@homecook422 if it was just the once I'd try not to stress. You have so much extra blood running through your body and your pelvis area in particular that sometimes a little just kind of comes through the membranes. It happens a lot after sex or a pelvic exam, but can happen randomly too
@littlemarshmallow I've had two missed miscarriages and it's tough. I do keep in mind that "today I'm pregnant". And the fact that you saw your little one at 8.5 weeks is very reassuring. Most miscarriages happen in the first 8 weeks and your chances of having one go down steadily from there. Numbers/percentages really help me to chill a bit
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
@ravenhairedgirl83 Coffee is a complete no-go for me right now. It's one of my worst nausea triggers, which is a bummer. I'm generally a big coffee drinker. I've been drinking ginger green tea in the mornings instead for the last few weeks.
@ashnicell same here, I haven’t been able to smell coffee in weeks. My husband brewed some the other day and I woke up dry heaving 😭 hoping it eases up because I love coffee.
I can have like one coffee a day right now without triggering my heartburn TOO much. Which sucks for someone who is used to 2-3 cups a day. Currently making myself a cup of earl grey so I can attempt to get some work done XP
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
you input how far along you are and it tells you the odds of NOT miscarrying at that point (for 12w0d you have a 98.3% chance of NOT misscarrying!). Watching the odds improve bit by bit every day helped when I was super anxious a few weeks ago.
Also, something that helped me was reading that once you see a strong heartbeat at 8 weeks or later, the chance of a miscarriage goes waaaaaay down.
@mflowers929 - I feel your pain! Coffee is the only food item that triggers any queasiness. Besides that, I have had no nausea to date. I started drinking Bigelow herbal mint tea with honey, which definitely helps as a hot, sipping drink. I may try coffee again later in TM 2 or 3, but herbal tea it is for now. (I'm 10w3d)
littlemarshmallow I had the same worries! I had a scan that showed 6W2D last month and haven’t heard anything since my US this morning. The last two days I’ve been such a wreck! Disappearing symptoms, less nausea, less breast tenderness, feeling more human but it made me so scared there was something wrong.
This AM I was measuring ahead at 11W2D and a strong BPM of 174. So— I know exactly how you feel! The odds reassure website did help.
My first baby (2005) was a very quick delivery. From the moment of the first contraction to the third push it was less than 4 hours and he was 6 weeks early. This baby I am going to have to have a c-section because of a past brain surgery has left me not able to strain/push… so any suggestions on a first time c-section. What to expect before,during, and after?
With my first I was able to start breastfeeding right away so can I do that after a c-section?
@brandi-h this will be my 3rd C A scheduled C is way different from an emergency C. You'll go in early and get changed. They'll monitor you and baby for a little bit, shave your pubic area, set you up with an IV. You also have to drink a nasty drink which is apparently to neutralize stomach acid just in case. Then they'll bring you to the surgery room and the anesthetist will give you a shot to numb you and then put the spinal block in (this is apparently very similar to getting an epidural). For me it bombed my BP and I wound up vomiting, which is a normal-ish reaction to it. Anyways, they'll settle you on the table and put up a drape over your chest, at which point your partner can come in if they're not already there. The doctor will come and, if they're nice, put in a catheter now (you can request it, otherwise some put one in before you're numbed - ouch). Then they start cutting and baby is usually out in 5-10 minutes. As long as everything is okay, your partner can go and "cut the cord" (shorter) and they'll wrap baby up and bring them over to you while the doctor sews you up. Once that's done they'll move you to the recovery room and likely do measurements there. You do have to lay flat-ish for about 2 hours post surgery, but I got them to prop me up a little so I could latch my daughter then. It was about 45 minutes post birth, which isn't immediately but is still within that 1 hour window that they say is critical Also, if you're itching let them know. Some people (like me) wind up having an allergic reaction to the anesthesia and they can give you IV benadryl in that case.
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
Has anyone else not told family 😬? I am 12 weeks and and it is pretty obvious on my frame;. After the scare last week I am even more apprehensive. Mind you I am the same person that told the whole world at around 5 weeks for my last two pregnancies, but losing ds's twin and experiencing how people reacted was really hard for me to deal with.
Is it crazy of me to want another 1st trimester mw appointment? I feel like ours was cut short after they couldn't find the hb. Basically it went from let's see if we can find the hb to let's prepare you for a mmc. I am going to have a blood draw next week, but I want another try at the doppler and to have all of my questions answered that we didn't get to.
