Hi. I haven't participated on this board in a couple of months but I was hoping someone might be able to tell me if there are conversations or threads somewhere regarding donor eggs. The 'third party page is very quiet.
We have done three ER's without producing any transferable embryos so using donor eggs will likely be part of the conversation soon. Thanks.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
Hello! I am glad you asked - the third-party page is definitely very quiet. I found a very active discussion board on Babycenter related to donor egg IVF and it has been a huge help to me as that's what I just pursued after five losses in three years and then a year of being unable to conceive at all. Here's a link: https://community.babycenter.com/groups/a6688175/egg_donor_ivf
I am an open book about this stuff, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask me or PM me. I'd be happy to try and help. I understand how alienating it can feel.... Good luck with whatever you choose!
***TW*** My first transfer was successful, though it's still quite early. I am currently 5w5d with what appears to be a singleton after transferring two.
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
@fivetimesnoluck sorry to highjack! Just wanted to drop in and say CONGRATS!! That is amazing! So happy for you!
**TW** Me: 31, DH:33 TTC since October 2015: MFI Summer 2016: 3 IUI's: BFN October 2016: Switched RE's and began IVF cycle December 2016: Retrieved 13 eggs, 12 mature, 9 fertilized with ICSI. 5 day ET of 2 blasts with 4 frosites left. BFP!!!! EDD: 8/30/2017 August 25, 2017: It's a Girl!! April 12, 2019: FET, BFP!!! Baby BOY EDD: 12/29/2019
@fivetimesnoluck Thank you for sharing and congratulations! The more I look into the possibility the better I feel about it but its a whole new ballgame and I have so much to learn meanwhile I don't know if we are giving up too fast on my eggs. I will start to lurk the babycenter board.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75- I'm actually starting the egg donor process right now, so I would be happy to chat too! Maybe we can keep this thread going and others will join us, because I think there are a few others out there doing egg donor too.
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
@laurad75 I'm also doing DE. We are most likely starting in July/Aug just due to June-July being crazy busy for us. It's taken almost 3 months to find a suitable donor. We have to find a donor that is military/dependent to cycle at the military hospital but the agency specializes in finding these donors, it just takes lots of time. I think we did find a match and hopefully my hubby agrees to her. I was almost wanting to give up and just when I thought about it she came along! We are still discussing the details but I'm hoping it will all work out! I need this to work out! Let me know if you want to chat! We are a small group!
Me: 37 / Hubs: 42 TTC: April 2013 DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1 Clinic NMCSD IUI #1 July/Aug 2016 IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome) Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
To those of you who are starting the process: how did you decide to do fresh vs frozen. My clinic seems to focus on frozen which would be easier and less expensive but then we would only get a lot of 6 or 7 eggs and hope they fertilize.
How did you decide to stop trying with your OE? Part of me is ready to move on to DE but then I feel like I'm giving up too fast.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75- Making the choice to move on to DE is probably the hardest decision I have had to make. All the details are in my siggy, but even after 1 cancelled IVF and 2 failed IVFs (with none to freeze), I was planning to try again 1 more time. My RE was fine with either doing 1 more round or donor. It was a hard choice because I'm young (29), so I should have decent eggs, but it really seems to be an egg quality issue. She thinks i probably have some normal eggs, but wasn't sure how many rounds it would take to find one. After 3 months of cysts and delays for trying to start our 4th round, I couldn't take the limbo any more. It was like my body was telling me it was done. So me and my husband had a heart to heart and decided it was time to move on. I believe if I meant to have a genetic child, then we still will naturally, but I can't keep living my life like I have been the last year. I still have days where I wonder if I should have kept trying, since I only did 2 ER and got 2 day 5 early blasts the second round... but most days I am more excited at the odds of having success with donor (92% at my clinic with fresh).
My RE (Dr. Rodgers from the Beat Infertility podcasts), definitely recommended fresh since it will give us the option of potentially 2 or more children. It is more expensive and a longer process, and its not guaranteed to give us multiple children, but the odds are better. So for us, we didn't really consider frozen and will be using our clinic's in house donors (assuming one of our 3 choices will work out). We are currently waiting for them to finish their current cycles (sometime between end of June- August), and I'm hoping we can get to transfer by Aug/Sept. Trying to be patient.. but its a long process ahead.
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
My situation is unique because fresh cost the same as frozen since I'm using the military grant - the grant doesn't apply to the Egg cohort so I was going to have to pay full price for frozen and then reduced fees for embryology and transfer. I also would like more than one child and I was nervous only getting 6 frozen eggs may only allow us one child. Since the cost is the same, we prefer fresh cycle but that has its own host of issues since we need a Tricare eligible donor that has access to the military base. Slim pickings! We've been patiently waiting almost 3 months to find a match.
The decision to move to DE was easy for me. I committed to two IVF cycles and if they didn't work I would move on. 1st cycle was cancelled because of dominant follicle. 2nd cycle was delayed 4 weeks because of cyst and dominant follicle but we finally made it to stim with 12 equal follies at baseline and then 6-8 growing during stims. At egg retrieval, they weren't able to collect any eggs so I was out and done with my own eggs. The only struggles I have now is finding a match. But I'm glad I didn't try again with my own eggs. It's just a waste of time!
Me: 37 / Hubs: 42 TTC: April 2013 DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1 Clinic NMCSD IUI #1 July/Aug 2016 IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome) Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
*TW* I just had lunch today with my egg donor (she was a friend of a friend who had frozen eggs left from her ivf due to MFI). She met and held my 2mo old for the first time. My husband asked if it was weird, I told him in my mind a little, but in my heart this little girl is all mine. DE is not an easy decision but wouldn't change for anything in the world! Any ladies facing this decision can feel free to message me!
