Randoms and Questions 12.12 - 12.18

rkstro2

You are all amazing!  Thank you so much for the support!  I feel lucky that I am able to take the whole 12 weeks and I am so thankful to have this group to make me feel better about FMLA!

BeachMommy2B

@rkstro2 I work for a large publicly traded corporation, however it is just my boss and I in my department. I know its going to be tough on him, but he understands that the time is valuable. granted with it being a large company they may have the option to bring in a temp or whatever. But I think the guilt is there no matter what size the company. Bottom line, you have to enjoy the time because you can't get it back. 

pshaortao

12 weeks with your baby > people taking time off for fun. If they have a problem, they can suck it. You will never get those first few weeks back again. Enjoy them all guilt free FMLA is great since your job is protected, although like others have been saying, USA need to get on board with better maternity leave and job protection for all. 

Kipperoo

Agreed with everyone on the no guilt for using FMLA. With my last pregnancy, I worked at a big corporation (actually started when I was 19 weeks pregnant) and I negotiated a full 12 weeks paid during my job acceptance process. With this go around, I work for a small company and I am on the senior management team. The company does not have a written maternity policy (literally, they have never had a pregnant employee in the 5 years they've been around) and I do not qualify for the full 12 weeks of FMLA because the company is so small. In MA, they are required to give me 8 weeks, unpaid. I'm in the process of negotiating how many weeks will be paid, but I WILL be taking the full 12 weeks and I plan to get it in writing that my job will still be here upon my return. It's frustrating to have to put up such a fuss over this, especially because I report directly to the owner/CEO and am involved in all company-wide policy/decision making. It just seems like it should be easier than this. But I'll keep fighting...spending the 12 weeks with my babe is important, but so is standing up for women's rights and paving the way for future mothers in my company!

Jumping off my soapbox. The maternity policies in this country are ridiculously bad. 

CarmCeG

My coworker is all moody today, because I took a personal day yesterday and I hate when she's like this, because I feel like I'm walking on egg shells.

Kipperoo

Bah! I just got a call from my doctor that I have cholestasis again (had with my son) and it's already back. WTF? It's relatively unheard of for it to pop up in the 2nd trimester. They told me it will likely mean medication and extra monitoring through the pregnancy and then an induction at 36 weeks. So annoying...another thing to be worried about. I have my MFM appointment today (and my anatomy scan) and will get additional details, I'm just bummed. 

ShadeofGreen816

@kiperoo that's awful!! I hope you feel better. 

I am SO over these pregnancy headaches. This one has been around since Saturday. Waxes and wanes but never goes completely away. And today it is raging. Anytime I bend over or even stand up/sit down it gets worse. I might lose my mind. However I did just take my final and (AW) will have As in both my classes! One more semester to go. Hopefully the stress of school being gone will help

nda_roxybabe

@Kipperoo Oh no! I know you mentioned being worried about that a couple days ago. That's the extremely itchy palm thing, right?

MoshiMoshi7

@Kipperoo I'm so sorry, that's such a bummer. Hugs!

@ShadeofGreen816 I was having the worst headaches every day, but they've seemed to ease this week (18 weeks). So there is a light at the end of tunnel!

Louise_Belcher

@Kipperoo I'm sorry. That super sucks! I hope they are able to keep everything stable with medicine and monitoring. 

I'm bummed because yesterday I called for my CBC test results and found out my platelets have already fallen below the threshold for an epidural. This is small compared to what some of you ladies are dealing with so sorry for being a complainer. I just wish I wouldn't have called so I could have lived in my fantasy a bit longer that they were not dropping this time. 

nda_roxybabe

@Louise_Belcher What does that mean?

Louise_Belcher

I have a mild form of ITP which means I have lower then normal platelet levels. Mine are not super low normally but drop throughout pregnancy. In order to qualify for an epidural your platelets have to meet a threshold set by your hospital. My hospital is 100. As of last Friday my numbers dropped to 98. This has no effect during my pregnancy for me, but can be a concern during delivery as I run a higher risk of hemorrhaging also there is a slight chance that the baby could have low platelets as the antibodies I have are able to cross the placenta. They tried steroids last time to get them to go up but it didn't do anything.  

Edit because I accidentally posted too early

NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot

@ShadeofGreen816  The headache struggle is a beast.  I've had some luck combining tylenol with a glass of hot or iced green or black tea (for the caffeine).

ShadeofGreen816

Thanks for the moral support ladies. Somehow it's nice to know I'm not alone in my misery. Yes I've found some success in Excedrin tension headache - it's only Tylenol and caffeine. Although my doc OKed regular Excedrin too. I haven't taken any this week since I tried Saturday and Sunday without relief and I hate taking medicines that don't help that baby gets too (even if not overtly harmful). I'll try again now!!

