@duewithpu2 not sure if you are still having the peeing problem, but pay attention to it. When I had a UTI, it started as frequent urination and then started to get painful after a day or so. Could also be baby compressing your bladder though. I don’t feel like it would be GD
@nightdreamr13 yes!! They feel like flutters at first! Sometimes it feels like baby is rolling right across my belly. Soon they’ll feel like straight up sucker punches
@cheshyre319 it gets SOOOOO weird... sometimes a little nauseating... and sometimes, you end up fighting with your kid’s butt or their feet when they’re pushing out or kicking your ribs! DH used to lay his head on my belly and DS would kick and push against him. Omg then you reaaaally get all the people who want to touch you too! 😫😫😫
Here's a silly one. What is the 'app' people speak of?! I know it doesn't always work excellently and I generally just use Safari on my phone to open the web page... but I'm still curious. I don't find anything if I look in the app store for TB!
Yep, search for bump and it should come up. I don’t usually have problems with it. It just logs me out every so often. I like it because it gives a random baby fact each day. Like today, baby’s palm is the size of an altoid
Ftm here and very confused about bottles. Any help and advice is greatly appreciated. 1. To warm or not to warm them? How do you warm them at home as well as on the go? I've been told to use the baby water in the gallon jug. Why? 2. How do you clean them and Why? I've heard just hand wash, dish wash, get a sanitizer, and use the microwave. 3. They come in different sizes and shapes.. why? How do I know what my baby will like? I dont...so what do I register for? How long will 4 oz bottles really last or should I just get a few? 4. Will the hospital tell me what kind of formula I need or should I register for some?
@nightdreamr13 1. I started formula at 8weeks and warming bottles was a hassle. I stopped and my son didn’t care so I never warmed one again. Tap water is perfectly fine to use. If you have well water, you may want to ask your doctor. 2. I always cleaned mine in the dishwasher and that was it. 3. I recommend getting bottles that reduce gas. I like Dr Browns. You can try to have a couple brands on hand to see what you like best. I used the 4 oz bottles until DS was about 2 months. I think we had 4 and that seemed to be enough. 4. Similac Advance is a pretty standard default formula (other brands have their version which are the basically same) unless your baby has a bad reaction or a pre determined condition, your doctor will likely start you off with it.
Thanks @duewithpu2 how did you get away with 4 bottles? I thought they took a bottle every 3 to 4 hr as newborns? I'll chat with my Dr about the well water. Thanks So you think it's safe to put 1 thing of formula on the registry? I'm considering just leaving it off all together to avoid the criticism of 'you mean you're not breastfeeding?!?!'
@nightdreamr13 DS was BF until he was 18mo, but we did bottles for daycare.
1. I stopped warming when he was ~12mo so he would start taking regular milk cold. We used the Tommie Tippee bottle warmer. It was pretty cool but we didn’t get too much use out of it since I was fairly successful with BFing.
2. I sterilized the bottles and nipples before first use (boiled for like 5-10mins), then just hand washed them after that. They say if your baby is immunocompromised (aka preemie) you’ll have to sterilize before every use.
3. I never got anything larger than the 4oz bottles (ours held about 5.5oz if you filled it to the top), but DS was EBF. We just tried the free bottle that we got in a couple welcome baby bags (Avent Natural) and DS liked it so we went with it. I have heard of some babies refusing multiple types of bottles before they could one that they liked, so basically just register / buy samples (one or two bottles) until you find something that your LO likes.
4. I have no clue about formula. I think it’s a trial and error kind of thing.
@nightdreamr13 I never bought formula but I signed up and got some samples from a few different companies to have on hand in case my daughter didn't take to breastfeeding. I was lucking and had no problem but it did make me feel better knowing that if something happened that there was some formula in the house. Once I got a good stash of breast milk frozen I ended up donating my formula samples to a local community group.
@nightdreamr13 after each use I just rinsed them out and used a bottle brush with hot water and put them on the drying rack. We generally used the same one all day. Think of it like cups. You wouldn’t get a new cup every time you got a drink.