******TW***** Me 39 DH44
Married 8/2/14
TTC 9/14
Dx: PCOS, blocked L fallopian tube, suspect poor egg quality
MFI (low #, poor morphology)
IVF #1 9/15 Failed
IVF #2 12/15 Failed 1st DE FET 5/16-BFN 2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP 8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
I had my daughter a whole year ago using DE. A harrowing journey, to be sure (you can see my crazy history). But I have never doubted our decision, and couldn't be happier with her.
As for "giving up on my own eggs", they wouldn't even let me try to do IVF with them. My AMH was less than 0.01 and I was near a breaking point after medicated natural cycles (never had problems getting preg, just keeping it). After a lot of soul searching, I decided to let to. To try and stop making the perfect egg. They told me it was my best chance of having a baby and at 40, 3 MCs in, I was cooked emotionally.
As you can see *TW* I am pregnant again. With my OE. We were NTNP and bam, when my daughter was 8 months old, we got pregnant again and I'm in the 2nd tri! The day I was supposed to talk about implanting another DE embryo, I actually had a 6w U/S. Sometimes l like to play the "would have I got preg with my OE without my DD?" game. But I love her more than words can express and it took the whole universe to get her to us.
And sorry for my giant rainbow baby tracker. I don't usually post on this board but wanted to chime in.
Since most are pursuing fresh cycles, I'll give you my perspective on why we chose frozen and anonymous: time, risk, and money.
I knew exactly how many eggs I was going to receive. I knew they were already available and in storage. The bank I chose and the lab we used had a relationship that meant I was guaranteed that at least four would thaw. (I was not guaranteed any specific number of embryos.) I knew we could buy additional eggs from the same donor if we wanted/needed more than 6. (We did not purchase additional eggs.)
Our cost totaled in the range of $19-20,000. The egg lot was $11k. The rest was the cost of drugs (which were mostly covered by insurance, but the procedures were not), shipping, monitoring, fertilization with ICSI, assisted hatching was included but not needed, the actual transfer and storage of the additional frosties for the coming year.
We raised and saved money for a few months after making the decision this was our best path. But, aside from that few months, everything moved really quickly. From selection of donor to transfer was just over 5 weeks. We chose our donor and placed the order for the lot of eggs on March 24. I arranged shipment with Cryoport on April 6 and they then shipped the following week (we didn't want them delivered over the weekend) and were received by my lab on April 11. I had my monitoring u/s and was told we were going to push back my schedule by about 4 or 5 days due to hormone levels, my lining looked good. The eggs were thawed and we went in for DH to provide his sample on April 26. Got reports on the number thawed and on day 3. Arrived May 1 for transfer and learned all six had developed to the appropriate stage. Transferred two. Got one to stick.
Since I have been stalking others here and on babycenter, the most common challenge for people doing fresh cycles seems to be the donor. Sometimes the pool is limited. Sometimes they flake out. Sometimes they fail various testing. Sometimes the timeline keeps getting drawn out. Sometimes the costs skyrocket. There are just simply a lot of unknown variables. We have been trying for #1 since early 2013. So, I was not willing to wait through that process. Our doc suggested frozen over fresh simply because as he explained it, the less people involved, the less complications you will encounter.
I know I wrote a novel - I haven't been doing much work lately (oops!), but I hope that this information is helpful as you weigh your options. I believe what I chose worked perfectly for me, I liked the speed and limited risk involved in this path.... but I want you to make the best choice for you, whatever that is!
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
@fivetimesnoluck I appreciate you sharing your story. While we have a lot to learn I feel like I would prefer frozen for similar reasons as you had. We have a meeting scheduled with our RE next week and a second opinion appt next week too so I'm interested in their input given our history.
I hope more people join this thread to share their stories. Thank you everyone who has jumped on board so far!
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75 the process with fresh can take some time but if you go with a proven donor, the process is a little shorter since they've already been through a bunch of testing. I agree that frozen is less hassle and easier to choose from a huge database, lots of choices! If your husband doesn't have any issues then it's pretty likely your whole cohort will thaw and fertilize!
My update: I had a call with the agency yesterday because even though I've been trying to find a donor for almost three months, I had no idea how the process worked prior to IVF cycle. So we walked through everything including timelines. The whole process can take 3-4 months so if we start June 1, transfer won't be until August or September! My husband and I have our psych consult tomorrow and he said we will talk about the timeline then. He has not been involved at all in the process, he doesn't even want to see the donor profile right now. It doesn't hurt me though, I'm fine doing all the work!
Me: 37 / Hubs: 42 TTC: April 2013 DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1 Clinic NMCSD IUI #1 July/Aug 2016 IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome) Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
@fivetimesnoluck makes some great points about Frozen! While I am trying to do fresh now, if we start to have issues with donors backing out, or not being available, or just start having month of delays, we may consider frozen then too. I'm hoping using my clinics in house donor pool, and not an agency, will help minimize the risk for those complications. But it does definitely take longer for fresh.
@Mandasand- so glad you are continuing to move forward! I had my psych consult a few weeks ago and it was very simple. I think she was surprised how we had already discussed and talked about most of the things they ask (like will we tell the child, what we wanted in a donor, etc). I also drove the process too, but I did have my husband look at the donor database. A few months ago we had looked together, just in case, and then once we made the decision for sure, we looked seperately and picked our top 3. We picked the same top 3, in the same order, so I felt good we both wanted the same ones. Now just hoping one of them works out. I think until I actually have a committed donor and get started, I still am greiving my own eggs every so often. I feel like once we get the ball really going, I will hopefully just get excited and not sad any more.
