs a week.

Thanks for understanding! I do not want to go back to work, mainly because I think LO would have a hard time with it... But who am I kidding, I would have an extremely hard time with it. I want to be with her 24-7. All of my life I wanted one thing: to be a mom. This is my dream come true. This is my goal in life. I'm not career focused at all. I am family focused. (Not saying you can't be both, just saying I am not both)... My job was at an animal hospital. It was very high stress and demanding. Not sure if I would go back to that or try to find something else. I am very open to watching other kids but my h is nervous about that because of germs. He has a suppressed immune system due to the meds he is on for his heart transplant and if he gets sick it can be serious. I think it would be fine as long as ppl keep their sick kids home. He probably comes in contact with more sick ppl at his job than we would watching kids. (he works at a mall) But I can't watch other kids until k let's me put her down for naps anyway. haha

PinkPuffyHeart2

@Cl8badb hang in there. I hear things get easier after your 15th trimester.

PinkPuffyHeart2

I call my female dog buddy! And I call my dd "bubba" a LOT....

PinkPuffyHeart2

Yes @subliminalrabbit that's a great point. Financially, we probably would not be tons better off with me at work... I would prefer our own sitter/nanny and they make more $ than I ever did.

PinkPuffyHeart2

Although, a former coworker gets in home daycare for $25 a day. If I could do the same, then financially we would benefit by me going back to work.

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tiffletons518

Just watched a car blow up its motor in front of my house. We are the second house from the corner and a little Focus was trying to turn. You hear him revving trying to go with no luck, and then the car dies and smoke comes billowing out from under the hood. He's now blocking the intersection causing another car to get stuck.

HeartLikeMine3

Our house is a wreck I just sat on the couch and stared at it for a good 20 minutes. I'm so lazy today.

phishgirl29

My MIL came over with a frozen chicken for us. DH told her to take it back because he and I don't have the time to pick it apart after it's cooked. She then began her "when I had you and your sister, I used to bake chickens, pick them apart, and watch you two while your father did zero. You only have 1 kid. I hope you don't plan on having more."

I'm pretty sure that was a cut on our parenting. I also feel that when our parents talk about raising us, they only remember us being school aged and self entertained. She's an ass. We cook all our meals about 5-6 days a week, but we're lazy parents for not wanting to pull apart a chicken?!?! Bitch please!!!!

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PinkPuffyHeart2

I'm hiding upstairs so I can play on my phone. Ahhhh... So this is what it feels like to be a man...

phishgirl29

@zigspective she asked us first and we told her not to bother but she brought it anyway. She loves creating more work for us just so we do things her way.

WasNotWas

FunkyPhoenix

My child absolutely would not go down for his afternoon nap. Stage 4 clinging all afternoon. Now he is completely overly tired and screaming in his crib while I want to punch MH in the face for being useless and go scream into a pillow.

Just had to get that out. Carry on.

tiffletons518

WorkinIt said:

Poor DH is about to make his 4th trip outside to shovel with no sight of letting up.... Although it was him that said he didn't want to get a snow blower because he likes the exercise from shoveling.

Haha bet his kicking himself for that right about now. When my H was on his second time outside with the snowblower, we got about an inch just while he was out there. I heard some of us will get close to 16 inches. Gross.

Eta I hate autocorrect

tttwalters

The Bachelor is on, ahhh I love it too much really. Juan Pablo's daughter was not strapped in her carseat correctly though.

lioness13

Thoughts after catching up:

I wish I had known how important it was to marry someone who was domestic. My DH doesn't cook or clean unless it's a special occasion.

I will be watching 90 day fiancé or whatever it's called. I like shows about relationships and crap tv.

I think cold temps in ATL feel warmer than cold in NY. It was 20 degrees yesterday morning and I was fine without a real coat on. I love living in the south and will not complain about the cold.

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PinkPuffyHeart2

tttwalters said:

The Bachelor is on, ahhh I love it too much really. Juan Pablo's daughter was not strapped in her carseat correctly though.

Yes! I was wondering if anyone else caught that.

tiffletons518

@NikkiP15 I am part of some mom2mom facebook groups. I sold off a bunch of DS's 3-6 months that he's grown out of yesterday and made a little over $50. I stored everything from DD1 just in case we had a girl the next time. But, we had the space to do so. Everything I sell of his or DD2's, I set that money aside and then I have a stash for when they need new clothes.

tiffletons518

This is a satellite picture of Michigan. Good ol lake effect snow..


eta-not right now.

Nix55

I'm heading back to work tomorrow after 16 glorious days off. I will miss you, girls!! Don't have too much fun without me. Here's a pic of my cute daughter at the park. Sorrynotsorry, it has been 70 degrees this week.

PinkPuffyHeart2

subliminalrabbit said:

Well, since E keeps popping awake I'll be a bit of an AW while I test my bladder control with a dozing baby on me:

We hit some awesome milestones this weekend!

1. Finally ate and enjoyed solids (banana).

2. Napped in his crib for the first time.

3. Allowed me to wear him in the Ergo and even fell asleep! (He's rejected baby wearing since he was just a few weeks old.)

All these things make me so happy!

Yay!! Go E!!!

CindyRelluh

Eta ugh fuck my phone.

CindyRelluh

I'm watching Zack and Miri Make a Porno. WHERE HAS THIS MOVIE BEEN ALL MY LIFE?!

CindyRelluh

There are no spoilers @cl8badb don't worry! I cautiously looked through it.

HeartLikeMine3

@cl8badb me too can't wait for LO's morning nap so I can catch up on revenge and the bachelor.

HeartLikeMine3

Was the bachelor only a one hour episode last night?

WasNotWas

Us to rabbit, I go feed him, 15 minute later he cries, 2 hrs later more cries, then at 3 hrs since last feeding I feed him again.

We were making so much good progress...

WasNotWas

&subliminalrabbit said:

@wasnotwas, that sounds exactly like what's happening here...

That makes me feel a little better, I was attributing it to taking the pillow out from under his mattress...always blame the kid, I should know this by now

WasNotWas

I am hiding in bed while H entertains both kids before we all get ready for the day. One of these days I'm gonna go to the gym or something after his 5 am wake up/feeding. BAHAHAHA

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