@therealbitts that's a perfect way to describe it! haha I finally had to hike my ankle up to my knee to tie my shoe because it wasn't going well otherwise haha.
@ibabyloveb87 that makes me feel a little better! Lol
@babyroma Definitely have been feeling the discomfort bending down for the past few weeks. It’s nothing bad if I’m picking something up off the ground real quick but shoes, ugh! I’m gonna need all the slip ons for the rest of this pregnancy lol!
@babyroma I have been somewhat uncomfortable bending over for a couple of weeks. I am 21 weeks along tomorrow. It is also getting to the point where it is physically impossible to reach my feet in some positions.
@babyroma Maybe it has to do with how tall we are too? I remember with my son thinking the shoe tying and leg shaving things were urban myth. I can still touch my toes no sweat at 20w, but I’m 5’6” and have plenty of torso- like baby is still below my belly button.
I’ve been having occasional headaches— not horrible, but persistent. I try to stay hydrated but am still tempted to take Tylenol once a week or so. Just one dose helps me a lot. I’ll ask my doctor when I see her again in a few weeks, but how much Tylenol do you personally think would be erring on the safe side? I know most evidence says some should be safe, but I’ve read up on newer studies that suggest there *could* be a small risk *if*... Etc. What do you think? Should I save the pain reliever for more extreme pain/if something lead to a fever? Am I overthinking it? Probably 😂
It’s so crazy seeing how tall everyone is for some reason? I think @craftywitch is definitely right. I’m 5’7” but I still don’t really look pregnant with my normal clothes.
Im pregnant with my third and I think my stomach is huge already but I’m 5’7 and can still bend pretty comfortably. So I agree with @craftywitch that height must have a lot to do with it
@craftywitch I'm 5'9....lol but like I said I'm pretty overweight so I'm guessing that also plays a factor.
Speaking of heights though...We're also predicting a quite tall baby. MH is 6'6" and his mom likes to remind me he was a quite long baby Haha
@tusconftm I would definitely check with your doc, but I also occasionally take Tylenol when my headache won’t budge. I’ve done this with all of my prior pregnancies and no issues. I try to take it sparingly, but I also don’t let myself suffer all day if I can’t get my headache to go away from hydration and a little caffeine (I always try that first).
@babyroma MH is 6'2", but his family assured me that he was a very normal sized baby (7lbs and change); he didn't become giant until puberty. I was a very small baby, so I'm hoping that together we make a small baby.
@noxacanthus hubs and all his siblings were giants from birth. Hubs is 6’2 and his younger brothers (twins) are 6’5. His younger twin brothers were each almost 8lbs! I’m worried about big babies....
@Swiftlet I’m guessing you’re planning on a csection with the twins? Regardless, don’t be too scared of big babies. As mentioned above I’m 4’10”, and DS was 8lb 9.6oz. I went to 41 weeks and had no problem growing him or pushing him out!
I'm putting together little gift bags for two of my pregnant friends. One of them is a STM and I sneakily asked her for a list of things a new mom might need, so I already got her some stuff off that list. One of the things she listed was lactation cookies - any STM+ have a favorite brand? Or any additional recommendations? (So far I have nipple cream, nursing pads, a heat/cold pack for breastfeeding and a nursing nightgown.)
@daffodil_shoe My OB said she'd let me decide as long as it was safely possible (both babies measuring similarly and properly positioned closer to delivery). I told her that I want to do what's best for them first and foremost and really don't have a strong opinion on csection vs vaginal. One of them is breech right now (only 18w) so we have time to watch him. I'm leaning toward a planned Csection to eliminate any additional stress but we'll see! And that makes me feel better!
@Swiftlet that’s great to hear! If our twin moms want to try a vaginal, they attempt to deliver in our OR. That way if something doesn’t go as planned, we can get things moving quickly. But most plan for a csection because at least one is usually breech.
@swiftlet homemade are the best! You can premake the dough, roll it into balls and freeze them, and mom can bake 2-3 at a time as needed. That’s what I did!
@therealbitts that’s exactly what I’ve been doing. :-) ... I try everything and wait a few hours and if it’s still there, I take one. Will report back after chat with dr.
@Swiftlet what a thoughtful friend! I would maybe throw in a gift card to a restaurant with good carry out because no one has time to cook for at least the first few weeks.
@swiftlet I might skip the lactation cookies because a) you never know if someone will have an oversupply (like I did and then you do NOT need them haha) and b) you never know what tastes they like. When they have the baby you could bake some which could be sweet, there are lots of recipes on-line. I love @doodleoodle 's idea about the giftcard for takeout. Our MOMS club does a meal train for six weeks of meals 2x week and I am really looking forward to that LOL
Me: 38, DH: 36 Married Jan 2008 DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18" so in love Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
A little late to the party, but if you guys want to boost your immunity during cold and flu season I highly recommend elderberry syrup. Maybe placebo, but once I start that we can usually knock out anything within a few days. We also do vitamin C and vitamin D for support. Manuka honey has antimicrobial and antiviral properties as well. Being sick pregnant sucks!
