Ack. I just got home from the eye doctor. I rubbed my eyes as I was getting into bed last night, and it felt like something got in my eye. It hurt to close my lids. I was in the bathroom searching for an hour. I tried flushing my eye with solution. I tried holding my eye under the faucet (which was disturbing feeling). I couldn't get anything out. I finally decided to try to sleep, which took forever because it just hurt to have my eyes closed. It was still feeling scratchy this morning, so I made an appt to check things out. I was worried maybe my cornea was scratched, and that's why it hurt. Low and behold, there was a "small, brown foreign object" in my eye that she only found once she flipped my eyelid up (which was horrific). It felt better immediately, thank god. I'm glad I got it checked out before it had time to do any damage. But now I'm just so tired and want a nap, and it's only 11am.
So this might be more for a TMI board, but I didn't see one (not since the last one, but I could have missed it). Anyway, having some swelling and pain in my lady parts (haha sorry) aka labia for adults out there. I'm thinking it might be one of those cyst from blockage; pretty sure I had one years ago, but not as bad. Going to the doctor today and hoping I just get antibiotics and told do have warm baths and compresses. I feel like the whole trying to drain it thing will suck! Anyone else experience something like this? It's super uncomfortable!!
Edit: totally missed the TMI board and it's right under this one
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I am in the same boat as many of you and not feeling as involved with this pregnancy. I think part of that is because this is my second and I am too busy, but also I don't really know how I felt at 17 weeks last time. I think most of my memories that stuck were from later in the pregnancy when the baby had a foot sticking out my side and it was not possible to forget I was pregnant. Also we delayed telling people this time, so it was not a constant topic of conversation until recently. I anticipate I will hit the halfway point and freak out about how much I have to do.
Sorry everyone dealing with insurance issues and scheduling drama. That is a life suck.
@livin541 - you might still be ok! Before I got mine done, the nurse at my dr's office mentioned that I would likely get a bill that showed that it was declined, but not to pay anything because it would still get worked out. It sounded like it meant the lab and the doctor's office had some kind of arrangement. Hope it works out!
I've been sick since Sunday, and haven't really been able to keep much food down. Our office always has a ton of vendors that bring in food, and today is no exception. My office is directly across from the break room and the smells are KILLING me. Stupid delicious brisket tacos!! Don't smell the way that you do!!
@babymc517 I had horrible swelling one time after sex. Like the size of a golf ball swelling. (Tmi. It basically looked like a nut. Funny in hind sight but believe me, not at the time) It was a bacterial infection that got super irritated from sex. Warm wash cloth, but not hot, definitely helped that night and I was given antibiotics from the doctor. The swelling decreased quickly after keeping a wash cloth on it
eta. I has zero other symptoms other than that.
TTC1: May 2015
Primary IF May 2016; Failed HSG; Scheduled Lap Sept. 2016
Ugh ugh ugh to the insurance issues! I had crappy insurance for years and was constantly getting burned by it. My $3000 IUD that they confirmed multiple times was 100% covered? Not covered! Just so many issues. I think Dr's hate me now because I'm so paranoid that I ask multiple times and make them put stuff in writing.
@livin541 We had something similar happen during my daughters pregnancy and it worked out fine. We chose to do the panorama test, which was not covered by my insurance. The company and my OB had a deal worked out though and said it would only cost us $25 out of pocket. A while later I got a check in the mail for $5000 something and was so confused. Basically, the company still bills the office whatever and then I had to mail in the check from them to the actual company myself since it wasn't through insurance. It was super weird. but in the end I still only had to pay $25 of our own money.
@sarah0985 thanks for the response! It's not quite that big (yet? haha). Ugh it is just the most uncomfortable thing to have! Sore to touch, but other than that no other symptoms besides the swelling. I'm thinking everything you had to do is what I'll end up having to do.
Now if I could just get rid of this head cold I'll feel so much better!
ETA: small (feels huge to me!) infected abscess...antibiotics and sitz baths...good news is it's not that big and the antibiotics should help with the sinus issues! Boom! 2 for 1 haha
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
You guys are making me feel much better, thanks much for the shared experiences. Hopefully we can get it all straightened out during our appointment tomorrow.
Speaking of insurance, has anyone ever switched insurance companies in the middle of pregnancy? I may be getting a new job early next year and would then be switching... Although that's not a major deciding factor, wondering how much of a pain in the ass it'll be.
You guys are making me feel much better, thanks much for the shared experiences. Hopefully we can get it all straightened out during our appointment tomorrow.
