@FunkyKey Hope your procedure went well! It's hard coming off of the high of good news and then having to wait forever for the next thing to come. You can only stay in good spirits for so long during this journey. Maybe you can do something fun with friends or family soon. I make sure to connect with friends at least once a week. It really helps!
@Dwmmwd So much on your plate. That's really sweet of you to bring your uke for your mom. Has she been enjoying it? Wish you nothing but enjoyable times with your mom for as long as possible.
@Hopeful_Mom That is hilarious! How exactly did that happen? Was it your SO's car that you don't drive that often? Was it parked with a bunch of others in a garage?
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@Hopeful_mom - I know you're being a great wife saying DH could go w/o you to the wedding but were you hoping he would want to stay home or were you really ok with him going? i find at times I say I'm ok with something as I hope OH will realize on his own what he should be doing.
I do that too sometimes, but I try not to. I try to be really honest and direct with DH.
This time, I really do want him to go. I just also want him to recognize that while he's off, I'm going to be holding down the fort and dealing with yet another aspect of our IF. I don't see why those are mutually exclusive... I guess I just want a little more consideration.
Sorry ladies, enough from me on this. As stressful as it is to deal with, I keep reminding myself, having children is no cake walk. I try to view all these conflicts as opportunities to share our needs with each other, with the aim that we can become better partners and thus better parents.
Pretty sure that is the hardest part of parenting, though - learning how to be more mature, more generous, more forgiving, and then modelling all those qualities to your children, at the same time as establishing clear boundaries and structure. Ugh. I'm exhausted already.
Thanks, everyone, for your thoughts on the spotting! Definitely seems to have been from the pap.
@allycheer00 Oh yeah, Dr. Google has successfully diagnosed me with several different types of cancer, lol. Also meningitis. DH says to please stop googling symptoms when I'm sick because I'm always convinced I have meningitis.
@Hopeful_mom The plan right now is a fresh transfer--next week! I'm sorry your H is not as involved and his travel is a huge conflict. I'm glad you have you sister to help with the trigger; I definitely don't think I could do it on my own, although the nurse demonstrated how in the class. I'm glad you're on to the next cycle! It seems like something ALWAYS has to go wrong, right? Sounds like you made the best of it, but still. So frustrating. Also, I loved your story since I've definitely done something similar before.
Welcome @sammymommy89! I know nothing about the surrogacy route, but I think there's a Third-Party Reproduction board that probably has good support, too. Definitely participate here and there!
@BusinessWife I feel you on the IF burnout. I've definitely had those months of just not caring as much, and I ultimately gave up on forcefeeding DH supplements. I think you will be more motivated when you start stimming--I certainly was because it's a lot of money on the line (although I think you have some insurance coverage, yes?) and having to definitely do something every night was a huge prompt. Don't get too down on yourself. You've built a good base already and sometimes you just need a break.
@funkykey I hope your polypectomy goes well today! I'm really sorry you're having a rough patch, and also that the timing is so horrible with the wedding. Lots and lots of hugs to you. I hope that it goes well and you can move right on to your FET.
@Dwmmwd Have a wonderful time with your parents and especially enjoy the time with your mom. I'm so sorry about her diagnosis. I'm glad you're getting as much time in with her as possible.
@ReesaAnne16 I used to have a "slammer" (one of those kitchy stuffed toys that you throw down and it says something) that said "Not fair!" because I was constantly saying things weren't fair as a child. It may still be at our cottage; I really should have found it when we started this whole process because it would have been perfect now!
Last cycle, when I had had the call from the doctor, they told me I had a growth on my uterus that they thought was a polyp, and that they wanted to remove it. It looked really small, so they wanted to do a hysteroscopy and hoped to scrape the polyp off with the camera - thus my calling it a polypectomy. (All of this you may have heard before.) They said there was a chance, once they looked at it, that they wouldn't be able to deal with it, and that I'd need a referral and to have a more major procedure done, thus my worrying about it.
Anyway, so today I go in for the hysteroscopy, they take one look - it's not a polyp at all but a submucosal fibroid, likely. I'll need to have it removed, and I might have to wait a couple of months for it to be done.
So no FET for me for a while yet.
But maybe all my worrying wasn't for naught - I don't seem to be taking this as hard as I took the cysts, or when they told me there would be no fresh transfer. Maybe the other night's panic and the hope of our 4 embryos is helping?
Ugh. The doctor who did the hysteroscopy told me to feel free to drink as much as needed - no pregnancy any time soon. I won't go too crazy, but I thought that was sweet of her to say.
Even though no FET will happen for me for a few months, I may stay on this board...
@funkykey I've had two surgeries to remove fibroids, the downtime is annoying, but the recovery for both was mostly painless and without complications. I was super disappointed to find out I had to do it so I feel you. Please stick around!!! You've been so awesome to "hang" with
Ugh - such a bummer @funkykey. The waiting game is maddening. But if it is any consolation, I had a fibroid removed and I was good to go in about a month or so, so the ute heals quickly, my RE said! I actually now have a small one (1 cm) that a doctor who I had a consult with found recently, so I will need to have that come out prior to any transfer, but since I'm doing banking, I figure I'll just leave it alone for a bit. Lucky you got those 4 embie waiting in the wings!
Me: 41; DH: 45 Both married for the first time in our 40s; went straight to IVF after multiple fibroid surgeries (2/17) ER: #1: agonist/antagonist protocol: 19 eggs; 8 mature; 13 fertilized; 1 7-day blast (6BA = abnormal/non-viable) (4/17) ER: #2: same protocol but stimmed an extra 2 days: 16 eggs; 10 mature (5 more matured in lab); 13 fertilized; 2 6-day blasts (5AA & 6BA) & 2 7-day blasts (6BA & 5BB): only 1 Day 6 6BA tested normal! FET on 7/10/17 Beta on 7/21/17: Negative:( (8/17) ER #3: 9 eggs; 6 mature; 3 fertilized; 1 7-day blast (6BA = abnormal/non-viable) Developed severe complications (abdominal bleeding) following egg retrieval which required hospitalization, transfusion & emergency surgery. Done with IVF.
@funkykey. Oh, dear... I am so very sorry to hear this. One more bump in the road, one more thing to wait through, is the last thing any of us wants to hear. I'm glad though that your embies are helping keep your spirits and hopes up!!! Please do stay, friend!!! ❤❤❤ (((hugs))
@funkykey I agree my supposed polyps were also fibroids and I had them removed and was ready for Stims a month and a half later. Sorry about your delay. Maybe take your doctor up on the suggestion and have a cocktail.
TTC 4 years. 7 failed IUI's with either Clomid, Femara and/or Trigger Shots. Started IVF journey in February 2017. Polyps removed in May. 1st IVF Transfer September 26th. BFP. Expected due date 6/14/18. Baby boy born 5/25/18 at 6 lb 9 oz. My bundle of joy.
@sammymommy89 Forgive me for asking, but I'm also curious to know where you plan on going for gestational surrogacy. I thought a few states in the US are the most "advanced" when it comes to legislation (like Ca, but also the most expensive brrr), and only Ukraine has surrogacy laws as well, but it's a faraway land with some risky background I think? I also need to take the GS route for my next frozen embryos and I am kind of stressed out and stuck with what to do.
@funkykey - Oh no! But at least they see it and can remove it. Although my FET is scheduled in a couple months, I'm going to stick around here too!