FTM here... how long did your mom stay if she stayed with you after baby was born? I know multiple people for whom it was a while (multiple months). In those cases, mom lived out of state, as mine does.
My mom assumes I’ll want her gone in two weeks, but I doubt it. I don’t live near any family, and don’t have a large friend network here. I just moved here in the past year or so... we’re part of a church and a Martial Arts gym, but beyond that I don’t have a ton of connections here. I got weepy yesterday being sad that I don’t live around family. How have others dealt with it (or planing to deal with it)?
@um_thor I'm in the same situation! My family lives 5 hours away and I only have one real set of close friends here. I wish my mom could stay with me for a month! That would be great, but I th ik NJ they'll only be able to come up for a week or so. My sister has already gotten permission to skip a week of school. MH mentioned his mom might come out for a month once we move into a bigger place but I'm not confident that will happen.
@um_thor if your mom is able and willing to stay with you, and you want her there, I say take her as long as she can stay! My family is all within 30 minutes of me, but they all work. I know I would love if my mom cold stay with me to help. (Our parents are all great about babysitting occasionally though!)
@um_thor I honestly think this is something you won't know until baby gets here. My family also lives 6 hours away and my in-laws two and they don't drive on highways so we are basically alone. I told my mom I did NOT want anyone here and we wanted to spend time as our own little family for the first few weeks. What a mistake that was. I had a cesarean and really bad PPD and within a week called my mom sobbing and she came up and stayed with us for a week and it was so nice. This time my stepmom is coming up to help out with DD1 and it will be really nice to have her around. My MIL thinks she is coming and that DH is going to go pick her up to get her (4 hours roundtrip) bahaha - NOT happening.
Anyway, as far as your question, the first month is the hardest. So if you have a really awesome mom with unlimited time to spend with you I would ask her if she could stay as long as you need and up to a month.
To both you and @babyroma - we have been here for three years and hardly knew anyone before we had DD1. I suggest you join a MOM's club, but even if you don't, you will meet other people with small kids through daycare, activities, etc., so don't worry. The best friend I've made here so far is someone I met at my old job and found out that we live nearby and both have small kids and started talking about that and now hang out and our husbands get along (Her husband is like respect because I know Star Trek episodes LOL)
Even if you had cool adult friends unless they also have small kids unless you are really close you will probably drift apart for a couple of years anyway. None of my childfree kids understand - but other parents do and are more accepting of last minute cancellations because kid is sick, etc. etc. I have one friend couple that acts like they totally get it and then invite us and DD1 to the kind a restaurant that has a two hour wait or that doesn't have high chairs because it's a freaking bar. It's not intentional but ARGH. (Wow this turned into a rant)
Me: 38, DH: 36 Married Jan 2008 DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18" so in love Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
@um_thor If you have a good relationship with your mom and she will be helpful- cook, clean, respect that you and your husband need time with the baby, and keep you calm then let her stay as long as she can. We live very close to both sets of parents and both sets are amazing so I always appreciate any and all help.
I felt pretty good after my first and my mom watched ds1 for like an hour and a half so my h and I could go grab a quick lunch like a week and a half pp.
@um_thor with DS, my mom stayed with us for 2 weeks. She’s super helpful and would keep him so I could nap during the day, and she helped middle of the night so DH could sleep once he was back at work. She would help with laundry and dishes too. I want her to stay longer this time, even if she stays at their beach house for part of the time. Mostly because with a RCS I won’t be able to pick up my 3 y/o, and he loves to be held sometimes. Anyway, I think it’s a very personal decision but in my case, I wouldn’t have had it any other way. My mom also doesn’t work, so she has lots of flexibility.
Me:33 DH: 34 Married: May 2011 TTC #1: May 2015 DS: 10/20/2016 TTC #2: June 2019 #2 EDD: 2/20/2020
@um_thor I agree with @leksiL that you might not know until baby gets here. My mom has always been close by (she watches my boys during the day while I’m at work). But a few days postpartum, I am kind of a mess. My hormones definitely take several days to stabilize, so I would just tell her to be prepared in case that happens to you. I’m sure she will understand, but it’s always kind of a surprise to me (and my family members) how emotional and anxious I am right after giving birth. The good news is that things have leveled out pretty quickly for me in the past, and then it is great having her around during my mat leave! We are definitely a team and that helps A LOT!
@um_thor, adding on to what others have said. If your mom is helpful (will jump in to do dishes, cook food, do laundry) and not just want to hold the baby 24/7 while you do all those things AND if you and your husband have a good relationship with her then you may want her to stay awhile. For us, we wanted time alone as a new family to figure it out without anyone commenting on how they used to do it. I love my mom but I think she would have been more about baby snuggles and less about general help around the house. Now that we have DD, my parents will come stay when we give birth and possibly for a little bit after so we can make sure DD is getting the attention she needs. I will have to be clear though that they are there to help and I will not be serving appetizers and cocktails at 5pm.