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
@JamieH2000 I'm a little embarrassed to admit but my husband and I have actually talked very little about DE. He wanted to know what the doctor and I discussed the day after my "no egg retrieval" which was to use donor eggs. And we talked again when I told him I made a spreadsheet of our options including the fresh and frozen agency that works with our clinic - he asked me to send him the spreadsheet and then has not said much more about it. I asked if he checked the links and said no. He's been saying he doesn't want to talk about it - he's not ready to discuss it but he knows and understands that I'm moving forward. He agreed to go to the psychologist and he knows we have a donor match. In anticipation of our appointment tomorrow he said he will be ready to discuss it all at the appointment. It's been 11 weeks so I cutely said, "babe, it's been 11 weeks, it's time for you to discuss this with me." And he said "I'm going to the appointment so I guess that tells you I'm ready to talk about it...but not until Saturday!" So, there we have it! He knows if he doesn't agree to this than it's another discussion we're having so I'm sure if he didn't want to move forward we would have already had THAT talk! Men, I just don't get them sometimes!
Me: 37 / Hubs: 42 TTC: April 2013 DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1 Clinic NMCSD IUI #1 July/Aug 2016 IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome) Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
@mandasand- no judgement here!! This is one of the hardest things a couple can go through. So o get it. I'm sure he is coming around. It's good he's willing to go and maybe it will help to have the coversation with a professional third party. That is the point of the meeting. I just hope there aren't any surprises about his opinions. Maybe he will decide he wants to talk with you before it still.. hoping it goes smoothly and you can keep on moving forward! My husbands biggest unhappiness about this all is the cost as he would be happy never having a children. But now that he's seen me at some really dark days he know how important this is to me, and just ready for us to success and stop this tortuous journey and be happy again.
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
@mandasand hey, just wanted to say, we are not in a DE situation but my H is the exact same way about discussing treatment. He has his MESA/TESE scheduled late July and I'm sure it'll be me going, hey are you okay with everything? You wanna talk about anything before your procedure? And he will be like, "No, what's there to talk about? I said I would go do it and I will!" Ughh. Okay dear. At least we try ;)
@mandasand@BusinessWife It's so hard to encourage the conversation without being pushy. I understand that men don't think about babies the same way we do but sometimes I wonder if my H is just going along with this because he knows its important to me. He thinks its enough to be supportive but this isn't 'my thing' its OUR thing.
@BusinessWife I know you have struggled with your H making it a priority and you have the patience of a Saint for sure.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
Mind if I join in the convo? My 3rd round of IVF was cancelled this morning on day 16 of stims for poor response (my follicles stopped growing probably around day 13). We're just starting moving toward the DE path and have a wtf appointment with the RE on June 19th to see what they recommend.
Ugh @20T I'm so sorry. Of course you are welcome to join the convo while you figure things out. I'm in a similar boat. I think we will try one more round with my eggs but after that I imagine it will be time to move on. It's so hard. Are you okay?
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@20t- we have been on this ride so long together and I'm so sad to see your update. Feel free to PM me any time. Really hoping your RE has some good advice on the 19th. It's such a hard decision but I must say I am excited for the the chance to be successful with DE. Thinking of you!
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
Hi all, first timer here, please be gentle as I am still learning the acronyms and lingo! This is exactly the thread I was hoping for! I really appreciate hearing the different opinions/experiences with fresh vs frozen.
Bear with me, long-ish backstory about our fresh donor experience (so far):
Nearly 3 years into our POF/DOR infertility journey, my DH's company announced partial fresh donor IVF coverage starting in 2017 (frozen is not covered, even though I wish it was after hearing @fivetimesnoluck's rationale!). Either way, we never thought in a million years that we'd get any kind of coverage!
Once we received our list of in-network clinics, we discovered that 4 of them share the same donor pool. Hopeful that this meant more options, we quickly chose a local branch and did 3 months of testing/consultations. It was only after clearing all the hurdles that we found out there were only about 12 donors between all 4 clinics, with only 6 eligible before Dec 2017. Of these 6, the only donor that we felt connected to was already pending a match. We were saddened and discouraged by having so few options and did not feel like we could cope with waiting 9 more months for another round of uncertainty.
As a result, we switched to our final in-network clinic. After a few more months of evaluations/consultations/waiting lists, we were finally able to select our top 3 choices out of a pool of 10 active donors. Our donor coordinator reached out to our 1st choice, and BOOM we were matched!!! When I called on day 1 of my next cycle, overjoyed and eager to start, I received the heartbreaking news that despite agreeing to a cycle, our donor backed out the day before we were going to start. I held back tears, but only because I felt like I needed to remain optimistic. So onto #2 we went. After 3 agonizing days, our coordinator called back with more bad news. Donor #2 was unavailable until December. Finally, last week our 3rd donor choice graciously agreed to match with us! While my DH and I want to be relieved and excited, we are cautiously optimistic, as she still has a few tests left before being fully approved. We won't know if there's a green light for another two weeks.
Through all of this, this thread reminds me that we are not alone in the ups and downs of a fresh IVF journey. Or any infertility journey, for that matter. I ache for all of the stories I've read in these forums. This can be such a crappy process, and I'm so sad that this is a struggle we have to endure.
I do know that talking and sharing helps, though. So thank you for being here.