Speaking of insurance, has anyone ever switched insurance companies in the middle of pregnancy? I may be getting a new job early next year and would then be switching... Although that's not a major deciding factor, wondering how much of a pain in the ass it'll be.
I haven't changed insurance but I have moved to a different state mid pregnancy. Trying to minimize the time lapse between appointments and setting up records transfers early was key (and also a headache) so I would suggest eyeing if your potential new plans are accepted at the same practice and hospital.
@livin541 I haven't experienced it yet, but our insurance through my husband's work is changing at the first of the year. I think it should be okay, because my deductible would have started over anyway and there won't be any lapse in coverage. I think the biggest thing to check would be whether or not your OB and hospital accept the new insurance.
Random question, as im leaving the OB. Is anyone else experiencing hair loss? I'm losing it by the handful. The only time I've ever had this was after DS was born. My doctor keeps saying hair loss is cyclical and there's no reason for concern....and yet - concerned!!!
@ChristinaWild I was losing hair by the handfuls from probably 6 weeks til about 12 or 13 weeks and it kinda stopped. I wondered if it was the progesterone I was on from the RE but who knows. Maybe it was just cyclical.
Does anyone else feel guilty for taking their FMLA? I work for a small company and I want my whole 12 weeks. They have been so accommodating but today we had our "vacation picking" meeting and due to my FMLA they have the entire summer blocked off where none of them can take vacation. I feel terrible about it but apparently not terrible enough that I change from 12 weeks requested maternity leave to 6. Just wondering if anyone else feels guilty for placing partners or co workers in an unfortunate situation while you are off?
@rkstro2 I would probably feel that way if I were in your position. I am a guilty person by nature though. However I don't think it should make you consider shortening your leave! That baby is only little once.
@rkstro2 I feel guilty too. I am part of a small team (2.5 people) and last pregnancy I didn't qualify for FMLA so I was only gone 6 weeks. This time I will be gone the full 12. I'm sorry your leave means your team can't take vacation all summer, but you shouldn't give up that time.
Ok stupid question time! For those that use coconut oil as a moisturizer are you talking straight up cooking-grade coconut oil? My skin is absurdly dry and itchy and I'm about to give it a shot. Just don't want to do anything really silly!
@ShadeofGreen816 and @Louise_Belcher thanks for the support! I am guilty by nature too. I feel so bad when I am putting someone else out. I am hopeful that they will end up hiring a locum tenens to replace me while on FMLA so a few people can have off. However, I do know that if most of those men in my group were eligible for a 12 week time off for some reason they wouldn't feel guilty about taking the whole thing. And fwiw most of them have been very supportive and haven't complained at all...just one has had had a little sour grapes.
@ShadeofGreen816 word of caution with coconut oil. It is awesome! But some people get super dried out by it. If this happens, there are other oils out there that aren't quite as known to do this.
Ok stupid question time! For those that use coconut oil as a moisturizer are you talking straight up cooking-grade coconut oil? My skin is absurdly dry and itchy and I'm about to give it a shot. Just don't want to do anything really silly!
I haven't tried this personally yet, but yes. You just use straight up coconut oil that you could buy at a grocery store.
@ShadeofGreen816 I use simply balanced coconut oil as moisturizer from Target. You can use it to cook with as well. I put it on right after I shower, before I dry off. And I only pat dry instead of rubbing because you're really supposed to just let it dry but I don't have time for that in the mornings lol
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
@rkstro2 I think I should feel bad but I don't. I don't have a small company that I work for like you, but I am a therapist so people have to cover my cases and see them while I'm out. I feel worse for my clients for having to change therapists and not my coworkers. I just found out I can request up to 1 year off, but I highly doubt I'll get thebapproval. Wouldn't that be nice.
Don't feel bad about taking FMLA. Your company should be the one that "feels bad." The US is crap for maternity and its sucks for employees and employers. I'll be out for 18-20 weeks of leave. I'm on a 3 person team. My company is hiring a contractor to cover my leave. It sucks, but you are entitled to that time with your baby.
@ShadeofGreen816 I use organic cooking oil from the baking isle of the store. However I don't like how oily I feel so I've also been switching with a cocoa butter by I think vasoline... or a body cream from bath and body works.
Unfortunately I lathered myself in coconut oil daily from head to toe with my first and I still ended up with stretch marks all over. So i believe it's true when they say its genetics. But it totally helps with the itchy skin.
@ShadeofGreen816 coconut oil totally dries me out! Just to back up what @absbubbs said. I love argan oil though!
