Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
AandDM2014
member
Re: *** August Two Week Wait ***
It's understandable that the process would be more nervewracking for you, @AandDM2014. Fingers crossed for all the best outcome for you.
@BornReady So far I can definitely feel stuff going on in my abdomen, but it could just be my mind messing with me, or the progesterone shots. My RE has me do 48 hours of bed rest, which ended on Saturday morning (though my mom stayed until about 2, just to have extra time to hang out), then I can do up to 30 minutes of easy exercise (like walking) per day. No sex until after the second ultrasound (if we get that far), though last time we didn't ask first, and ended up doing it after the first positive beta, and I think two more times before he said it was okay (I think he just doesn't want us having sex at all, like ever). I of course can do no alcohol, which is fine by me since I don't usually drink anyways, and no caffeine. The biggest bummer is that we just got into slacklining, and now I can't do it anymore (jarring falls from a rope probably aren't best for embryos).
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
I also have little to no faith in this cycle and feel like I'm out already. I know it's crazy but when I was KU last time my DH had a 'feeling' and was asking me when I could test almost immediately after I ovulated. So now I can't help but feel like if he doesn't have that feeling than I'm definitely not KU. And I know it's crazy. But I guess it's fueling me being a pessimist right now.
Wow, sorry to come in her like such a Debbie downer this morning!
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Edited CD1 date. I was off by one day.
Me: 40 DH: 47
Married: 10/2015
DSD: 17
BFP #1: 6/2/15, ectopic, metho 7/15
BFP #2: 12/4/15, cp 12/7/15
BFP #3: 8/5/16, MMC discovered 9/1, Misoprostol 9/19
BFP #4: 5/10/17, EDD 1/20/2018
Baby boy born January 12, 2018, 6 lbs 3.3 oz, 20.5 in.
@AliciaGoose I hope your test goes well too! I think that @AandDM2014 nailed it, but I think it's naturally harder to feel optimistic after a loss, so even if your husband has a feeling, he may not want to say so after a loss. Sending positive thoughts!
@NewMommyCoop Fingers Crossed for you! 8 dpo is about when my crazy sets in.
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL!
E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
Married: 11.12.11
TTC: Nov 2015
BFP #1: 1.22.16 MMC: 2.29.16 ( tetrasomy 11, partial deletion 1, XXX)
D&C: 3.2.16
BFP #2: 4.14.16 CP: 4.17.16
BFP #3: 6.10.2016 CP: 6.17.2016
RE appt: 6.27.2016- saline sono all clear
Chromosome karyotype- Normal both me and DH
Progenity: + carrier Tay-Sachs, Gaucher's, hemachromatosis. DH: carrier Alpha 1 anti-trypsin
Clomid + TI Cycle #1: pending 8.15.16
Fur mom to 2 sled masters: an Alaskan malamute and a malamute wolf hybrid
half marathon running, surgery loving trauma hand and reconstructive plastic surgery PA-C
PCOS, hypothyroid, MTHFR, hx of LEEP in 2006
anyway I have all my fingers and toes crossed for your ladies in this TWW. let's get the BFPs rolling!
Married 10/12
DS 11/14
Ectopic 2/16
PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
IUI x 3- BFN
Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
FET- 6/17- BFP!
Due Feb 15, 2017
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
@AandDM2014 I plan to POAS the morning of beta so that DH and I can get the results together before going to work.
I bought some Wondfos and they arrived yesterday, but I am not inclined to test early since my beta itself is kinda early. (Question: for those of you who have ordered them in the past, did they not come in a box? I was kinda surprised that the packets were just sent in a plastic bag. I even checked to make sure the seller was on the "approved" list.)
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL!
E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
edit- grammar
Married 10/12
DS 11/14
Ectopic 2/16
PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
IUI x 3- BFN
Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
FET- 6/17- BFP!
Due Feb 15, 2017
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
When are you ladies testing?
ttc July 2015 ~ bfp Nov 2015 (cp)
bfp Dec 2015 ~ (tfmr 17wk, March 2016, genetic disease)
ttcal May 2016
Me: 40 DH: 47
Married: 10/2015
DSD: 17
BFP #1: 6/2/15, ectopic, metho 7/15
BFP #2: 12/4/15, cp 12/7/15
BFP #3: 8/5/16, MMC discovered 9/1, Misoprostol 9/19
BFP #4: 5/10/17, EDD 1/20/2018
Baby boy born January 12, 2018, 6 lbs 3.3 oz, 20.5 in.
