AFM, 8DPO and BFN. I know I'm out -- I can feel it, and my temps are dropping. Devastated doesn't begin to describe it. I don't know how I'm supposed to go about my day at work like everything is normal when I feel like I'm screaming inside.
@reneeannemm Tell yourself its OKAY to be optimistically hopeful! I am using positive intentions in my everyday life and it is making a difference. I am so happy for you. This is a happy time, so be happy girl!
Thank you, everyone. I'm feeling OK right now, so I'll take that and run. There's nothing I can do either way, so I'm choosing to hope.
Renee, 34 + Devon, 29 married 08/13 TTC 09/15 *TW Loss mentioned* BFP 12/15/15 EDD: 08/26/16 MMC discovered 1/25/16 at 9 +3 TTCAL 3/2016 Acupuncture 11/16 Dx December 2016: unexplained January 2017: 50 mg Clomid + TI = BFP #2 01/30/17 Please be a sticky baby! EDD: 10/15/17 Measuring ahead! 10/12/17 Ambrose born on his due date!
@reneeannemm Girl! I just caught up on your posts in the last couple minutes. I am so immensely happy for you. I was going to also suggest an FRER but others so wisely beat me to it! I also had what I thought was a fake-out wondfo with this last BFP, so I came rushing to say to not count yourself out! Congratulations! This has been such a long journey for you and I'm so excited for you!
@migdala Don't count yourself out yet. Check the box. This was my BFP chart in Nov. Now granted, I never had progesterone checked and I did have a MC at 8w, but still...
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
Hi all! I don't think I've intro'd here yet, but I've been reading and participating in some of the threads and really appreciate this community and all the support it's given me over the past month since my first loss.
Brief Intro:
*TW: LC Mentioned* I have one 17-month-old son, so this was my second pregnancy. *End TW*
We were thrilled to be pregnant again but I felt a bit off from the beginning and just sensed something was wrong but tried to brush those feelings off. I ended up having a CP/MC at 4w6d. It's been a difficult month, but each day gets easier and knowing others have been through the same and we're all in this together (though I wish none of us had to experience this!) helps.
I'm joining you all in the TWW now as I wait for my first AF after MC to arrive. I've been charting and ended up ovulating right on schedule after my CP which was encouraging, even if we aren't TTC yet. Now I'm anxiously awaiting for AF to arrive because I'm PMSing like crazy today!
Thought I'd share this video for anyone who hasn't seen it yet. It totally mimics how I'm feeling throughout each month's cycle and I'm sure many of you can relate! https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cpa-xenqYbo
Wishing you all the best this month! I'll be joining you in TTC again come June, but for now am just continuing to temp/chart.
Welcome @jen83mn. I'm sorry about your loss. That's sounds just like my 1/9 loss. I just knew from the get go that something was off. I tried to brush the feeling aside but ended up losing it at 5w. Out of curiosity, why are you benched until June?
Thank you ... it's been a rough month, but gets easier as time goes by and I have more hope!
My doctor recommended waiting one cycle before TTC again, so technically we could try again this next cycle, but we're choosing to wait until June for other reasons ... originally we had planned to start trying in June (*TW: LC Mentioned: So our son and the baby would be 2.5-3 years apart *End TW*), but then I got too anxious and excited and decided to start trying sooner. After the loss, I just felt like maybe it wasn't the right timing and sticking to our original plan was better for us and our situation right now. This year has been a rough one financially with home improvement issues coming up, so it will give us more time to save some money and get a few more small household projects done (I would like to get my painting projects done before getting pregnant again).
The reason we chose June to start TTC is we'd prefer not to have a winter baby here in MN ... the winters are really long, cold/flu season is horrible here, and the thought of being trapped inside the house all winter on maternity leave would make things a lot harder. Not to mention almost every single person in our families has winter birthdays and it's birthday celebration overload, so I'm not anxious to add to that. Totally minor and petty issues in the grand scheme of things, but I think it just makes sense for us to go back to our original plan and give myself some time to recover emotionally before we start trying again, since we do have the choice. It will be hard to wait, but we also have tons to keep us busy in the meantime and I know the time will go by fast!