Me: 31 , DH: 32 Married: 8/27/10 - TTC #1: March 2014 OBGYN referral to RE: July 2015 RE #1: Sep-Nov 2015, Diagnosis: POF, DOR RE #2 & failed Letrozole, need for IVF confirmed: Jan-Mar 2016 RE #3 & workup for fresh DE IVF: Jan-Mar 2017 (too few donors in pool) Back to RE #1 & fresh DE IVF: Matched w/ 3rd choice (first 2 backed out), pending finalized donor workup June 2017 (Fingers crossed for June/July prep, August/Sept transfer)
Thanks @BusinessWife@laurad75 and @JamieH2000. It was a rough weekend at our house, but I'm feeling surprisingly calm about it today. I wish we had been able to do more than 1 transfer after 3 rounds of IVF, as it just feels so abrupt for it all to be over. My H confessed to me on Saturday that he had never felt hopeful about this round so there's that too. We got a call yesterday that they're actually going to fit us in for our wtf on Thursday so that's a plus, at least we won't have to wait until the 19th.
I really hope your 3rd donor is your perfect match @ranahalynn!
@20T. Oh so glad you're feeling a bit better. This stuff can be so hard - so much riding on it, so many emotions.... I kwym about only having one transfer so far. I almost cant even believe it. But hopefully you're feeling another degree better about everything this morning, and another step better after TOMORROW'S appt!!! That is so amazing they could fit you in right away! ❤
Thank you everyone who has contributed here so far. We met with both our current RE and another RE who came highly recommended for a second opinion appointment. They both highly recommended that we start to investigate DE IVF at this point and did not support continuing IVF treatment with my own eggs. I thought I would be sad but to be honest from the first failed ER I knew in my gut that this wasn't going to work and I feel more hopeful than ever that we will get our family going this new route.
For the next couple of months we are going to casually try on our own with expectations in check. In a couple of weeks we are attending a donor egg seminar at our clinic but have nothing to do in the meantime. If anyone has resources, good websites or blogs or whatever to share regarding DE please send it on. I'm too excited to just sit around and wait!
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75 I am excited for you to move ahead. I don't know if it's going to hit me at some point down the road, but for me, I really have not had a significant sadness about moving forward with this decision. I feel grateful for the opportunity to carry our child and for the advancements in science that made this all possible. And I have no doubts about how strongly I will bond with any baby that comes into our family.
I guess my point is, everyone processes this path differently. For me, having hope and more confidence than ever before that this is going to help us achieve our take-home baby is worth any trade off.
If I come across any more resources or links to share, I will be sure to post them! Keep us posted on your progress. Wishing you all the best!
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75 there is a Parents Via Egg Donation Forum- used to be free but now there is a charge.I found working with a counselor familiar with infertility and third party reproduction super helpful. Hope you can get started soon!
******TW***** Me 39 DH44
Married 8/2/14
TTC 9/14
Dx: PCOS, blocked L fallopian tube, suspect poor egg quality
MFI (low #, poor morphology)
IVF #1 9/15 Failed
IVF #2 12/15 Failed 1st DE FET 5/16-BFN 2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP 8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
@2legsbaby- I thought about joining that site but wasn't sure it was worth the money. Did you use it when it was free?
@laurad75- glad you are feeling excited about moving forward!! We are trying naturally too until we can retain a donor and there is nothing like a few months of natural failures (hopefully not of course!) to remind me why we are pursuing the path we are. I still get my hopes up each month that this will be our miracle since besides lower amh, there really isn't anything wrong except probably poor quality. I'll look for donor resources and share any I find. It will be good to have some others on here to share the experience with!!
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
@JamieH2000 I did use it when it was free and when I was first struggling with the decision to use donor eggs, there were a lot of members and different boards (including some for husbands!). I saw on their site now that you can use for 48h and if unhappy get your money back... not sure how many members now that there is a fee, but might be worth checking out!
******TW***** Me 39 DH44
Married 8/2/14
TTC 9/14
Dx: PCOS, blocked L fallopian tube, suspect poor egg quality
MFI (low #, poor morphology)
IVF #1 9/15 Failed
IVF #2 12/15 Failed 1st DE FET 5/16-BFN 2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP 8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
For those who pursued DE IVF how did you choose an agency? I have been researching agencies and focusing on those that have a good amount of local donors to avoid travel fees if we can. The agency that has the most options with the highest quality donors is NAFG but their donor fees are 10,000 - 15,000 which is way above all other agencies. I was curious if anyone had insight or thoughts on this part of the process.
I'm also desperate to keep this thread alive.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
Hi @laurad7 (and everyone!), I'm still here and want to keep this thread going too!
If we go the DE route, we are looking at frozen eggs for a variety of reasons. Our RE and Embryologist said they've worked with Fairfax Egg Bank in the past and have had good results, but I can't remember if you wanted to use fresh or frozen. I like the frozen route because it seems more anonymous and can be done when I'm ready as opposed to having to sync cycles, etc. But I haven't found a donor on there that I would be comfortable with yet.
I'm still really struggling with this decision and it doesn't help that my RE thinks we should do one more round with my OE because of my age (I'm 33). He said that if he'd have the results I've had with someone over 36, he'd recommend going directly to DE but that he was struggling because of my age. Thanks buddy....that non-answer is not helpful! I can't really wrap my head around not having my own biological child. I know it sounds really selfish, but I always imagined looking at my baby and seeing some piece of me or my family looking back at me. I don't really know how to give that up. My H just doesn't seem to understand that and keeps saying but it'll be your baby because you'll carry it and give birth to it. I found this article: https://blog.pved.org/2009/07/20/women-who-give-birth-to-donor-egg-babies-are-the-biological-moms/ but would like to see more of the research before believing it (although I really want to).