I highly recommend doing what @kdl89 said about keeping one of the formula samples you get in the mail. Hopefully if you’re set on BF you’ll never need it, but my BF journey ended by desperately busting open one of those samples after hours of screaming any time DS was taken off my breast. The poor kid gobbled down 8oz of it because my milk had all but dried up and I didn’t know he wasn’t getting anything. I can’t imagine if I’d of had to take him screaming like that to the store to get some.
I have been told mixed thing about what water to use. Best advice is to ask your dr. We used bottled with DS and tap with DD.
Sterilize in the dishwasher or you can buy sterilization bags for the mircowave.
Start with 4oz bottles. I would get one or two of a few types to see what baby likes. I have used Avent Classic with both of mine. Same with formula. I wouldn't buy a bunch until you see what works.
1. Never warmed the bottles as he didn't seem to care. SO much easier that way! However, its recommended to use boiling water for formula as it kills any potential cronobacter bacteria which can be found in formula. We just used our purified water. 2. Dishwasher for us, because aint nobody got time for all that. I keep a little plastic container in one side of the sink and bottles get rinsed immediately with hot water then placed in there before going in. I make sure to rinse everything well and wont do bottles with loads of dishes I find possibly contaminated like stuff used on raw meat. 3. If you get sample bags and boxes you'll get a lot of 4 oz bottles, I think I ended up with 6? and used those. Once baby was drinking more than 4oz a go I switched to 8oz bottles and had bought an 8 pack of those. 4. They will not. If theyre "baby friendly" they wont even give you formula. Our hospital gave out samples of similiac and thats what we ended up using when our BF journey ended.
Unfortunately I wasnt unable to breastfeed due to complications. But let's think happy thoughts. I used regular warm tap water and my daughter had no problem with it. We hand washed only because we didn't have enough stuff to fill the dishwasher everytime. As for formula go with whatever makes you comfortable. Most of them have pretty much the same ingredients. We went with Kirkland brand. You get twice as much for half the price of name brands. There is a comparison right on the side.
@nightdreamr13 when I registered with DS a store clerk told me to just register for 4-5 individual bottles (if you don’t get enough sample bottles from places) and then one big “bottle set” so that hopefully you can test out all the individual ones, and if someone buys you the big set, you can return it for the brand that worked! My son would only use Mam bottles and pacifiers, as the longer nippled bottles seemed to be too much for him. This also made sense as I don’t necessarily have the longest/pointiest nipples either so it was more what he was used to.
One more thought I forgot to mention about bottle quantity! They recommend switching to sippy cups at 6 months, so that’s another reason to not go overboard on the amount!
Thanks everyone! Great things to think about. I was thinking I needed 10 4 oz bottles and like 20 of the 8 oz bottles in case I don't get around to washing daily but that's bc I was thinking of using the dishwasher...which i no longer plan to do after reading the responses!
Idk how to, but maybe we should do Another board for registry questions b.c I've got tons! For example, cribs.... We were looking at the ones with the small changer connected to the crib. Is this dangerous though? Couldn't the baby eventually get out of the crib and onto the table?
I feel like there's just so much I don't know :(So grateful for you ladies!
@nightdreamr13 I have heard that the cribs with the changing tables attached make it easier for them to climb out of, which is why we never got one with my daughter.
As far as bottles go, my daughter wasn't picky, she took the Medela bottles, which were the first bottles I gave to her at 2 weeks old from pumping (so DH could have some bonding time with her too and I could ensure she'd start to take bottles for my inevitable return to work). We went through A LOT of bottles, I was always happy to have extras (and I never took away her bottle at 1 like a lot of people do, so maybe that is why I was also grateful for the extras). I never did use the larger ones though, the 5 oz were the biggest ones we ever used. I probably had 12-15 of them? But when I went back to work at 4 months, I left bottles of pumped milk for her each day in our fridge (we had in home care), so I felt we needed that many. For cleaning. when she was a newborn, I boiled them clean each day. After about 6 months I started using the "sanitize" option in the dishwasher and never looked back! Hope that helps!
