Or for the lack of drama and bitchiness in general. Maybe TB is a secret reality show and we were being too friendly to each other, so we got cancelled!!!
Has anyone found that it's getting harder and harder to do kegels (which I hate) properly? I don't know if it's my massive bump or what, but I feel like I am very conscious of trying not to tighten my stomach or butt muscles, and lately it's just exhausting and I feel like I don't have great form.
Kudos to us for not having a MBF on here since the week of 11/7. One would think this group doesn't consist of pregnant ladies in a very hormonal third trimester! Let's just blame the holiday spirit
My mom has been talking about crocheting a blanket for the baby for a while now... and I realized something really cool about this. My mom doesn't know how to start the first row or so of a crochet piece... not really sure why. Any time she ever wanted to crochet something, she would visit my dad's mom and ask her to do the first few rows for her.
My mom hasn't crocheted anything in many, many years. And my grandma, who I loved so so so so much, passed away in 2007 from Alzheimer's complications and cancer. So I was curious how my mom was going to make a crochet blanket given that my grandma has been gone for almost a decade now. It turns out that a couple of months before she passed away, she made one last starter piece for my mom and my mom has been holding on to it for all this time. So our baby's blanket will have been partially crocheted by my passed away grandma. My grandma was one of the sweetest people I've ever know and she had such a kind heart, so I'm super happy about this
Does anyone else have no idea how many kids they want? i feel like a lot of people always knew they wanted a big family, or always knew they were one and done. And I just have no clue. I see a lot of benefits to a one child lifestyle, I hate being pregnant, but I had 4 siblings and enjoyed growing up in a big family.
Does anyone else have no idea how many kids they want? i feel like a lot of people always knew they wanted a big family, or always knew they were one and done. And I just have no clue. I see a lot of benefits to a one child lifestyle, I hate being pregnant, but I had 4 siblings and enjoyed growing up in a big family.
My husband and I have always talked about having two kids. We both come from two-kid families and think that will work well for us. I love the idea of having more, but I don't think we could manage it financially and logistically (no family nearby to help).
Does anyone else have no idea how many kids they want? i feel like a lot of people always knew they wanted a big family, or always knew they were one and done. And I just have no clue. I see a lot of benefits to a one child lifestyle, I hate being pregnant, but I had 4 siblings and enjoyed growing up in a big family.
*raises hand* *also huge TW: loss* Up until about a year and a half ago, I didn't want kids at all, nor did my fiancee--and we'd been together for a pretty long while, so this was just a common understanding between us. I was on the pill. And then one day, we found out I was pregnant and there was this tremendous disconnect between us suddenly because we were both freaked out. And then we found out that they were twins. And I was even more freaked out and suddenly he was way less--he thought it was cool. We lost them, and then we went through several months of grieving and the communication between us started to crumble because we just didn't know how to really come together and make sense of what our goals were with children after losing something neither of us really had ever previously wanted... if that makes any sense.
We eventually finally sort of regained our sense of composure as a couple and were able to talk about the loss and it brought us together so much and we walked into the conversation of trying to conceive about 4 or 5 months later, last December, still not knowing how many we wanted... but just that we loved the idea of there being some physical being that was a sentient manifestation of our love. As we're nearing the end of this pregnancy, the conversation has come up again since birth control is on the table again... and we don't know. We've just kind of accepted that the conversation, much like the one that came from our loss, is ever-growing and that our feelings might change with change itself.
I smile when I see people who know from the time they were little girls that they wanted to be a mom of a big family or just one... but I think there's some value in also accepting that sometimes the answer to that question is guided by other things going on in your life as well.
@marynog Finances are definitely a consideration for me too. We are both very frugal because we have an expensive hobby (traveling) so one child makes that much more feasible.
@canavara I think losing my first baby definitely affects how I feel too. A huge part of why this being our last baby appeals to me is fear- I don't want to spend another 9 months holding my breath. And while I don't want to let fear run my life, I'm just planning on enjoying raising this child and hoping it becomes more clear down the line.