We've decided to take some time off (just a few months)for now, to heal and figure things out. This TTC/IF journey has taken over the last 2 years of our lives and I can't even remember what I like to do for fun. I feel like that'll be easier said then done though and I'm eager to maintain this thread to work all of these issues out with you all!
@20T I hear you loud and clear. If one of the doctors gave me any hope that we could still succeed with my own eggs I'm sure we would have kept going. Obviously it was very hard to hear that the chance of conceiving was very slim but it made the decision to go DE much easier. I have read a bunch of those articles and need to believe that its true - both doctors that I saw had so many positive things to say about DE including the studies on imprinting and epigenetics (those may be the same thing).
In regards to Frozen vs Fresh - I am waiting to hear back from our financial coordinator to confirm our insurance coverage. If my insurance covers anything for DE IVF it will only be for fresh eggs so we will go that route. Otherwise, we will likely do a guaranteed plan with frozen.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75- glad you want to keep the thread alive!! I'll stay here with you! As far as agencies, I didn't look into any since my clinic (FCI in Chicago) has an in house donor base (with about 20 or so caucasin donors right now). Its cheaper to use their in house donor base since they are all screened and ready to go. You could look into traveling to a clinic with an in house donor base instead of using an agency. I know that CNY has an in house donor base and has veryyy cheap prices, though you don't get quite as many eggs, but it may be worth looking into if you are considering traveling.
@20T- we are on a little break right now (since our donors aren't available for a another month or two), and its really nice! Went on our first real vacation in a while! Now if only we could travel somewhere and not worry about Zika. I would definitely be on the beach somewhere I was in a similar situation to you, where my RE said I could definitely try again with my own eggs, but it was also totally reasonable to move on to donor- Meaning it was completely up to us and she didn't really have a strong opinion. I think you probably knew we were planning to try one more time, but then I was delayed for 2 months with cysts and decided it was my body's message it was time to move on. Sometimes I wonder if I am moving on too fast, since I am only 29 and have only been trying 2 years. But then I think about how many tries we have had with TI, IUI, IVF and how we have NEVER had any pregnancy. So it makes me convinced there is something wrong with my eggs. We are currently trying naturally, and with each natural fail, it reminds me why I am going down this path. I don't think I will feel 100% confident in this path until I get my BFP. Then all doubts will melt away and that will be the child that is meant for me. Our thought was also that since we are young, if we are meant to have a genetic child, it will still happen someday in the next 10-15 years. But I can't live my life like this for the next 10 years trying. I would rather move on and hopefully be blessed with children from DE, and then have a miracle later if its meant to happen. Sorry for the novel.. but know that you aren't alone and I also have similar moments of doubt, worry and yet hopeful/excitement.
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
Thank you @JamieH2000 I really need to just calm down for now. We are attending a seminar at our clinic next week where they will go over all the information with us but I'm so impatient and want to know it all NOW.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@laurad75- I totally get it! once you decide to go this way, its like let's just get the show on the road!! I am also trying to stay patient but its hard. hopefully you can get things going quickly after the seminar. Do you know if they have an in house database you can start looking at?
History in Spoiler
Age: 32 (same with DH). Together since 2006, Married June 2013 and TTC since August 2015 Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive) March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary. August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e Back for # 2!
As far as I know they do not have an in-house database but I've been looking at the donors on from the agencies I believe they work with.
History and blog link in spoiler
2016 - dx with super low ovarian reserve; failed cycle with clomid, failed IUI, 2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks May 2020 FET; BFN July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate Oct 2020 BFP!
@20T- we are on a little break right now (since our donors aren't available for a another month or two), and its really nice! Went on our first real vacation in a while! Now if only we could travel somewhere and not worry about Zika. I would definitely be on the beach somewhere I was in a similar situation to you, where my RE said I could definitely try again with my own eggs, but it was also totally reasonable to move on to donor- Meaning it was completely up to us and she didn't really have a strong opinion. I think you probably knew we were planning to try one more time, but then I was delayed for 2 months with cysts and decided it was my body's message it was time to move on. Sometimes I wonder if I am moving on too fast, since I am only 29 and have only been trying 2 years. But then I think about how many tries we have had with TI, IUI, IVF and how we have NEVER had any pregnancy. So it makes me convinced there is something wrong with my eggs. We are currently trying naturally, and with each natural fail, it reminds me why I am going down this path. I don't think I will feel 100% confident in this path until I get my BFP. Then all doubts will melt away and that will be the child that is meant for me. Our thought was also that since we are young, if we are meant to have a genetic child, it will still happen someday in the next 10-15 years. But I can't live my life like this for the next 10 years trying. I would rather move on and hopefully be blessed with children from DE, and then have a miracle later if its meant to happen. Sorry for the novel.. but know that you aren't alone and I also have similar moments of doubt, worry and yet hopeful/excitement.
@JamieH2000 you are SO spot on. That was so helpful to hear, thank you!
Re: IVF with donor eggs
I am an open book about this stuff, so if you have any questions, feel free to ask me or PM me. I'd be happy to try and help. I understand how alienating it can feel.... Good luck with whatever you choose!
***TW***
My first transfer was successful, though it's still quite early. I am currently 5w5d with what appears to be a singleton after transferring two.
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL! E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
Me: 31, DH:33
TTC since October 2015: MFI
Summer 2016: 3 IUI's: BFN
October 2016: Switched RE's and began IVF cycle
December 2016: Retrieved 13 eggs, 12 mature, 9 fertilized with ICSI. 5 day ET of 2 blasts with 4 frosites left. BFP!!!! EDD: 8/30/2017
August 25, 2017: It's a Girl!!