My TTC journey:
Me and DH: 30-35 Unexplained infertility TTC #1 since 2015 11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal) FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@funkykey Booooo! I'm so sorry about the fibroid! That's so frustrating--I'm impressed you're taking it so well, but you would be perfectly within your right to freak out a bit if you wanted to. It's another one of those "it's not fair!" things that really is just not fair. Please stick around here while you're waiting; I love having you in this community.
@funkykey I was thinking about you all day wondering how it went. ugh!!! i'm so sorry. That freakin sux. And to get that news on your own without your OH, even stinkier. But it sounds like from what everyone else is saying that hopefully it won't be too big of a deal? I've never been in that boat, so I don't have many words of advice, except DRINK. So unfair. But, I have to say that when you said there was bad news and that they found something else, I was really bracing myself that it was cancer or something and I was a little panicked. So, I'm just glad it's not that...? Sorry, I mean that in the most supportive and positive and not insensitive way. Hopefully it came out that way.
AFM-managed to find out an update today from my genetics co. which is that they had an order to just bank the embies not test them. They claim my clinic got it wrong. Anyway, dealing with my nurse and hopefully getting it worked out. Luckily they did write me back today, so that was cool. And on Monday i had emailed my nurse to ask about timing bc I don't get how it will work since the turnaround will be 15 days. And today I get a response, she's like, oh start taking the birth control on day 2 or 3 of your cycle. And no one has mentioned BCP to me or prescribed it, so I'm like, uh, ok, can you prescribe that then? I'm in Chicago, you'll need to call it in here. All of these are very small things, but it's really weird bc my nurse is usually so on it, it never takes her 4 days to respond to me, and certainly never had an issue she forgot to prescribe something or talk to me about something. Anyway, just little things that will hopefully be worked out tomorrow. Also, had I not been all crazy and neurotic about all of this, it could have been weeks of me just waiting for my results. I mean, I'm paying like 30k here, can't you all just get your shit together?
Oh wow, just got an email that BCP was called in for me. It's currently in SF but I'm sure that's easily changed. Okay, feeling better already.
TTC #1
me- 37, DH- 38
Married 6.28.14, started TTC right away BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016 ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5. ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6 9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd. FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18 Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
@Dwmmwd - Wow that's ridiculous about your clinic not being on their game here, especially if they need to prescribe something and it's not done the same day. I feel the same way too about paying so much out of pocket. You are expecting them to process everything as smoothly as possible. There is no excuse to drop the ball when it's $30k!
My TTC journey:
Me and DH: 30-35 Unexplained infertility TTC #1 since 2015 11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal) FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@dragonette505 - fibroids are the worst. Several women in my family have had hysterectomies because of the size of their fibroids, once they were done having children... but clearly, that's not an option for me right now. I was kind of hoping that that invasive fibroid gene had skipped me, but I guess not. I knew I had one, but I guess it grew? Oiy!
@angelbea - ha! Well, maybe we can be myomectomy twins!! Hoping your little one doesn't get any bigger!
@Holls214 - my preferred drink of choice these days is tequila. In fact, I am enjoying a variation on the paloma right now.
@helloworld9 - I hope you send us photos of beautiful things you see in Europe, if you're going to stick around. Or at least delicious things you eat that you cannot eat pregnant. I swear, if I were in France right now, I would be stuffing myself with unpasteurized cheese, despite any of H's warnings that "it's just not safe". Safe, schmafe!
@Bababatty - OMG I am getting so excited that you might be PUPO soon!!! This is nerve wracking! Grow, follies, grow! Glad you will still have me on the thread - otherwise, I would be stalking your pregnancy!! xoxo
@Dwmmwd - But, I have to say that when you said there was bad news and that they found something else, I was really bracing myself that it was cancer or something and I was a little panicked. So, I'm just glad it's not that...?
Oh God! Looking at the post now, my spacing/paragraph breaks were a little on the "dramatic" side. My dad is like the world's biggest drama queen - which is fun but also tiresome - and I'd be lying if I said I'd not inherited a small part of that streak. Ugh. Whoops! I probably should have announced that a little bit differently - I typed it up so fast, and didn't even bother to check myself!
So excited that you've had some correspondence with the genetics co and hoping all goes well!
Also, had I not been all crazy and neurotic about all of this, it could have been weeks of me just waiting for my results. I mean, I'm paying like 30k here, can't you all just get your shit together?
I feel like I'm being crazy and neurotic all the time, but I think that's just because so many people are so, um, "relaxed" about sh*t. Sometimes, it really pays to be paranoid... I would say that's almost a personal motto, for me.
AFM, more to share: after my hysteroscopy was over, I texted DH, who was still on the plane but called me as soon as he landed. Then I went and met my sister in the waiting room, and when she asked me how it went, I shook my head, and then she started to cry - and the two of us actually both started crying in elevator, even though other people stepped in. She actually cried more than I did!
She was like: "I'm so sorry. It's not supposed to be this hard!" Which made me feel like yes, I'm actually still somewhat sane. It also made me feel like @Hopeful_mom - you may be on to something, sisters rock.
Also, I must say, there is something very cool about seeing the inside of your own uterus, including where the fallopian tubes enter it. Very, very cool - even if there is a fibroid there.
sammymommy89 theres a apart of me that wishes i used a surrogate the first time i got a normal embaby so that it couldve been cooking this whole time while i tried for more normal embabies. How crazy is it that i think someone else will have a better shot at carrying my baby then me. Its a very scary thought indeed. I pray my body with be able to do it...but ever since my MC , i do worry about that too!
allycheer00 it was my brothers car and my SIL parked it AND he recently got a new leased car, so when I saw the older car, same color I just assumed that was it AND there was a sticker on the back of the car that is the same as his kids...even though I don't remember him being into bumper stickers or anything like that. Ready for the real blonde moment (NO OFFENSE TO ANY BLONDES OUT THERE!!!)) they have the lil stickers of the family on the back and I stop and look at this and say hey...thats not everyone in the family did they leave someone out and a dog. I'm actually thinking about this....recalling I've never noticed stickers on his car prior.
funkykey your thoughts are spot on for sure, regarding DH! I find myself reminding OH all the time of the lil extras I have to do in this process. Just going to acupuncture, he'll just be like where are you and why? Its a bunch of crap...thats great but anything to help the cause!! The call I had with the Dr today, he should've been available but wasn't so again I have to take note and go over it with hi,. You think he even has a clue what endometriosis is? I barely do. And my favorite is whenever he has a hard day with his kids he likes to remind me that its not easy and its just going to be so hard having kids. Perfect just what i want to here...motherhood is not a cake walk, got it. As my niece ran her little scooter into my leg today, didn't tickle I can tell you that!
No need to go anywhere please!! I find it interesting on girls that do a cycle and then peace out...usually i'm always first at ER and yet one of the lasts to post on the thread as the others move on...
As for the bad news, I'm confused did they do the procedure or once they got in there stopped? Certainly doesn't sound fun to say the least. Its very hard as we only wanted to be on baby #2 lets say. We all use the saying I wanted to be pregnant yesterday!! It totally sux and i'm sorry! Glad you're young and have that on your side I feel like i got benched today as well from my consultation with my immune Dr...more on that below. I just feel like if I go with his thoughts then I'm pushing everything down again. OH and I too thought the say as Dwmmwd where i screamed NO, and my OH is like "what happened?" I swear OH is totally blocking the bump in my sleep. I know its "bad news" BUT lets hope it will be a simple fix!