@NYTino24 Thanks for the encouragement, but I just know I'm out. I somehow kind of knew I was PG before I got my BFP last time around, and that feeling is just not there. I'm sure whenever it does happen it'll be with a chart that is all over the place though, just to throw me off!
BFN this morning at 9 DPO. I booked a massage for Saturday as a condolence prize. Next month is my EDD and like an idiot I agreed to speak at a conference the day before. This is going to be a rough few weeks. I wish I could just hibernate until next O time.
Sorry for the BFNs @migdala. Enjoy your massage! H said he'd get me a massage as a Christmas gift, but we just haven't booked it yet. If I get a BFN this cycle, I know what I'm doing next weekend....
@jen83mn Welcome. We're pretty lax around here, so feel free to post wherever you feel comfortable. I was on the bench for 6 months, but still chimed in on WTO and TWW where I felt I could contribute. I hope your bench time brings you to a better place emotionally.
AFM: 7 or 8 DPO, depending on which detector I use in FF. I was doing OK anxiety-wise until 6 DPO, but since then I've found myself staring at my chart like it contains the answers to life, the universe, and everything. I'm trying to hold out until Saturday when I can trust the results more (skipping the Wondfos this time and going straight to FRER in the hopes that my desire to not just pee my money away will help with self control). I'm feeling the itch to test Friday though. It's an internal battle - is it better to be in a horrible mood on Friday or Saturday if it's a BFN?
Edit: I'm not feeling overly optimistic. I don't have many symptoms to spot, and feel totally normal.
@migdala - Ugh im sorry for another BFN. After last cycle's BFN I just wanted to fast forward to O time again too. Enjoy your massage!
@Riversong15 - Fx for you this cycle! Its always my internal dilemma of when to test. Test on a work day morning and then have to work/function all day being down or ruin your weekend with a BFN. I guess we could both think positively and plan for BFPs but that's hard. lol GL with whatever you decide to do and Im pulling for you this cycle!
@riversong15 we are like the same person right now! I am 7dpo according to ff, but 8dpo according to this other app I use, and am having an internal battle on when to start testing. Struggle is real!!
@Uhlease13 Cycle buddy! Yes, it really is an internal battle. I usually cave when I feel myself getting too hopeful. We'll see how much willpower I can exercise on Friday morning. GL to you this cycle!
I just started lightly spotting yesterday and today which should mean AF should be here soon. We were NTNP in Jan but with the progesterone test in Feb I will have to use OPKs so we can get it done on the right day. I guess then we might as well try more accurate BDing this month. I just feel like deep down my Progesterone must be low otherwise why is it taking so long? Not counting December because that's when I found out I was PG - Feb will by our 8th month TTC. I just get down thinking that its taking so long. I was working on letting go of everything in Jan. but now I realize I don't want to let go of having another baby. So 1 step at a time......
Well I'm 9DPO and just returned from target where I bought FRER. So I had to do it but wish I hadn't of course it was a BFN. So I'm pretty sure I'm out. This past cycle was 27 days and I'm now at 22 so pretty sure this isn't it for us
So I stated spotting over a week early for AF this month in the tww. AF went on for 4 days but I felt very off the entire time. I was dizzy and had nausea. These were the same symptoms I had for both my bfps. I started freaking out that I was having another ectopic. POAS yesterday at lunch- faint positive. Called my dr and was scheduled to come in that afternoon. 3 hours later I had excritutiating cramps so I thought my tube was bursting. Went to obgyn (at the hospital knowing it would be quicker than ER) and on the way passed 4 very large clots. The pain stopped with a few minute afterwards. Because the pain stopped the dr surmised it was a chemical pregnancy. Just waiting for hcg results to confirm. I knew my uterine lining wasn't strong enough and I feel guilty that this happened. Oddly I am not devastated. I was so afraid for fear of an exploding ectopic that I don't really think I've processed what happened yet.
