I’ve also never heard of this, and have spent many many years working with children! So do they test you for it at some point? Is this something they often test but just don’t really share with parents!? Thanks for saying something about it!
CMV isn't routinely tested for because most of the population would test positive for it without even knowing they've had it. It's mostly a threat to infants and the immunocompromised. In fact, most blood used for transfusions is positive for it unless they are an infant or special request by the doctor for the severely immunocompromised. I'm really put off that your midwife has made such a big deal out of it that she is scaring people @mamaber2204. While it can be downright terrifying for a small percentage of people, it is not something to change your whole life for to most people. It's more of something to be cautious of when it is baby time, just like any other cold or illness.
@bubsalicious That's certainly good to hear. My midwife said that because the toddler carrying it is usually asymptomatic (or has just a runny nose - when don't they?!), an expectant mom often would have no idea she'd been exposed, which is why you should not eat after, share utensils with, mouth kiss your toddler when you're expecting. But, frankly, if it's that common in the preschool crowd, why wouldn't they test all babies when they're born just to ensure the infant doesn't have it? Seems like a good precaution.
@mamaber2204 if an infant has CMV, they will not be asymptomatic. A great reason to not test every infant is the amount of blood needed to run the test itself. It's not a small amount, so the chances of getting it from a heel stick are pretty slim. That means not only would you be taking a large amount of blood from a newborn to screen for something they most likely don't have, you would be requiring them to have a venipuncture, which is not easy to do on newborns.
Let me ask your opinions...there's a name I love but DH coworker named their daughter it. They're not super close and it was a couple years ago now (maybe 3ish). Would it be tacky if I still used that name? I'm kinda torn. I feel like I would be annoyed if someone I worked with named their kid one of mines names.
@supermom34482 use it and own it! Chances are one of them may get a different job someday anyway and it will be long forgotten. Don’t cheat yourself out of a name you love because of it!
@supermom34482 I am in a similar boat. We have basically decided on Willa and I was hung up for a long time because there's a Willa in DD's prek. They will be together at least another year. But we don't know her parents well and honestly they probably won't end up at the same school after prek so we decided to overlook it.
How popular is the name? I think that would weigh in on my decision.
@duewithpu2 well that's one thing they won't be leaving their jobs until they retire. They're civil servants so we're in it for the long haul. They're been working together for 10 years already so probably another 15 or so. I mean we never hang out with them....I feel like I'm talking myself into this lol
@supermom34482 I say go for it. Dh has cousins with the same name (after their grandma), and it really isn't that weird. I thought it would be, but you begin to associate the name differently on each person. So I definitely don't think it would be too much for coworkers.
@supermom34482 it depends what the name is. If it’s something super unique I probably wouldn’t but if it’s a name people have heard before I would go for it!!
@supermom34482 if you really love it, and the only connection is the husbands are coworkers (the families don't socialize together) I would go for it. If H's coworker says anything I'd just say, we just love the name, imitation is the sincerest form of flattery!
Does anyone else feel like your abdomen is going to burst but you're hungry? I don't know if I'm feeling the sensation of everything stretching but I feel super bloated and my stomach is growling.
@sparkles5275 I totally get this! Usually I need a BM when it happens, but your uterus is growing and pushing your organs out of the way. Stomach is getting pushes a little. Just eat smaller, more frequent meals/snacks or find things that aren't overly heavy
@supermom34482 I think you’re fine to use it. You aren’t close and it’s not like you are also using the same middle name. It’s impossible for everyone to have different names. If this baby had been a girl, odds are high that I would have used the same name that MHs cousin named the daughter last October. We never see them.
Do many of you get a routine ultrasound for a growth scan? I think it’s usually done around 36ish weeks. I didn’t have one with my first pregnancy, and I don’t think I’m having one this pregnancy either. Just seemed like my last ultrasound was the anatomy scan.
@lillywonderland That’s how it seems at my office too. A few of my friends had them, and they didn’t have GD. It was just routine for them. I guess every OB office is different and does things differently.
I think I had a scan at 36 weeks with my first pregnancy, although I cannot completely remember the timing. I feel like they guessed my son’s weight and also noted that he was turned head down, but it’s all kind of foggy when I try to remember the exact details. Not very helpful, I suppose!
@septoctkids My practice does that scan at 36ish weeks. From what I remember, it was just really quick, and like @blitzybee said, just estimated weight and checked positioning.