@nightdreamr13 I agree with the theory that the changing table attached can pose a hazard when they start climbing. Also you’ll be surprised at how often you don’t change them on the changing table especially if your changing table is upstairs.
Thanks guys. We don't really have an area for changing (We were planning to use an older stand up dresser that would be too tall) except the pack n play. The nursery is on the first floor as well as the master bedroom so I think it would get good use. We are open to suggestions on other options....i really don't want to spend another $400 for a separate table. Cpuld the pack n play really work as a full time changing table? I assumed there would be a low weight limit on that portion of the unit but I can only find a weight limit listed online for the actual pack n play part, not each attachment.
Soool happy to have you guys help me learn about all of this!
@nightdreamr13 the pack and play worked well for us for a while until we lowered it to use as a play pen. By that time they’re mobile and you’ll probably be changing them on the floor or wherever you happen to be because they like to squirm!! I definitely would pass on a $400 changing table. We are using a low dresser with a changing pad for our nursery.
Super late to this convo but @nightdreamr13 it looks like you've gotten some fabulous suggestions for bottle/feeding and such!
As for the changing table question, I use the top of DS' dresser to change him, but it's not tall. You can definitely use the pack n play, but it will get more difficult as they get older and more wiggly. If you don't want to get a lower dresser that can double as a changing table (definitely do not spend the money on a separate changing table) then I suggest just changing them on the floor. I don't find it as easy, but I have back issues so that's probably why.
*TW*
Me: 32 │ DH: 35 Married 8/16/13 BFP#1 DS 11/13/16 BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18 BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
@nightdreamr13 we didn't get a dresser so we got a stand alone changing table, but it was around $100 on amazon (and we used the completion discount). For me it was totally worth it to have a dedicated changing spot that didn't make me bend over/sit down etc - especially at first. We put a mobile up over it while he was little and that kept his attention pretty well. At first we kept it in the main room, and then moved it to his room. We still use it. (And really late to the bottle discussion, but I always cleaned them in the dishwasher after the initial sterilization and found that 6 bottles were enough and 8 bottles provided a comfortable cushion - we did switch to the bigger bottles but I can't remember when exactly, maybe around 6 months. If using the dishwasher I'd recommend getting a small parts basket thing - we got the OXO tot one - for the bottle nipples and any other smaller bottle components [some bottles have valves] if your dishwasher doesn't have something like that built in.)
ETA: putting everything in spoiler adding a TW for talk about SIDS.
Question about swaddling. I heard there’s controversy about
it recently. The daycare center we toured actually brought it up. They said
they are not allowed to swaddle at all anymore and that if we want a good
transition to the center that we shouldn’t do it from the start. And here’s
why: when a baby is swaddled it prevents their jerking reflex from waking them
up. It’s now thought that the jerking reflex is a good thing and helps prevent
SIDS. What are your guys’ thoughts?
*TW* TTC history
Me:32 DH:31 Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017 Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal DX: Unexplained 8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN 9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN 11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN 12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst 1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019 10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
@LJMoon6 omg this is all so much to keep up with! DS never tolerated his arms being swaddled so maybe swaddle with the arms out or use a swaddle sack that lets them keep their arms by their head?
@LJMoon6 I think swadding depends on the baby, but it does seem a little dangerous to me (w. Hands in). I would never do it with DS. He got out of every swaddle every time. The blanket would end up in his face. This time I'm only using Velcro swaddles with hands out.
@LJMoon6 I don't know about safety but with DS we made the decision not to swaddle. Honestly I can't remember all the research but we went for it. We felt a little bad on the startle reflex. He's always been an excellent sleeper though so who knows. I may try the Montessori cotton pad thing though. Not sure yet https://www.thekavanaughreport.com/2016/12/montessori-baby-week-1.html?m=1
Swaddling has always been ~controversial~. If you don’t do it right it does become a blanket hazard, baby could bust out of it...or baby could bust out of it anyways. The safer alternative is the sleep sack with Velcro swaddle because baby can’t easily break the Velcro latch (most often they just are able to put their arms up and out). That being said, swaddling with both arms in is ONLY recommended until baby can roll over. Once that happens, no more arms in swaddling. Usually that’s happening around 3-4 months.