Im still waiting to hear from the ob about my blood test. I'm hoping that maybe it was a false negative and the pain was just normal cramps. I'm also a little perplexed why they didn't to an ultrasound to check for free fluid considering my last ectopic was a cornual ectopic and one of the most dangerous. I still can't convince myself it's NOT an ectopic. Anyhow I'm absolutely terrified of getting pg again after 3 consecutive losses. Feeling down right now and I am usually a pretty positive, albeit somewhat snarky person.
@justsuzie Hugs girl. I am so sorry this is happening to you : ( I think I would push for that ultrasound just to be sure. Please take care of yourself.
@RiverSong15 The struggle is real. FX that this is your cycle.
oh gawd I'm sorry @justsuzie - I know with my OB I already asked her but only after 2 losses do they do more testing to see what's going on. You might want to ask.
@justsuzie I'm so so sorry you're going through this. I'd push for an ultrasound just to make sure. I want to emphasize though that this is NOT your fault. Most MCs are chromosomal abnormalities, which are out of your control. Even though this pregnancy was sooner than your OB wanted, she told you a couple weeks ago that it could be fine. A lot of the recommendations in place are conservative. And I've never heard of lining issues being a problem after ectopics, so I doubt that's what's going on here. This is not your fault. Biggest hugs.
I am officially BSC. I had a huge temp drop for one day 2 days ago and now am having light spotting. I obviously pregnant with a bazillion babies. Why do our brains play games with us
Me: 32 DH: 36 Married 5/08 BFP #1: 1/27/13 DS #1 born 10/16/13 BFP #2: 1/20/16, ectopic discovered 1/23/16 Surgery 1/23/16 to remove ruptured tube TTCAL 3/16 BFP #3: 3/24/17 EDD 12/5/17 DS #2 born 12/11/17
@justsuzie I am so sorry you are going through this! I would push for an ultrasound and repeated loss panel of bloodwork. Keep us updated.
It's funny how it's the little things in life that mean the most...not where you live, or what you drive, or the price tag on your clothes... There's no dollar sign on a piece of mind, this I've come to know! *ZBB*
I am going in tomorrow morning for an ultra sound and second bloodwork. I took all of your advice and said I would go to the ER if they wouldn't see me. You guys gave the courage to speak up.
Good news is my hpt from 10 minutes ago is barely visible so at least I have that. DH is at school until 10:30 tonight so I'm just watching 13 going on 30. My feel good movie.
Really thank you tou ladies. It means a lot. I'm not just saying that either. I'm going to talk to DH about going right back to our plan of ttc after this next cycle. I think I need one month on the bench to regroup and gain some perspective.
Well we need to balance my shitty news with another bfp. FX for your all. I'll be lurking!
Re: ***January TWW***
Me.30 DH.31
BFP 2/3/17...edd 10/13/17
AFM, 8DPO and BFN. I know I'm out -- I can feel it, and my temps are dropping. Devastated doesn't begin to describe it. I don't know how I'm supposed to go about my day at work like everything is normal when I feel like I'm screaming inside.
@migdala I'm so sorry. FX it's a bit too early.
CP 1/25/16 4.5 weeks, developed Graves' disease
Me: 36 DH:35
Married: 7/10/2016
TTC#1 - May 2016
BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016
BFP 5/5/2017 - CP
IVF #1 - June 2017 - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo. 7/9 Beta #1 - 161
TTC 09/15
*TW Loss mentioned*
BFP 12/15/15 EDD: 08/26/16
MMC discovered 1/25/16 at 9 +3
TTCAL 3/2016
Acupuncture 11/16
Dx December 2016: unexplained
January 2017: 50 mg Clomid + TI =
BFP #2 01/30/17 Please be a sticky baby!
EDD: 10/15/17 Measuring ahead! 10/12/17
Ambrose born on his due date!