@ponyoisfun I'm probably going to tell my parents today. I was planning on waiting until they got up here but they're pricing out our cruise rooms so we kind of have to tell them that there will be 5 of us by then 🙈
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
@ponyoisfun I think you should wait until you are comfortable telling people! If another appointment will make you comfortable I think that is totally reasonable. Wait until tri 3 if you want
@brandi-h I’ve had two. I think mflowers covered it pretty well! Skin to skin is best practice to help initiate breastfeeding and most hospitals will do their best to make that happens asap. Ask your ob what their process is and make your wishes known. Another thing is discuss sutures vs staples, I had sutures the first time and staples the second which was just that OBs preference (quicker closer). Sutures are typically preferred and for me I hated the staples lol they were so itchy.
Depending on hospital protocol, you may have pitocin running post op to make sure you are contracting and not allowing your uterus to become boggy and hemorrhage. I didn’t feel any pain but could feel super minor cramping sensations with this.
You should also have an abdominal binder, this was a lifesaver for me. I wore it for 2 weeks lol. It’s best to get up and moving as soon as you have sensation as long as it isn’t contraindicated. I like my binder nice and snug when I get up the first time.
After your catheter comes out, you have 6 hours to pee. If it doesn’t happen that is ok. You will need to be straight catheterized to empty your bladder. This isn’t a big deal at all, sometimes the nerve the helps us pee needs a little more time to wake up after spinal anesthesia. No big deal and super common!
Stay on top of the pain meds at least for the first couple of days. Just take them on a schedule and stay ahead of the pain unless you feel you do ok without them. I did fine with just Motrin my second time but needed more with my first.
Yes, I forgot about getting up! The sooner you can get up the better. Because of my allergic reaction and needing benadryl I dozed for the first few hours after getting into my room, but as soon as I was awake and could feel my toes I got them to help me out of bed to sit up in the chair (about 8 hours for my 1st, 6 for my 2nd). It really helps to get the blood flowing and your muscles moving. I know a lot of women wind up laid up for a bit after a c section but I really think that getting up ASAP helped me to feel better faster, and possibly heal better too. They cut through the same incision both times, and both times it's healed up so well that the only numbness is right ON the incision itself.
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
Yes, moving helps healing and also decreases the probability of blood clots or pneumonia! Both super serious complications. Also, ask for an incentive spirometer if you aren’t given one and use it 10 times per hour broken into 3-4 repetitions at a time. It mimics natural sighing and opens your lungs to help prevent pneumonia. With abdominal surgery pain plus a binder, we don’t breathe as deep as we normally do. It helps so much.
@mflowers929 I forgot about the itching 😩 my first was general anesthesia but my second I had a spinal block and the anesthetic itch is no joke! I was taking Atarax for puppps and it helped quite a bit and didn’t make me as drowsy as Benadryl does. Maybe ask for that this time around?
@mflowers929 I've had a C-section and I feel like I just learned so much from you. Lol. Mine was an emergency c-section though so it was a different process. This time I told my OB I'd like to try for a VBAC. She agreed we could try, but that her recommendation would be not to induce and still try for VBAC. So we'll be setting a date for a scheduled C-section near my due date. I'm due the 5th, so probably the 4th or 7th. If I go into labor naturally before then, we'll give it a go. If we reach the scheduled date with no natural labor, we'll proceed with cesarean.
@Gingermom15 I'll have to keep that in mind for next time. Although tbh I didn't mind too much because nerves kept me up most of the night before both times lol. My first I didn't even realize I was itching so bad until someone mentioned that my nose was looking raw. I was just so used to being itchy from the cholestasis that it didn't register til then lol
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
@ponyoisfun the only people who know are my coworkers and my best friend. We don’t plan on telling family until we find out the sex. Tell people when and how you want, this is your pregnancy and your news to share when you are ready.
ETA fixed autocorrect since you’re pregnant and not pregaming 🙃
@ponyoisfun We told family at Easter and our closest friends know. They all pretty much guessed fairly early on. I don't think there's anything wrong with keeping it secret for as long as you want.
@ponyoisfun First of all, immensely big and loving hugs for you! This is a hard, scary, and honestly traumatic time that can bring up a lot of emotions as you navigate through.
