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April 2021 Moms
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Random Vents

theletlerstheletlers member
in April 2021 Moms
I’m currently hiding out in my room to avoid the smell of the peanut butter my husband decided to eat in front of me. On the flip side, I also left both kids who are intentionally pissing each other off right now alone for him to deal with since I can’t stand the smell. 
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Re: Random Vents

  • bluey101321bluey101321 member
    @theletlers I wish I had seen this thread sooner! Sounds totally fair to me🤣 I did the same to my husband like last week when he decided to cook with Worcestershire sauce while making sausage and eggs without asking if I wanted it! Totally smelt like burnt soy sauce and I tossed my cookies to the point of losing any appetite. I was one mad mama. Lol. He knows now.. 
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    I didn’t see the thread started yet and remembered in other bump groups how I liked having a place to vent. Just had technical difficulties getting it started! 
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  • cagncoo12cagncoo12 member
    This is probably a stupid thing to vent about, but i live in Michigan, and am way to cheap to pay for the NFL package, so i can't watch the Packer's game today. It makes me sad. Also, i miss alcohol. 
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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    Haha I really thought I was going to miss alcohol, but I don't (yet). Going to my friends' wedding tomorrow though and I feel like it's going to be my first experience wishing I could have a drink (or 4). 
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  • jenn622-2jenn622-2 member
    I might miss alcohol if I wasn’t so nauseated this week 🤮 My rant is that I feel like crap and my FIL wanted to come visit. I told DH to tell him no and DH gave me a hard time about it and told him “maybe.” My in-laws were here on Monday and babysat DS on Tuesday and Thursday so we’ve already seen them 3x this week!! I don’t feel like visitors and pretending I feel fine when I dont. They don’t know I’m pregnant and I’m not ready to tell them. In these COVID times you can’t just tell people you don’t feel well without giving it some kind of justification either so I’d rather just avoid seeing them 😤
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  • pelorunningmamapelorunningmama member
    @jenn622-2 I’m the same. I think I’ll miss it during the second tri when I don’t feel like constant crap. Right now the thought of it makes me want to vomit.
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    Yeah I don’t think my stomach can handle alcohol right now!
    *TMI warning* But I’m seriously over the poop issue ladies. Like my s**t better get it’s actually together because I’m not gonna be a happy camper dealing with 31 more weeks of not going for days and then having it explode or be worthless rabbit pellets that I have to work way to hard to get out. 
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    @cagncoo12 vent away. That’s what this thread is for. All the daily/stupid/just need to vent it out stuff that gets ya. No judgment!
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  • pnh002pnh002 member
    My issue is my jaw! I have bruxism (teeth grinding) and TMJ issues and now that I'm pregnant, it's worse. And now that I have to eat all day long or get sick, my jaw is SO TIRED of chewing. I've been eating only soft stuff like pasta and soup. Anything else makes me sick and doesn't make me feel full. But there's only so much many different kinds of soup I can take!
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  • lbonistalbonista member
    I totally feel you about the in laws.  I like my husbands family a lot but sometimes they can just be over involved.  I really don't feel like telling them until I am between 12 to 14 weeks.  I would hate pretending I am feeling fine and having to fake it! 