SIDS is scary as shit, and you do what you need to to make yourself feel better. I always thought that SIDS was loosely related to suffocation since the things they recommend to reduce it are placing baby on their back (so baby doesn’t re-breathe their exhaled CO2), using a pacifier (because babies who suck&sleep aren’t sleeping as deeply), having a fan in the room (to move the air around) and breastfeeding (since baby won’t sleep as long/deeply supposedly because breastmilk is more easily digested than formula and baby gets hungrier earlier). I dunno about it being linked to the startle reflex, but it could very well be.
Everything can be a hazard or the best thing for a baby. Babies are used to being very squished in the womb, so swaddling will feel natural, but if baby is always trying to bust out of it, well then there’s a great answer in what the baby is communicating! “Love to Dream” swaddles were my favorite. Arms are positioned up, and you can get the kind where the hands can zip off.
Sleeping is going to be controversial, and we all just have to do the best we can. My son was and still is the worst sleeper, and was later diagnosed with 3 (yes 3!) sleep disorders. I got so much shit advice and had to follow my intuition and pretty much quit talking to people about how my kid was sleeping because they would have judged me. If you choose to co-sleep, read about co-sleeping on how to do it safely. Same goes for formula, pacifiers, and on and on. That type of thinking and then researching can go along with all choices in helping us to make informed decisions on how to be safe with our babies. AND, we are all blessed with intuition with our babies-that seemed to be the best tool I had. Moms in Africa raise babies without any cribs, equipment, etc... just years of watching the previous generation and material for carrying the baby on themselves. We all do what we can do😊
ETA: putting everything in spoiler adding a TW for talk about SIDS.
I guess it's not exactly recent. I just looked into it more and it looks like it became illegal for centers to swaddle in Minnesota in 2012. And the research article that prompted this didn't specify how the swaddled baby was sleeping (e.g. on back, side, or belly). After this research article came out more research has been done (or maybe a better look at the data for this article). It looks like the increase risk of SIDS associated with swaddling was only increased when babies were sleeping on their sides and belly. I want to look into it more tomorrow at work where I'll access to more research articles. I never associated SIDS before with suffocation (wouldn't the COD be suffocation then not SIDS?). I always thought SIDS was from the brain not controlling breathing properly? I really have no idea. I'm very naive about this subject.
*TW* TTC history
Me:32 DH:31 Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017 Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal DX: Unexplained 8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN 9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN 11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN 12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst 1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019 10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
@blitzybee Very true. I'd actually recommend all mom's to be research co sleeping. Only because so many mom's end up doing it unplanned once baby arrives. Better to be knowledgeable and not need the info than end up in an unsafe situation.
We used velcro wraps with arms out at first and then Halo sleep sacks.
If you have room, I recommend a cheaper changing table. We got a bundle deal of crib and table and have always used the table for something. Right now it is toy storage in our play room. Not worth $400 though IMO.
You all know my history... as such, I've become pretty familiar with the in's and out's of SIDS.
A healthy mom creates a better scenario in all regards, so I completely agree with @blitzybee that at the end of the day, nearly everything can be a degree of controversial. Whatever you choose to do, do it informed, and do it safely. I've read horror stories of moms who were obsessive about co-sleeping, their babies hardly slept (which means they hardly slept) and a couple weeks in, woke in the morning with baby in their bed, covered in their comforter and blankets, having no idea how they got there or what time etc. Sleep deprivation is a REAL THING and I truly believe it is more dangerous than making educated decisions that work for your family.
'Safe swaddling' only exists to 8 weeks. Arms in or arms out is still considered swaddling by definition. After 8 weeks, it is recommended that baby be transitioned to a sleep sack (or just sleep in pajamas). To my knowledge, most daycare centers don't accept newborns till closer to 12 weeks (?) - so it should allow for a bit of adjustment time before having to send baby to daycare sans swaddle. My kiddos never took to swaddling anyway, but that startle reflex can be a major downer on sleep during the real newborn stage. I will be atleast attempting to swaddle for the first weeks this time around.