@fivetimesnoluck I am thinking very positive thoughts for you! My wondfos came in a fancy ziploc.
@KarenBeth714 I will probably test next Tuesday...We will see how long I last.
@brooklngirl18Fingers crossed you are 2DPO!
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Me: 40 DH: 47
Married: 10/2015
DSD: 17
BFP #1: 6/2/15, ectopic, metho 7/15
BFP #2: 12/4/15, cp 12/7/15
BFP #3: 8/5/16, MMC discovered 9/1, Misoprostol 9/19
BFP #4: 5/10/17, EDD 1/20/2018
Baby boy born January 12, 2018, 6 lbs 3.3 oz, 20.5 in.
Y'all will know when I do! I plan to POAS before DH and I part ways in the morning. I'm waffling with little hope right now, but no matter how I feel/prepare it still always sucks to get a BFN.
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL!
E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
Had awesome, realistic dreams about a BFP and woke up happy, but that quickly turned back to the harsh reality.
Oh, and DH and I discovered last night that the waterline to our dishwasher has been leaking for probably about a month! Kitchen floor underneath and (cheap!) counter above it is damaged! We have called insurance and we had to turn all the water off because the line to the dw doesn't have a shut off valve to it! Good times over here. Hope all of you have a better day. xo
Me: 40, DH: 35 / Married: 2009; TTC #1: 2013
2013 - 2015: 5 pregnancies —> 5 miscarriages
TTCAL with RE (RPL specialist): February 2016
2016: 3 medicated TI cycles —> 3 medicated IUI cycles: All BFN
Donor Egg IVF Transfer: May 1, 2017
May 11, 2017: BFP!! Beta #1: 449.1, Beta #2: 844, Beta #3: 1714
EDD: 1/17/18, it's a GIRL!
E. L. A. born 12/7/2017
Married 7/13
TTC #1 since 10/13
BFP 2/4/15, MC twin boys at 18w3d 5/15
IUI #1 2/25/16
Me: 40 DH: 47
Married: 10/2015
DSD: 17
BFP #1: 6/2/15, ectopic, metho 7/15
BFP #2: 12/4/15, cp 12/7/15
BFP #3: 8/5/16, MMC discovered 9/1, Misoprostol 9/19
BFP #4: 5/10/17, EDD 1/20/2018
Baby boy born January 12, 2018, 6 lbs 3.3 oz, 20.5 in.
Married: 11.12.11
TTC: Nov 2015
BFP #1: 1.22.16 MMC: 2.29.16 ( tetrasomy 11, partial deletion 1, XXX)
D&C: 3.2.16
BFP #2: 4.14.16 CP: 4.17.16
BFP #3: 6.10.2016 CP: 6.17.2016
RE appt: 6.27.2016- saline sono all clear
Chromosome karyotype- Normal both me and DH
Progenity: + carrier Tay-Sachs, Gaucher's, hemachromatosis. DH: carrier Alpha 1 anti-trypsin
Clomid + TI Cycle #1: pending 8.15.16
Fur mom to 2 sled masters: an Alaskan malamute and a malamute wolf hybrid
half marathon running, surgery loving trauma hand and reconstructive plastic surgery PA-C
PCOS, hypothyroid, MTHFR, hx of LEEP in 2006
TTC #1: September 2015-January 2016
BFP #1: 1/25/16 - MMC Diagnosed 3/22/16
TTCAL: June 2016
BFP #2: 8/26/16 - EDD 5/9/17
Jackson born 5/6/17 at 8:36 PM - 9lbs 5oz & 21in
Married 10/12
DS 11/14
Ectopic 2/16
PCOS/Ovulation Dysfunction 11/16
IUI x 3- BFN
Laparoscopy 3/17 Endo and tubal damage
IVF- 4/17- 40 eggs retrieved, 10 blasts, 7 pgs tested embryos
FET- 6/17- BFP!
Due Feb 15, 2017
Me - 28, Lean PCOS
DH - 31
Married June 2010, TTC since March 2014
Blog: ourbinarystar.com
FET cycle #3 Transfer July 28th 2016, Triplets born healthy on February 26th 2017 at 33w1d!
My 7dpo testing was this morning and I'm anxiously waiting to hear back from my OBs office. My OB is on vacation but I made sure the nurse out the order in under the other OB so they could interpret the results ASAP. At this point I'm no longer thinking ASAP will be today.
On the positive side of this, I've made it one week into the TWW without going TOO BSC! So that's something.
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16