Anyone getting any heartburn already? I'm only 12 weeks with #2, but I've had it off and on the past few days. At first I thought maybe the stress of the election brought it on, but maybe not.. Seems early. I barely had any with kid #1, and only while I was away on vacation eating out the whole time.
Married since 8.2.08 DS born 8.11.14 BFP #2: 9.14.16, EDD: 5.24.17
@lulubemadness the sex won't change but sometimes the male sex organs are not yet visable until 20 weeks- my random: is my screen name stil jamielynn9)8587 or whatnot? It's showing as changed on my profile but my posts are still reading with the former screen name...:/ anyone have any recommendations for fixing?
Oh okay thank you ( your screenname was something else last I seen it)
Anyone getting any heartburn already? I'm only 12 weeks with #2, but I've had it off and on the past few days. At first I thought maybe the stress of the election brought it on, but maybe not.. Seems early. I barely had any with kid #1, and only while I was away on vacation eating out the whole time.
Yup! It's getting bad but mine is mostly at night.
I have so many random things on my mind today, and since no thread has been started for this week, I'll just post here. 1. My husband's family is driving me nuts. I want so badly for them to understand where we are coming from and to have a good relationship with his mom and sister, but they cannot see anything but what they want. For years his sister has pitched a fit about any and everything we do. She was sooo upset last year and called him crying saying she doesn't feel like she has a brother anymore because he wasn't there to wake up at their parents on Christmas morning (she's thirty and has a boyfriend of 5 years that never do holidays together....). We had invited his family to celebrate at our house the next day and we cooked and were very excited but she hated it. We do Thanksgiving with them on Friday and of course that's not good enough. They used to live a mile from us so we did lunch with my family and dinner with his for every holiday but they moved three hours away so that's just the way it is now and how is it our fault? She has insulted me numerous times but thinks that my husband should stand up to me if I ever said anything about them... (WHAAAAT) and also thinks that he should stand up to me so that we can do more with them??? Again, WHAATTT? Maybe if you were nice, we'd want to do more with you, it's not my fault. So that wedding in CT I posted about a few weeks ago, despite not wanting to go, they guilted him into going without me while we got rocked by that hurricane. I ended up spotting and needing an U/S the day he returned and I didn't even put two and two together but after two miscarriages, my husband is worried I over did it while he was gone. He's supposed to go to another wedding in CT this weekend and I went back and forth on whether or not it was okay to ask him not to go and felt so bad but in the end he decided that he didn't feel good about it because if anything was to happen, he wouldn't be here. He explained that to her and her response was "Alright *Husbands Name*" She literally never cares about anything but what she thinks we're doing wrong and I'm so sick of it. She'll complain to his mom and she'll call us crying I'm sure.
2. This heartburn/food aversion stuff is awful. I wish someone could feed me while i was sleeping so I wouldn't have to figure out what to eat.
3. My dr is out for a "medical emergency." she is pregnant and due next month, so I hope everything is okay with her and the baby. I have an appointment on Wednesday and just switched to a different dr for that appointment, but I've never dealt with this dr. I tried to ask how long she would be out but they said two weeks at least and they were unsure about if she'd even be back then. My anatomy scan is in two weeks, so I tried to go ahead and reschedule it so I could get it with a Dr that I have seen before, but she wouldn't let me change it because they were only rescheduling hers for this week so far, which makes no sense...