Married 5/08
BFP #1: 1/27/13 DS #1 born 10/16/13
BFP #2: 1/20/16, ectopic discovered 1/23/16
Surgery 1/23/16 to remove ruptured tube
TTCAL 3/16
BFP #3: 3/24/17 EDD 12/5/17
DS #2 born 12/11/17
@reneeannemm Girl! I just caught up on your posts in the last couple minutes. I am so immensely happy for you. I was going to also suggest an FRER but others so wisely beat me to it! I also had what I thought was a fake-out wondfo with this last BFP, so I came rushing to say to not count yourself out! Congratulations! This has been such a long journey for you and I'm so excited for you!
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
@reneeannemm AHhhhhhh! Congratulations!!!! I am SO thrilled for you! Best wishes!!!!!
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
Brief Intro:
*TW: LC Mentioned*
I have one 17-month-old son, so this was my second pregnancy.
*End TW*
We were thrilled to be pregnant again but I felt a bit off from the beginning and just sensed something was wrong but tried to brush those feelings off. I ended up having a CP/MC at 4w6d. It's been a difficult month, but each day gets easier and knowing others have been through the same and we're all in this together (though I wish none of us had to experience this!) helps.
I'm joining you all in the TWW now as I wait for my first AF after MC to arrive. I've been charting and ended up ovulating right on schedule after my CP which was encouraging, even if we aren't TTC yet. Now I'm anxiously awaiting for AF to arrive because I'm PMSing like crazy today!
Thought I'd share this video for anyone who hasn't seen it yet. It totally mimics how I'm feeling throughout each month's cycle and I'm sure many of you can relate!
Wishing you all the best this month! I'll be joining you in TTC again come June, but for now am just continuing to temp/chart.
Thank you ... it's been a rough month, but gets easier as time goes by and I have more hope!
My doctor recommended waiting one cycle before TTC again, so technically we could try again this next cycle, but we're choosing to wait until June for other reasons ... originally we had planned to start trying in June (*TW: LC Mentioned: So our son and the baby would be 2.5-3 years apart *End TW*), but then I got too anxious and excited and decided to start trying sooner. After the loss, I just felt like maybe it wasn't the right timing and sticking to our original plan was better for us and our situation right now. This year has been a rough one financially with home improvement issues coming up, so it will give us more time to save some money and get a few more small household projects done (I would like to get my painting projects done before getting pregnant again).
The reason we chose June to start TTC is we'd prefer not to have a winter baby here in MN ... the winters are really long, cold/flu season is horrible here, and the thought of being trapped inside the house all winter on maternity leave would make things a lot harder. Not to mention almost every single person in our families has winter birthdays and it's birthday celebration overload, so I'm not anxious to add to that. Totally minor and petty issues in the grand scheme of things, but I think it just makes sense for us to go back to our original plan and give myself some time to recover emotionally before we start trying again, since we do have the choice. It will be hard to wait, but we also have tons to keep us busy in the meantime and I know the time will go by fast!
BFN this morning at 9 DPO. I booked a massage for Saturday as a condolence prize. Next month is my EDD and like an idiot I agreed to speak at a conference the day before. This is going to be a rough few weeks. I wish I could just hibernate until next O time.
@jen83mn Welcome. We're pretty lax around here, so feel free to post wherever you feel comfortable. I was on the bench for 6 months, but still chimed in on WTO and TWW where I felt I could contribute. I hope your bench time brings you to a better place emotionally.
AFM: 7 or 8 DPO, depending on which detector I use in FF. I was doing OK anxiety-wise until 6 DPO, but since then I've found myself staring at my chart like it contains the answers to life, the universe, and everything. I'm trying to hold out until Saturday when I can trust the results more (skipping the Wondfos this time and going straight to FRER in the hopes that my desire to not just pee my money away will help with self control). I'm feeling the itch to test Friday though. It's an internal battle - is it better to be in a horrible mood on Friday or Saturday if it's a BFN?
Edit: I'm not feeling overly optimistic. I don't have many symptoms to spot, and feel totally normal.
