Oooh. Now I understand. Disregard my confused comment on the randoms thread. Also @mangoandguava I think it’s rude for second trimester to be in March for us. 👎🏻
@Katek819 I have. My husband swears by it and loves it so much. For me personally it really screwed with my (very sensitive) stomach. So, I won’t touch it again. It has, I think, brewers yeast in it and I had a stomach ache for 3-4 days when I drank 2-3 in 1 day. The package says you can have multiple servings in a day but I would start with just 1.
Ok so I'm at a loss here. I know growing humans is exhausting. Where I teach, it is so mentally and emotionally draining that I have to lie down after work every day. MH is laid off this week, so thankfully, he has been cooking and cleaning. He is out with a friend right now, and I cried at the thought of how exhausting it would be to fill the dishwasher. Is anyone else, or has anyone else, been so drained like this by their work while pregnant? What do I do? I can barely function. 😩 This feels terrible.
@bridgiebee82 you do what you can and don’t worry about the rest. You are growing not 1 but 2 babies and have a full time job that is exhausting prior to being pregnant. Cry it out, and get some rest. My best advice is to listen to your body. Also I’ve cried about everything under the Sun, I blame the hormones. FWIW i am a SAHM with only 1 child to take care of, so I can imagine how exhausting it is to have to teach a whole classroom of them. You are a saint. Also if it really gets to be too much talk to YH about taking an earlier leave
@bridgiebee82 okay first of all, you’re growing TWO humans. I’d say that’s a little more than exhausting. I obviously am not a working mom, but my hat’s off to all of you amazing ladies who are. I don’t have any good advice on how to regain energy. But something that helps me is remember this is a season. It’s not like this forever. Some days are hard and some days aren’t. It’s okay to have the hard days and do nothing. Be as productive as you can when those waves come, because it’s definitely a wave, atleast for me. And another thing that helps me is remembering that this season of pregnancy is preparation for parenthood. Pregnancy acclimated me to what was to come, even in subtle ways. I don’t know how to explain it.
Just know it’s okay. You don’t have to do it all. Lay on the couch. Cry thinking about the dishwasher. And let your husband carry the weight right now. I’m sorry it’s been so rough. It is worth it.
@bridgiebee82 I am so sorry. Honestly, until this week, I have had to lie down every single day after work as well. Just getting through the day was all I could do and I was basically horizontal once I was off the clock. I did not do anything in my house at all and it looks like it. There is literally nothing like first trimester exhaustion, and teaching is about as hard as it gets in terms of jobs because you are on all day. My husband is a teacher and has been for 14 years and has said that teaching over the past two years have been the most exhausting of his life. So I think that, plus the fact that because you have twins, you have double the exhaustion, explains it. I really hope that you will start to turn a corner soon. I’m rooting for you!
@bridgiebee82 I don’t have anything to add to what everyone else has said as far as reassurances/etc, but I do want you to know I also am ignoring a need to load the dishwasher in favor of laying down on my nice soft bed after a much less stressful day in a much less stressful environment, with half the humans growing inside of me as you have. Give yourself a high five when you do feel like putting a plate in the washer, and give yourself grace when you don’t. The dishes will still be there, and they won’t be any worse for being left another few hours. (Trust me - I had a bad bout with depression and no dishwasher a few years back, and I let stuff sit too long because it was Just Too Much. “Too long” is way longer than you think it would be.)
I second what @wigglyicecream said too - if it gets to be too too much, see if y’all can figure out a way for you to start your leave early.
Hey gals! FTM here with a probably dumb question about baby bumps… I am at 16 weeks and I feel like I look… bloated? But I wouldn’t call it a baby bump- it’s more or less the same general shape I was pre-pregnancy. Am I just going to wake up one day like “oh, there it is!” Or is it happening so slowly it’s hard to notice?