I have so many random things on my mind today, and since no thread has been started for this week, I'll just post here. 1. My husband's family is driving me nuts. I want so badly for them to understand where we are coming from and to have a good relationship with his mom and sister, but they cannot see anything but what they want. For years his sister has pitched a fit about any and everything we do. She was sooo upset last year and called him crying saying she doesn't feel like she has a brother anymore because he wasn't there to wake up at their parents on Christmas morning (she's thirty and has a boyfriend of 5 years that never do holidays together....). We had invited his family to celebrate at our house the next day and we cooked and were very excited but she hated it. We do Thanksgiving with them on Friday and of course that's not good enough. They used to live a mile from us so we did lunch with my family and dinner with his for every holiday but they moved three hours away so that's just the way it is now and how is it our fault? She has insulted me numerous times but thinks that my husband should stand up to me if I ever said anything about them... (WHAAAAT) and also thinks that he should stand up to me so that we can do more with them??? Again, WHAATTT? Maybe if you were nice, we'd want to do more with you, it's not my fault. So that wedding in CT I posted about a few weeks ago, despite not wanting to go, they guilted him into going without me while we got rocked by that hurricane. I ended up spotting and needing an U/S the day he returned and I didn't even put two and two together but after two miscarriages, my husband is worried I over did it while he was gone. He's supposed to go to another wedding in CT this weekend and I went back and forth on whether or not it was okay to ask him not to go and felt so bad but in the end he decided that he didn't feel good about it because if anything was to happen, he wouldn't be here. He explained that to her and her response was "Alright *Husbands Name*" She literally never cares about anything but what she thinks we're doing wrong and I'm so sick of it. She'll complain to his mom and she'll call us crying I'm sure.
Do you only celebrate with your ILs on the days after the holidays (i.e. Friday after Thanksgiving, day after Christmas)? If so, then I understand your SIL's frustration. I have to travel across the country for holidays to see my family and my ILs and they each leave 3 hours apart. Thanksgiving is hard one to split up so we try to alternate who gets the actual holiday each time we go back for. We always split xmas eve and xmas between the two families. That way, each family gets a holiday and no one has to do extra work or cooking on our behalf.
We used to do both the day of. But since they moved that is how it is because we wanted to have Christmas morning in our home with our daughter last year. My family lives in our neighborhood so obviously we get to see them, just like we saw the ILs when they lived here too. I don't think it's ridiculous to want to be home with your family (like DH and the kids, not my family) for the day and travel and have the weekend with them the next day.
Can I complain on this thread? I work in a private practice anesthesia group and I told the two main bosses of the company and the business mgr/HR about the pregnancy to allow time to figure out maternity leave. We cover two hospitals and I work mainly at one. I am at the "other" hospital this week and everyone in the OR here is congratulating me on the pregnancy. EVERYONE. Not just anesthesia people in our group (who shouldn't know anyway) but everyone from circulators to scrub techs to housekeepers to unit clerks. I appreciate all the congrats and everyone's well wishes but I am flabbergasted that one of my "colleagues" took it upon himself to tell everyone. I didn't even tell him of the pregnancy, he just found out about it bc we delayed vacation picking for next year as they try to figure out how to cover my maternity leave. I wasn't planning on telling anyone else in our group or in the OR for another 2-3 weeks at 14-15 weeks. So frustrated.
@Jkp7749 that is insane. I am VERY into family holidays and traditions and the like, but I completely understand that you can't always to things the way you did when you were kids. Especially since they moved three hours away. I'm sorry you're dealing with that. It sounds like she needs to grow up.
@RainyDays86 you have no idea. it sucks because I don't want to come between my husband and his sister, and consequently his family, but it is CRAZY to me. Her bf family is far away and they never go see them... it's very hypocritical.
I am having the hardest time wanting to sell a couple of my cribs. We transferred the kids to toddler beds a couple of months ago and now I have 4 empty cribs (2 that were grandma's house cribs). One will probably go back to my mom's and I will donate another and one will stay with us in the new nursery, but I feel so many emotions about selling the matching one
@jkp7749 I mean, I get what you're saying about having your own traditions with your immediate family. But I get your SIL's frustration. From an outsider's perspective, it does seem like you are favoring your family. It's probably not helped by the fact that you likely see your family more often than your ILs since they moved. Sure, they decide to move and I obviously don't know the circumstances of that, but I bet there's a compromise to be had here.
I am certainly not trying to argue, and appreciate your opinion because I truly don't understand her reactions at all. If we spent the afternoon on Christmas with them, we would have seen them for a few hours. We waited until the next day so we'd have the entire day with them. For thanksgiving, if we traveled again we'd see them for a few hours, so instead we see them for the entire weekend... how are they getting the shaft?
ETA: we see my parents for a few hours christmas mid morning and a few hours for lunch on thanksgiving. We don't live spend more time there.
