How and when do you plan on telling others you are pregnant?
How did you tell your partner?
Who will you tell next?
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
How and when are your telling those you work with?
Are you making an social media announcement?
We all have different ideas. There is not right and wrong, there is only what is right for you and your partner. Share your plans here. Share the reactions (good and bad) that you get here.
Re: Pregnancy Announcements: How and When to let the cat out of the bag!
How did you tell your partner? We were about to take part in our cycle tradition of wine and sushi and I had such a strong sense of smell I was like let’s just take a test- I’m the one who always kinda saw something and he’s always the one like- love you but no. I had a cute onesie but just shoved it in his face immediately.
Who will you tell next? Our parents! Waiting until after our 8 week apt
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? We wanted to do it in person. We made up some BS about DH getting a work recognition and are having both parents fly in (since we don’t have enough time off). We really wanted to tell them in person and will tell them separately once they each get in in different ways
How and when are your telling those you work with? Ugh, I started a new job in June so I’m going to wait until after first trimester to tell my boss, I told some other colleagues today at 6 weeks since morning sickness is real and they’ve had to cover for me.
Are you making an social media announcement? Maybe at Christmas, my brother is getting married in October and I don’t want to steal 0 of their thunder since we got engaged and married during their engagement.
How did you tell your partner? I told him the day after I took the test since I couldn’t manage to get him alone day of. He was totally shocked and asked if we had talked about this! I told him yes but it’s been like a year and a half since I went off BC and we weren’t trying trying, we were just doing our thing and if it happened, it happened. He’s been really extra nice since so idk if that means he’s happy now or not...
Who will you tell next? Both of our parents but probably not til after the first appointment/ ultrasound.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? I am really just waiting because pregnancy brain is real and having to constantly think and talk about being pregnant/ baby is exhausting to me. Also my sister is about 12 weeks with her second also and I am deathly afraid my mom is going to be less than thrilled at the thought of having to help us both at the same time.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I want to wait as long as possible to tell work because I am the manager of a small department. I am hoping to make it to December 1 before I have to tell them. I will tell my boss shortly after I tell my department.
Are you making an social media announcement? I will probably make an announcement at New Years, hopefully will be able to tell that baby is coming and if it’s a boy or girl.
How did you tell your partner? I made a onesie that said “Baby (ourlastname) 2020” and set it so he’d see it as soon as he got home
Who will you tell next? Our parents will be the next people in about a month
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? Thanksgiving just makes sense because that’s the next time we’ll be seeing our families all in one place. I’d prefer to wait to tell other people until we’re out of the first tri
How and when are your telling those you work with? Depending on what my doctor suggests at my prenatal appt, I may have to tell my supervisor fairly soon just because of workplace hazards. I’ll probably just tell him and then let coworkers gradually find out
Are you making an social media announcement? Yes around Christmas time
Partner: I sent him a pic of the positive pregnancy test to his phone 🤦♀️ I wanted to do something more creative but I’m tired lol
Who’s next: Immidiate family after appt
Waiting to tell: I would love to have waited but I know it’s suspect when I stop going to family functions or stay in my room when family visits. I didn’t get very positive responses for this one mostly because of how terrible pregnancy is for me, my mom thinks I’m crazy for having a third, but we know what we are getting into and have planned accordingly.
Im a SAHM so no worries about work this time. 😁
Planning on doing a creative announcement with our Christmas pics.
MH couldn't wait, so we told our immediate families and closest friends first (since my birthday party was literally two days after we found out, so there was no way I could hide it then), and then waited a week before posting to social media.
How did you tell your partner?
I waited until he got home from work (TORTURE) and just gave him the positive pregnancy test. He was literally in the middle of eating a piece of lasagna, lol.
Who will you tell next?
Everyone already knows, lol.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
This is our first pregnancy, and while I would have preferred to have waited until after our first prenatal ultrasound (on Oct. 9th), MH simply couldn't hold it in any longer. I'm cautiously optimistic, so have refrained from posting anything pregnancy-related to social media beyond our announcement.