I’ve been having occasional headaches— not horrible, but persistent. I try to stay hydrated but am still tempted to take Tylenol once a week or so. Just one dose helps me a lot. I’ll ask my doctor when I see her again in a few weeks, but how much Tylenol do you personally think would be erring on the safe side? I know most evidence says some should be safe, but I’ve read up on newer studies that suggest there *could* be a small risk *if*... Etc. What do you think? Should I save the pain reliever for more extreme pain/if something lead to a fever? Am I overthinking it? Probably 😂
I’ve been having headaches and migraines since the pregnancy started. My doc said Tylenol up to the amount listed on the bottle is absolutely fine for baby. I still only take them when it’s really bad but she said up to 3000mg a day is still safe for baby.
@um_thor Completely and totally personal. My whole family is out of state and I have/had no one to help me with a newborn, but I didn't allow my mother to visit until 4 weeks PP and only for a week, and the in-laws visited at 6 weeks PP and only for a long weekend. Honestly I didn't want their help and don't like visitors. I wanted to do everything my way and my husband is on board with that and great at supporting me however I ask. Same plan this time- absolutely no family until 4-6 weeks PP (only my BFF and sister can drop by and only to hang out until I kick them out). I like to hold my baby and bathe with my baby and take my baby outside and do skin-to-skin round the clock and breastfeed while on the go in the carrier and basically just rest and relax and enjoy getting to know my newborn. I don't like sharing, hate advice I didn't ask for, and don't want anyone else inserting themselves into my fourth trimester. I've also found most guests will kind of sort of help with a chore or some food, but they never do it my way, and they mainly want to hold the baby and keep me from napping both of which I hate. Just know it's okay to feel absolutely however you feel and to voice what you want and need from other people, and that might be loads of support, and it might be for them to go the hell away.
My only friends IRL are my sister and my BFF who moved out to Colorado after we did, before that it was just DH and I all the time. I'm in a couple Facebook Moms groups and those are good for meeting people who will understand your schedule and needs with kids, although I haven't gotten super close to anyone as there are always kids between us so getting to know each other is harder.
@craftywitch I love your honesty girl keep it up! My MIL FIL BIL and his gf came over the day after we got home from the hospital and we treated them like guests but I was just in so much pain from having a cesarean two days before I couldn’t walk straight and was exhausted walking across a room but I couldn’t bear to be away from my baby. In retrospect I wish they had waited although no one consulted me before they showed up. This time I am going to ask them to wait.
Me: 38, DH: 36 Married Jan 2008 DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18" so in love Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
Re: The Great Question Thread
DH: 34
Married: May 2011
TTC #1: May 2015
DS: 10/20/2016
TTC #2: June 2019
#2 EDD: 2/20/2020
@ibabyloveb87 that makes me feel a little better! Lol
Diagnosed with PCOS & Hashimoto's
https://www.howsweeteats.com/2015/02/lactation-cookies/
That recipe is the bomb
Married Jan 2008
DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18"
Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
My mom assumes I’ll want her gone in two weeks, but I doubt it. I don’t live near any family, and don’t have a large friend network here. I just moved here in the past year or so... we’re part of a church and a Martial Arts gym, but beyond that I don’t have a ton of connections here. I got weepy yesterday being sad that I don’t live around family. How have others dealt with it (or planing to deal with it)?
I'm in the same situation! My family lives 5 hours away and I only have one real set of close friends here.
I wish my mom could stay with me for a month! That would be great, but I th ik NJ they'll only be able to come up for a week or so. My sister has already gotten permission to skip a week of school.
MH mentioned his mom might come out for a month once we move into a bigger place but I'm not confident that will happen.
Anyway, as far as your question, the first month is the hardest. So if you have a really awesome mom with unlimited time to spend with you I would ask her if she could stay as long as you need and up to a month.
To both you and @babyroma - we have been here for three years and hardly knew anyone before we had DD1. I suggest you join a MOM's club, but even if you don't, you will meet other people with small kids through daycare, activities, etc., so don't worry. The best friend I've made here so far is someone I met at my old job and found out that we live nearby and both have small kids and started talking about that and now hang out and our husbands get along (Her husband is like respect because I know Star Trek episodes LOL)
Even if you had cool adult friends unless they also have small kids unless you are really close you will probably drift apart for a couple of years anyway. None of my childfree kids understand - but other parents do and are more accepting of last minute cancellations because kid is sick, etc. etc. I have one friend couple that acts like they totally get it and then invite us and DD1 to the kind a restaurant that has a two hour wait or that doesn't have high chairs because it's a freaking bar. It's not intentional but ARGH. (Wow this turned into a rant)
Married Jan 2008
DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18"
Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
We live very close to both sets of parents and both sets are amazing so I always appreciate any and all help.
I felt pretty good after my first and my mom watched ds1 for like an hour and a half so my h and I could go grab a quick lunch like a week and a half pp.
DH: 34
Married: May 2011
TTC #1: May 2015
DS: 10/20/2016
TTC #2: June 2019
#2 EDD: 2/20/2020
My only friends IRL are my sister and my BFF who moved out to Colorado after we did, before that it was just DH and I all the time. I'm in a couple Facebook Moms groups and those are good for meeting people who will understand your schedule and needs with kids, although I haven't gotten super close to anyone as there are always kids between us so getting to know each other is harder.
Married Jan 2008
DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18"
Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020