Kipperoo

Thanks to all for the comments on this stupid itching/cholestasis nonsense. I just came back from my anatomy scan (baby girl looks great, everything seems a-okay there!). But, of course, the MFM doc ordered more blood work and ultrasounds due to this liver stuff. Now they want to check to see if it's something besides cholestasis, which I'm really hoping all turns up negative. A whole lot of waiting...but at least the little miss looked fab!

Kipperoo

@ShadeofGreen816, I'm so sorry about the headaches. Excedrine is the only thing that has ever worked on my headaches. Hopefully they get better for you soon!

@Louise_Belcher, your situation sounds so frustrating. So that means no epidural for you? Don't downplay that...I don't know WHAT I would have done during my last delivery without one. Were they able to give you something else for the pain last time?

I am terrible at mobile bumping and I'm sure I missed some other convos I wanted to comment on...

KMD1106

Kipperoo- I'm glad baby girl is looking great! I hope everything comes back good with the blood work. 

Louise_Belcher

@Kipperoo I am so glad baby girl is looking good! I will keep my fingers crossed that all the tests come back negative. Thanks for the support. Yes, the chances of an epidural are slim since steroids didn't work last time. They may try something else this time to boost my platelets at the end and as long as it will not hurt baby I will push for that, but my expectations are low. I am able to have any meds that do not require a spinal. I didn't find much relief from them last time though. I am already scared to go through it again without the option of block. If any mommas out there that have went natural before have some pointers or recommendations on what helped I am all ears! 

sweaterboots

FTM here. Having a particularly uncomfortable day with my abs. My whole midsection is so tight & uncomfortable. Even just sitting/lying still, I can feel my muscles being stretched to capacity, especially my lower abs! Oddly, I'm only showing a teeny bit. But I feel it like woah. Reg strength Tylenol is dumb!

mdlorenz

@Kipperoo Ugh - so sorry to hear you're going through that, but glad to hear the u/s went well. 

@Louise_Belcher  -  I would be hugely disappointed too. That situation sucks so bad. Will your hospital allow for nitrous oxide use? I haven't heard of it being used much around where I am, but it might help more / differently than the IV pain meds. 

ShadeofGreen816

@Louise_Belcher no firsthand info here but I have heard good things about nitrous. Is there a reason you can't have a platelet transfusion? Seems like it would lower your delivery risk. I know with levels as "high" as yours hopefully will be (if they stay in the 80s and 90s) often our hospital doesn't allow it but wondering if the situation is different for L&D?

starphish18

sweaterboots said:

FTM here. Having a particularly uncomfortable day with my abs. My whole midsection is so tight & uncomfortable. Even just sitting/lying still, I can feel my muscles being stretched to capacity, especially my lower abs! Oddly, I'm only showing a teeny bit. But I feel it like woah. Reg strength Tylenol is dumb!

This happened to me in my first tri. It was so uncomfortable, which didn't help how awful I felt anyways. I hope it eases up for you soon! 

starphish18

I'm assuming this is normal. This morning, my right hip started hurting really badly, quickly. It felt like my hip itself and the area just inside of it along the side and front were sore. Kind of a combination of pain and pressure. It caught me by surprise. I did the go-to "drink a glass of water and sit down", and it's been getting better. Still aching worse when I'm standing. Normal pregnancy hip pain? 

Kipperoo

@Louise_Belcher, I have no tips, but have you looked into natural childbirth classes or hypno-birthing? I'm not one who would willing do childbirth without drugs, but friends of mine have had "natural" child births and said those classes made all the difference. 

Louise_Belcher

@mdlorenz The disappointment and anxiety is making me so grumpy. Thanks for understanding. I had just recently read about nitrous oxide. I do not know if they offer it at my hospital. It wasn't mentioned last time, but I am definitely going to ask about every single other option. 

@ShadeofGreen816 I am not sure why that wasn't on the table last time. It hasn't been mentioned this time, but I just was assigned to a new hematologist and I have only spoken with him once. I do know that after delivery last time they did give me transfusions twice because of hemorrhaging. Last time my numbers were down in the 50s by the time of delivery. 

@Kipperoo  I am trying to look into a class like that, unfortunately the area that I live is not all that big and most things I am finding are a 45 minute drive or more. I agree that I am all for meds during childbirth, so this is not my cup of tea!

rkstro2

@Louise_Belcher I am so sorry this is happening and you're already having to worry about your options as far as labor pain management.  It is hard when a place has a hard cutoff (as in a policy) versus assessing patients on a case by case basis.  Is there any chance your OB can get you a consult your hematologist and an anesthesiologist at your hospital?  Sometimes with prior planning/advance notice more options are available, especially in ITP with chronically low-ish platelets versus someone who has acutely low platelets with pre-eclampsia or HELLP.  