@kurtni DH and I have both said between 4-6 (I'm an only child who always wanted a huge family and DH is the youngest of 6) but have also always, always said we'll take it one at a time and decide as we go. **TW** This baby will be our second baby, third pregnancy, so I totally understand that there is that fear involved in getting pregnant again after a loss. Plus the finances and the emotional and physical strain that having kids takes are all considerations for us. We may have this baby and decide we are DONE or we may not.
Does anyone else have no idea how many kids they want? i feel like a lot of people always knew they wanted a big family, or always knew they were one and done. And I just have no clue. I see a lot of benefits to a one child lifestyle, I hate being pregnant, but I had 4 siblings and enjoyed growing up in a big family.
I'm in the same boat. I always thought I wanted like 3 but it was so hard to just get this baby (took two years, 2 miscarriages and a surgical procedure on my uterus) I don't know if I am up for another round of that to get a second even though since I had the surgery it might not be as hard the next time. hankfully I'm on the younger side (29) so we have some time on our side before we have to decide.
@Kurtni we don't know how many we want. I have a step-DD, DS1, this baby is a boy, and I want to try maybe one to two more times for a DD of my own. DH is done with kids but I made it very clear I want to try for a girl still. I feel like we can handle at least one more kid.
We have 4 as our current magic number. Like so many others have mentioned *TW* having a loss will often impact that decision. For me, it impacts it less in the not wanting to try category, but more in the "I realize I am promised nothing in the future" category. So when asked, we always just say, as many as my body allows and we can afford! But I do very much hope that we get a whole brood of children.
My husband and I both agree on wanting 2 and have discussed possibly 3, but that conversation isn't even really a thing until we have the 2.
We feel pretty lucky to be pregnant now (despite my constant discomfort and whining) and just hope we can get pregnant again in the future.
@Kurtni we love to travel as well and actually get excited about the possibility of bringing our daughter places in the future. We'll obviously have to do less adventurous things for a while, but it's fun brainstorming baby friendly places to visit.
For the longest I didn't want kids. My parents and in-laws gave up. I had some thyroid issues that put me out of commission for two years. When we finally decided to try, my only stipulation was that I would like to have two. I have a sister and couldn't imagine being an only child. So, we had DS--and I was completely happy with just the one, but wanted to give him someone. After two losses, this time was our last shot. Either we'd have a baby or DS would be an only child.
I don't think I'd want three, but financially we're tied to two, plus our ages. I'm 38, DH is 42. I love the split (4 years) between DS and this baby and am completely happy!
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20 DS born 9/4/12 MMC July 2015 MMC January 2016
This is our first, and we both agree we want four kids. We both grew up with 6 siblings each, so we love the idea of a "big" family, but not too big.... I want 4 because I don't want a middle child. We all are close in age so everyone kind of "paired off" as almost life buddies. But there was always someone kinda left out. But we'll see. We both had young parents. I'm not sure if I want to go through back to back pregnancies four times for the rest of my 20s... but then I also would like our kids to be close in age. So things may change!
However my mother is all for us going until my body gives and shooting for 7 kids like them.... she wants a hoard of grandbabbies. LOL
@hjmorgan that's funny! My MIL had 6 of her own and if I dare mention having 6 she acts like I'm a crazy person, even though both of her daughters have 5 each so I can't quite figure out why 6 seems so HUGELY CRAZY to her. My family on the other hand, where most everyone had 1 or 2 is like "um, you're done now right? RIGHT?!"
Growing up i would say 2 or 3. But once I got married last October we decided on 1 and done. I am now 35 and my DH will be 39 when baby gets here. I'm glad that's what we decided because like you I have not liked being pregnant and don't think I would have done it again anyway!
We always said 3 before because we both came from 3 kid households. And we wanted them about 2/3 years apart. But this pregnancy has been so rough, just waaaay more intense than I expected. I have no idea how I could do it with a toddler running around. You STMs are superheroes in my book. So now we are talking about only having 2, and spacing them more like 4 years. DH is not totally in love with this yet, but we'll see how it goes.