'True' SIDS is not related to suffocation. If there were any sign of suffocation, COD would be determined as asphyxia. There are signs and identifiers found during autopsy that would lead to that determination. The rules to get COD labeled as SIDS has become VERY difficult in recent years, which is what has led to the drop in numbers of SIDS cases. In most states, if a baby was sleeping in an 'unsafe sleep environment' - cosleeping, sleeping with a parent, sleeping with a blanket - even if the autopsy shows no sign of asphyxia/suffocation, the COD will be labeled 'undetermined'. The latest research has identified a possible missing 'link' in the brain stem that doesn't remind the baby to breathe. It can happen in minutes, or even seconds. I have known cases where babies were sleeping in a carrier grocery shopping, and I have known cases where baby was awake. If a baby dies with no prior illness, etc. it is law that an autopsy is done, so there aren't any cases that are purposefully excluded, etc. We are working with a program at Children's Hospital (The Roberts Program) that focuses solely on SIDS research.
Re SIDS.... The way I look at it, there has been no definitive "cause" of SIDS yet so there's no way to determine how to prevent it. Sure there are certain things that seem to lessen the risk or just to be safer in general, but until a specific cause is found, all we can do what is recommended i.e. putting them to sleep on their backs etc. IMO.
On the sleeping topic, when have you/should you transition to a crib? Is day 1 acceptable, or should I definitely have a bassinet in my room for X weeks?
@cammie0526 totally up to what you're comfortable with!! I know tons of people who have done crib from day one and it has worked absolutely fabulously for them. For me, I have a hardish time getting baby in/out of the crib (like, balance my whole body teetering on the edge of the crib and manage to lean far enough so as not to throw the baby in) so it's less than ideal for me to do 450x a night in the pitch black when they're still teeny. I plan on using a Halo / bassinet in our room for ~4-6 months and then transitioning. I also have a small house so it's easier to keep baby in my room for a while for everyone else's sake. But if you are comfortable with starting in the crib - totally do it!!
Re: The Great Question Thread!
@duewithpu2 not sure if you are still having the peeing problem, but pay attention to it. When I had a UTI, it started as frequent urination and then started to get painful after a day or so.
Could also be baby compressing your bladder though. I don’t feel like it would be GD
1. To warm or not to warm them? How do you warm them at home as well as on the go? I've been told to use the baby water in the gallon jug. Why?
2. How do you clean them and Why? I've heard just hand wash, dish wash, get a sanitizer, and use the microwave.
3. They come in different sizes and shapes.. why? How do I know what my baby will like? I dont...so what do I register for? How long will 4 oz bottles really last or should I just get a few?
4. Will the hospital tell me what kind of formula I need or should I register for some?
1. I started formula at 8weeks and warming bottles was a hassle. I stopped and my son didn’t care so I never warmed one again. Tap water is perfectly fine to use. If you have well water, you may want to ask your doctor.
2. I always cleaned mine in the dishwasher and that was it.
3. I recommend getting bottles that reduce gas. I like Dr Browns. You can try to have a couple brands on hand to see what you like best. I used the 4 oz bottles until DS was about 2 months. I think we had 4 and that seemed to be enough.
4. Similac Advance is a pretty standard default formula (other brands have their version which are the basically same) unless your baby has a bad reaction or a pre determined condition, your doctor will likely start you off with it.
I'll chat with my Dr about the well water. Thanks
So you think it's safe to put 1 thing of formula on the registry? I'm considering just leaving it off all together to avoid the criticism of 'you mean you're not breastfeeding?!?!'
1. I stopped warming when he was ~12mo so he would start taking regular milk cold. We used the Tommie Tippee bottle warmer. It was pretty cool but we didn’t get too much use out of it since I was fairly successful with BFing.
2. I sterilized the bottles and nipples before first use (boiled for like 5-10mins), then just hand washed them after that. They say if your baby is immunocompromised (aka preemie) you’ll have to sterilize before every use.
3. I never got anything larger than the 4oz bottles (ours held about 5.5oz if you filled it to the top), but DS was EBF. We just tried the free bottle that we got in a couple welcome baby bags (Avent Natural) and DS liked it so we went with it. I have heard of some babies refusing multiple types of bottles before they could one that they liked, so basically just register / buy samples (one or two bottles) until you find something that your LO likes.