    I have no food aversions or nausea, my body is so confused as to why I am not out binge drinking on the weekends like I normally would!  The bloat is just about the only symptom I have so far, I am really nervous about head aches and throwing up later on because that occurred in some of my friends.  
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  • cagncoo12cagncoo12 member
    @theletlers yes to your poop rant! I am SO over it! 
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  • goldpolkadotgoldpolkadot member
    @theletlers @cagncoo12 so so over it!!
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  • bblair24bblair24 member
    I had a tooth chip last week and I went to the dentist this morning - turns out at 31 years old I’m going to need my first ever filling 😭 I’ve never required any dental work outside of normal cleanings and my wisdom teeth extraction in college. The hygienist noted that and said pregnancy can really do a number on your teeth. So I have to request a dental clearance form when I’m at the OB on Wednesday, then call the dentist to schedule the filling. It’s ridiculous how scared I am about it, and I’m also just mad that I need it done haha! They mentioned a couple other teeth that look like they’re heading in the same direction. Lovely. Let’s add this to the list of “reasons why 2020 should be flushed down the toilet.” 
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    @bblair24 with my labor for DS2 I actually cracked one of my teeth in half and had to get a crown because there wasn’t enough left for a quicker fix! Babies definitely change everything in your body. Hopefully the other teeth don’t cause too many problems for you.
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  • bblair24bblair24 member
    @theletlers ahh ouch!! That sounds awful! I guess all my pregnancies decided to catch up with me now. Thanks, hopefully it can all be an easy fix! 
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  • mamabee1113mamabee1113 member
    @bblair24 bravo to getting this far without a cavity! Sorry you have to deal with it now, but I promise the worst part is the injection to numb your mouth. To help you feel better, I straight up LOST a tooth because of my pregnancy with DS. I have soft enamel to start with, so I got a cavity and didn't even notice until I had jaw pain that kept me up at night. I went and got it check and my tooth was so infected (is that the right word?) that it was all mush inside and cracked on the outside. I was probably only a few days away from my tooth completely breaking in half on me. I get my implant finished in two weeks and I am so excited to not me missing a tooth.
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  • bblair24bblair24 member
    @mamabee1113 oh gosh, that sounds so painful! Thanks for the comforting words about fillings, I honestly have this nightmare-ish image in my head of drills and pain and all that. So that’s good to know. Good luck getting your implant finished! I’m glad you almost have it behind you!!
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  • MandersXMandersX member
    That is impressive going that long without a cavity! I had great teeth until I had chemo in highschool. That really weakens your teeth. Add in some sort of extra nerve root which means I need about 5 shots to actually be numb and I am not a dentist fan. Friday I had a super sharp pain in one of my teeth all of a sudden. I talked to the dentist on the phone and we think it was just a lingering sinus issue from being sick recently. But, it scared me enough to go ahead and make my cleaning appointment I have been putting off due to Covid. 
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  • bblair24bblair24 member
    @MandersX, I’m sorry that you’ve gone through that! ❤️ I’ve definitely had sinus stuff make my teeth hurt before - crazy how everything’s connected. I’d also been putting off the dentist. Not anymore, today’s visit earned me another two! 😂 One for the filling, then one for a cleaning. 
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  • kvh22kvh22 member
    @bblair24 +1 to giving you props on making it this far with no cavities. I didn't have any until I was 25 I think? I discovered red wine and it became my alcohol of choice and that does a number on your teeth. I don't have the best enamel, either, but have great dental habits aside from the red wine. I think I've had 3 or 4 cavities now at 31. I also have receding gums which is genetic.

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  • bblair24bblair24 member
    @kvh22 thanks! ☺️ I feel like I might have receding gums too, but they didn’t mention it. One thing at a time I suppose! I take care of my teeth well too, although I don’t floss as often as I should I guess. I feel like I’ve slacked a little bit recently because of feeling so nauseous all the time. 
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  • mommeleonmommeleon member
    Omg I miss alcohol so much!! A couple of days ago I was venting to my husband about some drama that we have been dragged into by his family. I said I wished I could have a giant glass of cold beer when I got home from work. I get home, and what does DH have beside him, but a giant glass of cold beer 🤦‍♀️. I cried. I don't mind him drinking occasionally, but when I specifically say it's something that I really want and can't have??!! I don't think he will ever be doing that again. 
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  • eahayeseahayes member
    Not missing alcohol that much, probably because I don't feel that great, but I all of a sudden really miss the freedom of my thoughts and actions before I was pregnant.. does that make sense? I'm shoving food in when I feel sick because I know I shouldn't miss meals, or avoiding workouts because I know it'll wipe me out for the rest of the day. I keep reminding myself I loved being pregnant with my son, so once I'm over the first tri hump and get energy back it will get better!
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  • lbonistalbonista member
    I am the same way about eating.  I've never been a bad eater but I had days where I would basically eat nothing all day (pre-pregnancy).   Now, I feel compelled to make sure I am getting at least 1400 calories a day (normally I only have 1200).  On top of it, I am stressed so I end up having more cheat days than normal too.  Ugh, I feel like I'm going to look like a beached whale and not even be halfway!  

    I have been having some issues with falling asleep, less to do with pregnancy and more stress from school and work.  Has anyone taken benedryl while pregnant.  A nurse at my office said it was safe but I am still nervous.  I finally took two last night because my legs were super itchy (allergies) and I was not able fall asleep.  I got a great nights sleep but now I'm worried about it!  I have also heard that doxylamine succinate is safe for pregnancy.  Anyone have experiences with either sleep aids?
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    @lbonista yes they are both safe to take while pregnant. I’ve taken both myself either during this one or previous pregnancies. 

    I’m so weird about food too. I really dislike talking about food and looking at it while I eat. It’s almost just a forced chore anymore because I know I have to eat, but everything makes me feel so nauseous. Or I stress about it going to make me need to puke. It’s hard with little kids, but I can muster my way through it for them. But when another adult starts talking to me and asking about food while I eat it instantly affects my mindset. I hate it. 
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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    Omg hearing all these dental stories is totally freaking me out! I skipped my most recent 6 month cleaning because of COVID, but now I am thinking I absolutely need to go in for that. I am terrified of dental work (never had anything more serious than a cavity) and it gives me majorrrr anxiety. 