@jkp7749 In your situation, I would talk to your husband about it- leaving SIL out of it. Is he happy with the way holidays are set up? Would he rather see his family actually on the holiday, or is near it ok? If he's happy, then I don't see rearranging just because high maintenance SIL doesn't like it. In my situation, we live in the same town as my in laws, while my family is a few hours away. Before kids, we switched back years to see each family on the actual holiday. (One year his family on Christmas, mine on thanksgiving and New Years, switching every other year.). Once we have had kids, though, we decided to have the actual holiday at our house, like you do. It does mean that we see his family on the actual holiday, and mine either before or after, but it is important to both of us that the kids get Christmas morning in their own house, and get to go to their own church that day as well. My family understands and is supportive of our situation, but even if they weren't, I think the priority should be that you, husband, and kiddos are happy with the situation.
My husband is happy with it and it was ultimately up to him how we do it. he knows I am not a fan of traveling on the holidays, I never had to growing up and loved that we were home for holidays. I even thought MIL would like it because she moved because she wanted us to have to stay with her when we visit (another long story). So I think we both thought they'd like having more time.
@jkp7749 I feel your pain about the holiday situation. My parents are divorced and so are my DH... literally this year we have like 6 or 7 Christmas gatherings in a 1 or 2 week span... my family is the side that always feels like they are getting the short end of the stick even though I attend every holiday. I've already been hearing about it for thanksgiving for the past month.. which we have to go to 3 places. So I get the "ugh so your going to leave early to go to the other side? and cant you just skip that side for once".... I think it would be nice to go on vacation for like 2 solid months and just skip all of the holiday gatherings so I could avoid all of the long days of traveling and everyone getting mad that we only stay for a few hours.
For holidays- I started hosting and invite all relatives/ inlaws/ and their family. We will have over 30 people at Thanksgiving- I do the meats, drinks, appetizers, and make the family make the sides! Just have to make sure the house is decently clean!
@rkstro2 That's really frustrating. I'm sorry someone spilled the beans before you were ready.
@Jkp7749 That would really bother me, as well. Luckily, our families are really relaxed about holiday "obligations". My ILs live right in town, whereas my parents are 1.5 hours away. We alternate actual xmas day every other year between my parents' house and his, and we do the other side either xmas eve or a weekend. We always end up spending more time at my parents', simply because they're further away and we generally spend a night. However, once we have a kid, we may want to do xmas morning at our own house, like you. So, our family plans would have to adjust around that. I would be mad if either family put pressure on us about holiday plans, and I'm fortunate that's not the case. So, I definitely understand why that would be upsetting.
@MamaMiller that's basically what we started for thanksgiving. Except my husbands amazing grandma and great aunt usually end up cooking everything. It's just at my house. Historically, we do 5 Christmas gatherings between Christmas Eve and day, but I've declared this year will be the last time. I'm willing to do Christmas Eve with my inlaws ongoing (they only live about an hour away) but Christmas will be an at-home holiday since we'll have a baby next year. I'd really prefer to do Christmas morning home with just H and kids, then everyone is welcome to come over for lunch or dinner. I refuse to do all this driving all over the state with a baby. Luckily our family all gets along really well, so I don't foresee this being an issue.
Holidays with family are always difficult with multiple families, and even more so when there is divorce involved!
I think my previous comments on the holiday rotation might seem judgey. I've been on both sides of this issue. @Jkp7749 - If your DH is anything like mine and if we have similar ILs, I suspect your issue is probably related to your DH's failure to communicate to his family and his sister feeling let down. My DH has 2 sisters and I always say it's like having 3 MILs. There's always a bunch of drama and half the time it's because DH and his family aren't great at communicating. I also know what it feels like to be on the side of the family that "loses" a family member to their ILs. Growing up, we had to have a "fake Christmas" with my aunt every year because she spent the real holiday with her ILs that lived near her. It was a hassle because we already felt like we'd wrapped up our celebrations on xmas eve and xmas. Plus, my grandmother had to get the house ready for my aunt and cook another set of family meals. I think it was exhausting for her. Anyway, my point was, maybe try to see all sides of the issue and maybe make sure DH (or you) has fully communicated your side to his family
Ah yes, the holiday rotation is always an exciting one.... Divorced and re-coupled parents on both my side and husband's side means FOUR places to go for every holiday... We try to do a rotation but there's always at least one person who get shorted on time/attention, and in the meantime we spend most of the holidays in the car!
Re: Randoms and Questions 11.7-11.13
Edit- it worked hooray
DS born 8.11.14
BFP #2: 9.14.16, EDD: 5.24.17
1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
1. My husband's family is driving me nuts. I want so badly for them to understand where we are coming from and to have a good relationship with his mom and sister, but they cannot see anything but what they want. For years his sister has pitched a fit about any and everything we do. She was sooo upset last year and called him crying saying she doesn't feel like she has a brother anymore because he wasn't there to wake up at their parents on Christmas morning (she's thirty and has a boyfriend of 5 years that never do holidays together....). We had invited his family to celebrate at our house the next day and we cooked and were very excited but she hated it. We do Thanksgiving with them on Friday and of course that's not good enough. They used to live a mile from us so we did lunch with my family and dinner with his for every holiday but they moved three hours away so that's just the way it is now and how is it our fault? She has insulted me numerous times but thinks that my husband should stand up to me if I ever said anything about them... (WHAAAAT) and also thinks that he should stand up to me so that we can do more with them??? Again, WHAATTT? Maybe if you were nice, we'd want to do more with you, it's not my fault. So that wedding in CT I posted about a few weeks ago, despite not wanting to go, they guilted him into going without me while we got rocked by that hurricane. I ended up spotting and needing an U/S the day he returned and I didn't even put two and two together but after two miscarriages, my husband is worried I over did it while he was gone. He's supposed to go to another wedding in CT this weekend and I went back and forth on whether or not it was okay to ask him not to go and felt so bad but in the end he decided that he didn't feel good about it because if anything was to happen, he wouldn't be here. He explained that to her and her response was "Alright *Husbands Name*" She literally never cares about anything but what she thinks we're doing wrong and I'm so sick of it. She'll complain to his mom and she'll call us crying I'm sure.
2. This heartburn/food aversion stuff is awful. I wish someone could feed me while i was sleeping so I wouldn't have to figure out what to eat.
3. My dr is out for a "medical emergency." she is pregnant and due next month, so I hope everything is okay with her and the baby. I have an appointment on Wednesday and just switched to a different dr for that appointment, but I've never dealt with this dr. I tried to ask how long she would be out but they said two weeks at least and they were unsure about if she'd even be back then. My anatomy scan is in two weeks, so I tried to go ahead and reschedule it so I could get it with a Dr that I have seen before, but she wouldn't let me change it because they were only rescheduling hers for this week so far, which makes no sense...
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1/7/2015 Twins born @ 34 weeks
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ETA: we see my parents for a few hours christmas mid morning and a few hours for lunch on thanksgiving. We don't live spend more time there.
In my situation, we live in the same town as my in laws, while my family is a few hours away. Before kids, we switched back years to see each family on the actual holiday. (One year his family on Christmas, mine on thanksgiving and New Years, switching every other year.). Once we have had kids, though, we decided to have the actual holiday at our house, like you do. It does mean that we see his family on the actual holiday, and mine either before or after, but it is important to both of us that the kids get Christmas morning in their own house, and get to go to their own church that day as well. My family understands and is supportive of our situation, but even if they weren't, I think the priority should be that you, husband, and kiddos are happy with the situation.
@Jkp7749 That would really bother me, as well. Luckily, our families are really relaxed about holiday "obligations". My ILs live right in town, whereas my parents are 1.5 hours away. We alternate actual xmas day every other year between my parents' house and his, and we do the other side either xmas eve or a weekend. We always end up spending more time at my parents', simply because they're further away and we generally spend a night. However, once we have a kid, we may want to do xmas morning at our own house, like you. So, our family plans would have to adjust around that. I would be mad if either family put pressure on us about holiday plans, and I'm fortunate that's not the case. So, I definitely understand why that would be upsetting.
Holidays with family are always difficult with multiple families, and even more so when there is divorce involved!
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