@Riversong15 - Fx for you this cycle! Its always my internal dilemma of when to test. Test on a work day morning and then have to work/function all day being down or ruin your weekend with a BFN. I guess we could both think positively and plan for BFPs but that's hard. lol GL with whatever you decide to do and Im pulling for you this cycle!
@riversong15 we are like the same person right now! I am 7dpo according to ff, but 8dpo according to this other app I use, and am having an internal battle on when to start testing. Struggle is real!!
Me.30 DH.31
BFP 2/3/17...edd 10/13/17
So I stated spotting over a week early for AF this month in the tww. AF went on for 4 days but I felt very off the entire time. I was dizzy and had nausea. These were the same symptoms I had for both my bfps. I started freaking out that I was having another ectopic. POAS yesterday at lunch- faint positive. Called my dr and was scheduled to come in that afternoon. 3 hours later I had excritutiating cramps so I thought my tube was bursting. Went to obgyn (at the hospital knowing it would be quicker than ER) and on the way passed 4 very large clots. The pain stopped with a few minute afterwards. Because the pain stopped the dr surmised it was a chemical pregnancy. Just waiting for hcg results to confirm. I knew my uterine lining wasn't strong enough and I feel guilty that this happened. Oddly I am not devastated. I was so afraid for fear of an exploding ectopic that I don't really think I've processed what happened yet.
Im still waiting to hear from the ob about my blood test. I'm hoping that maybe it was a false negative and the pain was just normal cramps. I'm also a little perplexed why they didn't to an ultrasound to check for free fluid considering my last ectopic was a cornual ectopic and one of the most dangerous. I still can't convince myself it's NOT an ectopic. Anyhow I'm absolutely terrified of getting pg again after 3 consecutive losses. Feeling down right now and I am usually a pretty positive, albeit somewhat snarky person.
@RiverSong15 The struggle is real. FX that this is your cycle.
Sorry for the BFNs today
@jen83mn Sorry you are here, but welcome.
Me: 36 DH:35
Married: 7/10/2016
TTC#1 - May 2016
BFP 9/6/2016 - Missed MC 10/20/2016
BFP 5/5/2017 - CP
IVF #1 - June 2017 - Transferred 1 fresh 4 AA embryo. 7/9 Beta #1 - 161
Married 5/08
BFP #1: 1/27/13 DS #1 born 10/16/13
BFP #2: 1/20/16, ectopic discovered 1/23/16
Surgery 1/23/16 to remove ruptured tube
TTCAL 3/16
BFP #3: 3/24/17 EDD 12/5/17
DS #2 born 12/11/17
TTC 9/2016 BFP 12/9/16 EDD 8/21/17 NMC 1/8/16 at 7w6d
TTC 2/2017 BFP 3/6/17 EDD 11/17/17 DS born 11/25/17 via ECS
TTC 12/2018 BFP 6/2/19 EDD 2/12/20 NMC / BO at 7 weeks, low progesterone
TTC 7/2019 BFP 8/21/19 EDD 4/22/20 CP at 5 weeks
TTC 8/19 IUI #1 w/ Clomid + Ovidrel + progesterone BFN, IUI 2 and 3 w/ Letrozole + Ovidrel + progesterone,
IUI 4 Follistim + Ovidrel + progesterone BFP 1/9/20 EDD 9/18/20
AMA, ITP in pregnancy, vWD type II - low Factor VIII, unexplained RPL and secondary infertility
@Taggarab sigh, I know the feeling
Me.30 DH.31
BFP 2/3/17...edd 10/13/17
Good news is my hpt from 10 minutes ago is barely visible so at least I have that. DH is at school until 10:30 tonight so I'm just watching 13 going on 30. My feel good movie.
Really thank you tou ladies. It means a lot. I'm not just saying that either. I'm going to talk to DH about going right back to our plan of ttc after this next cycle. I think I need one month on the bench to regroup and gain some perspective.
Well we need to balance my shitty news with another bfp. FX for your all. I'll be lurking!
Married 7/13
TTC #1 since 10/13
BFP 2/4/15, MC twin boys at 18w3d 5/15
IUI #1 2/25/16