I only do the a/s. I've had friends encouraged to induce because of big babies and they aren't actually big at delivery. My tiny midwife delivered a 10lb baby so she says not to overthink it. If she thinks there is reason to worry she'll recommend one for other reasons.
I had one last time, but it was because my fundal height was measuring 3 weeks ahead.
The place I used to work, we had a lot more women coming in for growth scans between 34-36 weeks. Where I am now, we generally only do them if the mom is measuring ahead or behind or has some other thing going on like GD or AMA.
@RedBreast35 yes, my understanding is it’s just a quick weight check. I was just curious if a lot of ppl got that. Thanks everyone! Seems mixed but not required.
@calliah makes sense! My fundal height was behind 3 weeks last time and they were going to send me but at my next appointment it was fine so they didn’t.
@septoctkids- our office does not typically do growth scans. However I had GD so I had them every week. I will say that I had a scan on a Thursday that said Baby was going to be close to 10 pounds, however he was born at just over seven six days later so I don’t put a lot of stock into the scan. I also know a friend of mine who is at the same practice is having a scan because her first baby was quite large so they want to check and see if this one is going to be too as to avoid the complication she had with the first.
Me: 30 DH:31
Married 9/2010 TTC 10/2013 RE Help from 10/2014-10/2016 (11 failed IUIs, a corrective surgery, and a donor embryo cycle) 9/2016-transferred two donor embies BFP 9/29/26 EDD June 11
@septoctkids I had a meltdown during my first pregnancy because I felt like I wasn't getting proper care only getting an U/S at 8-12 weeks and one at the AS at 20 weeks. Then everyone in my BMB was basically like "yeaaaahhh... sorry to break the news but thats completely normal..." low and behold I had low amniotic fluid and DS had big kidneys, so I ultimately got more ultrasounds. I think it's silly that women don't have more as part of routine care though, like one at 30 weeks and one at 36 at least. But, this is clearly why I'm not the one in charge of insurance policies and payouts!
@sunshine2417 I totally agree haha. Our office technically only does one informal ultrasound at 10 weeks and then one formal one at 20 weeks. I want more!! Haha love getting a peak at the baby. Lol.
My MFM gives me an additional growth scan at 32 weeks because I have a history of IUGR. I believe unless there is something they need to check or something in your history, the AS is the last one.
Is anyone on anti anxiety or similar medication during this pregnancy? Or was previously and stopped for the pregnancy, or have taken them with a previous pregnancy?
@kiddiesandkitties I came off of my anxiety meds for my first pregnancy and have been off ever since due to breastfeeding and knowing that we would keep trying for more kiddos. Unfortunately, a large part of my anxiety is currently focused on something causing harm to my kids, and since I've had multiple MC's, I've stayed off of them just so it's not one more thing I could try to blame (slightly irrational, I know). Doctors have said many options of them are safe though, and I wish I could get over it and take them because my PPA with DS was also off the charts.
@kiddiesandkitties 🙋🏻♀️ I was on it before getting pregnant with my first, and I went off it completely when we started trying. I chose to go off them then well...because first time mom worries. I did however, go back on it at 37 weeks when baby was fully developed. My doctor recommended going back on it to help with postpartum depression because those with anxiety and/ depression have a higher chance of developing ppd. I have been on it ever since and breastfed for 18 months on it as well. Come this pregnancy I decided to wean my dose way down to 10mg but I am not going off it completely this time. I had severe anxiety and dizziness last pregnancy all related to anxiety. The benefits outweigh for the cons this time for me. I am having a wonderful pregnancy, and my doctor is not concerned at all with me being on a low dose.
@blitzybee had you been on them pre-preg? Did you have any side effects or risk factors
that your doctors weighed? I was on one
(very briefly – less than a few weeks) before finding out I was pregnant
(Lexapro) and felt like they hadn’t started / weren’t doing anything anyway so
I stopped immediately. But I’m starting
to feel like maybe taking nothing is as damaging as the risk of being on one,
and perhaps now that I’m into 2nd tri it’s moderately safer?
@sunshine2417 that’s SO MUCH of my problem. I have this
massive anxiety over something going wrong, to the point that it’s moderately debilitating
at worst, making a significant negative impact on me and my family at best – so
I find myself weighing whether I ought to be on something – and then I can’t
shake the feeling of ‘what if something happens, and then it will OBVIOUSLY be
my fault for taking the meds’. It’s a continuous
circle with no logical resolution.