How and when are your telling those you work with?
Work already knows. In my branch of the military, we're required to notify our chain of command within two weeks of a positive pregnancy test.
Are you making an social media announcement?
Already did. We laid out a onesie with green booties and a pacifier, with our wedding rings and one of our handfasting cords from our wedding ceremony around it with "Coming soon...May 2020" as the description. Simple.
Due with baby #2: Feb 2022
We are planning on telling our close friends and family at DD's birthday party on Nov 17. The plan is to have DD open her last gift from us and it will be a "I'm a big sister" book or shirt. I will be around 14/15 weeks.
How did you tell your partner?
I wake up much earlier than him. I took 2 different tests and left them on the bathroom counter for when he woke up. I was downstairs and heard him get up and get ready. About 30 minutes later I went up and he was confused if this meant I was pregnant. I said I am pregnant and that was it. He had to go to work.
Who will you tell next?
We are keeping it to ourselves, work, and medical professionals until DDs birthday.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
Usually I like to tell family and a few friends right away in case there is a loss I like the support. However this time it is just fun to keep it to ourselves.
How and when are your telling those you work with?
DH told his work managers already, but not his coworkers. I'm not sure when I will tell my boss/team. There is only 6 of us, I will probably bring in treats.
Are you making an social media announcement?
Most likely. I will be making a Pokemon Go OH? Egg shirt to wear over thanksgiving for extended family. Maybe I'll take a picture with that, or I will wait until around Christmas when we know the sex.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019How did you tell your partner? I took a test at 6am because I had to pee and didn't want to waste FMU. I crawled back into bed and tapped him, and he grumbled at me because I woke him up. Then I told him, and he gave me a big hug and we went back to sleep.
Who will you tell next? We'll probably tell our families in person if possible, but I'd like to wait until closer to 12-13 weeks.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? We're waiting as long as possible to tell people, based on previous losses.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I'll probably wait until November or so to tell people here. Luckily it's getting colder and I can wear big flowy sweaters that hide my condition.
Are you making an social media announcement? I'm not sure on this one. *TW: loss
After having 2 losses in the last 10 months, I know how much a social media announcement can really sting. So I'm not really sure the best way to do it, given that I don't want to cause anyone else any emotional pain. I may wait until Thanksgiving or so time frame and tell our loss story, followed by our announcement. But I'm also still really cautiously optimistic at this point because PGAL anxiety is very real.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
How did you tell your partner? So this is super romantic - but he was sitting on the toilet (his parents were visiting and it was hard to get him alone) and I brought in a shirt that I had previously bought for DS about being a big brother and held it up and said "I bought this shirt for --- a while ago, do you like it?" It took him a second but he said, really? And then I showed him the test. He was like okay I actually see that line. (Because I'm a POAS addict I sometimes show him tests and am like do you see that?? when there is nothing there lol).
Who will you tell next? Uh, probably the IL's around 10 weeks because we are visiting down there. I think they are already suspicious because they were here last weekend to escape the hurricane (literally like right when I got my BFP) and I turned down wine two nights in a row. I never turn down wine....
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? Pretty much everyone else lol.
How and when are your telling those you work with? Ugh, so this one is tricky for me. I work privately for a family and coverage for maternity leave will be tricky. I need to wait and tell my "bosses" (the family) first - I'm thinking sometime around Thanksgiving... So I will have to keep it a secret from everyone at work until then.
Are you making an social media announcement? I don't think so. Much later on I might post a regular photo that happens to show my bump but I don't think I will do any formal announcement this time.
@shamrocandroll Not sure why, but it definitely made me laugh that you called pregnancy "hiding your condition."
@shanana_3 I'm sorry you get so sick during pregnancy.
@JStill0603 I bet your mom will be thrilled!
