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August 2020 Moms
blackgirlmagic
member
Weekly Randoms of 12/29
blackgirlmagic
member
Married: August 2012
TTC #1: July 2015
BFP 1: October 30, 2015; EDD: July 6, 2016- Team Pink
TTC #2: September 2019
Re: Weekly Randoms of 12/29
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Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
Because I go between scared something might not be right to scared there’s more than one.
@tyrion_ oh dear, that's a good point! We at least it's not me, but I will say the closer we get to my second scan, the more nerves I start to feel.... :#
We told MIL this evening. There were tears! I made her a lovely piece of hand print art, and gave her an awesome grandma mug, then I said there was one more thing and she opened the onesie - saw the ornament and took a closer look.... Omg between her and SIL everyone was bawling lol. Good times.
This is where it got awkward, bc DH calls me out and kinda flips out bc she had the ornament with the super early scan pic, and most people don't get scans that early, and he doesn't want her to know anything about having done IVF. I was like, I have no problem telling her
*TW*
<div class=" Spoiler">we had a couple early losses, so</div>
they wanted to check the placement and make sure it was starting out okay. 🤷 Nbd, seems plausible enough.
Well anyway, as she was just wrapping the gifts back up and putting them into the gift bag, I didn't know how to say I meant to keep the ornament, and by this time now our neice was there, so now I REALLY couldn't say something about taking back something I had just given her, bc that wouldn't even make sense. Bust she went into the bathroom for a second and I managed to pull the tissue paper parcel with the onesie + ornament and stash it in my purse. Then we drove her home, and I had DH give her back the onesie. 🤦🤦🤦 Uh.... Awkwardmuch???? Yes. 🤷 Ah well
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Longer answer? I'm not sure how much stems from the fact that our main issue was MFI? That's a huge bomb I guess to drop on his parents that PS your son is shooting complete blanks 🤷 part of it is likely also - and what he will <i>SAY</i> - is the fact that our Church doesn't condone any type of ART. And we are making a point to raise them in the Church, we have confessed and gotten right with God about it, and we have our plan to move forward and do our best to make it right (transfer all remaining embryos and not leave any behind in storage or to be destroyed). But our infertility struggle is not one that he feels at all heroic or victorious over; he feels a deep sense of personal shame I think, he claims again, notsomuch about his dx, but more that in his eyes we took the easy way out (i.e. all the treatment, which a lot of people may not have access to, and historically of course, nobody did!), vs. CNBC. He's still open to adoption too, once our IVF chapter is behind us; he even brought it up again this evening. But his sister is the only one who knows, because I confided in her much earlier in the process, and the farther along we got, he made it clear he doesn't even want the kids to know they were conceived through IVF. 🤦 His feelings may change over time, and I can't say I personally have the same level of feeling about the choices we made to grow our family, but it's also not my diagnosis, so I have to respect his decision not to blow up his spot.
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I'm so exhausted though. In the last 2 weeks I've been to urgent care twice, once for the flu, and once for the ear drum I ruptured while having the flu. Cheers to the next 8 weeks of keeping my ear dry and waiting for the ringing to stop.
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@duck_duck_goose thanks. ❤️ We feel so lucky and blessed each and every day, just to have DD, and God willing another on the way... Just so lucky. I'm hoping once we finish all our transfers at least, he will have some peace.
@blackgirlmagic time will tell, I guess. I'm so grateful for outlets like TB community, and a bff who also went through it, otherwise I don't know how I could keep it all in. For now it's just this nagging thought, wondering if SIL may have slipped and maybe MIL already knows, but just won't ever <i>say</i> that she knows??? Ugh. So stressful. I agree that it's a big thing and I don't believe there's such a thing as burying a secret alive. :/ so who knows
***possible TW***
I went for my first US today. The doctor couldn’t find the baby, but she said I could be earlier than we thought (which I know I ovulated late) and that puts me at 5+5. LMP puts me at 6 weeks today.
@BusinessWife That's a lot to keep in! I doubt anyone thought anything about the early scan. Also I'm glad you got your ornament back!
DD born June 2016
Second due August 2020 (team green!)
DD born June 2016
Second due August 2020 (team green!)
@wildermind Im sorry that your appt was so stressful. It always makes me feel better when the doctors aren't concerned though, even if youre feeling like a nervous wreck. FX that its just a little early!
@businesswife Man, that sounds so difficult. Poor DH. It would be hard for me to not tell my children that, but I want to be pretty open about things like that to my children. I hope that as time passes, it gets easier for you both.
@tyrion_ Twins would be the scariest blessing ever. My life is chaos with one two year old, much less that and twins!!
@WishesSheCouldCook Happy anniversary! hope you guys had a good day!
@photographerwife I’m sorry people cant keep their mouth shut.
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@wildermind Wishing peace for you after that unsettling appointment. Agree with everyone else -- I'd take a lot of comfort in your OB's lack of concern; they've seen so much more than we have and a late O sounds like a very reasonable and likely explanation. Hope Tuesday comes quick!
@BusinessWife I feel for your husband. That would be a lot for anyone to process, but I'm so glad you're in a good place with everything and hope he eventually finds himself sharing in that peace. My friend recently went through IVF, and her husband once made a comment about their ages and how many years it might take to transfer all their embryos. (He was worried about a C section and that imposing an 18-month gap between delivery and subsequent transfers.) I didn't ask any follow-up questions because so not my place, but I'm assuming it's a similar ethical or religious commitment, which I very much understand.
Add me to the list of people slightly worried about twins. My cousin is currently pregnant with spontaneous identical twin girls so it's been on my mind for a couple of months.
@BusinessWife Wow, that is a lot to keep to yourself. While I completely understand YH not wanted the world to know about his issue, if you wanted to share with your family/friends your experience, couldn't you simply say something like "we had issues"? People don't seem to press further than that. Either way, I hope he eventually comes to terms with it, and you have many healthy little babies ❤
@wildermind I'm sorry your appointment gave you anxiety, but at least the dr isn't concerned, so that's good! Hoping it's just early and next appointment you'll see your little one.
Dating 4/2008
Married 6/2016
TTC #1 9/2019
BFP 12/13/2019!
EDD 8/27/2020 Baby Girl
@emiliadkay I’ve been looking at gmc terrains, and Chevy equinoxes. Originally I was looking at rav-4s and cr-vs, but they’re more compact and higher priced than I’d like to spend right now. Since I only work part time now, my budget is less than it was!
@photographerwife I'm sorry someone spilled the beans like that! That would irritate me too!
If i randomly see someone post something they love for their baby that i think i might use I add it.
So many pregnancy announcements on my fb feed this week.
I would love to share that we are. But I'm just not there yet. I'm still not convinced anything is ok.
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020