Louise_Belcher

@rkstro2 thank you! I know last time my OB (who is a tiny Russian saint) reached out to everyone she could to try to give me as many options as possible and know exactly what limited her. She did consult with anesthesiology at the hospital, the hematologist, and mfm. It sounded like they could be flexible based on the anesthesiologist on call during delivery and my numbers at the time, but by that time my levels were too low for them to feel safe about doing the spinal. Last time, hematology and MFM confirmed delivery cannot be aided by forceps or vacuum as well. Not sure how much those are used though. I know every pregnancy is different, but this one is following the same trajectory. I will definitely push for a consult with anesthesiology. 

KMD1106

starphish18, sounds like round ligament pain. As long as it's going away, I wouldn't worry about it. 

nda_roxybabe

I stayed home sick today and feel guilty. I always feel guilty when I am sick. I was up for a good part of the night with a horrible, terrible stomachache. It still hurts a bit, I'm not sure what it is , but of course it also has me a little worried about baby. 

Louise_Belcher

@nda_roxybabe So sorry you are feeling cruddy! Hope it is better soon. I feel you on the staying home sick guilt. I spend the day convincing myself that I wasn't sick enough. 

Squirtgun

. @Louise_Belcher I'm sorry, that stinks!  I will say that I've not had an epidural with either of my kiddos (they come too fast!) and having good support is totally necessary. If you do take any classes, have your SO go with you so that he can be a good support during labor. 

So today I had an appointment, and Dr had talked about starting weekly progesterone injections this week due to previous early babies. So I asked husband to go with me so that he could do the injections in future. So, by the time he got there, the nurse had already called me back!  I thought he must have gotten caught up at work, and in reality for my entire appointment he was sitting in the waiting room, thinking I wasn't there yet.  Did not even occur to him to ask the receptionist. And today we had a really thorough ultrasound too!  (Dr. ended up deciding not to do the progesterone anyway, so it didn't end up mattering, but it still stinks that he missed the ultrasound!) 

mrsrep123

@squirtgun ugh, super frustrating he was in the waiting room the entire time but at least no progesterone injections!

mrsrep123

@starphish18 I agree that it sounds like round ligament pain. If you're able to, try to stay off of your feet when it's acting up. 

ShadeofGreen816

Yeah @Louise_Belcher seems like if you may potentially end up needing a transfusion anyway, would be nice if you could get it in advance! However, with low platelets, I'm sure you're at an even higher risk for a spinal leak and the AWFUL headaches that comes with that. 

kns1988

My dog ate my cocoa butter lotion when I was out tonight. I try to leave her in my room when I'm not going to be gone for long, but she's lost her privileges now. She's eaten so many things over the past 8 years that I can't believe she's still with me. I feel like a crappy dog owner, but I try so hard to give her a safe environment. She was okay after she ate a bunch of milk chocolate a while back, so I think she'll be okay this time, too. She just finds and eats everything - it's insane. 

champhe

@Louise_Belcher have you looked into a doula or midwife? I would definitely look into the hypnobirthing/hydrotherapy like the other poster mentioned. I'm so sorry you have to forego the epidural! It's one thing to choose not to and a whole other thing to be forced. 

ShadeofGreen816

Just wanted to say that I do more lurking than is probably healthy on other BMBs and even though sometimes I enjoy the drama, I really enjoy the community that we're building here. Especially since @pshaortao got some lurkers to come out of the woodwork and join us! I'm sure a crazy or two will pop out eventually, but I'm really thankful to be going through this insane and exciting time alongside you ladies. 

Louise_Belcher

@champhe I will check that out. I am not really certain what a doula or midwife do so I need to read up. Google here I come! 

vrj0522

@kns1988 - My dog is always eating things that he shouldn't either. I don't know how many boxes of chocolates he's eaten in his life. The only thing that has really scared me so bad that I made him throw up with peroxide was a bowl of grapes. He's almost 13 yrs old now so I'm guessing some dogs' stomachs are stronger. 

BabyMC517

Random...I kept feeling like my bump wasn't really a bump because I'm a little overweight and just felt my stomach was my bump, if that makes sense. But as of yesterday, I definitely feel as if I have a legit bump now! Abs feel like they are stretching more and it "pops" out a little bit differently. Makes everything feel a little more real...now if I would only start feeling baby move I'd be all set!