That being said—give and do for yourself what you need. If you need an outlet of friends or family to talk to, then choose one or two deliberate people to tell. But if you’re not wanting to tell, I don’t care if you’re 7 months pregnant, full rounded belly, refusing all alcohol and waddling like a duck—you don’t have to tell anyone a single thing you’re not ready for. You don’t owe anyone anything. This is your life, your story, your baby, your loss, your rainbow—it’s not about anyone else, their feelings, their wondering, their concerns right now. Take care of you. As mamas, we spend way too much time being concerned about what other people need and want and expect from us. Allow yourself that own mental reprieve to take the pressure off your shoulders and do whatever you need to be most comfortable.
On that same note, if you need/want another MW or doctors appointment—advocate for yourself! Go get it! We forget sometimes that we are the ‘consumer’ in healthcare and though they can say what is traditional, normal, or expected, if you’re not being heard and treated in the way you want to be treated, find someone else who will hear and care for you. With my first OB I sugar-coated everything. During my 2nd living child’s pregnancy I had been through 4 losses and was so over the BS. Stating it out exactly how it was and how I felt to my OB made a WORLD of difference in my care. Even with this one, in the beginning I simply stated I wanted more HCG betas and I knew it was overkill but it was what would help my immense anxiety and, say no more, she scheduled more. All this to say, advocate for yourself and ask for what you want. If they won’t listen to you now, find someone new, but chances are, if you say “hey, I had a loss with my last twins, I’m so nervous and anxious now after not finding the HB on the Doppler, I’d really like to come in again to look for HB or have an ultrasound for peace of mind” in 95% of cases, I’m sure they’ll say yes. If they’re the other 5%, find a new provider!
Sorry for the novel, I’ve just become so big on women’s advocacy after so many horror stories. Sometimes we all forget we and other people are humans, and not just jobs or routine work. As a teacher, I had many times my students would stop me in my tracks and I was overwhelmed coming back to the reality that they were each individuals and not just a data point for all of our districts stupid metrics that they would bark down our throats. The medical profession gets stressed with the same thing—see XYZ number of patients in ABC amount of time, continuous improvement, charge PQR expenses, get insurance company coverage to pay, blah blah blah. You’ve got this! Don’t succumb to the BS. Happy to pep talk you up any time you need to!
@homecook422 I had some brown tinged CM last weekend. It freaked me out at first because I thought it was the start of the end but it stopped shortly after and I haven't had anything since. I was able to find the babies heartbeat on the doppler so it reassured me that everything was fine. So I'm sure in your case that everything is fine but if you're feeling stressed reach out to your Healthcare provider and tell them you'd like to come in for reassurance!!
@littlemarshmallow I remind myself that there's nothing that I can do to change my outcome if I miscarry. I'm one of the unfortunate ones who have suffered a MMC. It was horrible. But there's no way to prevent something like that from happening so I don't let myself worry about it. I also borrowed a doppler from a friend and try to find the HB early and whenever I start to feel anxious. It helps me immensely.
@ponyoisfun I agree with @sunshine2417! Reach out to your provider and tell them how you're feeling and that you'd like to be seen for reassurance. My OB has always accommodated me when I've been feeling anxious. She's done beta draws at the beginning of pregnancies when I requested them after my MC's. She's gotten me in for scans when I've been anxious. It's what your doctor is there for
@ponyoisfun - One of the hardest parts of pregnancy for me so far has been keeping this huge and life-changing news to ourselves. We are both 38 and this is our first child and my parents first grandchild. Our parents most likely thought it wasn't in the plans for us. Honestly, we kind of thought the same (by choice). For us, the 'right' time to tell everyone is after 12 weeks and a healthy ultrasound appt. I respect that this timeline is different for everyone. Two weeks from this weekend, we tell our families. I can't wait for that.
I feel so dumb asking this at 11 weeks but it’s midnight and it only just occurred to me
I get more and more nauseous as the day progresses. And then it keeps me up at night. Would B6/Unisom help that? Can I get those OTC? Is it one supplement or two separate ones? Any brands better than others?
@PurplePumpernickel They definitely could help. You can get them OTC. For the Unisom, you'll want the one where the active ingredient is Doxylamine Succinate. For B6, my OB recommended 25mg. My local pharmacy only has 100mg out on the shelf, but they had 50 mg behind the pharmacy counter. I just had to ask for them and I break them in half. I also find it helps to have a high protein snack close to going to sleep. Lately it's been a hard-boiled egg about 30 minutes before bed.
@PurplePumpernickel it’s worth a try! You might be able to stomach higher protein food and more filling snacks throughout the day, which could help nausea at night since empty stomach worsens nausea. The cruel circle of morning sickness 👎 I’ve heard B6 alone also sometimes helps nausea. So one at night with Unisom, in the morning and the afternoon.