I'm glad your sis was there, not all woman but I do find many woman can empathize that this isn't suppose to be so hard. My sister cries with me, she hates to see me struggle like this!
helloworld9 can we all just stay here till we get pregnant
liljoy hoping you ad your bean are still trucking along....you should be in the home stretch!
Dwmmwd This whole process is such a mind f*&k, pardon my french. I had the opposite happen to me, they sent my babies for testing when they were suppose to went till after i banked them. The news was not good so it sucked a lil more to get it as i was still stemming for the next cycle BUT I was better off knowing as we went now that its over. Sucks that we have to stay on top of it all and keep advocating for yourselves. I think my place is great but this is a business and its so easy to fall through the cracks! Glad you're on top of it and i hope great news is on the way!!
AFM: A quick recap...ever since my MC Im still searching for the WHAT HAPPENED! my acupuncturist asked to see my blood work results from after. She saw them and suggested I also get the NK cell text (natural killer cell) I asked my RE about she basically said thats immunology testing. They dont do it and she doesn't think its necessary. I keep pressing the issue and she recommends someone I can reach out to. SO that bring me to my consultation with dr. braverman (immunology dr) today and i just have so many more questions. He thinks i could have a silent endometriosis issue...which could be problematic. Its all a guessing game BUT it would also mean to push everything back about 3 months. The blood work alone takes 6 weeks to do. i'm very torn AND also pissed that it took so long to get the appointment in the first place, 3 weeks ago I could've gotten the blood work done and still be on the path i'm at now UGH!!!!! He can't do the blood work while I have all these meds in my system...I literally just starting stemming WTH!!! You have to have faith in your RE and all my tests have shown no endo, but my mom has hashimotos which is an immune thing so he thinks i could be a carry of the gene which could be an issue...really. That could be the reason for my MC, so its hard to not really look into it....ugh now even more to think about. Lastly it'll cost me about another 6k and I might need a laparoscopy done...which also means more delay to a transfer. He suggested I stop stemming as endo can hurt your egg quality BUT its my choice. SO I can't say I'm feeling all that great today just trying to read and wrap my head around it. Happy to hear your thoughts...whether your endo knowledgeable or not!
angelbea so I was all set to just move forward with everything and now I'm second guessing everything again. Why does everything have to make us over think everything. Why can't i just go to the dr, do what i'm told and have my baby. nope, have to here all my different options to see whats next. To do the testing or not to do the testing!!
History of TTC in spoiler box
TTC since 2014 Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30 7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle RE thought I would get at least 10. IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
@Hopeful_Mom I'm sorry this new stuff came and hit you like a huge wave. Hoping none of them end up applying to you. Let me know what you find about endo and egg quality. My RE knows I have it but we obviously still went through with IVF. I was thinking I was going to have to have a lap done but they haven't mentioned it yet. Now, I'm really interested to see how many normal embryos I get, if any.
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@funkykey I'm so sorry to hear there is yet another obstacle to overcome for you. I'm glad your sister was empathetic, it's so hard to find people who are sometimes.
Me 34 DH 36 Married since July 2010 MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
TTC #1 since June 2015 Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved. Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature 5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP! May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019 July 2019 - FET - BFN Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
@dwmmwd I'm not sure how things like that happen. This is what these people do all day erry day. Get it together! They have to know this process is already hard and long enough. Grrr!
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@Dwmmwd Ugh! I would have had a minor/major hissy fit about (a) NOT testing the embies!?! and (b) Oh I need a prescription and it wasnt called in!?! Maybe its the redhead in me, but these little things are why i meditate! lol Your calmness impresses me! @funkykey I dont really know about the ladies in past generations, but both my sis and I have them... though it could be environmental Ive always been so healthy so it was shocking to know they were just a-growin and a-growin in there without my knowledge. But... being totally honest, I had little to no pain from these surgeries and Legit even walked my dog the afternoon after. ps..yes! I have pics of my ute and i think its kinda cool too! lol @Hopeful_mom I like the idea of an "until we get pregnant" group Its hard making new friends on here all the time. Not that it isnt nice, but you know when people start to understand you and know when youre joking or being a dramz kween or like really down and needing support and then everyone goes away and you have to do that all over again its like the awful icing on top of the crummy IF cake. Ugh with the immune testing. Were you planning on doing a fresh transfer?
Well, just as the embryologist said, we got our PGS test results back really quickly. I about peed my pants when I heard the RE's voice. He never calls. Two of the 4 are normal!! They're the same sex so I declined to know since we don't have a choice. We're going to go with one retrieval cycle and see if at least one of the two stick. Now just waiting for my period to start so we can get this show on the road.
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
TTC 4 years. 7 failed IUI's with either Clomid, Femara and/or Trigger Shots. Started IVF journey in February 2017. Polyps removed in May. 1st IVF Transfer September 26th. BFP. Expected due date 6/14/18. Baby boy born 5/25/18 at 6 lb 9 oz. My bundle of joy.
Hi all, just laying here on the couch recovering from my ER this morning. I was super nervous because my ute flips out at even the slightest inconvenience, but really no cramping to speak of. We got 9 good eggs--I'm somewhat disappointed since I had 19 follices, although I'd been warned some would be empty and others not mature. But I know I should be grateful and I really am! Maybe surprised is a better word than disappointed. The RE did say 9 was very respectable, so I am happy about that. Here's hoping for some good news on fertilization tomorrow!
@allycheer00 omg!! 2 normals. Thats awesome. Im so excited for you. I would assume your period should be here today or tomorrow. Bc you triggered 2 weeks ago today right? Like me. Mine started yesterday afternoon. So should be soon. I cant believe its all about to be happeneing now. Ha I act like this is for me. im really pulling for you.
@Bababatty congrats. 9 is good. I know everyone wants more but lots of good chances in there. Fx for tom. Report.
Thanks all for your support. I actually came on last night to bitch and moan and then read @funkykey update and was like get over yourself dina, other people have real obstacles. You had to wait a couple of extra days. But I appreciate your support and that being annoyed was legit. I knew after the last cycle that things were not always done right. This is actually the first time my clinic has messed up so thats pretty good bc ive heard some horror stories about other clinics. Plus it was fixed quickly and all is in motion. A mere $7600 just charged to cc. Good times. Anyway, off to pick up my bcp.
TTC #1
me- 37, DH- 38
Married 6.28.14, started TTC right away BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016 ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5. ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6 9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd. FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18 Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
P.s. yes lets just keep this little group going. You guys have honestly made the last month so much less stressful. I briefly browsed the august fet when i thought i might be in that boat but i was like, ah all new people. Its too overwhelming.
TTC #1
me- 37, DH- 38
Married 6.28.14, started TTC right away BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016 ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5. ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6 9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd. FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18 Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
@Bababatty 9 is great! I also shared that feeling as well as I had 26 and they only got 12 during ER. Hoping your recovery goes well. Get some rest!
TTC 4 years. 7 failed IUI's with either Clomid, Femara and/or Trigger Shots. Started IVF journey in February 2017. Polyps removed in May. 1st IVF Transfer September 26th. BFP. Expected due date 6/14/18. Baby boy born 5/25/18 at 6 lb 9 oz. My bundle of joy.
@bababatty9 is a good number! Fingers crossed that you get a great report in the morning! And remember, they can fertilize late. One of my normals was a late-bloomer.