So weird about Magnolia Grace. I have been thinking about this name a lot lately but our last name is McDowell so too much M sound? I'm still thinking on it.
For team green moms in prior pregnancies,any regrets on waiting? I'm seriously contemplating waiting for birth to learn the sex. I can't decide if the anticipation will be a killer or super exciting.
@clebl24 No team green regrets here. I loved it. We are finding out this time simply because we have so much "girl" stuff and because I thought it might be cool to try it both ways.
@BeachMommy2B Stretch marks are totally genetic! This should probably be FFFC but I use plain Aveeno lotion (no difference than non pregnancy days) and don't have a single stretch mark from either of my babies #lucky
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I don't think anyone should feel bad about taking time off! You work hard and it's part of your benefits! And your baby is only little for so long, enjoy every minute of it!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@chickyclg I'm in the same boat with second pregnancy syndrome...I think I just spend so much time focused on DD that it just doesn't feel the same. *TW* It's probably a blessing in disguise because I spent 99% of my pregnancy with DD worried that I would suffer a second loss.
@ShadeofGreen816 yes to your question about coconut oil. But I get mine from the skin care aisle at Sprouts. I also mix a combo of coconut oil, cocoa butter, shea butter and avocado oil. Rubbed this all over the "expanding" parts first pregnancy and didn't get any stretch marks. Both my mom and sister did get them with their pregnancies...so I guess I got lucky? Knocking on wood I get lucky again this round.
@rkstro2 please don't feel bad about taking as much time off as you can from work to be with your baby. Like you said, if they were in your shoes, they wouldn't hesitate. The first few months is such a special time and unfortunately we can't turn back time. I'm alotted 4 weeks prior to delivery and 12-14 weeks after (depending on type of delivery) but I'm hoping I can stretch it out to the max of 6 months after delivery that some have been able to do.
@rkstro2 I second that if anyone should feel bad about you taking time off, it's your company for not hiring a contractor to cover your position. It sucks that a company would put someone in that spot - it's almost like they're guilting you into staying.
I'm a little nervous to take time off because I'll be working on a huge 14 month long project that kicks off in February, and I plan to be out all summer. Being with my newborn is so much more important to me in the long run, though. I just hope no one makes stupid decisions on my project when I'm gone.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
@clebl24 Zero regrets. DH was the first to know (minutes after delivery - the L&D nurse had to nudge him to check because we were so overcome by LO's arrival after a long labor). Awesome but not required. I was happier with neutral baby gear in the beginning (now DD is obsessed with pink - love it ). So far, we're team green with these babies but I'm not sure if DH will cave at the anatomy scan. I don't feel strongly either way.
Im not going to feel bad for staying home unpaid, overtired, and covered in someone else's bodily fluids while my nipples threaten to secede from my body. Think it's a vacation, coworkers? I'll trade you. No questions asked. Enjoy my newborn.
Also zero regrets about being team green. I had my A/S yesterday and will begin monthly ultrasounds, the technician annotated the record that we do not want to know the sex so that no one will show us or say anything accidently.
@clebl24, we were team green the first time around. I have no regrets at all. Especially for our first, it was nice to get all gender neutral big gear. It was also exciting to find out from DH right after she was delivered. We are finding out at the anatomy scan this time around, and I'm excited about that too. It'll be really fun to tell DD and our families at Christmas.
May Siggy Challenge: Labor Memes
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10 DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI) BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
So, with all of the different responses to coconut oil it sounds like it really depends on your preference and skin! I have super sensitive skin so I have to be careful with what I try, and I was nervous to try the coconut oil, but for me it works. I can't use Palmers cocoa butter lotion, it makes me itch like crazy!!
As for FMLA, I don't think any of us should feel bad! I think it is totally natural to feel a little guilt about leaving, especially if you work in a small business, but being at home with your newborn is a bit more important and they can get over it! I don't think I can take the full 12 weeks due to not being paid for 5 of them, but if we could afford it I would! I can, however, spread out the remaining weeks if I want over the year. So, I can use it for doctor's appointments or if I just want to take Fridays or Mondays off for the rest of the time!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
Re: Randoms and Questions 12.12 - 12.18
Edit: totally missed the TMI board and it's right under this one
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I am in the same boat as many of you and not feeling as involved with this pregnancy. I think part of that is because this is my second and I am too busy, but also I don't really know how I felt at 17 weeks last time. I think most of my memories that stuck were from later in the pregnancy when the baby had a foot sticking out my side and it was not possible to forget I was pregnant. Also we delayed telling people this time, so it was not a constant topic of conversation until recently. I anticipate I will hit the halfway point and freak out about how much I have to do.
