Questions for STMs 6/28 — The Bump
January 2018 Moms

Questions for STMs 6/28

Last week we decided to make the STM+ Check-in biweekly due to the number of various check-ins. I'll be posting a thread where FTMs (or other STMs) can ask questions to STMs in the group on alternating weeks.


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KatieElcrizz13schazeGraceUponGrace09darkrose88CANTW82BMOMMudge85caeilievalor
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Re: Questions for STMs 6/28

  • KatieElKatieEl
    Seventh Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Photogenic
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    edited June 2017
    @missblaze wasn't able to check in last week, but this is such a great idea!

    edited: spelling
    DS1: Nov 2013
    DS2: Jan 2016
    DS3: Dec 2017
    Baby 4 on the way!
    crizz13Ready4thePartyGraceUponGrace09
  • Soooooooooo I will probably get laughed at about this but Im 12 weeks right now. Where is my baby? I tried googling it but I couldnt really understand. Like between my belly button and pubic bone? Are babies by 12 weeks pretty centered? With your first baby could you feel where it was at this early?
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  • @livingoffpbjs They have so much room to move at this point that I would find my dude on the right side most often but they can move around to either side. I'm a bigger gal, so I'd say this was the case for while for me.

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies
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  • @livingoffpbjs I'm a FTM but I definitely feel a little lump toward my right side right between my pubic bone (especially when laying down!). I'm 11w3d
  • I dont feel anything :( I tried feeling around while laying down :'( Man Im clueless, I didnt know they were floating around in there hahahaha

    They just feel like a lump? 
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  • @livingoffpbjs I'm not sure you would be able to feel anything at this point. Baby is really small and not really "hard" at this point (if that makes sense). Anything you'd be feeling would probably just be your uterus lol. I'm 12+4 today and both times they've used a Doppler at the office it's taken a few minutes because baby was "hiding."

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies!


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    EDD: 1/6/2018
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  • schazeschaze
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    ^^^ baby is only at the most a couple inches big right now and not really hard. I would say I couldn't really tell where DD was until maybe beginning of 3rd tri? I'd feel her kick every once in awhile starting at 18 weeks, but she still had a lot of room to move around so I couldn't tell where she settled-unless she was on my bladder!
    crizz13CANTW82BMOM
  • @burnsmommy27  well.... you just ruined sex for me lol I would get wayyyy weirded out lol 

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    kelk5
  • I second what a lot of other PP's posters have said. I felt like I couldn't "find" DD until well after 20 weeks. You'll feel you belly harden up way before you can actually find the baby. And even then, you're like, "Is that the head? Or the butt? Or an elbow?"
    Jan18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies

    **TW**
    BFP #1: 12/1/14 said goodbye 1/2/15
    BFP #2: 5/5/15
    EDD: 1/15/16
    Wren Marie born 1/7/16
    BFP #3 4/26/17
    EDD: 12/30/17
    EmilyLove25livingoffpbjsschazeJuliaGoolia719
  • @livingoffpbjs, for a first pregnancy it's pretty likely that your uterus isn't even above your pelvic bone. The tiny, squishy, doesn't be even have a skeletal system yet baby is swimming around in that space, somewhere. 
    DD1 4.14.10
    DD2 8.22.13
    MMC 1.4.17 at 16w
    Expecting #3, EDD 1.29.18

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    livingoffpbjscrizz13
  • @livingoffpbjs Like everyone else: I didn’t feel anything with DD until 18 weeks and that is SO normal! You wouldn’t be able to feel the actually baby now but you can probably feel how your uterus is harder (and larger) ever so slightly. Now I can tell (from a little feel and when I use the Doppler) that this LO resides mostly on my left side… and it (ETA: HE) totally is LOW. I mean ~4-5 inches below my belly button and about an inch above my pubic line. Hope that helps… 

    *TW*

    DD1 EDD 9/29/2015, Born 9/24/2015

    DS1 EDD 1/3/2018, Born 12/26/2017

    BFP #3 3/21/2019, EDD 11/29/2019, MMC/D&C 5/7/2019

    BFP #4 6/28/2019, EDD 3/12/2020 

    livingoffpbjsJuliaGoolia719
  • This is pretty random but I think appropriate based on the title of this thread? Does anyone have suggestions on curbing thumb sucking for a soon to be 4 year old..... who (or whom) just started sucking their thumb like 2 months ago?  He never did it as a baby (bummer) but now out of nowhere, it's all day long. I am considering buying that stuff you brush on that tastes bad, but not sure if it's safe or effective. 
  • @trudytudy Definitely appropriate for this thread! I wish I had some advice or experience for you, but I don't. I know people who have had success with what you described, but hopefully some other STMs will have other ideas!