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@dwmmwd You are right! A couple days isn't that bad. It's just so hard when you're in the midst of this loooong timeline. A day feels like an eternity to me. I'm thinking AF will show tomorrow. I'm really not looking forward to it because I've heard that the one after ER is worse than normal. Has that been true for you? I'm just as excited for YOU! Do they do both the PGS and PGD at the same time?
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@Hopeful_mom - As for the bad news, I'm confused did they do the procedure or once they got in there stopped?
Yes, exactly. They were like: "It's minor, come in for this, and we'll deal with it." And then I go in and they look and they're like: "This is worse than we thought. We're not equipt for this. We'll have to refer you to someone else, it may take a few months."
ps. you made me laugh with your "no offense to any blondes" all caps. Hahaha. I'm blonde, and was not offended at all.
I'm sorry about the news from the immunologist, but I'm glad you are following up. The delay sucks though, and more $$ too? Ugh. Good luck with your decision, I'm sure you will do what's right for you.
@allycheer00 - great news!!! Can't wait for you to get this show on the road!
A day feels like an eternity to me too. Maybe because I wake up thinking about IF and I go to bed thinking about IF, and in between I think about all the actual tasks I need to do and phone calls I need to make. Gah.
@Bababatty - 9 eggs?! Great news!!! Keeping FX and sending you lots of good vibes these next few days - hoping you end up with a nice number of blastocysts!!
@Dwmmwd - we put everything on our CC. We have gotten so many points from all of this... it is at least one silver lining! Our CC points from IVF! LOL. I haven't even checked the points catalogue to see if I can use them to get a crib or something.
Bababatty we always want more as this is such a tough process!! Excited you have 9 hoing they all fertilize and you get a great report tomorrow!! I believe you said you're doing a fresh transfer...just look how much closer you are now to being PUPO
@allycheer00 - i cheered when i read ur post, 2 is fantastic congrats!!! You are brave girl good for you! I had to know I couldn't help myself...but that was also after the loss when I found after after the fact. Just think how much closer u are to AF coming woohoo!! I love one of the late bloomers is a normie...everything is just so up in the air in this process you truly never know. One cycle i had 6 - and if you put their grandes in order of excellent to fair starting from 1 - 6, embaby 5 was a normie beating out the other 2 excellent embabies...you just never know! Still haven't figured out my end game yet and need to look into endo more. Some people have major issues and egg quality issues for sure! Glad you got your normies!
@Dwmmwd - yep those payments are fun - doing back to back cycles my cc declined oopsie We all go through every emotion, its allowed...even if the rest of the world doesn't get it.
funkykey ugh thats sounds awful, totally sucks...I wouldve been in tears for sure! and DH is a way, hoping you were able to relax and enjoy the rest of your weekend. I hate that there are just so many different things we have to go through. I'm still not sure what i'm doing yet. I'm continuing on with this cycle and hopefully will get good results...its really what to do after that. I'm so glad I didn't offend you!! I will say I never intentionally try to offend but I think some do take offense to things when they should not! Kind of why you want boards you're on to keep on so you don't have to overly explain your sarcasm I too hate that all i do is think of IF, when there are so many other things that need my attention yet its all of this that consumes me!!
dragonette505 I wish I had enough normal embryos to do a fresh transfer...hopefully I'll get some normies out of this group and then do an FET. I was really hoping to do this in Sept already. Its crazy as I thought I was going to get to an FET in June but kept on with IVF cycles so as you can see i'm just so ready to get that bfp!!
AFM: I'm still going to stick with this current cycle just unsure of what i should do next. I wish it didn't all have to take so much time. And I'm trying to figure out how to bring up to my current RE about having silent endo and what that can mean...in other news finally got the correct smaller needles for my injections this evening so hopefully i wont be screaming as loud...its hard giving yourself the injections but when you really have to force it in, OUCH!
History of TTC in spoiler box
TTC since 2014 Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30 7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle RE thought I would get at least 10. IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
@funkykey - I will definitely eat all the stuffs in Europe, hehe! And I hear you about the CC points. I actually opened up a new CC with better points accrual because I knew I was going to spend it on IVF. We also dipped into our HSAs and that helped some.
@Hopeful_mom - Everyone here is such a supportive group of women. Of course I will stay until the hard fought end! We just all want it so badly. Silent endo, that's the first I've heard of it. That sucks about having to do more tests and more waiting. But hopefully this current cycle will be your last and you will get a bunch more embryos from it!
@allycheer00 - Congrats!! Are you planning to transfer 1 or 2? My AF after ER was actually quite normal, for my AF standards. It might differ per person.
@Bababatty - 9 is great! Hoping a ton make it to blast.
My TTC journey:
Me and DH: 30-35 Unexplained infertility TTC #1 since 2015 11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal) FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@allycheer00 no my period has been pretty normal and last time too. I often get this really awful pain for one hour where I'm screaming in agony and no position makes it better and sometimes makes me throw up and hyperventilate during my period, and I did get that on day 1 after my last ER. Fx that I won't get it this month. I didn't get it on the off cycle. I have not gotten that in the past two days and as of tonight I'll be on the pill and I'm assuming my period should end pretty quickly, so I'm really really hoping I don't get it. But I've gotten the pain other months, not just after stimming. Which is why I think I have endo. That's really my only symptom, aside from infertility. Oh and I have a large endometrial chocolate cyst that's been there a long time. And maybe blood clots. I get pretty bad clots and I think I only started getting those after my loss last year. Anyway, all that's to say, no my periods after ER have been fine aside from that. Oh and yeah, we are doing both pgs and pgd, so we're just hoping we have one or two that clear both hurdles. We should get it all at once in about two weeks.
@hopeful_mom I feel as in the dark as you do about the endo thing. My understanding of it is that it creates a toxic environment to fertilization but from what I've heard, implantation shouldn't be affected. But I feel very confused and have no idea if it's connected to my loss. So that's why IVF is supposed to work for endo, since you fertilize outside the body. We took like a month break to meet with an endo specialist (which it took me like 2 years to get referred to so I get your frustration there) who was like yeah, you probably endometriosis. You don't get really painful periods that make you throw up otherwise. And she was like if you want to do the laporoscopy you can. Or you could do IVF. She also said, when you're done having kids you could just have everything removed (bc I'll need to at least have my ovaries out bc of BRCA-1 anyway, so might as well just take the uterus too). Then our RE was like why would you do surgery now? Just do IVF and do the surgery later. So we decided to try IVF. On certain days I feel very skeptical that this will all work with my history, but I just try to stay positive. It sounds like silent endo just means having it and no pain so you don't know you have it?
Also Ready for the real blonde moment (NO OFFENSE TO ANY BLONDES OUT THERE!!!)) they have the lil stickers of the family on the back and I stop and look at this and say hey...thats not everyone in the family did they leave someone out and a dog
I was cracking up reading this bc that is totally something I would do. Hmm, that's weird, why didn't they put their other kid on there? hahahaha
I saw my brother today and was talking about how his 6 year old is like CRAZY moody and she's having insane temper tantrums (never had them as a 2 year old I guess), like hiding under the couch and just losing her shit over nothing. Anyway, I was like, wow parenting sounds awful. Why am I spending 30k on this again? I'm sure it's rewarding too, but, yeah...
TTC #1
me- 37, DH- 38
Married 6.28.14, started TTC right away BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016 ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5. ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6 9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd. FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18 Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
Dwmmwd thats very interesting thanks for sharing. I like the fact that they say its ok to do after. I don't really hit the markers from endo but who knows. I'm confused as I did have a polyp/fibroid removed 3 yrs ago now wouldn't they have seen something then. i think thats my big hang up right now...its not like doctors haven't been in there so why wouldn't they have seen it. I always say IVF is just a roller coaster of emotions. I first thought this would work right away when i got started, didn't realize that first month they just do testing etc. And then the days when I went through IVF #3 and finally got my first ever bfp it was magical and then disaster strikes and you become more skeptical then ever. I try to stay positive as this process truly works for so many and I want to be part of that club, we have to be! I really just want to move forward and not have to do all this extra testing and take time away ugh!!!
@allycheer00 I wanted to add about AF. I have read many complain how painful AF is after the ER and I have to say that its not any worse then my regular ones. Granted I live on midol or pamprin the first 2 days and then its fine. I feel like ever since I started with all these meds my AF actually hasn't been as painful or heavy as odd as that may sound. Again I think this is one of those things that is different for everyone each time i might add. One ER i was in pain for days during stemming...probably cause i had a few extra follies growing but still its just amazing how each experience is different.
History of TTC in spoiler box
TTC since 2014 Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30 7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle RE thought I would get at least 10. IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP with TWINS // MC both at almost 10wks IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!! IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!! IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
@dwmmwd What was that huge charge for?? The testing? @Hopeful_Mom Thank you for your constant support. My heart is telling me that you need some to move forward with this cycle with no doubts. You've been through a lot and I feel like the potential disappointment is holding you back. Don't you have 5 normals? That's a lot. I don't know much but IMO focusing so much on why the babies didn't make it might do more harm than good. Sometimes there is no scientific reason. So many prayers to you! @helloworld9 I'll keep the details of my situation out of this thread but my RE recommends transferring 1 embryo. He will do another transfer for free as a compromise!! That's why I'm really excited about having 2. @Hopeful_Mom@Dwmmwd I was on the depo shot from 2000 to 2013. I'm positive it kept my endo at bay until 2014. Endo can absolutely show up quickly and ruin everything. I didn't know I had it until this last May. My RE is pressing forward so surely it's not a stop sign.
Me:35 DH:37 Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
@Dwmmwd - I feel the same way too when there are crying babies on the airplane or at restaurants. It's like why am I paying so much money and trying SO HARD for this? And then you hear the constant complaints from new parents about lack of sleep and the added stress. It's tough to reconcile these feelings with infertility.
@allycheer00 - That's an amazing deal! I wish my clinic had that haha. There is a shared risk program where if your first cycle does not result in a live birth, the second cycle is discounted by half.
@Hopeful_mom - You've been through so so much. I am rooting for you to get to the other side! Stay positive!! IVF will work one way or another. I've read a study that shows that if you are persistent, IVF will eventually be in your favor!
My TTC journey:
Me and DH: 30-35 Unexplained infertility TTC #1 since 2015 11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal) FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@Hopeful_mom@Dwmmwd - I keep chuckling about the stickers on the car. LOL. "Huh, they forgot a kid."
@Dwmmwd - WHAT? Omg, your period sounds terrible - throwing up and hyperventilating and the large chocolate cyst. That sounds awful! I'd be a little skeptical too.
@allycheer00 - my AF after ER wasn't worse than normal at all. It was totally fine.
I keep thinking about baby names. I saw a friend last night, and she was asking about our TTC struggles, and talking to her I realized (yet again) how much harder it's been for us than for other people. She was shocked that in addition to IVF, there'd be more - fibroid removals or cyst draining or polyp removals or whatever else. She didn't even know fibroids existed. And here, it's like: "Oh yeah, I've had that too." Like, it's never just IVF you know - it's IVF and all these other complications that need to be addressed.
So it got me thinking - is there a baby name that means "curse breaker"? Or a baby name that means "new dawn" or "bringer of light"? I've spent far too much time this morning reading up on different names. Couldn't find one that means he/she who "breaks the curse". There are lots for "light" and "blessing" and "gift from heaven", though.
@allycheer00 My RE is big on one at a time also and it does seem like since theyre all frozen anyway why not do 1 and then a second round if needed. The transfer is the cheap part of all this. But free? That's awesome. I think you are right to a certain extent. Some things just aren't explainable, or at least the medical community hasnt gotten there yet. And sometimes crappy shit just happens. After going to a perinatal loss group twice I learned about all too many things that can happen in pregnancy. But i have to remind myself it's only a small segment of the population that goes through this. So like you said for the most part im assuming my loss was just a freak thing. And i actually know someone at my work who had exactly the same thing as me and then went on to have a healthy baby. So I have to believe that will be my story too. I still wonder but try to tell myself not to think about it. The huge charge was for the testing. They charge per embryo plus i had to pay for direct mutation. No idea what that is but they say I need it.
**TMI** Well after i stated that my period was no big deal i had some insanely heavy bleeding last night. Bled through a super tampon and my shorts in like an hour and when i took out my tampon I had huge clots. And i kind of freaked out and called my husband. I think it was just reminiscent of the loss and triggered me. Anyway, seems fine now.
TTC #1
me- 37, DH- 38
Married 6.28.14, started TTC right away BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016 ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5. ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6 9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd. FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18 Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
@funkykey - The only name I can probably come up with is from Game of Thrones if you count Daenerys for like "breaker of chains" or Khaleesi. But those are really out there names haha.
My TTC journey:
Me and DH: 30-35 Unexplained infertility TTC #1 since 2015 11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal) FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@helloworld9 - I am a huge GoT fan... but not that huge! LOL. I have considered "John" like Jon Snow, even though I'm secretly convinced his real name is Jaeharys.
Re: Anyone doing IVF in July/August?
@FunkyKey Hope your procedure went well! It's hard coming off of the high of good news and then having to wait forever for the next thing to come. You can only stay in good spirits for so long during this journey. Maybe you can do something fun with friends or family soon. I make sure to connect with friends at least once a week. It really helps!
@Dwmmwd So much on your plate. That's really sweet of you to bring your uke for your mom. Has she been enjoying it? Wish you nothing but enjoyable times with your mom for as long as possible.
@Hopeful_Mom That is hilarious! How exactly did that happen? Was it your SO's car that you don't drive that often? Was it parked with a bunch of others in a garage?
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
I do that too sometimes, but I try not to. I try to be really honest and direct with DH.
This time, I really do want him to go. I just also want him to recognize that while he's off, I'm going to be holding down the fort and dealing with yet another aspect of our IF. I don't see why those are mutually exclusive... I guess I just want a little more consideration.
Sorry ladies, enough from me on this. As stressful as it is to deal with, I keep reminding myself, having children is no cake walk. I try to view all these conflicts as opportunities to share our needs with each other, with the aim that we can become better partners and thus better parents.
Pretty sure that is the hardest part of parenting, though - learning how to be more mature, more generous, more forgiving, and then modelling all those qualities to your children, at the same time as establishing clear boundaries and structure. Ugh. I'm exhausted already.
Last cycle, when I had had the call from the doctor, they told me I had a growth on my uterus that they thought was a polyp, and that they wanted to remove it. It looked really small, so they wanted to do a hysteroscopy and hoped to scrape the polyp off with the camera - thus my calling it a polypectomy. (All of this you may have heard before.) They said there was a chance, once they looked at it, that they wouldn't be able to deal with it, and that I'd need a referral and to have a more major procedure done, thus my worrying about it.
Anyway, so today I go in for the hysteroscopy, they take one look - it's not a polyp at all but a submucosal fibroid, likely. I'll need to have it removed, and I might have to wait a couple of months for it to be done.
So no FET for me for a while yet.
But maybe all my worrying wasn't for naught - I don't seem to be taking this as hard as I took the cysts, or when they told me there would be no fresh transfer. Maybe the other night's panic and the hope of our 4 embryos is helping?
Ugh. The doctor who did the hysteroscopy told me to feel free to drink as much as needed - no pregnancy any time soon. I won't go too crazy, but I thought that was sweet of her to say.
Even though no FET will happen for me for a few months, I may stay on this board...
Both married for the first time in our 40s; went straight to IVF after multiple fibroid surgeries
(2/17) ER: #1: agonist/antagonist protocol: 19 eggs; 8 mature; 13 fertilized; 1 7-day blast (6BA = abnormal/non-viable)
(4/17) ER: #2: same protocol but stimmed an extra 2 days: 16 eggs; 10 mature (5 more matured in lab); 13 fertilized; 2 6-day blasts (5AA & 6BA) & 2 7-day blasts (6BA & 5BB): only 1 Day 6 6BA tested normal!
FET on 7/10/17
Beta on 7/21/17: Negative:(
(8/17) ER #3: 9 eggs; 6 mature; 3 fertilized; 1 7-day blast (6BA = abnormal/non-viable)
Developed severe complications (abdominal bleeding) following egg retrieval which required hospitalization, transfusion & emergency surgery. Done with IVF.
I also need to take the GS route for my next frozen embryos and I am kind of stressed out and stuck with what to do.
Unexplained infertility
TTC #1 since 2015
11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC
IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
AFM-managed to find out an update today from my genetics co. which is that they had an order to just bank the embies not test them. They claim my clinic got it wrong. Anyway, dealing with my nurse and hopefully getting it worked out. Luckily they did write me back today, so that was cool. And on Monday i had emailed my nurse to ask about timing bc I don't get how it will work since the turnaround will be 15 days. And today I get a response, she's like, oh start taking the birth control on day 2 or 3 of your cycle. And no one has mentioned BCP to me or prescribed it, so I'm like, uh, ok, can you prescribe that then? I'm in Chicago, you'll need to call it in here. All of these are very small things, but it's really weird bc my nurse is usually so on it, it never takes her 4 days to respond to me, and certainly never had an issue she forgot to prescribe something or talk to me about something. Anyway, just little things that will hopefully be worked out tomorrow. Also, had I not been all crazy and neurotic about all of this, it could have been weeks of me just waiting for my results. I mean, I'm paying like 30k here, can't you all just get your shit together?
Oh wow, just got an email that BCP was called in for me. It's currently in SF but I'm sure that's easily changed. Okay, feeling better already.
BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016
ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5.
ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6
9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd.
FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN
FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18
Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
Unexplained infertility
TTC #1 since 2015
11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC
IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@dragonette505 - fibroids are the worst. Several women in my family have had hysterectomies because of the size of their fibroids, once they were done having children... but clearly, that's not an option for me right now. I was kind of hoping that that invasive fibroid gene had skipped me, but I guess not.
@angelbea - ha! Well, maybe we can be myomectomy twins!! Hoping your little one doesn't get any bigger!
@BusinessWife - thank you!
@Holls214 - my preferred drink of choice these days is tequila. In fact, I am enjoying a variation on the paloma right now.
@helloworld9 - I hope you send us photos of beautiful things you see in Europe, if you're going to stick around. Or at least delicious things you eat that you cannot eat pregnant. I swear, if I were in France right now, I would be stuffing myself with unpasteurized cheese, despite any of H's warnings that "it's just not safe". Safe, schmafe!
@Bababatty - OMG I am getting so excited that you might be PUPO soon!!! This is nerve wracking! Grow, follies, grow! Glad you will still have me on the thread - otherwise, I would be stalking your pregnancy!!
@Dwmmwd - But, I have to say that when you said there was bad news and that they found something else, I was really bracing myself that it was cancer or something and I was a little panicked. So, I'm just glad it's not that...?
Oh God! Looking at the post now, my spacing/paragraph breaks were a little on the "dramatic" side. My dad is like the world's biggest drama queen - which is fun but also tiresome - and I'd be lying if I said I'd not inherited a small part of that streak. Ugh. Whoops! I probably should have announced that a little bit differently - I typed it up so fast, and didn't even bother to check myself!
So excited that you've had some correspondence with the genetics co and hoping all goes well!
Also, had I not been all crazy and neurotic about all of this, it could have been weeks of me just waiting for my results. I mean, I'm paying like 30k here, can't you all just get your shit together?
I feel like I'm being crazy and neurotic all the time, but I think that's just because so many people are so, um, "relaxed" about sh*t. Sometimes, it really pays to be paranoid... I would say that's almost a personal motto, for me.
AFM, more to share: after my hysteroscopy was over, I texted DH, who was still on the plane but called me as soon as he landed. Then I went and met my sister in the waiting room, and when she asked me how it went, I shook my head, and then she started to cry - and the two of us actually both started crying in elevator, even though other people stepped in. She actually cried more than I did!
She was like: "I'm so sorry. It's not supposed to be this hard!" Which made me feel like yes, I'm actually still somewhat sane. It also made me feel like @Hopeful_mom - you may be on to something, sisters rock.
Also, I must say, there is something very cool about seeing the inside of your own uterus, including where the fallopian tubes enter it. Very, very cool - even if there is a fibroid there.
allycheer00 it was my brothers car and my SIL parked it AND he recently got a new leased car, so when I saw the older car, same color I just assumed that was it AND there was a sticker on the back of the car that is the same as his kids...even though I don't remember him being into bumper stickers or anything like that. Ready for the real blonde moment (NO OFFENSE TO ANY BLONDES OUT THERE!!!)) they have the lil stickers of the family on the back and I stop and look at this and say hey...thats not everyone in the family did they leave someone out and a dog. I'm actually thinking about this....recalling I've never noticed stickers on his car prior.
funkykey your thoughts are spot on for sure, regarding DH! I find myself reminding OH all the time of the lil extras I have to do in this process. Just going to acupuncture, he'll just be like where are you and why? Its a bunch of crap...thats great but anything to help the cause!! The call I had with the Dr today, he should've been available but wasn't so again I have to take note and go over it with hi,. You think he even has a clue what endometriosis is? I barely do. And my favorite is whenever he has a hard day with his kids he likes to remind me that its not easy and its just going to be so hard having kids. Perfect just what i want to here...motherhood is not a cake walk, got it. As my niece ran her little scooter into my leg today, didn't tickle I can tell you that!
No need to go anywhere please!! I find it interesting on girls that do a cycle and then peace out...usually i'm always first at ER and yet one of the lasts to post on the thread as the others move on...
As for the bad news, I'm confused did they do the procedure or once they got in there stopped? Certainly doesn't sound fun to say the least. Its very hard as we only wanted to be on baby #2 lets say. We all use the saying I wanted to be pregnant yesterday!! It totally sux and i'm sorry! Glad you're young and have that on your side
I'm glad your sis was there, not all woman but I do find many woman can empathize that this isn't suppose to be so hard. My sister cries with me, she hates to see me struggle like this!
helloworld9 can we all just stay here till we get pregnant
liljoy hoping you ad your bean are still trucking along....you should be in the home stretch!