Sorry everyone dealing with insurance issues and scheduling drama. That is a life suck.
DS2 5/17
#3 Due 9/20
I've been sick since Sunday, and haven't really been able to keep much food down. Our office always has a ton of vendors that bring in food, and today is no exception. My office is directly across from the break room and the smells are KILLING me. Stupid delicious brisket tacos!! Don't smell the way that you do!!
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17
Human sons: 11/2015 & 05/2017
*formerly kayemjay*
eta. I has zero other symptoms other than that.
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry
Now if I could just get rid of this head cold I'll feel so much better!
ETA: small (feels huge to me!) infected abscess...antibiotics and sitz baths...good news is it's not that big and the antibiotics should help with the sinus issues! Boom! 2 for 1 haha
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
Speaking of insurance, has anyone ever switched insurance companies in the middle of pregnancy? I may be getting a new job early next year and would then be switching... Although that's not a major deciding factor, wondering how much of a pain in the ass it'll be.
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
May '17 labor memes
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17
probably 6 weeks til about 12 or 13 weeks and it kinda stopped. I wondered if it was the progesterone I was on from the RE but who knows. Maybe it was just cyclical.
Does anyone else feel guilty for taking their FMLA? I work for a small company and I want my whole 12 weeks. They have been so accommodating but today we had our "vacation picking" meeting and due to my FMLA they have the entire summer blocked off where none of them can take vacation. I feel terrible about it but apparently not terrible enough that I change from 12 weeks requested maternity leave to 6. Just wondering if anyone else feels guilty for placing partners or co workers in an unfortunate situation while you are off?
I feel guilty too. I am part of a small team (2.5 people) and last pregnancy I didn't qualify for FMLA so I was only gone 6 weeks. This time I will be gone the full 12. I'm sorry your leave means your team can't take vacation all summer, but you shouldn't give up that time.
DS2 5/17
#3 Due 9/20
For those that use coconut oil as a moisturizer are you talking straight up cooking-grade coconut oil? My skin is absurdly dry and itchy and I'm about to give it a shot. Just don't want to do anything really silly!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
I think I should feel bad but I don't. I don't have a small company that I work for like you, but I am a therapist so people have to cover my cases and see them while I'm out. I feel worse for my clients for having to change therapists and not my coworkers. I just found out I can request up to 1 year off, but I highly doubt I'll get thebapproval. Wouldn't that be nice.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
Unfortunately I lathered myself in coconut oil daily from head to toe with my first and I still ended up with stretch marks all over. So i believe it's true when they say its genetics. But it totally helps with the itchy skin.
So weird about Magnolia Grace. I have been thinking about this name a lot lately but our last name is McDowell so too much M sound? I'm still thinking on it.
May17 Siggy Challenge
Labor
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
*TW* It's probably a blessing in disguise because I spent 99% of my pregnancy with DD worried that I would suffer a second loss.
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
I'm a little nervous to take time off because I'll be working on a huge 14 month long project that kicks off in February, and I plan to be out all summer. Being with my newborn is so much more important to me in the long run, though. I just hope no one makes stupid decisions on my project when I'm gone.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Im not going to feel bad for staying home unpaid, overtired, and covered in someone else's bodily fluids while my nipples threaten to secede from my body. Think it's a vacation, coworkers? I'll trade you. No questions asked. Enjoy my newborn.
May '17 labor memes
Also zero regrets about being team green. I had my A/S yesterday and will begin monthly ultrasounds, the technician annotated the record that we do not want to know the sex so that no one will show us or say anything accidently.
11.2011 - DS1
02.2013 - loss at 6 wks
06.2014 - DS2
10.2015 - loss at 12 wks
03.2017 - DD
Me:31 DH:32 Married 11/06/10
DD: Born 8/23/13 (clomid+ovidrel+IUI)
BFP 9/9/16 EDD 5/19/17
As for FMLA, I don't think any of us should feel bad! I think it is totally natural to feel a little guilt about leaving, especially if you work in a small business, but being at home with your newborn is a bit more important and they can get over it! I don't think I can take the full 12 weeks due to not being paid for 5 of them, but if we could afford it I would! I can, however, spread out the remaining weeks if I want over the year. So, I can use it for doctor's appointments or if I just want to take Fridays or Mondays off for the rest of the time!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin