Ask a STM+ (aka the Stupid Questions Thread)

Myelhsa · March 2017

bluejeanbabi05 said:

So...it would be ridiculous if I walked into BRU to register at 12 weeks, right? Major flames?

I wouldn't flame you. BRU has some policy where depending on how much stuff is purchased off your registry, you get a gift card after your baby arrives. I would register for anything you plan on buying and do not buy it unless you purchase it off your registry. We got a gift card in the amount of almost $500 after my daughter was born because we didn't buy anything from BRU without putting it on her registry first (like, I even scanned clearance outfits before checking out).

I don't plan on having a baby shower for this LO, but I'm sure as hell registering.

canonmom413 · March 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 Perfectly acceptable! I have gone in twice already. Once to buy my stroller and car seat and the other to grab tri fold cloth diaper inserts - plain white cloth that I sew a cute patterned center on to use as burp cloths like this:

Edit: I've registered in target already

not fully but started it.

dogperson11 · March 2017

yasandson said:

Here's another one. Do you feel yourself tearing? Or are you focus on other sensations baby coming out makes you feel? I know this might sound silly.

Yes, I remember feeling the tearing. Actually, I remember expecting to tear towards my butt and was SHOCKED when I felt myself tear towards my clit.

carries2018 · March 2017

i mean it is a good thing obviously $$ wise. but i am so depressed there is nothing i need to register for this time. i have a passion for spending money i dont have.

carries2018 · March 2017

i do feel like we need a registry thread. there are so many things you don't need. and so many key staples that might go under your radar.

bluejeanbabi05 · March 2017

@carries2018 start it! Please!!!

carries2018 · March 2017

ouuuu i feel so special starting an important thread.

Image result for hair flip gif

Cythe · March 2017

Alright I have another dumb question.

My prenatal says the dose is 2 pills, 1 at lunch and 1 at dinner. I can just take them both before bed, yes? The fish burps are so lame.

beezeee · March 2017

@Cythe mine is 2 as well and I've always just taken them at the same time, before bed.

yenrec · March 2017

@yasandson just to second @jessafishy, I did not have any medications during my delivery, and the crowning was certainly the most painful part. However, mine was fairly quick. I pushed about 4-5 times, once the contractions came, and the second to last time was the worst. The ring of fire is a very real thing and there is nothing like it. I personally felt like that whole area was numb from the pressure, but I definitely felt the burn. Again, I didn't tear much, but it's hard to know exactly what happens when it actually happens unless you ask, or you have a severe tear.
Dont be scared, really! It all (usually) happens so fast.

ForwardnBackward · March 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 I say go for it. Pro Tip: if you register at BRU - try and get your big furniture stuff there (crib, recliner/glider, dresser, changing table) and put it on your registry because Registry Rewards kick back on those purchases is huge. Plus their normal rewards program if you buy it yourself is pretty good.

EVERYTHING GOES ON THE REGISTRY BEFORE PURCHASING

purplestarz · March 2017

ForwardnBackward said:

EVERYTHING GOES ON THE REGISTRY BEFORE PURCHASING

Ditto. DH loves those giant tubs of cheese balls there. We were there once and he was about to buy one...but not before I added it to the registry!

feeislove · March 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 I started my babylist registry before I was even pregnant :X

tyannej · March 2017

I know it's a little early for this but what did y'all do about swimwear in the summer? I live in Texas so by about May it's time to breakout the swimwear (typically). Do y'all have any pointers on what is a good idea to buy and what I should stay away from? I won't be huge, I don't think, I'll be anywhere from 17-29 weeks during the summer. I don't want to go overboard on spending money on a suit either.

dogperson11 · March 2017

tyannejohn said:

I know it's a little early for this but what did y'all do about swimwear in the summer? I live in Texas so by about May it's time to breakout the swimwear (typically). Do y'all have any pointers on what is a good idea to buy and what I should stay away from? I won't be huge, I don't think, I'll be anywhere from 17-29 weeks during the summer. I don't want to go overboard on spending money on a suit either.

Last time (DD was born end of August) I got a tankini and just went up a size for the top. Maternity suits are crazy expensive, IMO.

canonmom413 · March 2017

@tyannejohn this is a great question and I'm actually interested in the answer. I am a TTM, but both of my girls are spring babies which means at my biggest, it was winter of course spring.

baker1jm2 · March 2017

I also just bought a regular tankini from target and went a size up...I due in August and it fit until I delivered. I wore my regular bottoms that I already had

tyannej · March 2017

Oh okay perfect. Thanks for the input, I'm going to try that. I'm not real interested in spending $50 on a swimsuit that I may not ever wear after this summer.

beezeee · March 2017

@tyannejohn I also just wore a regular, non- maternity suit. IMO most of the maternity suits are not the cutest, and like you said, I didn't want to spend the money on one. I was actually able to wear my regular two piece, even at 9 months pregnant. However, my bump was totally on display, which I know is not everyone's preference.

grkgdss00 · March 2017

Question for other STM. How are you guys handling the bedroom situation? Will baby have their own room?
Baby will eventually be in current toddler's room, and even though baby will be in our room for first few months all the "stuff" is in toddler's room that I would need - dresser, rocking chair, crib, etc. I know eventually i'm going to need to dismantle the guest room and move her room in there, but sounds daunting for now. How are you guys managing this? We moved her in her own room around 3.5 months, but had access to all the stuff obviously. I'm nervous about not having access to things because toddler will be sleeping/napping etc. x-posted on "STM checkin" since not sure who reads this far down.

JessDG · March 2017

My sister in law was pregnant 2 summers ago, and gave me the suit she bought. It should work fine but it comes with a skirt, so I'll probably just get some bottoms to match since I'm not a fan of swim skirts. I'm SO thankful she had one so I didn't have to find something. It's pretty cute too. She said she had found it on sale somewhere so it is a maternity suit.

tyannej · March 2017

@beezeemarie well it's not that it's not my preference I've just seen other mom's being huge pregnant and they didn't take care of themselves as far as trying to prevent strechmarks and their swimsuits weren't big enough so there was stomach and boobs falling out everywhere and to be honest it was a little repulsive to me, and I'm not one to be terribly modest. But like you said if you had a regular 2 piece that fit throughout the whole pregnancy I might try that. (sorry if that seemed blunt) I just didn't know if a regular swimsuit would fit me as I grew because I don't know how big I'm going to get.

bluejeanbabi05 · March 2017

So stupid question here, but that is the name of the thread

Is there a particular reason besides modesty not to show off the bump in a well-fitting two piece?

Oh also @tyannejohn just FYI, there is no way to "prevent" stretch marks, it's all genetic. That's good news for those of us who aren't diligent about applying the coconut oil! Not that I won't do that too, because it can't hurt. But no need to judge other mamas stretch marks.

tyannej · March 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 I wasn't judging and I hope it didn't come off that way. I know I'll have them too I just don't know how comfortable I'll be wearing a swimsuit with them because this is my first time around, which is why I was wanting to get opinions.

bluejeanbabi05 · March 2017

@tyannejohn got it, just be careful about saying things like you're repulsed by someone else's stretch marks. If a woman feels comfortable showing them (and the life she is carrying/has carried) off, then I have all the respect for her.

eve87-2 · March 2017

Have any experienced moms ever drank chamomile and honey while pregnant? I am sick and coughing like crazy so I've had about 6-10 cups in 3 days but today I am not sure if the lower uterus pain is from coughing sooooo much or from drinking tea?? Anyone?

yasandson · April 2017

@Eve87 my obgyn told me to stay away from honey (unpasteurized). I have had a hard time finding pasteurized honey so i spent 17 days trying to fight a cold/flu... Without honey it was much tougher.

Hope you feel better soon

swanbrooner · April 2017

**Dirty Lurker from June**

I'm a FTM at 30.5 weeks. I've used an expensive, stretch mark "preventing" belly butter morning and night since about 12 weeks along with Vitamin E oil. Not that long ago, a few little red stretchies popped up. Now, my belly is practically covered in them...and I've only gained about 8 pounds so far.

I'll spare you my "repulsive" bikini picture from vacation this week, but I just wanted to share that my stretch mark prevention hasn't done much for me. It's helped with being itchy, but that's about it. Sorry, ladies!

joforyoga · April 2017

tyannejohn said:

I know it's a little early for this but what did y'all do about swimwear in the summer? I live in Texas so by about May it's time to breakout the swimwear (typically). Do y'all have any pointers on what is a good idea to buy and what I should stay away from? I won't be huge, I don't think, I'll be anywhere from 17-29 weeks during the summer. I don't want to go overboard on spending money on a suit either.

You may be able to wear your regular bikinis. When I was pregnant the first time I wore mostly my regular bikinis in the summer and just took out the padding in the tops because I didn't need it anymore :-) I do remember buying one or two new bikinis and just went up a size because my butt and my boobs were bigger.

JessDG · April 2017

Ok--new question! When do I need to look for a pediatrician? What happens with all that once the baby is born? Do you bring the baby in for a checkup a few days after they are born, or do they come to the hospital? I know you need to have someone lined up before birth, but wasn't sure how long before was typical.

canonmom413 · April 2017

JessDG said:

Ok--new question! When do I need to look for a pediatrician? What happens with all that once the baby is born? Do you bring the baby in for a checkup a few days after they are born, or do they come to the hospital? I know you need to have someone lined up before birth, but wasn't sure how long before was typical.