Hey! I’m pregnant with my first too! I’m 12.5 weeks and not showing yet either. I think there will be a point that we “pop” out enough that it’ll feel quite different within a fairly short amount of time. I’m wondering what it’ll be like to have a non-food bump. Not saying bloat will be all gone, but baby will be much more present. Right now the baby is low-more below the waist, as I understand. As it grows a bit more, it’ll move up and out. Everyone has a slightly different experience though! Rice gave me a nice bump tonight that’ll be gone by morning!🤣
Also if you change your username to something easier than the default, we can tag you easily! If you stop by the introduction thread, we’d love to get to know you as well!💕
Hey knottie. If you look through the HDBD thread, you’ll see photos of ladies’ bumps here. It’s fun because everyone shows differently. I would say looking bloated as a first time mom is normal but the stomach is probably feeling more firm at this point. A lot of the initial growth comes just from your uterus expanding.
Has anyone changed jobs while pregnant? Or hired someone who changed jobs while pregnant? I’m progressing through interview stages in another job and while it’s certainly far from certain it’s starting to feel more real. Am I crazy to even be thinking about another job? When do you tell the prospective job? I feel like no man would ever even worry about this…
My bump is always high and so it looks like I just have a bloated stomach. I don't get the cute low bump and curve, just a big bowl belly from under the boobs down to my hips. Oh well. This is my third and I've learned to accept the fact that I don't look cute pregnant.
@buffythevampireslayer I started my nursing job when I was pregnant with DD. I think the most important thing would be to consider if you switch jobs you might not qualify for FMLA so your time off for maternity leave might only be guaranteed for 6 weeks. I'd just look into that
@buffythevampireslayer I would ask about benefits to find out more about their plans. When I moved jobs last July, before accepting it, I made sure about their maternity leave plan. In my case, if baby comes before I qualify for FMLA, I'm still eligible for their short term disability plan and their extra maternity plan on top of it & was from day 1. It is best to know what you qualify for upfront so there aren't any surprises.
Has anyone thought about sleepers yet? With my son the rock and play was life. He slept in it when he was in our room or napping through the day before he was introduced to the crib. Now that the rock and play is a death trap I'm looking at other bassinet type things. Wondering what others are thinking.
@Katek819 I really liked the Halo bassinet last time around
Me: 35 H: 35 Married: 4/5/13 "You know that place between sleep and awake, that place where you can still remember dreaming? That's where I will always love you. That's where I'll be waiting." ~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #1: 11/12/12 EDD 7/25/13 Baby boy: 7/27/13 BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18 BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18 RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28 BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19 Rainbow baby girl born 7/23/19 BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
I have a pack and play with a bassinet and usually if I can lay baby down, I put them in the crib in our room because my children are loud and obnoxious 🤣
I like something lightweight that I can carry with me from room to room. Mostly a safe place to put baby down with other kids running around. I don’t like bulky baby gear. It just doesn’t work for us.
If they’re not being held or in a baby carrier, they’re in this type of thing. Or a pack n play. But when they’re so little, it’s this or me holding them.
@and_peggy I love that one from what I've seen. They even make a cute fawn one that I've been eyeballing, a bouncer and a swing. For those of you with dogs, specifically young/energetic dogs, how were your dogs when you have your babies in these swings/bouncers? We have a lot of work to do with Cora before August. She is easily trainable and seems to learn commands quickly, she is just at a phase where she chooses when she wants to listen and seems to want to steal everything that's not hers (mostly shoes, socks, and the remote).
Yeah, I feel like I lucked out with not having an accident happen in the r&p and also won’t be using mine this go around. I still have to get rid of them before baby comes. I have a p&p with the bassinet attachment that I’ll use more this time. I also really, really want a Moses basket for baby to nap in. It will double as a safe sleep space for in our camper as well. With ds2 I definitely used a laundry basket in our camper 🤣
@paytonpedro I feel you on the RNP. It was a godsend for us then after the recall all I was so happy that nothing happened to my DD. i was lurking in a different bmb and the RNP came up. There are studies and articles that address that it isn’t even safe for supervised sleep. I’m not here to preach and to each their own but it’s a very hard no for me. It was a very long and scary road to finally getting DD to sleep in a safe place. From RNP, to bedsharing and everything in between. I will only have this baby in safe sleeping situations.