@ashnicell & @Gingermom15 thank you! I’ve done a decent job of eating a good dinner, often protein focused since my husband (the chef) is low carb. Definitely going to try the combo as soon as I can get to a drug store.
Has anyone else not told family 😬? I am 12 weeks and and it is pretty obvious on my frame;. After the scare last week I am even more apprehensive. Mind you I am the same person that told the whole world at around 5 weeks for my last two pregnancies, but losing ds's twin and experiencing how people reacted was really hard for me to deal with.
Is it crazy of me to want another 1st trimester mw appointment? I feel like ours was cut short after they couldn't find the hb. Basically it went from let's see if we can find the hb to let's prepare you for a mmc. I am going to have a blood draw next week, but I want another try at the doppler and to have all of my questions answered that we didn't get to.
I feel the exact same way. Besides my partner and my best cousin, I haven't told a soul. I had a miscarriage in November and really afraid of what may happen when I do decide to tell anyone. In my case, I'm not showing at all. I had a tummy tuck a few years ago and my abdomen is helping in that department. For right now, I just can't say a word.
I feel so dumb asking this at 11 weeks but it’s midnight and it only just occurred to me
I get more and more nauseous as the day progresses. And then it keeps me up at night. Would B6/Unisom help that? Can I get those OTC? Is it one supplement or two separate ones? Any brands better than others?
I just want to sleep and not feel terrible Grrrrr
This is really close to how my nausea has been! My doctor ended up prescribing me the prescription version of B6/Unisom because it is slower release. I still take it at night, but it doesn't make me super sleepy like a Unisom does--just a little extra sleepy if that makes sense. It has helped a lot with this. I try to squeeze all of my meals and snacks into the time I can eat and then settle in for the night with plenty of water.
Does anyone else here have hyperemisis gravidarum? I’m a STM. Did not have this with my first (although the sickness was TERRIBLE with him too) and am at my wits end. No one I know has ever had this. I feel like people are judging me because I literally cannot even function at all. I went two weeks without washing my hair or shaving my armpits (yikes)!!!!! Nevermind the fact I haven’t cooked except in the microwave for over a month and a half. That’s so abnormal for me. I’m a super super health nut. Make EVERYTHING homemade for my family - including bread, pasta and tortillas! I’ve just given up on life at this point essentially…that’s what it feels like.
p.s. Please don’t come at me about my username. It literally says it’s been updated for about a month now, but anytime I post in comments it still says knottie. This is the least of my concerns, but I’m sorry if it annoys you.
@knottieb78d750e3dd941db I don't have it this time, but I had "borderline" HG last pregnancy (only because apparently I didn't lose enough weight to be considered it). Not much vomiting but persistent extreme nausea no matter what I did. I feel ya, I wound up laying on the couch most of the time I was awake, called out to work so much that I wound up just getting put out on leave. It was somewhere around week 14 that I finally got someone to take me seriously and I was prescribed metonia and that, for me, was the magic key that helped knock down the nausea so at least I could be somewhat functional. I hope you're able to find your magic key too, because it really is horrible =(
Momma to 3 angels and two amazing children
F born June 2018 W born September 2020 #3 due November 2022
@knottieb78d750e3dd941db talk to your OB and see if there is something else they can give you to help get you functioning again. Try not to feel guilty you are in survival mode at this point
@knottieb78d750e3dd941db I had a couple of friends with HG. It is debilitating. One of my friends had a feeding tube through her nose just to get nutrients. I hope you can find some relief with it. Don't let anyone feel like you're not doing enough!
Thanks you guys. Yes they said they refuse to work with me unless I at least give zofran a try. I did and turns out I’m allergic to it 🙃🙃🙃 funnnnn!!! I’m grateful for that though because I really didn’t feel comfortable with it in the first place. Now I’m hoping they’ll just let me come in every week for IV fluids. I have my first official appointment tomorrow at about 13 weeks (doesn’t that seem really late?!?!?) so I’m for sure going to advocate more aggressively. I just feel like a pathetic loser. I am definitely not living up to the Proverbs 31 woman right now, which devastates me.
Having one on Tuesday and it's my first time for it but what's the NIPT like and how long does it take before I get the results back? My older two are 20 and 11, so I didn't have to think about a lot of the procedures then that I have to at this point. I know that I am going to have to repeatedly tell them that I do NOT want to see the gender in that report!
The NIPT is just a blood draw, nothing scary. If they order an NT to go with it, that's just an ultrasound.
Current pregnancy - First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.