April 12, 2019: FET, BFP!!! Baby BOY EDD: 12/29/2019
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
TTC: April 2013
DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1
Clinic NMCSD
IUI #1 July/Aug 2016
IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle
IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome)
Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
How did you decide to stop trying with your OE? Part of me is ready to move on to DE but then I feel like I'm giving up too fast.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
My RE (Dr. Rodgers from the Beat Infertility podcasts), definitely recommended fresh since it will give us the option of potentially 2 or more children. It is more expensive and a longer process, and its not guaranteed to give us multiple children, but the odds are better. So for us, we didn't really consider frozen and will be using our clinic's in house donors (assuming one of our 3 choices will work out). We are currently waiting for them to finish their current cycles (sometime between end of June- August), and I'm hoping we can get to transfer by Aug/Sept. Trying to be patient.. but its a long process ahead.
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
The decision to move to DE was easy for me. I committed to two IVF cycles and if they didn't work I would move on. 1st cycle was cancelled because of dominant follicle. 2nd cycle was delayed 4 weeks because of cyst and dominant follicle but we finally made it to stim with 12 equal follies at baseline and then 6-8 growing during stims. At egg retrieval, they weren't able to collect any eggs so I was out and done with my own eggs. The only struggles I have now is finding a match. But I'm glad I didn't try again with my own eggs. It's just a waste of time!
TTC: April 2013
DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1
Clinic NMCSD
IUI #1 July/Aug 2016
IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle
IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome)
Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
I just had lunch today with my egg donor (she was a friend of a friend who had frozen eggs left from her ivf due to MFI). She met and held my 2mo old for the first time. My husband asked if it was weird, I told him in my mind a little, but in my heart this little girl is all mine. DE is not an easy decision but wouldn't change for anything in the world! Any ladies facing this decision can feel free to message me!
Me 39 DH44
1st DE FET 5/16-BFN
2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP
8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
I had my daughter a whole year ago using DE. A harrowing journey, to be sure (you can see my crazy history). But I have never doubted our decision, and couldn't be happier with her.
As for "giving up on my own eggs", they wouldn't even let me try to do IVF with them. My AMH was less than 0.01 and I was near a breaking point after medicated natural cycles (never had problems getting preg, just keeping it). After a lot of soul searching, I decided to let to. To try and stop making the perfect egg. They told me it was my best chance of having a baby and at 40, 3 MCs in, I was cooked emotionally.
As you can see *TW* I am pregnant again. With my OE. We were NTNP and bam, when my daughter was 8 months old, we got pregnant again and I'm in the 2nd tri! The day I was supposed to talk about implanting another DE embryo, I actually had a 6w U/S. Sometimes l like to play the "would have I got preg with my OE without my DD?" game. But I love her more than words can express and it took the whole universe to get her to us.
And sorry for my giant rainbow baby tracker. I don't usually post on this board but wanted to chime in.
Me: 42, DH: 46, Married: 11/12
Losses: MMC#1 11/12 BO, MC#2 11/13 at 8w BO?, MMC#3 8/14 chromo healthy M @12 weeks, stopped growing at 10.
Negligible AMH, FSH finally went high. Pursued DE.
DD born at 38w2d on 5-27-16. Finally!!
Pregnant again with OE. EDD 11/9/17 Girl!
I knew exactly how many eggs I was going to receive. I knew they were already available and in storage. The bank I chose and the lab we used had a relationship that meant I was guaranteed that at least four would thaw. (I was not guaranteed any specific number of embryos.) I knew we could buy additional eggs from the same donor if we wanted/needed more than 6. (We did not purchase additional eggs.)
Our cost totaled in the range of $19-20,000. The egg lot was $11k. The rest was the cost of drugs (which were mostly covered by insurance, but the procedures were not), shipping, monitoring, fertilization with ICSI, assisted hatching was included but not needed, the actual transfer and storage of the additional frosties for the coming year.
We raised and saved money for a few months after making the decision this was our best path. But, aside from that few months, everything moved really quickly. From selection of donor to transfer was just over 5 weeks. We chose our donor and placed the order for the lot of eggs on March 24. I arranged shipment with Cryoport on April 6 and they then shipped the following week (we didn't want them delivered over the weekend) and were received by my lab on April 11. I had my monitoring u/s and was told we were going to push back my schedule by about 4 or 5 days due to hormone levels, my lining looked good. The eggs were thawed and we went in for DH to provide his sample on April 26. Got reports on the number thawed and on day 3. Arrived May 1 for transfer and learned all six had developed to the appropriate stage. Transferred two. Got one to stick.
Since I have been stalking others here and on babycenter, the most common challenge for people doing fresh cycles seems to be the donor. Sometimes the pool is limited. Sometimes they flake out. Sometimes they fail various testing. Sometimes the timeline keeps getting drawn out. Sometimes the costs skyrocket. There are just simply a lot of unknown variables. We have been trying for #1 since early 2013. So, I was not willing to wait through that process. Our doc suggested frozen over fresh simply because as he explained it, the less people involved, the less complications you will encounter.
I know I wrote a novel - I haven't been doing much work lately (oops!), but I hope that this information is helpful as you weigh your options. I believe what I chose worked perfectly for me, I liked the speed and limited risk involved in this path.... but I want you to make the best choice for you, whatever that is!
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL! E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
I hope more people join this thread to share their stories. Thank you everyone who has jumped on board so far!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
My update: I had a call with the agency yesterday because even though I've been trying to find a donor for almost three months, I had no idea how the process worked prior to IVF cycle. So we walked through everything including timelines. The whole process can take 3-4 months so if we start June 1, transfer won't be until August or September! My husband and I have our psych consult tomorrow and he said we will talk about the timeline then. He has not been involved at all in the process, he doesn't even want to see the donor profile right now. It doesn't hurt me though, I'm fine doing all the work!
TTC: April 2013
DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1
Clinic NMCSD
IUI #1 July/Aug 2016
IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle
IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome)
Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
@Mandasand- so glad you are continuing to move forward! I had my psych consult a few weeks ago and it was very simple. I think she was surprised how we had already discussed and talked about most of the things they ask (like will we tell the child, what we wanted in a donor, etc). I also drove the process too, but I did have my husband look at the donor database. A few months ago we had looked together, just in case, and then once we made the decision for sure, we looked seperately and picked our top 3. We picked the same top 3, in the same order, so I felt good we both wanted the same ones. Now just hoping one of them works out. I think until I actually have a committed donor and get started, I still am greiving my own eggs every so often. I feel like once we get the ball really going, I will hopefully just get excited and not sad any more.
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
TTC: April 2013
DOR: AMH .3 - 1.31 (it varies); FSH: 5.1
Clinic NMCSD
IUI #1 July/Aug 2016
IVF #1 Sep/Oct Microdose Lupron Protocol - IVF cancelled only 1 follicle
IVF #2 Feb/Mar Antagonist protocol w/estrogen priming - 0 eggs retrieved (empty follicle syndrome)
Donor Egg Cycle as soon as we find a match
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
@BusinessWife I know you have struggled with your H making it a priority and you have the patience of a Saint for sure.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
Bear with me, long-ish backstory about our fresh donor experience (so far):
Nearly 3 years into our POF/DOR infertility journey, my DH's company announced partial fresh donor IVF coverage starting in 2017 (frozen is not covered, even though I wish it was after hearing @fivetimesnoluck's rationale!). Either way, we never thought in a million years that we'd get any kind of coverage!
Once we received our list of in-network clinics, we discovered that 4 of them share the same donor pool. Hopeful that this meant more options, we quickly chose a local branch and did 3 months of testing/consultations. It was only after clearing all the hurdles that we found out there were only about 12 donors between all 4 clinics, with only 6 eligible before Dec 2017. Of these 6, the only donor that we felt connected to was already pending a match. We were saddened and discouraged by having so few options and did not feel like we could cope with waiting 9 more months for another round of uncertainty.
As a result, we switched to our final in-network clinic. After a few more months of evaluations/consultations/waiting lists, we were finally able to select our top 3 choices out of a pool of 10 active donors. Our donor coordinator reached out to our 1st choice, and BOOM we were matched!!! When I called on day 1 of my next cycle, overjoyed and eager to start, I received the heartbreaking news that despite agreeing to a cycle, our donor backed out the day before we were going to start. I held back tears, but only because I felt like I needed to remain optimistic. So onto #2 we went. After 3 agonizing days, our coordinator called back with more bad news. Donor #2 was unavailable until December. Finally, last week our 3rd donor choice graciously agreed to match with us! While my DH and I want to be relieved and excited, we are cautiously optimistic, as she still has a few tests left before being fully approved. We won't know if there's a green light for another two weeks.
Through all of this, this thread reminds me that we are not alone in the ups and downs of a fresh IVF journey. Or any infertility journey, for that matter. I ache for all of the stories I've read in these forums. This can be such a crappy process, and I'm so sad that this is a struggle we have to endure.
I do know that talking and sharing helps, though. So thank you for being here.
Married: 8/27/10 - TTC #1: March 2014
OBGYN referral to RE: July 2015
RE #1: Sep-Nov 2015, Diagnosis: POF, DOR
RE #2 & failed Letrozole, need for IVF confirmed: Jan-Mar 2016
RE #3 & workup for fresh DE IVF: Jan-Mar 2017 (too few donors in pool)
Back to RE #1 & fresh DE IVF: Matched w/ 3rd choice (first 2 backed out), pending finalized donor workup June 2017 (Fingers crossed for June/July prep, August/Sept transfer)
I really hope your 3rd donor is your perfect match @ranahalynn!
For the next couple of months we are going to casually try on our own with expectations in check. In a couple of weeks we are attending a donor egg seminar at our clinic but have nothing to do in the meantime. If anyone has resources, good websites or blogs or whatever to share regarding DE please send it on. I'm too excited to just sit around and wait!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
I guess my point is, everyone processes this path differently. For me, having hope and more confidence than ever before that this is going to help us achieve our take-home baby is worth any trade off.
If I come across any more resources or links to share, I will be sure to post them! Keep us posted on your progress. Wishing you all the best!
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL! E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
Me 39 DH44
1st DE FET 5/16-BFN
2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP
8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
@laurad75- glad you are feeling excited about moving forward!! We are trying naturally too until we can retain a donor and there is nothing like a few months of natural failures (hopefully not of course!) to remind me why we are pursuing the path we are. I still get my hopes up each month that this will be our miracle since besides lower amh, there really isn't anything wrong except probably poor quality. I'll look for donor resources and share any I find. It will be good to have some others on here to share the experience with!!
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
@20T how was your wtf apt?? (((Hugs)))
Me 39 DH44
1st DE FET 5/16-BFN
2nd DE FET 7/18-BFP
8/17 Baby HR 140/min EDD 4/6/17
I'm also desperate to keep this thread alive.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
If we go the DE route, we are looking at frozen eggs for a variety of reasons. Our RE and Embryologist said they've worked with Fairfax Egg Bank in the past and have had good results, but I can't remember if you wanted to use fresh or frozen. I like the frozen route because it seems more anonymous and can be done when I'm ready as opposed to having to sync cycles, etc. But I haven't found a donor on there that I would be comfortable with yet.