    I use Hypnobabies! http://www.hypnobabies-store.com/link.cgi?affiliateID=472

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies!


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  • lmmjdlmmjd
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    @trudytudy My DD has always been a thumbsucker, so it may be different with your LO, but I tried the stuff you're talking about (it's the same stuff they tell nail biters to paint their nails with). My DD just looked at her thumb and stuck it right back in her mouth.
    trudytudy
  • @trudytudy

    I'm a SLP and deal with thumb sucking some, and unfortunately have a thumb sucker myself. We don't normally start addressing it until 3-4 because that is when the child can understand. We will start by telling the older children why it's bad (they will typically get more than we think)! 
    1. It can change the shape of your mouth.
    2. It can make it harder to say your sounds. (Lisps)
    3. It can be dirty.

    Make sure he is drinking from straw cup or open cup only, no spouts.

    Some therapists offer verbal reminders for parents:
    -that's yucky
    -you're a big boy now
    -hands down
    I have mixed feelings about this technique and gauge it based on parenting styles. 

    Providing oral fidgets or "chewlrey" is an option. They have a ton of Disney style ones on Amazon.  When he wants to suck his thumb, he can bite on his necklace instead.

    If you've tried everything and nothing has worked, you can look up to see if there is an orofacialmyologist in your area to evaluate! 


     
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    trudytudy
  • @Dani0329 oh thank you for that info! I'm going to look into the chewlry option for sure. Thankfully he has excellent speech. He even will correct me if he thinks I'm saying something wrong, he will say "mommy, look at my face, it's (whatever the word is). It's adorable. He picked that up when I was correcting him from saying "lightning" instead of "lightning". I have told him that babies suck their thumbs and that he might mess up his teeth but it seems to be one heck of a habit. My 2nd has a major paci attachment. We have gotten her down to only having it in bed but I am convinced it has already messed up her speech. She is super lisp-y and doesn't make many "S" sounds. Although she isn't even 2 for another 2 months. I'm hoping we can improve just by practice. She talks really well and relatively clear, except for the lack of "s" sounds. Eeek! We are a mess!  Also my 2nd bit the tip off of her binki today, so maybe we'll be getting rid of them sooner than later. 
  • @livingoffpbjs Ditto to the other STMs, baby has a ton of room in there right now to move around. I couldn't feel DD from the outside until way later on when she liked to kick me in the ribcage. Ugh!


    I have a STM+ question. DD is in daycare full time during the school year and will be in their preschool program when LO arrives. I'm conflicted about having her stay home with me while I'm on 
    maternity leave. I definitely want her to still go a couple times a week at least, but we'd save a ton of money if I kept her home. What do others think?
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  • @crizz13 good question. I will probably have DD still going but not full time. I had very severe PPD and I think the stress of 2 constantly will not be great for me mentally 
    crizz13
  • So I got my genetic screening results in today and they were positive for Down's Syndrome. My doctor has referred me to a specialist and he told me not to be worried as it could be a false positive. Anyone else have a false positive on a genetic screening test? I'm just looking for some hope. 
    *********************************** TW *****************************************
    BFP #1 Dec 2015 - CP Dec 2015 
    BFP #2 Jan 2016 - MC March 2016 
    BFP #3 May 2017 - Down Syndrome dx @ 12 wks - MC August 2016 

    BFP #4 November 2017 

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  • @aimsforyou2014 no experience here, but sending you positive vibes. 
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  • @trudytudy If you can figure out why your son is sucking (comfort?anxiety?attention?sensory input?), then you can find a replacement thing that he can do that's more appropriate. Taking away the thumb sucking and offering no alternative usually doesn't work so well. So the jewelry that's meant for sucking is a good idea, or maybe some other fidget for his hands. When you see him sucking, offer the alternative thing instead. 
  • @trudytudy
    That's awesome! DD started thumb sucking in the womb. She will be 3 in October so we are going to start a gentle elimination process too! No speech problems yet, but she does have a high arch. 

    Sounds like Ike you are on the right track with number 2! I always say first confine to bed and car seat. Sounds she is still very young and right on track! I wouldn't worry about a lisp-y /s/ at her age!  ;)

    @aimsforyou2014
    I will be thinking of you, from what I understand the there is a high false positive rate with the test. 