Dwmmwd This whole process is such a mind f*&k, pardon my french. I had the opposite happen to me, they sent my babies for testing when they were suppose to went till after i banked them. The news was not good so it sucked a lil more to get it as i was still stemming for the next cycle BUT I was better off knowing as we went now that its over. Sucks that we have to stay on top of it all and keep advocating for yourselves. I think my place is great but this is a business and its so easy to fall through the cracks! Glad you're on top of it and i hope great news is on the way!!
AFM: A quick recap...ever since my MC Im still searching for the WHAT HAPPENED! my acupuncturist asked to see my blood work results from after. She saw them and suggested I also get the NK cell text (natural killer cell) I asked my RE about she basically said thats immunology testing. They dont do it and she doesn't think its necessary. I keep pressing the issue and she recommends someone I can reach out to. SO that bring me to my consultation with dr. braverman (immunology dr) today and i just have so many more questions. He thinks i could have a silent endometriosis issue...which could be problematic. Its all a guessing game BUT it would also mean to push everything back about 3 months. The blood work alone takes 6 weeks to do. i'm very torn AND also pissed that it took so long to get the appointment in the first place, 3 weeks ago I could've gotten the blood work done and still be on the path i'm at now UGH!!!!! He can't do the blood work while I have all these meds in my system...I literally just starting stemming WTH!!! You have to have faith in your RE and all my tests have shown no endo, but my mom has hashimotos which is an immune thing so he thinks i could be a carry of the gene which could be an issue...really. That could be the reason for my MC, so its hard to not really look into it....ugh now even more to think about. Lastly it'll cost me about another 6k and I might need a laparoscopy done...which also means more delay to a transfer. He suggested I stop stemming as endo can hurt your egg quality BUT its my choice. SO I can't say I'm feeling all that great today just trying to read and wrap my head around it. Happy to hear your thoughts...whether your endo knowledgeable or not!
angelbea so I was all set to just move forward with everything and now I'm second guessing everything again. Why does everything have to make us over think everything. Why can't i just go to the dr, do what i'm told and have my baby. nope, have to here all my different options to see whats next. To do the testing or not to do the testing!!
Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN
IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle
IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP
IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal
IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!!
IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!!
IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
MFI (High DNA Fragmentation) & Mild endometriosis
Aug 2016 - May 2017 6 IUI's with letrozole - BFN
April 2017 - laparoscopy to remove mild endo
June 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU - Cancelled early ovulation, no eggs retrieved.
Aug/Sept 2017 - Mini IVF letrozole 12.5mg, Gonal-F 75IU, cetrotide - 13 eggs retrieved, 11 mature
5 eggs ICSI'd 6 eggs frozen - 1 day 5 blast transfered, 2 expanded blast frozen - BFP!
May 2018 - Baby girl born - Our Joy
TTC #2 since July 2019
July 2019 - FET - BFN
Jan 2020 - FET - canceled due to family health issues
Mar 2020 - FET - low beta - chemical pregnancy
July 2020 - ICSI'd remaining 6 eggs - 3 fertilized - 2 survived to early blast stage, transfered both - Chemical Pregnancy
@dwmmwd I'm not sure how things like that happen. This is what these people do all day erry day. Get it together! They have to know this process is already hard and long enough. Grrr!
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
@funkykey I dont really know about the ladies in past generations, but both my sis and I have them... though it could be environmental
@Hopeful_mom I like the idea of an "until we get pregnant" group
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
Back with responses to the posts above later.
@Bababatty congrats. 9 is good. I know everyone wants more but lots of good chances in there. Fx for tom. Report.
Thanks all for your support. I actually came on last night to bitch and moan and then read @funkykey update and was like get over yourself dina, other people have real obstacles. You had to wait a couple of extra days. But I appreciate your support and that being annoyed was legit. I knew after the last cycle that things were not always done right. This is actually the first time my clinic has messed up so thats pretty good bc ive heard some horror stories about other clinics. Plus it was fixed quickly and all is in motion. A mere $7600 just charged to cc. Good times. Anyway, off to pick up my bcp.
BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016
ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5.
ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6
9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd.
FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN
FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18
Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016
ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5.
ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6
9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd.
FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN
FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18
Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
Yes, exactly. They were like: "It's minor, come in for this, and we'll deal with it." And then I go in and they look and they're like: "This is worse than we thought. We're not equipt for this. We'll have to refer you to someone else, it may take a few months."
ps. you made me laugh with your "no offense to any blondes" all caps. Hahaha. I'm blonde, and was not offended at all.
I'm sorry about the news from the immunologist, but I'm glad you are following up. The delay sucks though, and more $$ too? Ugh. Good luck with your decision, I'm sure you will do what's right for you.
@allycheer00 - great news!!! Can't wait for you to get this show on the road!
A day feels like an eternity to me too. Maybe because I wake up thinking about IF and I go to bed thinking about IF, and in between I think about all the actual tasks I need to do and phone calls I need to make. Gah.
@Bababatty - 9 eggs?! Great news!!! Keeping FX and sending you lots of good vibes these next few days - hoping you end up with a nice number of blastocysts!!
@Dwmmwd - we put everything on our CC. We have gotten so many points from all of this... it is at least one silver lining! Our CC points from IVF! LOL. I haven't even checked the points catalogue to see if I can use them to get a crib or something.
@allycheer00 - i cheered when i read ur post, 2 is fantastic congrats!!! You are brave girl good for you! I had to know I couldn't help myself...but that was also after the loss when I found after after the fact. Just think how much closer u are to AF coming woohoo!! I love one of the late bloomers is a normie...everything is just so up in the air in this process you truly never know. One cycle i had 6 - and if you put their grandes in order of excellent to fair starting from 1 - 6, embaby 5 was a normie beating out the other 2 excellent embabies...you just never know! Still haven't figured out my end game yet and need to look into endo more. Some people have major issues and egg quality issues for sure! Glad you got your normies!
@Dwmmwd - yep those payments are fun - doing back to back cycles my cc declined oopsie
funkykey ugh thats sounds awful, totally sucks...I wouldve been in tears for sure! and DH is a way, hoping you were able to relax and enjoy the rest of your weekend. I hate that there are just so many different things we have to go through. I'm still not sure what i'm doing yet. I'm continuing on with this cycle and hopefully will get good results...its really what to do after that.
I'm so glad I didn't offend you!! I will say I never intentionally try to offend but I think some do take offense to things when they should not! Kind of why you want boards you're on to keep on so you don't have to overly explain your sarcasm
I too hate that all i do is think of IF, when there are so many other things that need my attention yet its all of this that consumes me!!
dragonette505 I wish I had enough normal embryos to do a fresh transfer...hopefully I'll get some normies out of this group and then do an FET. I was really hoping to do this in Sept already. Its crazy as I thought I was going to get to an FET in June but kept on with IVF cycles so as you can see i'm just so ready to get that bfp!!
AFM: I'm still going to stick with this current cycle just unsure of what i should do next. I wish it didn't all have to take so much time. And I'm trying to figure out how to bring up to my current RE about having silent endo and what that can mean...in other news finally got the correct smaller needles for my injections this evening so hopefully i wont be screaming as loud...its hard giving yourself the injections but when you really have to force it in, OUCH!
Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN
IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle
IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP
IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal
IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!!
IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!!
IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
Unexplained infertility
TTC #1 since 2015
11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC
IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
Oh and yeah, we are doing both pgs and pgd, so we're just hoping we have one or two that clear both hurdles. We should get it all at once in about two weeks.
@hopeful_mom I feel as in the dark as you do about the endo thing. My understanding of it is that it creates a toxic environment to fertilization but from what I've heard, implantation shouldn't be affected. But I feel very confused and have no idea if it's connected to my loss. So that's why IVF is supposed to work for endo, since you fertilize outside the body. We took like a month break to meet with an endo specialist (which it took me like 2 years to get referred to so I get your frustration there) who was like yeah, you probably endometriosis. You don't get really painful periods that make you throw up otherwise. And she was like if you want to do the laporoscopy you can. Or you could do IVF. She also said, when you're done having kids you could just have everything removed (bc I'll need to at least have my ovaries out bc of BRCA-1 anyway, so might as well just take the uterus too). Then our RE was like why would you do surgery now? Just do IVF and do the surgery later. So we decided to try IVF. On certain days I feel very skeptical that this will all work with my history, but I just try to stay positive. It sounds like silent endo just means having it and no pain so you don't know you have it?
Also Ready for the real blonde moment (NO OFFENSE TO ANY BLONDES OUT THERE!!!)) they have the lil stickers of the family on the back and I stop and look at this and say hey...thats not everyone in the family did they leave someone out and a dog
I was cracking up reading this bc that is totally something I would do. Hmm, that's weird, why didn't they put their other kid on there? hahahaha
I saw my brother today and was talking about how his 6 year old is like CRAZY moody and she's having insane temper tantrums (never had them as a 2 year old I guess), like hiding under the couch and just losing her shit over nothing. Anyway, I was like, wow parenting sounds awful. Why am I spending 30k on this again? I'm sure it's rewarding too, but, yeah...
BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016
ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5.
ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6
9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd.
FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN
FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18
Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
I really just want to move forward and not have to do all this extra testing and take time away ugh!!!
@allycheer00 I wanted to add about AF. I have read many complain how painful AF is after the ER and I have to say that its not any worse then my regular ones. Granted I live on midol or pamprin the first 2 days and then its fine. I feel like ever since I started with all these meds my AF actually hasn't been as painful or heavy as odd as that may sound. Again I think this is one of those things that is different for everyone each time i might add. One ER i was in pain for days during stemming...probably cause i had a few extra follies growing but still its just amazing how each experience is different.
Unexplained Infertility - but I am 40...Low AMH .30
7 - IUI (50mg-150mg Clomid) Feb - August 2016 all BFN
IVF#1 August 2016 (Antagonist protocol 4/5 eggs) Cancelled cycle
IVF#2 Sept 2016 (microdose luporn pro - disappearing follies, ONLY ONE, convert to IUI) BFN
IVF#3 November 2016 (4 ER, 3 F, 3DT)-BFP
IVF#4 March 2017 //EPP (10 ER (1 wonky so 9 ER) 7F, 3B (5AB, (2)5BB) PGS tested- ALL abnormal
IVF#5 April 2017 // EPP (7 ER, 7F yes! 6B) 2/5 day 4/6 day - 2 PGS normal! yes!!
IVF#6 May 2017 // Antagonist didn't have time for Estrogen Priming...(4 ER, 3 F, 3B) (5AB, (2) 5BB) 2 PGS normal, yes!!
IVF#7 June 2017 // EPP praying this is it and then on to an FET!
@Hopeful_Mom Thank you for your constant support. My heart is telling me that you need some to move forward with this cycle with no doubts. You've been through a lot and I feel like the potential disappointment is holding you back. Don't you have 5 normals? That's a lot. I don't know much but IMO focusing so much on why the babies didn't make it might do more harm than good. Sometimes there is no scientific reason. So many prayers to you!
@helloworld9 I'll keep the details of my situation out of this thread but my RE recommends transferring 1 embryo. He will do another transfer for free as a compromise!! That's why I'm really excited about having 2.
@Hopeful_Mom @Dwmmwd I was on the depo shot from 2000 to 2013. I'm positive it kept my endo at bay until 2014. Endo can absolutely show up quickly and ruin everything. I didn't know I had it until this last May. My RE is pressing forward so surely it's not a stop sign.
Me:35 DH:37
Married 09/2013
*TW* TTC #2 since June 2016 *END TW*
Endometriosis
March 2017- IUI#1- Clomid - BFN
April 2017 - IUI #2 - Clomid, Ovidrel - BFN
May 2017 - IUI #3 - Clomid- cancelled cycle
July 2017- IVF #1-Microdose Lupron protocol, Gonal-F, Menopur, HCG trigger- 12 mature eggs, 9 fertilized, 4 frozen- 2 PGS normal!!
August 2017- FET #1
Unexplained infertility
TTC #1 since 2015
11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC
IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!
@Dwmmwd - WHAT? Omg, your period sounds terrible - throwing up and hyperventilating and the large chocolate cyst. That sounds awful! I'd be a little skeptical too.
@allycheer00 - my AF after ER wasn't worse than normal at all. It was totally fine.
I keep thinking about baby names. I saw a friend last night, and she was asking about our TTC struggles, and talking to her I realized (yet again) how much harder it's been for us than for other people. She was shocked that in addition to IVF, there'd be more - fibroid removals or cyst draining or polyp removals or whatever else. She didn't even know fibroids existed. And here, it's like: "Oh yeah, I've had that too." Like, it's never just IVF you know - it's IVF and all these other complications that need to be addressed.
So it got me thinking - is there a baby name that means "curse breaker"? Or a baby name that means "new dawn" or "bringer of light"? I've spent far too much time this morning reading up on different names. Couldn't find one that means he/she who "breaks the curse". There are lots for "light" and "blessing" and "gift from heaven", though.
I think you are right to a certain extent. Some things just aren't explainable, or at least the medical community hasnt gotten there yet. And sometimes crappy shit just happens. After going to a perinatal loss group twice I learned about all too many things that can happen in pregnancy. But i have to remind myself it's only a small segment of the population that goes through this. So like you said for the most part im assuming my loss was just a freak thing. And i actually know someone at my work who had exactly the same thing as me and then went on to have a healthy baby. So I have to believe that will be my story too. I still wonder but try to tell myself not to think about it. The huge charge was for the testing. They charge per embryo plus i had to pay for direct mutation. No idea what that is but they say I need it.
**TMI**
Well after i stated that my period was no big deal i had some insanely heavy bleeding last night. Bled through a super tampon and my shorts in like an hour and when i took out my tampon I had huge clots. And i kind of freaked out and called my husband. I think it was just reminiscent of the loss and triggered me. Anyway, seems fine now.
BFP Nov 2015, PPROM Feb 2016
ER #1 May 2017, 15 retrieved, 10 fertilized, 3 day 5.
ER#2 July 2017, 22 retrieved, 13 fertilized, 6 day 5/6
9 embryos tested for pgs and pgd.
FET #1 9.29.17- 1 embryo-BFN
FET#2 12.19.17- I embryo-BFP 1/1/18! Happy New Year to me! EDD 9/6/18
Baby boy born 9.11.18- the love of my life!
Unexplained infertility
TTC #1 since 2015
11/2015 - BFP! 12/2015 - MC
IVF #1 July 2017 freeze all (20 eggs, 15 mature, 10 fert, 6 blasts, 4 PGS normal)
FET #1 TBD Surprise BFP 9/2017 while waiting for FET... hoping for the best!