I'm still really struggling with this decision and it doesn't help that my RE thinks we should do one more round with my OE because of my age (I'm 33). He said that if he'd have the results I've had with someone over 36, he'd recommend going directly to DE but that he was struggling because of my age. Thanks buddy....that non-answer is not helpful! I can't really wrap my head around not having my own biological child. I know it sounds really selfish, but I always imagined looking at my baby and seeing some piece of me or my family looking back at me. I don't really know how to give that up. My H just doesn't seem to understand that and keeps saying but it'll be your baby because you'll carry it and give birth to it. I found this article: https://blog.pved.org/2009/07/20/women-who-give-birth-to-donor-egg-babies-are-the-biological-moms/ but would like to see more of the research before believing it (although I really want to).
We've decided to take some time off (just a few months)for now, to heal and figure things out. This TTC/IF journey has taken over the last 2 years of our lives and I can't even remember what I like to do for fun. I feel like that'll be easier said then done though and I'm eager to maintain this thread to work all of these issues out with you all!
In regards to Frozen vs Fresh - I am waiting to hear back from our financial coordinator to confirm our insurance coverage. If my insurance covers anything for DE IVF it will only be for fresh eggs so we will go that route. Otherwise, we will likely do a guaranteed plan with frozen.
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
As far as agencies, I didn't look into any since my clinic (FCI in Chicago) has an in house donor base (with about 20 or so caucasin donors right now). Its cheaper to use their in house donor base since they are all screened and ready to go. You could look into traveling to a clinic with an in house donor base instead of using an agency. I know that CNY has an in house donor base and has veryyy cheap prices, though you don't get quite as many eggs, but it may be worth looking into if you are considering traveling.
@20T- we are on a little break right now (since our donors aren't available for a another month or two), and its really nice! Went on our first real vacation in a while! Now if only we could travel somewhere and not worry about Zika. I would definitely be on the beach somewhere
I was in a similar situation to you, where my RE said I could definitely try again with my own eggs, but it was also totally reasonable to move on to donor- Meaning it was completely up to us and she didn't really have a strong opinion. I think you probably knew we were planning to try one more time, but then I was delayed for 2 months with cysts and decided it was my body's message it was time to move on. Sometimes I wonder if I am moving on too fast, since I am only 29 and have only been trying 2 years. But then I think about how many tries we have had with TI, IUI, IVF and how we have NEVER had any pregnancy. So it makes me convinced there is something wrong with my eggs. We are currently trying naturally, and with each natural fail, it reminds me why I am going down this path. I don't think I will feel 100% confident in this path until I get my BFP. Then all doubts will melt away and that will be the child that is meant for me. Our thought was also that since we are young, if we are meant to have a genetic child, it will still happen someday in the next 10-15 years. But I can't live my life like this for the next 10 years trying. I would rather move on and hopefully be blessed with children from DE, and then have a miracle later if its meant to happen. Sorry for the novel.. but know that you aren't alone and I also have similar moments of doubt, worry and yet hopeful/excitement.
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog
Diagnosis: Mild Endo, DOR (AMH of 1.5), Poor Quality Eggs/embryos, Displaced Window of Implantation (ERA Post Receptive)
March-May 2016: 1 TI and 2 IUIs- BFN
June 2016- Laproscopy- found/removed mild endo and confirmed only 1 normal healthy ovary.
August 2016- IVF #1 with Antagonist Protocol- Cancelled (2 lead follies), converted to IUI- BFN
Oct-Nov 2016- IVF #2 with Estrogen Priming Micro Lupron Protocol, 2 eggs retrieved, day 3 transfer of 1- BFN
January 2017- New RE, IVF#3 with Estrogen Priming Antagonist Protocol, 12 eggs, 8 mature, 6 fertilized, 2 day 5 early blasts transferred (none to freeze ), BFN
May 2017- Sept 2017- Starting Donor Egg process! Waiting for donor to be available... and then she is pregnant at baseline
Oct 2017- Donor #2: 25R, 22M,18F, 12 blasts frozen! Fresh transfer cancelled due to thin lining with fluid
Nov 2017- Hysterscopy to remove polyp
Dec 2017- DE FET #1 on 12/8 on 2 perfect blasts- BFN and devastated
Jan-Mar 2018- ERA #1- Post receptive by 24 hours, ERA #2 RECEPTIVE with 4 days of Progesterone
Apr 2018- DE FET cancelled for lining issues
Jun 2018- DE FET #2 of two 1AA blasts- first BFP ever! Beta 10dp5dt- 378, Beta 14dp5dt- 2840, Beta 16dp5dt- 4035, beta 18dp5dt- 10916. Due on 2/20 with one baby after a vanishing twin
Baby Born born early @ 33.5 weeks due to Pre-e
Back for # 2!
2017 - egg retrieval #1 - 3 eggs, 0 embryos appropriate for transfer; ER #2 2 eggs, 0 embryos on day 3; ER #3 1 egg 0 embryos
moved to donor egg in summer 2017; 35 eggs retrieved; 19 fertilized; 9 total embryos
Fresh transfer Dec 2017= BFP! baby boy born 8/22/18
May 2019 - surprise natural pregnancy ended in MC
Nov 2019 FET; MC at 9 weeks
May 2020 FET; BFN
July 2020 FET; CP treated with methotrexate
Oct 2020 BFP!
Take a look at my blog