Four prior losses, no living children - 1 first trimester miscarriage, 1 blighted ovum, 1 chemical, and one extreme premature live birth daughter who died at 15 days old.
Re: The Great Big Question Thread
@littlemarshmallow I've had two missed miscarriages and it's tough. I do keep in mind that "today I'm pregnant". And the fact that you saw your little one at 8.5 weeks is very reassuring. Most miscarriages happen in the first 8 weeks and your chances of having one go down steadily from there. Numbers/percentages really help me to chill a bit
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
I had the same worries! I had a scan that showed 6W2D last month and haven’t heard anything since my US this morning. The last two days I’ve been such a wreck! Disappearing symptoms, less nausea, less breast tenderness, feeling more human but it made me so scared there was something wrong.
so any suggestions on a first time c-section. What to expect before,during, and after?
Anyways, they'll settle you on the table and put up a drape over your chest, at which point your partner can come in if they're not already there. The doctor will come and, if they're nice, put in a catheter now (you can request it, otherwise some put one in before you're numbed - ouch). Then they start cutting and baby is usually out in 5-10 minutes. As long as everything is okay, your partner can go and "cut the cord" (shorter) and they'll wrap baby up and bring them over to you while the doctor sews you up.
Once that's done they'll move you to the recovery room and likely do measurements there. You do have to lay flat-ish for about 2 hours post surgery, but I got them to prop me up a little so I could latch my daughter then. It was about 45 minutes post birth, which isn't immediately but is still within that 1 hour window that they say is critical
Also, if you're itching let them know. Some people (like me) wind up having an allergic reaction to the anesthesia and they can give you IV benadryl in that case.
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
Is it crazy of me to want another 1st trimester mw appointment? I feel like ours was cut short after they couldn't find the hb. Basically it went from let's see if we can find the hb to let's prepare you for a mmc. I am going to have a blood draw next week, but I want another try at the doppler and to have all of my questions answered that we didn't get to.
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
My first I didn't even realize I was itching so bad until someone mentioned that my nose was looking raw. I was just so used to being itchy from the cholestasis that it didn't register til then lol
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
On that same note, if you need/want another MW or doctors appointment—advocate for yourself! Go get it! We forget sometimes that we are the ‘consumer’ in healthcare and though they can say what is traditional, normal, or expected, if you’re not being heard and treated in the way you want to be treated, find someone else who will hear and care for you. With my first OB I sugar-coated everything. During my 2nd living child’s pregnancy I had been through 4 losses and was so over the BS. Stating it out exactly how it was and how I felt to my OB made a WORLD of difference in my care. Even with this one, in the beginning I simply stated I wanted more HCG betas and I knew it was overkill but it was what would help my immense anxiety and, say no more, she scheduled more. All this to say, advocate for yourself and ask for what you want. If they won’t listen to you now, find someone new, but chances are, if you say “hey, I had a loss with my last twins, I’m so nervous and anxious now after not finding the HB on the Doppler, I’d really like to come in again to look for HB or have an ultrasound for peace of mind” in 95% of cases, I’m sure they’ll say yes. If they’re the other 5%, find a new provider!
@littlemarshmallow I remind myself that there's nothing that I can do to change my outcome if I miscarry. I'm one of the unfortunate ones who have suffered a MMC. It was horrible. But there's no way to prevent something like that from happening so I don't let myself worry about it. I also borrowed a doppler from a friend and try to find the HB early and whenever I start to feel anxious. It helps me immensely.
@ponyoisfun I agree with @sunshine2417! Reach out to your provider and tell them how you're feeling and that you'd like to be seen for reassurance. My OB has always accommodated me when I've been feeling anxious. She's done beta draws at the beginning of pregnancies when I requested them after my MC's. She's gotten me in for scans when I've been anxious. It's what your doctor is there for
I get more and more nauseous as the day progresses. And then it keeps me up at night. Would B6/Unisom help that? Can I get those OTC? Is it one supplement or two separate ones? Any brands better than others?
p.s. Please don’t come at me about my username. It literally says it’s been updated for about a month now, but anytime I post in comments it still says knottie. This is the least of my concerns, but I’m sorry if it annoys you.
I hope you're able to find your magic key too, because it really is horrible =(
W born September 2020
#3 due November 2022
I had a couple of friends with HG. It is debilitating. One of my friends had a feeding tube through her nose just to get nutrients. I hope you can find some relief with it. Don't let anyone feel like you're not doing enough!
First BFP on 1/4/22. Due date 9/13/22.