With DD1 I actually hadn't decided in time. At the hospital they gave me a list with the most popular chosen in my area picked one in hospital and then had first put of hospital visit at 3 days old due to jaundice recheck (Day after I got out of hospital). We had an official 1 week appt after that. Then a 1 month, 3 month, 6, 9, and 1 year. Then it was 18 months , 2, 3,4 and so on. We wound up liking our pedi and got lucky. I do wish I was more prepared.

joforyoga · April 2017

JessDG said:

Ok--new question! When do I need to look for a pediatrician? What happens with all that once the baby is born? Do you bring the baby in for a checkup a few days after they are born, or do they come to the hospital? I know you need to have someone lined up before birth, but wasn't sure how long before was typical.

I'm not sure where you're located, in the states or in Canada? I had midwives with my first pregnancy and have them again with this pregnancy so in my experience the midwives do all of your follow up care after the babies born. They come to your house for home visit so you don't even have to leave the house which is amazing! After that I do remember them recommending when I needed to take my son to her family doctor I just don't remember exactly when that was. I don't think I took him in to our doctor until he needed his first set of shots to be honest. We just use our regular family doctor. I was told that paediatrician clinics are more so for specialty cases but otherwise you would just take your baby to family doctor .

JessDG · April 2017

I am in the states!

yenrec · April 2017

@JessDG you'll need to decide first if you want a pediatrician or a family doctor. My daughter has gone to our family doctor since day 1 and I'm perfectly happy with her! I went to a pediatrician when she turned 1 and then went back to my family doctor because it was no different-in my particular experience.
The answer is yes you'll need one chosen before you deliver to ensure they have openings for new patients. Also my doctor was not the same network as the hospital, so the on-staff pedi checked baby out before we were discharged. Then we went to see our family doctor when she was 2 days old. I think the hospitals want you to be seen by your pedi or doctor within the first 48 hours.
Anyways just call the doctor you want to have maybe in May or June and tell them you'd like to get signed up for around when baby is expected. Then when you deliver, you can call for a specific appointment. They'll get you in asap with a newborn :-)

curlyq423 · April 2017

We chose our pediatrician a few weeks before delivering (I think?). We had notified the hospital we delivered at and they called the peds office once our son was delivered. Someone from the office would visit each day until discharged. Then We went in 3 or 4 days later for a weight check with the nurse. Then maybe a week later we had our first MD visit.

Due to insurance changes, we had to find a new pediatriciana couple years ago. We found an awesome one and just told her last week we have two more on the way. She is taking new patients but said they no longer make hospital visits. She said the neonatologists will see the babies at the hospital then a few days after we get home we will go into her office.

jessafishy · April 2017

My OB office gave me a list of the local pediatricians when I was in my third trimester. We picked one and they made a notation so I didn't have to think about it after the birth.

Side note: I absolutely love my pedi. She had just gotten off of maternity leave when I delivered and I felt she had a unique perspective on everything I was dealing with because she was in a similar place in life.

bluejeanbabi05 · April 2017

I'm wondering about pros and cons of a separate changing table vs. a dresser with a changing table set up on top. The set we're looking at has a "topper" built in for a changing station. Also, there aren't any rails on it. For some reason I've been thinking rails are a necessity for a changing station. Are they?

curlyq423 · April 2017

We just put a changing pad on top of a dresser. We actually used it a lot. Once our son got too big and squirmy to lay still, we just changed him on the floor. It worked for us! We will probably do the same thing this time around.

yenrec · April 2017

@bluejeanbabi05 the changing table aspect is so different from mama to mama! Some mamas use it for the first few months of life and then diaper changing becomes a mobile event, located to wherever the child will remain cooperative :-) for myself, I'm still changing DD on the changing table at 18 months. I think it's because I've never let her know anything different, so it's become easy for us as a routine? Who knows! She has a few toys and books up there to keep her busy while I'm changing her. It's not always easy, though, so for us the dresser with built-in spot for changing (I.e. With sides) is what works for us. About 4-5 months when they begin realizing they can roll and squirm is when the sides and buckles come in handy :-) I would suggest that if you go with the dresser with no sides to hold the pad in place, you should obv always use the buckles! The picture is almost exactly what we use. I keep diapers in the door and her clothes in the drawers.

JessDG · April 2017

Thanks everyone! I will ask my OB and some friends who are new moms for recommendations and get that set up over the summer!

Edited because complete sentences

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