    I also feel what everyone else is saying about freedom/eating - before being pregnant, I would feel like okay, I can have this "bad" thing I'm craving like ice cream or pizza or whatever because I'll just work out tomorrow, but now I so rarely have the energy to work out. I also wasn't really a breakfast eater and would normally not really eat anything until much later in the day and only really ate one small meal in the afternoon and one large meal in the evening, but now I feel like I HAVE to eat as soon as I wake up to make sure I don't get nauseous and I have to continuously eat throughout the day even if I'm not really hungry to make sure I'm getting enough nutritional value.
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  • bbrahmbhattbbrahmbhatt member
    I'm on the freedom eating thing too; whenever I can eat I go for junk at least 2-3 times a week. I feel guilty about it, but at the same time sometimes it is all that sounds good.

    @theblondebump my last checkup got cancelled too! I know I need to go in, but I'm too scared to be in a space with other patients having their mouths worked on (I go to the dental office at the hospital where I work and all the hygienists work in a big open area with nice partitions, but it is still an open area).

    My main rant right now is co-workers who don't do their job. There are 2 new employees, they have been told things over and over again and it is like NOTHING sinks in. EVER. They have this mentality like "Oh someone will take care of that" and just leave their work undone. That combined with the fact that my schedule sucks right now and I'm dry heaving into trash cans multiple times a day, I cant take it any more!
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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    @bbrahmbhatt I’m sorry that sounds incredibly frustrating.

    so I’ve lost 10 pounds now this pregnancy, but I’m definitely able to eat complete junk. Afterwards I get a bit of a bloated belly look, but it’s clearly just food as it’s only for about an hour after eating. Tonight my MIL made a comment after we got Chinese takeout that I am definitely showing my “pooch” as she so kindly put it. I know everyone shows in their own time and some people start showing early, but I really don’t think I am. I think hormones are making me a little more sensitive to the comment too.
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  • eahayeseahayes member
    @kvh22 totally agree- also such a good reminder when I read articles from bloggers or actors who are like "I didn't have a veggie for 14 weeks". Makes me feel better about my diet of bagels! 
    Also agree about trying to get protein when you can.. I swapped regular bagels for Dave's killer bagels because they have more protein, and trying to at least get some PB/almond butter in during the day.. it's been helping I think
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  • kvh22kvh22 member
    @eahayes "surviving, not thriving" has been my pandemic motto with us both working full time from home and the girls being at home quite a lot (I'm actually alone in my house for 3.5 hours right now for the first time since early March!). This very much applies to first tri right now for me as well. Tiny swaps can help. I try to have some yogurt or my yogurt drink in the morning to start with some protein. Maybe I eat a muffin after that but I try to start the day with protein.

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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    @kvh22 haha omg - I don't think I'd be able to help myself from saying something about that. 

    I've had two males in the past week comment and say something to the effect of "oh yeah, I guess you do look sort of pregnant" - I'm like WTFFF haha. I actually don't look pregnant (besides the fact that my boobs are HUGE), but I have been wearing quite flowy clothing because um its covid and why not? I want to be COMFY and I'm in my own house. But sheesh, men can be so dumb sometimes. 
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  • kvh22kvh22 member
    @theblondebump if it were my sister or a close friend I would probably tell them but my SIL and brother can be pretty selfish. SIL told me after the fact that she didn't want to invite me and my sister to their rehearsal dinner (that my dad paid for) b/c they each had 10 bridesmaids and groomsman (so 20 person bridal party) and they had other ppl they wanted there instead of us outside of the bridal party. It was supposed to be redeeming somehow that my brother didn't allow that. When I got upset about it and said I wish family was more important to them than their friends my brother and her didn't talk to me for like a year or something (I didn't realize for 6+ months b/c we aren't very close in our adult lives and live across the country anyways but then I was trying to tell my brother I was pregnant and he wouldn't answer the phone and talk to me for another 6 months). So basically, me saying anything would, I'm sure, turn into something horrible so it's just not worth the drama with them. They live in their own little world that revolves around themselves. To be fair, my brother eventually apologized for being immature about the whole thing but I had to harass him to get him to see that his behavior wasn't appropriate. And I still think I've only seen them twice since then. I've never met my just-turned-2 nephew and they've never met DD2. But we were going to fly back for thanksgiving 2 years ago when they came up but I had complications with my pregnancy and wasn't allowed to fly and they don't go see anyone's family for Christmas so there's not much I can do about it. I guess that turned into a separate vent lol.