@wigglyicecream Please link to the studies about it being unsafe for supervised sleep. I did a lot of research on it when it was first recalled to see if I wanted to get rid of mine or hang onto it (it was a year past the period of reimbursement) and everything I read kept referring to overnight sleep, which we never used it for for either kid before the recall anyway.
@wisewitch222 I have to go back lurking and figure out which bmb it was. I definitely will link them once I come across the thread again. I always thought it was from improper use, people not buckling in the babies, or having older babies in it.
@wigglyicecream I went back and read some more recent articles earlier this afternoon and there is a legitimate risk for proper use, which is that the incline can lead to baby's head slumping forward. Strollers and bouncer seats like the one posted above have the same risk, but they're not marketed as sleep surfaces. But if you're in the room with newborn napping in any of these things you can see if their head slumps and move them. But I'm interested in reading more articles.
Also FWIW Fisher Price just recalled 2 more items for infant deaths in June 2021. Not a brand I think I’m going to trust with anything to do with safety.
Per the NPR link. “ On Friday, Fisher-Price recalled two additional products — the 2-in-1 Soothe 'n Play Glider and the 4-in-1 Rock 'n Glide Soother — after at least four infants were reported to have died while using the soother.”
As far as night sleep is concerned, swaddles make that hard flat surface eminently sleepable for newborns. I used to hear a lot of parents of kids my kids' age say their kids babies couldn't sleep in the crib because they didn't like to be swaddled. Nobody likes to be put into a swaddle, and yes, they try to bust out, but once inside, they sleep for full stretches and don't startle awake. Now excuse me while I go on a research rampage to see if any of those have been recalled since 2018...
(ETA - removed some personal reflections that could be misinterpreted)
@wisewitch222 You have to do whatever is best for your family. If you feel comfortable supervising your baby in a RNP then by all means. I think the fact it was never tested for safety is a huge red flag and I also will agree to disagree about supervising unsafe sleep. I don’t believe that you can take an unsafe sleep situation and make it safe by watching. I also don’t think it’s reasonable to assume you will have your eyes glued to your baby with no distractions for the entire time they will be in the RNP napping. As I stated above two other FP products have been recalled just last year for more infant deaths. I believe it’s just too many babies dying in their products. The larger issue I have is that we as an average consumer assume that these products are tested and are safe for our babies.
I’m with you @wigglyicecream. I do not let my kids stay asleep in the car seat. I clearly can’t control them falling asleep in the car, but I don’t let my infants nap in the car seat in the house, or the swing, or the bouncer, or the stroller. Most of the time my kids aren’t even in the stroller until they are six months. This is not to say that I’m better than anyone else or perfect at all, but the hazards of asphyxiation scare me and it happens sometimes without you noticing. What’s the point of putting them down in something if I can’t even fold laundry because I need to watch them breathe? I also am the weird person who does only let her kid use the exersaucer for 10-15 minutes a day, on the rare times that we use it. I don’t have a lot of different contraptions to put the baby in because ultimately when you research it, most of those things are bad for development. I was reading the Washington Post article you posted because when I saw it on Google it was behind a paywall and it shocked me that they didn’t actually check it for safety in any way. As a mom who had a child who was literally up screaming and crying every 20 minutes by 9-10 months for “reflux” that actually turned out to be a milk protein problem, I understand being desperate for my kid to sleep… but I can tell you that even then I didn’t use the rock and play my SIL swore by… perhaps it’s an association problem for me too, because the RNP has never sat right with me even with my first in 2015, but then again my SIL doesn’t think that a car seat has to be replaced when it’s expired so, it’s not like I think she has the best judgement. 😬 Anyway, others can do what they think meets their criteria for safety but I appreciated you sharing the information.
I think the biggest thing, even with supervised sleep in them, is you would have to solely, exclusively stare at baby to make sure their chest is still rising and falling. And know that even with that close of supervision and proper use it can happen so quickly and unexpectedly.