4. I have no clue about formula. I think it’s a trial and error kind of thing.
I highly recommend doing what @kdl89 said about keeping one of the formula samples you get in the mail. Hopefully if you’re set on BF you’ll never need it, but my BF journey ended by desperately busting open one of those samples after hours of screaming any time DS was taken off my breast. The poor kid gobbled down 8oz of it because my milk had all but dried up and I didn’t know he wasn’t getting anything. I can’t imagine if I’d of had to take him screaming like that to the store to get some.
I have been told mixed thing about what water to use. Best advice is to ask your dr. We used bottled with DS and tap with DD.
Sterilize in the dishwasher or you can buy sterilization bags for the mircowave.
Start with 4oz bottles. I would get one or two of a few types to see what baby likes. I have used Avent Classic with both of mine. Same with formula. I wouldn't buy a bunch until you see what works.
2. Dishwasher for us, because aint nobody got time for all that. I keep a little plastic container in one side of the sink and bottles get rinsed immediately with hot water then placed in there before going in. I make sure to rinse everything well and wont do bottles with loads of dishes I find possibly contaminated like stuff used on raw meat.
3. If you get sample bags and boxes you'll get a lot of 4 oz bottles, I think I ended up with 6? and used those. Once baby was drinking more than 4oz a go I switched to 8oz bottles and had bought an 8 pack of those.
4. They will not. If theyre "baby friendly" they wont even give you formula. Our hospital gave out samples of similiac and thats what we ended up using when our BF journey ended.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
I was thinking I needed 10 4 oz bottles and like 20 of the 8 oz bottles in case I don't get around to washing daily but that's bc I was thinking of using the dishwasher...which i no longer plan to do after reading the responses!
Idk how to, but maybe we should do Another board for registry questions b.c I've got tons!
For example, cribs....
We were looking at the ones with the small changer connected to the crib. Is this dangerous though? Couldn't the baby eventually get out of the crib and onto the table?
I feel like there's just so much I don't know :(So grateful for you ladies!
As far as bottles go, my daughter wasn't picky, she took the Medela bottles, which were the first bottles I gave to her at 2 weeks old from pumping (so DH could have some bonding time with her too and I could ensure she'd start to take bottles for my inevitable return to work). We went through A LOT of bottles, I was always happy to have extras (and I never took away her bottle at 1 like a lot of people do, so maybe that is why I was also grateful for the extras). I never did use the larger ones though, the 5 oz were the biggest ones we ever used. I probably had 12-15 of them? But when I went back to work at 4 months, I left bottles of pumped milk for her each day in our fridge (we had in home care), so I felt we needed that many. For cleaning. when she was a newborn, I boiled them clean each day. After about 6 months I started using the "sanitize" option in the dishwasher and never looked back! Hope that helps!
Soool happy to have you guys help me learn about all of this!
As for the changing table question, I use the top of DS' dresser to change him, but it's not tall. You can definitely use the pack n play, but it will get more difficult as they get older and more wiggly. If you don't want to get a lower dresser that can double as a changing table (definitely do not spend the money on a separate changing table) then I suggest just changing them on the floor. I don't find it as easy, but I have back issues so that's probably why.
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
ETA: putting everything in spoiler adding a TW for talk about SIDS.
Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017
Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal
DX: Unexplained
8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN
9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst
1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019
10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
TTC #2: 12/2020
2/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
3/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
4/2021: Surprise! Natural BFP! \\ EDD Jan 6th, 2022 \\ Chemical, betas not rising
8/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
9/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
10/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD July 29th, 2022
https://www.thekavanaughreport.com/2016/12/montessori-baby-week-1.html?m=1
SIDS is scary as shit, and you do what you need to to make yourself feel better. I always thought that SIDS was loosely related to suffocation since the things they recommend to reduce it are placing baby on their back (so baby doesn’t re-breathe their exhaled CO2), using a pacifier (because babies who suck&sleep aren’t sleeping as deeply), having a fan in the room (to move the air around) and breastfeeding (since baby won’t sleep as long/deeply supposedly because breastmilk is more easily digested than formula and baby gets hungrier earlier). I dunno about it being linked to the startle reflex, but it could very well be.