I’m not sure that I plan to tell anyone this go around. DS1 was diagnosed with leukemia last year and a lot of family have expressed that they don’t think more kids would be a good idea. DS1 is doing great, but has about 2 years left of treatment and I know some people think I can’t handle it all.
How did you tell your partner?
POAS and said I told you so. 🤣
Who will you tell next?
Likely no one, if I start showing, I won’t deny it but I also won’t freely offer the information up.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
DS1’s illness and I’ve previously brought up babies to family members in the past and had less than enthusiastic reactions from most. DH and I have been married 8 years and live a pretty nice life so I’m unsure of the negative reactions, but still not ready to listen to it for the next 9 months.
How and when are your telling those you work with?
SAHM. Whew. Glad I don’t have to do that.
Are you making an social media announcement?
Unlikely. Maybe a few weeks before EDD. Depends on how long I make it before people start noticing.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
thank you for the support! Calling/texting my family might be a good idea even though it is less personal. I just think my sister was hurt by my moms reaction and I can’t imagine what she will think about us having another. I know I already have my hands full but I am so excited for DS to be a big brother and have a sibling who doesn’t leave every other weekend. We also live a rather comfortable life and if my parents are unable or unwilling to help with childcare, it won’t be an issue to obtain childcare elsewhere so I’m a little confused as to the judgement as well. I know once LO is here, everyone will be thrilled.
How did you tell your partner? I took a test before my second beta and it was positive and I showed him. Then I texted him my beta numbers after I got the call confirming the pregnancy was viable. Super romantic.
Who will you tell next? Everyone else after 13 weeks.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? I've had five losses in the last two years, so I won't believe this is happening for a while. Plus, I'm totally superstitious and feel like I'd be jinxing myself.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I'll wait until 13 weeks and then tell my boss first. I think she'll be excited, however, I just interviewed for a promotional position and if I get it, that could be a little awkward. "Hi. Thanks for the promotion and a lot more responsibility. I'll be leaving for three months." 😬
Are you making an social media announcement? Nope, I'm not big on social media. If I don't like someone enough to call them, they don't need to know I'm pregnant.
@ruby696 Ahhhh PGAL romance, haha. I've used up all my cute announcement ideas and have now resorted to waking him up with pee sticks at 6am. Also, I got a promotion right before announcing my maternity leave. It shouldn't be a factor. If you've earned it, then you've earned it! It all worked out okay.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
@rox7777 @JStill0603 I hope you don't get any negative reactions, your family planning is not their decision!
@ruby696 I actually hid the last couple pee sticks from DH because I didn't want him to think I was crazy! Well he saw the trash, so now I showed him. I've taken 6 at home tests in the last 8 days.
@zaslawlz That is nice of you to be sensitive to your brother and his marriage. Last pregnancy I announced super late to be sensitive to a friend with a loss and another friend who announced.
@yodamama That is so cute how excited YH is.
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019Well last night I sent DH to the store with both kids to buy pregnancy tests so it was very creative and romantic when I peed on a stick while both kids were playing in the bathroom. I texted my long distance bffs last night, and I’ve told one of my previous BMB since they knew we’ve been trying for a while.
I’ll tell my parents today probably on FaceTime with DD2 wearing a big brother shirt. I don’t want to tell my ILs yet. We’ll see how I feel in the next couple of days.
How did you tell your partner? See above.
Who will you tell next?
I don’t know. Probably my sisters, and some friends in person. I don’t really have a plan. I’ll tell the ILs either at a family wedding in October if we go or on FaceTime.
Why are you waiting or not waiting to tell?
We want 3 or 4 and I have had a loss previously so I just am kind of taking this one as it goes. I’ll tell the people I want for support if something happens, and everyone else when the mood strikes.
How is and when are you telling those you work with?
SAHM so yeah.
Are you making a social media announcement?
Probably yes. Since our friends and family are scattered all over, we will probably do something around Christmas time. Maybe in November. Plus as the third kid, it seems rude to skip announcing them publicly. Lol.
How did you tell your partner? I had told him a few times that cycle that I really felt like it was the one and was having some symptoms so when I couldn't wait any longer and finally took a test (at 9DPO in the afternoon....) and it was positive I had to wait until my family left so I could tell him first. I just said uh hey you know how I mentioned I thought I might be pregnant? Well I peed on a stick and I am soooo.... and that was that. We're pretty romantic.
Who will you tell next? Either my good friend from high school or my mother in law. MIL is super sweet but literally can't keep a secret for anything so I'm trying to wait to tell her until we're ready to tell everyone so she doesn't spill the beans and ruin our fun of getting to announce. I'll be seeing my high school friend this weekend for my daughter's party so if we get a second alone I might go ahead and tell her.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? I always worry about everything going wrong so prefer to keep it under wraps until at least after 10-12 weeks depending on dr appointments and ultrasounds.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I'll probably wait until 12 weeks. I may tell my boss first or just bring in some food for the department with a cute little announcement left out with it.
Are you making an social media announcement? Yea, I think we'll end up doing something around Halloween because that should be about 12 weeks.
That's so true! There are some people you cannot tell until you are ready to tell EVERYONE because they cannot keep a secret. It's so much more fun to share the news yourself too, but again, they are just excited for you which is whey they have to tell you secret and tell EVERYONE.
Last time I saw my SIL she started a conversation by saying, I know your mom wasn't supposed to tell me this, but... (I really thought I was safe telling my mom a secret, there goes that idea!)
How and when do you plan on telling others you are pregnant? The only people who know so far are my previous BMB.
How did you tell your partner? Two days before I actually tested, I told him I thought I was pregnant because of how I was feeling, so he knew it was coming. On the morning I tested, I handed him my pee stick while he was still lying in bed.
Who will you tell next? Probably our families after our first ultrasound.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? With DD we waited till after our first US to tell our families and that was fine, so we're doing that again. Also (TW) I had a loss last cycle at 5w2d, so we really want to make sure everything is okay first.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I have one coworker who is my work wife, so I'll probably end up telling her sooner rather than later. I will tell my principal toward the end of the first tri, probably after our 12/13 week US. I'll tell my students last, but around the same time. We have to be ready for it to be public before telling the students because they can't keep secrets.
Are you making an social media announcement? Yes, probably around the beginning of November.
Sorry about being THAT person on the BMB. I just love organization.
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
How did you tell your partner? Didn't yet! But I put a little onsie on our bed w/ a positive test and a note. We'll see when he sees it when he gets home later!
Who will you tell next? our parents, but probably not until I have my first appt. 6 weeks or so.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? No particular reason. I'll probably share with my close friends before the end of the first-tri, because it's too hard to hide when we get together and I decline wine!
How and when are your telling those you work with? I'll wait at least until the end of the first trimester. I work with 99% men, and I work remotely, so it's like a weird thing to bring up on a conference call. thankfully my boss has 5 kids, so he'll be supportive I'm sure!
Are you making an social media announcement? undecided!
How did you tell your partner? I got up mid dinner, POAS, came back nonchalantly and checked the clock. When time was up I went back and promptly screamed “OH F*CK ME IN THE ASS. DAVID NOOOOO” which I guess was a hilarious way for him to find out and also the feelings have changed since lol
Who will you tell next? My boss and students, coworkers
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? Graduation is in June and I just got back from maternity leave less than a month ago so I feel it’ll be awkward
How and when are your telling those you work with? Probably casually in passing like last time
Are you making an social media announcement? We didn’t do it last time but think it might be fun to announce around new year’s
Married Sept. 2013
DS1: Nov 11, 2016
MMC: 11/16/18 (9w6d)
CP: 2/3/19 (5w3d)
BFP! 8/24/19
DS2: May 10, 2020
How did you tell your partner? Just flat out told him. I was nervous because it happened faster than with DD and he was stunned. I was out of town and had to wait 2 days.
Who will you tell next? Parents and then maybe IL. DH insisted with DD that his parents got to know at the same time. I might try to convince him to wait until after our first appointment in a couple weeks.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? I just really prefer waiting until the 2nd trimester. I think this time around I don't mind a couple closer friends knowing.
How and when are your telling those you work with? One coworker knew before DH, they were with me while we were away for the weekend! I teach so, preferably second trimester. With DD I didn't tell the students until they started asking me. It was actually really funny because they tried to ask as slyly as possible so not to be rude. I was probably 26 weeks. I'll tell admins at 12 weeks but will try to wait for students.
Are you making an social media announcement? We did for DD. I'd like to put it on our xmas cards for the wider announcement first this time!
I'll be back for some tags!
How did you tell your partner? He knew about my beta blood test, but I lied to him and said I missed their call back. I hung a onesie in our doorway that said “guess what” for him to find when he got home from work.
Who will you tell next? I’m working really hard on not telling EVERYONE! But at this point I’m hoping I can keep my lips sealed until week 12. We went through 6 years of IF, so I’m having a hard time not shouting it from the rooftops
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? Because of the usual.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I’m a nanny, my bosses knew we were going through IVF and I had to take off work for the transfer and bed rest following. I told them Saturday when I scheduled my first ultrasound as I will need time off for that as well.
Are you making an social media announcement? Yes, Halloween is our 12 week mark, so probably around then. Although we are big into fishing, so I’m thinking it will be a fishing related announcement.
How did you tell your partner? We were together when I tested. Took a cheap dollar store one. Then went out and got two more Clear Blue including a digital with weeks indicator. All positive!
Who will you tell next?We are just playing it by ear. When we are with people and the mood strikes we will. Everyone who knows now are people we would turn to for support if needed.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?Not waiting really. But not calling people up at this point. Our family and close friends know.
How and when are your telling those you work with? I had to tell Work right away as part of my job deals with xrays. So isn’t safe to keep it a secret.
Are you making an social media announcement? Not really involved with social media.
I don't have a real plan - I like to wait until the end of the first trimester for most people. But last time (my second), I very unceremoniously told my parents around 7 weeks because I was so tired and couldn't handle a big announcement or keeping it a secret anymore. So that might happen again.
ETA: I'm very excited for my kids to know, especially the 3yo, but want to wait until she either notices or I'm like 20 weeks along and have confirmed that things are going okay.
How did you tell your partner?
I made things very confusing for him by telling him after I'd gotten a very faint result that I might be pregnant. He was unclear what that meant, and several days later I said something about being pregnant, and he was like, "what?" So then I tried to explain that I was pregnant but didn't really want to count it until I officially missed my period and he got even more confused but said he was happy.
Who will you tell next?
I was really close to telling my coworker / boss this week, because I was traveling with them and they kept asking if I was okay. But I'd really like to wait until I'm at least 6 weeks before saying anything - I don't think I can keep it in the whole first trimester since I'm already feeling sick and have like 5 more trips to take with them in that time.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
Because if it doesn't stick, I don't want to explain things to people. I honestly would like to tell my mom, but she weirdly had a really hard time keeping it a secret last time when I told her early, and kept making passive aggressive remarks like, "apparently I'm not allowed to tell anyone yet." Weird because she's a doctor and normally so good about keeping this stuff private, so I was really frustrated.
How and when are your telling those you work with?
I might tell the guys I travel with early (one of them is my boss), but honestly everyone else can just figure it out on their own.
Are you making a social media announcement?
No. Again, don't want to deal with the world knowing if things don't go well, but also I feel like it's a lot more fun to tell people in person.
Who will you tell next? We aren't as close with DH's family so we will probably tell them in a few weeks. This weekend we will be spending some time with our close friends. My best girlfriend is due in January and so I am excited to tell her, we bought DD a big sister shirt she will wear to their house so we will see how long it takes for someone to notice.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? We will wait to tell the whole world until I hit the second trimester. *TW* due to a previous loss we find it easier to not have to explain it to everyone and want it to be more private if something like that were to happen.