     
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  • @aimsforyou2014 I did not have those screenings the reason being that both my MW and OB suggested that false positives happen more than they liked. Sorry I don't have any data on that. I will say that I went for my Anatomy scan for my second and had the wind taken out of my sails when the flagged her for two soft markers for a genetic issue. One of the markers was an indicator of Down syndrome, the other was a more serious trisomy. I cries my eyes out wondering if my baby would be ok. I went to a MFM for a level 2 scan and they couldn't find any issues. In my experience, I had a very unnecessary scare. My baby turned out to be very healthy with no issues. My advice is try to stay calm, not that it's easy, and ask as many questions as you need to your providers. Best wishes for your little one! 
    aimsforyou2014mindaa
  • @aimsforyou2014 what screening test was it? I think some may have more false positives than others. I will be thinking of you.
    DS1: Nov 2013
    DS2: Jan 2016
    DS3: Dec 2017
    Baby 4 on the way!
  • Thinking of you, @aimsforyou2014.
    Jan18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies

    **TW**
    BFP #1: 12/1/14 said goodbye 1/2/15
    BFP #2: 5/5/15
    EDD: 1/15/16
    Wren Marie born 1/7/16
    BFP #3 4/26/17
    EDD: 12/30/17
  • Sending prayers your way @aimsforyou2014
  • schazeschaze
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
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    @aimsforyou2014 thinking of you  <3
  • @aimsforyou2014 thinking of you girl. Try to not get too worked up before you have all the information. 
  • kelk5kelk5
    500 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
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    @aimsforyou2014, I agree with others to try not to worry too much until they can do further tests. My cousin's baby showed markers for Downs Syndrome with the anatomy test but he did not have Downs Syndrome and false positives do occur. I also agree with @scatteringashes to take a look at some you tube videos and documentaries on individuals with Downs Syndrome from their perspective. Born This Way on  A&E is a great show that follows individuals with Downs Syndrome. Many live rich fullfilling lives, it's like with everyone else a lot depends on how they are raised. My SIL has Downs Syndrome and I work with individuals with Developmental Disabilities so if you want to talk more then PM me. I'm happy to answer anything I can (i.e., I'm not a Downs Syndrome expert but I know a bit about it).
  • @aimsforyou2014 during our genetic testing with DD1 our tech thought they saw a hole in the heart and heart issues run in the family.  Long story short we went to several specialists, and they prepared us for Dd1 having issues and possibly not surviving.  We moved towards the end of our pregnancy and saw new Drs who told us it was 50/50.  She was born fine with no issues and is 4 yo.
    image
    kelk5agalvarado
  • schazeschaze
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
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    STM+s, how early were you able to feel your baby move? I've read you could feel it around 12 weeks but anybody know how accurate that is? I didn't feel DD until 18w, hoping to maybe feel some flutters a little earlier!
  • @schaze I didn't feel DS2 until way late (later than DS1 by almost a month!) because I had an anterior placenta, but I've definitely been feeling this little guy move for about a week or so now. FX  you start feeling those flutters soon!
    DS1: Nov 2013
    DS2: Jan 2016
    DS3: Dec 2017
    Baby 4 on the way!
    crizz13schazedarkrose88
  • @schaze, I didn't feel DD until 20 weeks (anterior placenta), but I swear I'm already feeling this little one. 13+4 now!
    Jan18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies

    **TW**
    BFP #1: 12/1/14 said goodbye 1/2/15
    BFP #2: 5/5/15
    EDD: 1/15/16
    Wren Marie born 1/7/16
    BFP #3 4/26/17
    EDD: 12/30/17
    crizz13KatieElschazeagalvarado
  • @crizz13 we were just having the same discussion about DC for dd1. We pay monthly so January will already be covered so we will probably still send her at least part of the time. I'm torn about the rest of my leave though. I like hanging out with her but she was also a very needy infant so it makes the choice tough! 

    @schaze I've heard you can feel the second sooner, so maybe you will! 
    crizz13
  • @schaze I didn't feel DS till closer to 30 weeks, also an anterior placenta plus my weight was a factor. I'm really hoping that this time I won't have that anterior placenta to keep me from feeling things. 

    J18 December Siggy Challenge: Christmas Movies
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  • @schaze my first I felt around 18 weeks. Second I felt around 14. I'm 13 weeks today and occasionally am feeling faint movements within the past couple weeks. It is definitely possible! 
    Joey 06.05.2010, MC Jan 2014-EDD 09.11.2014, Aurelia 08.24.2015 (lost twin ~12 weeks), Ectopic Loss Feb 2016, EDD 01.03.2018
    schazeKezzy44
  • @aimsforyou2014 Thinking of you! Hugs!!
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