Sleeping is going to be controversial, and we all just have to do the best we can. My son was and still is the worst sleeper, and was later diagnosed with 3 (yes 3!) sleep disorders. I got so much shit advice and had to follow my intuition and pretty much quit talking to people about how my kid was sleeping because they would have judged me. If you choose to co-sleep, read about co-sleeping on how to do it safely. Same goes for formula, pacifiers, and on and on. That type of thinking and then researching can go along with all choices in helping us to make informed decisions on how to be safe with our babies. AND, we are all blessed with intuition with our babies-that seemed to be the best tool I had. Moms in Africa raise babies without any cribs, equipment, etc... just years of watching the previous generation and material for carrying the baby on themselves. We all do what we can do😊
I never associated SIDS before with suffocation (wouldn't the COD be suffocation then not SIDS?). I always thought SIDS was from the brain not controlling breathing properly? I really have no idea. I'm very naive about this subject.
Married: 8/2015
TTC #1: 4/2017
Testing: HSG, U/S, BW, and DH's SA all normal
DX: Unexplained
8/2018: Clomid + TI = BFN
9/2018: Clomid + TI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2018: Clomid + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
12/2018: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone \\ Cancelled due to cyst
1/2019: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD Sept 30th, 2019
10/7/2019: Healthy baby boy!
TTC #2: 12/2020
2/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
3/2021: Letrozole + TI = BFN
4/2021: Surprise! Natural BFP! \\ EDD Jan 6th, 2022 \\ Chemical, betas not rising
8/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
9/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
10/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFN
11/2021: Letrozole + IUI + Progesterone = BFP! \\ EDD July 29th, 2022
If you have room, I recommend a cheaper changing table. We got a bundle deal of crib and table and have always used the table for something. Right now it is toy storage in our play room. Not worth $400 though IMO.
A healthy mom creates a better scenario in all regards, so I completely agree with @blitzybee that at the end of the day, nearly everything can be a degree of controversial. Whatever you choose to do, do it informed, and do it safely. I've read horror stories of moms who were obsessive about co-sleeping, their babies hardly slept (which means they hardly slept) and a couple weeks in, woke in the morning with baby in their bed, covered in their comforter and blankets, having no idea how they got there or what time etc. Sleep deprivation is a REAL THING and I truly believe it is more dangerous than making educated decisions that work for your family.
'Safe swaddling' only exists to 8 weeks. Arms in or arms out is still considered swaddling by definition. After 8 weeks, it is recommended that baby be transitioned to a sleep sack (or just sleep in pajamas). To my knowledge, most daycare centers don't accept newborns till closer to 12 weeks (?) - so it should allow for a bit of adjustment time before having to send baby to daycare sans swaddle. My kiddos never took to swaddling anyway, but that startle reflex can be a major downer on sleep during the real newborn stage. I will be atleast attempting to swaddle for the first weeks this time around.
'True' SIDS is not related to suffocation. If there were any sign of suffocation, COD would be determined as asphyxia. There are signs and identifiers found during autopsy that would lead to that determination. The rules to get COD labeled as SIDS has become VERY difficult in recent years, which is what has led to the drop in numbers of SIDS cases. In most states, if a baby was sleeping in an 'unsafe sleep environment' - cosleeping, sleeping with a parent, sleeping with a blanket - even if the autopsy shows no sign of asphyxia/suffocation, the COD will be labeled 'undetermined'. The latest research has identified a possible missing 'link' in the brain stem that doesn't remind the baby to breathe. It can happen in minutes, or even seconds. I have known cases where babies were sleeping in a carrier grocery shopping, and I have known cases where baby was awake. If a baby dies with no prior illness, etc. it is law that an autopsy is done, so there aren't any cases that are purposefully excluded, etc. We are working with a program at Children's Hospital (The Roberts Program) that focuses solely on SIDS research.