@BAJDesigns not going to lie, being pregnant with a toddler is tough. This second pregnancy was harder than my first. I was sick the first time for about 24 weeks and this time it waned around 28 but I also have so much more physical pain. However, I still think I'd do it again. it's worth it!
I want 4 to 6, and my fiance kinda has said he's okay with the 2. Maybe one more a couple years from now. He has 3 sisters and lots of close cousins vs me, I have one sister nearly 10 years younger. I spent LOTS of time babysitting and I just love having kids around. We're gonna definitely wait and see how having these 2 so close together is gonna be. Cause our plan right now is to get married Oct. 2018 at our 5 year mark, and by then I should be at least started on a Bachelors degree, depending on how this job works out and his job works. We're also hoping to move out of state by then, I don't want my kids going through the school system I was in. I want a better school for them and more opportunities. So depending on how those plans work out with determine if we do have another. but I decided I definitely want one more at least, and then we could be done lol he's kinda shrugged and said if it happens it was meant to be lol
Re: November Randoms
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
*TW*
TWIN LOSS 7.2.15
BFP 9.7.15 CP
BFP 12.31.15 MC 2.28.16
BFP 10.14.17 CP
BFP 3.10.18 D&C 4.13.18
My mom hasn't crocheted anything in many, many years. And my grandma, who I loved so so so so much, passed away in 2007 from Alzheimer's complications and cancer. So I was curious how my mom was going to make a crochet blanket given that my grandma has been gone for almost a decade now. It turns out that a couple of months before she passed away, she made one last starter piece for my mom and my mom has been holding on to it for all this time. So our baby's blanket will have been partially crocheted by my passed away grandma. My grandma was one of the sweetest people I've ever know and she had such a kind heart, so I'm super happy about this
We eventually finally sort of regained our sense of composure as a couple and were able to talk about the loss and it brought us together so much and we walked into the conversation of trying to conceive about 4 or 5 months later, last December, still not knowing how many we wanted... but just that we loved the idea of there being some physical being that was a sentient manifestation of our love. As we're nearing the end of this pregnancy, the conversation has come up again since birth control is on the table again... and we don't know. We've just kind of accepted that the conversation, much like the one that came from our loss, is ever-growing and that our feelings might change with change itself.
I smile when I see people who know from the time they were little girls that they wanted to be a mom of a big family or just one... but I think there's some value in also accepting that sometimes the answer to that question is guided by other things going on in your life as well.
@canavara I think losing my first baby definitely affects how I feel too. A huge part of why this being our last baby appeals to me is fear- I don't want to spend another 9 months holding my breath. And while I don't want to let fear run my life, I'm just planning on enjoying raising this child and hoping it becomes more clear down the line.
BFP1 12/24/14 - EDD 09/07/15 (D/C 8w1d)
BFP2 6/12/15 - EDD 2/22/16 (D/C 10w3d)
———
Diagnoses and Treatments
PCOS (myo-inositol, excercize)
Indeterminant levels of APS IgM antibodies (baby aspirin)
Sub-septate uterus (hysteroscopic septoplasty 12/18/15)
———
BFP3 05/02/16 EDD 01/09/17 DS born 01/05/17
BFP4 01/28/19 EDD 10/?/19 🤞🙏
We feel pretty lucky to be pregnant now (despite my constant discomfort and whining) and just hope we can get pregnant again in the future.
@Kurtni we love to travel as well and actually get excited about the possibility of bringing our daughter places in the future. We'll obviously have to do less adventurous things for a while, but it's fun brainstorming baby friendly places to visit.
I don't think I'd want three, but financially we're tied to two, plus our ages. I'm 38, DH is 42. I love the split (4 years) between DS and this baby and am completely happy!
Team Blue ~ Jan. 20
DS born 9/4/12
MMC July 2015
MMC January 2016
However my mother is all for us going until my body gives and shooting for 7 kids like them.... she wants a hoard of grandbabbies. LOL