Are you making an social media announcement? At the second trimester we will announce on social media after we have told all close family and friends. I'm thinking we will do something cute with pumpkins and DD.
I’m still processing it myself, so it’ll probably be awhile. Last pregnancy I didn’t tell anyone (besides H) until 17 weeks.
How did you tell your partner?
After the kids went to bed we were sitting on the couch and I told him I had something to tell him and burst into tears and then couldn’t get another word out for a good 5 min. He just sat next to me saying “What is it? You’re worrying me. Can you just tell me? You’re starting to scare me.” So it was...memorable.
Who will you tell next?
Family. Probably will wait until after I go to the doctor.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
I am dreading telling my boss and co workers. I was just off from Feb-June of this year and my work is talking about extending maternity leave at my work to 6 months next year (which is awesome!) But I HATE that I feel guilty taking time off to be home with my baby.
Also, my sister is getting engaged very soon (he has the ring just hasn’t asked yet) and she was very excited that I would not be pregnant and would be able to be at the wedding the whole day and have fun in the wedding party so I’m worried this will put added stress on her when planning. (Even if I’m not pregnant I’ll likely have a breastfeeding infant so just more logistics to think about)
How and when are you telling those you work with? I didn’t tell them until I was over 20 weeks last time, so it will be just as long this time. Ideally after Christmas/New Years if I can hide the bump that long.
Are you making an social media announcement?
We probably won’t until after baby is born. I just feel like the people who I’m close to that I want to know will hear it in person and anyone else can find out after the birth. Also the less people annoyingly asking if baby is here yet at the end, the better.
I told my husband the day I got a positive. I've also told one close friend from college and two other friends who all had their first at the same time as me. All three of these women had babies this June.
How did you tell your partner?
Nothing dramatic, just that I was pregnant.
Who will you tell next?
My mom, probably.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell?
I'm not waiting to tell because they're all people I would tell if I had an MC.
How and when are your telling those you work with?
I'll probably tell my boss between 8-12 weeks. We get two months paid leave but I have a secret hope that I can get a third...
Are you making an social media announcement?
Not sure. We did with our first but might not this time around. That being said, we don't live near a lot of our friends. Maybe I'll just put it on the note with our Christmas card.
DD #2: May 2020
Baby #3: EDD May 2023; MC October 2022
How did you tell your partner? He was the first text I sent while I was in the Panera trying not to cry happy tears into my soup!
Who will you tell next? We are driving five hours tonight to tell my in-laws in person. Then my new boss when I start my new job Tuesday.
Why are you waiting (or not waiting) to tell? We wanted to tell the in-laws in person because my father in law is really ill and we wanted to brighten their day with more than just a text message. Aside from that....I had already maybe overshared about our IVF journey so there would be no point in not telling people IMO.
How and when are your telling those you work with? Tuesday, my first day on a new job. I'm terrified, but it's an animal dental clinic and we take X-rays for every procedure, so it would be hard to not tell them.
Are you making an social media announcement? I'm not on social media, so no.
We have two kids but I wasn't ready for them to know (secret Spillers!) so I bought a bandana for one of our dogs that says "big sister," since she's the youngest in the house. It took him a minute, but I'm glad I surprised him this time.
Who will you tell next?
That depends on whether hyperemesis plays a role again this time. The plan is family and close friends after my first appt at 9 weeks. If I start getting sick 20 times a day like last time, that date will obviously need to be moved up.
Why are you waiting (or not):
I got so sick of the hundreds of questions and advice from friends and family in my previous pregnancies. I'd love to just have those conversations with my husband for a while. Additionally, after a chemical pregnancy this summer, I'm just not ready to announce until I hear a heartbeat.
How and when are your telling those you work with? Not sure.
Are you making an social media announcement? Sure, but I'm not sure when.