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  • theblondebumptheblondebump member
    @kvh22 yikessss. I have to admit though its a relief to hear that other people also have drama with their siblings/families because lord knows DH and I do!! I actually still haven't even told my brother yet that I'm pregnant (even though we've told pretty much all of our families and many friends at this point) because we just don't really talk much. DH has ongoing drama with his sisters because they don't like me, but since its the first baby on his side of the family, everyone all of a sudden wants to kiss and make up. 
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  • kvh22kvh22 member
    Haha it is reassuring. I have issues with MIL (but she can also be great - it's complicated) and hearing other ppl talk about their crazy MIL drama also helps in a misery loves company way BUT also to put my stuff in perspective - like, at least she doesn't do xyz that this person experienced. I'm hoping the kids will help with things over time. Plus since we're moving back to family we'll actually see them more (anytime they visit my mom which is usually twice a year, just never when we were going which was always July 4th and Christmas and they refused to coordinate even though they drive and we fly). Between us we'll have a 3yo (us), a 2yo (them), a 1yo (us), and then these babies born just before my youngest turns 2yo due just over 2 weeks apart. We've got to get closer, right? I think I shared this but they told me they were pregnant over the phone when she was 7.5 weeks and I was just over 5 weeks and I did not reciprocate. The thought of texting or calling my brother about it makes me anxious so I had my mom tell them after the first trimester last time and will likely do the same this time. They lost the privilege of hearing it from me with their behavior. Kids do help to put some of the drama aside IMO but also create some more opportunities for clashes. I get all riled up about SIL's disregard for science (lying to her doc about her due date + refusing a dating scan to avoid induction instead of being honest and getting accurate medical advice, even if she chooses to refuse it, telling her doctor she'll check her blood sugar instead of doing the GD test and then NOT doing it, not getting MMR or flu shots and some others I think but I'm not sure which ones) and she gets preachy about "gentle parenting" which is fine but if you, your husband, and your son are getting less than 5hrs of sleep a night every night for 18 months, maybe some sort of sleep training would be helpful? End unintentional rant again. But I keep my mouth shut to keep the peace so here we are still on speaking terms.

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  • theletlerstheletlers member
    @kvh22 I get family drama! We moved closer to my family last winter because we were wanting more family help with the kids. And my MIL is more like the Facebook/fun spoiling grandma. And while it’s good for the kids to have that person, a few visits a year where we plan a special thing is better, and having someone who would let my sick child stay at their house for the day while we are at work is what we need on a regular basis. MIL always said she would watch the kids, but if she needed her hair or nails done, it was a nice day for a motorcycle ride, etc she would always get out of it and say she could help later. Unfortunately that’s not how employment works and I can’t just say “well my MIL decided today she needs her hair done, so can I come in later?” We actually didn’t hardly let her watch DS1 for over a year after she watched him for a few hours, never fed him and came home to poop dried and crusted on him because she didn’t change him. He was 18 months and her reason was “he said he wasn’t pooped.” and “I wasn’t sure if he was hungry or not, he never said anything about it.” After that we only let her watch him for like an hour max until he was old enough to go to the bathroom and say when he was hungry. One of the most frustrating  was when I had my appendix out and she “came to help” because I wasn’t supposed to do much but also had a 2.5 year old at the time, so she came over but then needed my help to feed the kid, change his diaper. and pull out toys and then she left an hour and a half later because she was so tired and needed a nap. Mind you I was 3 days post open surgery where the doctor made a four inch incision through my entire side muscle because of where my appendix was located and was 22 weeks pregnant...but she needed the nap because they had just gotten back from a vacation. Anyway...family relationships can be so good and so bad! 
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  • kvh22kvh22 member
    @theletlers OMG it's amazing your husband and any siblings he might have survived! I've heard about the grandmothers who seem to forget how to care for children. We're in kind of the opposite situation with my MIL...she puts too much pressure on when we only see her a few times a year. We're moving back to be closer to family (I've been on the west coast for 9 years and DH for 7). Luckily our families live 10 mins apart from each other. MIL is a bit too old to take care of the kids by herself when she's younger but I'm hoping between me working from home, MIL, my mom, and my sister, that we can cover this baby until about a year to start daycare. But she couldn't be my full-time care if I were out of the house. As it stands, she cannot change a diaper on the floor b/c she can't get back up once she's on the floor and she can't lift a toddler up to changing table height, isn't confident carrying a baby up and down stairs, etc. so it's a bit dicey. *My* bigger concern is that my kids have sensitive skin and she seemed to change them too much and irritate their bottoms with the wipes (even though we use water wipes). And I know that my MIL is not a cook you dinner, clean you dishes, vacuum your house sort of MIL. Her "help" post baby would be holding baby so I plan to set the boundaries I need since I don't really need her brand of "help" right away.

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