@septoctkids do you mind my asking what you take? I was only
on 10mg of Lexapro before (tho I didn’t feel it was helping) and I have a friend
IRL who is currently pregnant, due this summer, and on 100mg of Zoloft. I don’t
know how the two compare, though. Did your doctor inform you of possible risks?
I feel like if I’m balancing sanity with, say, (something that is minimally
risky), then I’m probably doing more harm by being a nutbag on nothing. But if I’m balancing it against increased
risks of SIDS or birth defects or stillbirth, I don’t know that my head could
wrap around purposefully increasing those possibilities given my history.
@kiddiesandkitties I can completely understand all of your worries. I was on them pre-pregnancy. My kid is kind of a crazy, wild child, but I think he probably got that from his daddy. He hasn’t experienced any health issues that I’ve been aware of that are a side effect of medications. My question has always been if the baby feels any withdrawal once not having the meds go through his/her system anymore. We got through it all just fine in our family.
You have been through SO much. I know that when I was on them, I felt healthier, and therefore felt my baby would be healthier. I had 1 doctor tell me to get off of them (without any consult of asking why I was in them or how I was doing), and had 2 doctors tell me that the benefit of a healthier mom was stronger than the potential risk it posed to a baby. I know I’m not all that helpful in making a decision. Either way you go, you deserve some TLC/self-care throughout all of this.
Hey everyone. I hate to just drop in with a question randomly. I'm on a business trip so it's been super busy . Yesterday I had sharp pains on the top left side of my bump and left shoulder. That went away but all day today I've had sharp pains on my right side, kind of at belly button level. I looked up round ligament pain and it says that usually goes away in minutes. Maybe i just slept the wrong way but I'm a ftm freaking out away from home. Advice is greatly appreciated. Yes I've been drinking a ton of water. It's 2pm here and the sharp pain has been there on and off for the majority of the day
Re: The Great Question Thread!
How popular is the name? I think that would weigh in on my decision.
Also, take it and own it! You run in different circles!
The place I used to work, we had a lot more women coming in for growth scans between 34-36 weeks. Where I am now, we generally only do them if the mom is measuring ahead or behind or has some other thing going on like GD or AMA.
@calliah makes sense! My fundal height was behind 3 weeks last time and they were going to send me but at my next appointment it was fine so they didn’t.
TTC 10/2013
RE Help from 10/2014-10/2016 (11 failed IUIs, a corrective surgery, and a donor embryo cycle)
9/2016-transferred two donor embies
BFP 9/29/26 EDD June 11
Thanks so much!!
@blitzybee had you been on them pre-preg? Did you have any side effects or risk factors that your doctors weighed? I was on one (very briefly – less than a few weeks) before finding out I was pregnant (Lexapro) and felt like they hadn’t started / weren’t doing anything anyway so I stopped immediately. But I’m starting to feel like maybe taking nothing is as damaging as the risk of being on one, and perhaps now that I’m into 2nd tri it’s moderately safer?
@sunshine2417 that’s SO MUCH of my problem. I have this massive anxiety over something going wrong, to the point that it’s moderately debilitating at worst, making a significant negative impact on me and my family at best – so I find myself weighing whether I ought to be on something – and then I can’t shake the feeling of ‘what if something happens, and then it will OBVIOUSLY be my fault for taking the meds’. It’s a continuous circle with no logical resolution.
@septoctkids do you mind my asking what you take? I was only on 10mg of Lexapro before (tho I didn’t feel it was helping) and I have a friend IRL who is currently pregnant, due this summer, and on 100mg of Zoloft. I don’t know how the two compare, though. Did your doctor inform you of possible risks? I feel like if I’m balancing sanity with, say, (something that is minimally risky), then I’m probably doing more harm by being a nutbag on nothing. But if I’m balancing it against increased risks of SIDS or birth defects or stillbirth, I don’t know that my head could wrap around purposefully increasing those possibilities given my history.
You have been through SO much. I know that when I was on them, I felt healthier, and therefore felt my baby would be healthier. I had 1 doctor tell me to get off of them (without any consult of asking why I was in them or how I was doing), and had 2 doctors tell me that the benefit of a healthier mom was stronger than the potential risk it posed to a baby. I know I’m not all that helpful in making a decision. Either way you go, you deserve some TLC/self-care throughout all of this.
I looked up round ligament pain and it says that usually goes away in minutes. Maybe i just slept the wrong way but I'm a ftm freaking out away from home. Advice is greatly appreciated. Yes I've been drinking a ton of water. It's 2pm here and the sharp pain has been there on and off for the majority of the day