I think it’s worth mentioning, on the topic of safe sleep, only products labeled BASSINET, CRIB, or PACK N PLAY are actually safe for sleep. There are many, many unsafe sleep products marketed for babies (nappers, sleepers etc) that are sold in big box stores everyday. Baby should sleep alone (no other humans/ blankets/ toys), on their back, in a crib/bassinet/pack n play.
That being said, I made mistakes with my boys. I’ll be the first one to admit that. No one is perfect. I used the r&p with both babies to sleep in because they loved it and actually slept. But it’s purely survivors bias to be able to sit here and say that we didn’t have an issue with it. I absolutely will not use mine, it’s a hard no. But my motto is know better, do better. 🙂 Ultimately, you have to do what’s best for your family, and know the risks and be willing to take them.
@paytonpedro that’s what I was thinking too. I already check 400 times a minute to see if they’re breathing; I’m sure there’s tons of SIDS cases where the parent was in the room with the baby when they stopped breathing. So just being close isn’t a full proof method. Heck, the times my kids seriously injure them self is always in the 30 seconds I leave the room.
@wigglyicecream Thanks. I wasn't asking for advice, though, and the only advice I gave was about crib sleep with the swaddle. Per the the other conversation about bassinets, I'm pretty sure I'm the only person here whose kids slept nights exclusively in their crib from day one, so. I guess I'll go edit my earlier posts so nobody gets the wrong idea and does something unsafe.
Re: The Great Big Giant Question Thread!
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
Maybe try diluting it more than what you are supposed to, so that you can see how it makes you feel?
Just know it’s okay. You don’t have to do it all. Lay on the couch. Cry thinking about the dishwasher. And let your husband carry the weight right now. I’m sorry it’s been so rough. It is worth it.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
Also if you change your username to something easier than the default, we can tag you easily! If you stop by the introduction thread, we’d love to get to know you as well!💕
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
My bump is always high and so it looks like I just have a bloated stomach. I don't get the cute low bump and curve, just a big bowl belly from under the boobs down to my hips. Oh well. This is my third and I've learned to accept the fact that I don't look cute pregnant.
Married: 4/5/13
"You know that place between sleep and awake,
that place where you can still remember dreaming?
That's where I will always love you.
That's where I'll be waiting."
~Peter Pan
*TW*
BFP #2: 10/29/17 MMC dx @ 9 weeks
BFP #3: 2/2/18 MC 2/7/18
BFP #4: 3/2/18 MC 3/9/18
RPL testing and hysteroscopy: all normal
BFP #5: 4/1/18 MMC dx @ 14 weeks ----> genetically normal girl
Hysteroscopy to remove scar tissue 9/28
BFP #6 11/5/18 EDD 7/20/19
BFP #7 12/8/2021 EDD 8/22/2022
If they’re not being held or in a baby carrier, they’re in this type of thing. Or a pack n play. But when they’re so little, it’s this or me holding them.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19
For those of you with dogs, specifically young/energetic dogs, how were your dogs when you have your babies in these swings/bouncers? We have a lot of work to do with Cora before August. She is easily trainable and seems to learn commands quickly, she is just at a phase where she chooses when she wants to listen and seems to want to steal everything that's not hers (mostly shoes, socks, and the remote).
https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/economy/how-fisher-price-invented-a-popular-baby-sleeper-without-safety-tests-and-kept-it-on-the-market-even-as-babies-died/2019/05/30/78c2707a-7731-11e9-b3f5-5673edf2d127_story.html
https://www.npr.org/2021/06/07/1003985551/fisher-price-ignored-safety-warnings-even-after-infants-started-dying-report-fin
If you want to read the conversation I was talking about it’s in July 2022 located in TGBQT. Last page
(ETA - removed some personal reflections that could be misinterpreted)
Ultimately, you have to do what’s best for your family, and know the risks and be willing to take them.
5.5.16 | 8.14.17 | 1.30.19