This is not a happy TICB: A friend of mine lost her little niece yesterday. She was born 20 weeks early and her little body just couldn't do it. Obviously, being pregnant this was extra devastating to think about.
I popped into Toys R Us to check their sale rack on clothes and I picked out a few outfits for my little girl. I was just standing in the store crying thinking about holding her wearing those clothes and hoping she stays healthy enough to stay with us.
I've just about teared up every time I talk to DH and my boys on the phone this week. I miss them so much. I was not made to be a traveling mom - just a home body.
DS1 - 9/21/11
DS2 - 7/4/14
DS3 - 2/21/16 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Our family of 5 is complete!! Love our boys!
Today was super emotional for me. I cried like 3 times at work because I just wasn't feeling well (i blame the flu shot I got the morning). Then I cried because I felt bad about leaving work early. Finally I cried because the doctor I saw this morning (not my regular doc for some reason), told me I was gaining too fast, and I literally cried over having to eat super healthy. How ridiculous! I felt like an irrational toddler all day. Really really really hoping that this will not be a regular thing! There wasn't even any warning about the tears coming, they just started falling.
My husband did make me laugh by saying "at least you aren't an ugly crier!" Haha
Because after 2 weeks of calling best buy twice a week and multiple trips there my husband finally scored me a new rose gold iPhone 6s plus!! It's so pretty. He tricked me and said they didn't have any again and he was coming home. I cried when he gave it to me.
Then about an hour later I felt baby Benjamin move for the first time and I cried again.
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Because after 2 weeks of calling best buy twice a week and multiple trips there my husband finally scored me a new rose gold iPhone 6s plus!! It's so pretty. He tricked me and said they didn't have any again and he was coming home. I cried when he gave it to me.
Then about an hour later I felt baby Benjamin move for the first time and I cried again.
Both absolutely solid reasons to cry! The rose gold 6s is a beauty lol I'd cry too if DH surprised me with one. Benjamin is what I called a doll when I was little and I was sure I'd name a future DS that - love the name!!
Today I almost cried because I couldn't do a yoga pose. And then I had to tell myself to be kinder to myself, and I started crying. I'm glad nobody in class saw it!
I cried yesterday because I was feeling so good about how I was looking and feeling, then my mom decided to post a picture I felt was unflattering (I was making some strange face at one of my dogs).
I did this morning too but I have been crying my eyes out for the past week or so. My last miscarriage was 4 years ago- on Halloween. That's why I hate Halloween so much. I haven't gotten over it and I bawl my eyes out every time I think of it- even more so as the date draws nearer.
My doctor called me that day and said I was pregnant- but I had spotting and something didn't feel right. Back then it was a 45 minute trip to my doctor or a 20 minute trip to the ER, so we went there. The asshole doctor there kept pushing my buttons about How I was NOT pregnant, never was pregnant, and that it was all in my head- I wanted a baby so bad that I was experiencing a phantom pregnancy. No matter how many times I told him I didn't pee on a stick and walk in, that I had doctor confirmation that I was, he insisted I wasn't and my mind was playing tricks on me. He finally tossed a prescription at me and said I had a uti, and to go back and see my doctor because "I can't treat you for anything that isn't there." I left there scared and ashamed of myself, not having a CLUE as to what was going on. That night I miscarried; felt just like I was in labor all over again, and couldn't even leave the bathroom long enough to take my then 7 year old DD out trick-or-treating. Asshole...
I think what triggered this was my doctor asked me to sign a release for that hospital, so he could obtain records from there. I know he wanted them for my daughter's birth, and a couple nights I dreamt that my ob found documentation about a "phantom pregnancy" and questioned me about it. That is what has sent me off on this bawling spree- every time I think about it, I end up in a puddle on the floor.
February Siggy Challenge- Post pregnancy indulgences
@charley15, I'm so sorry you had to deal with a doctor like that. Sadly there are a bunch of people out there who are practicing medicine even though they have zero compassion or heart. My last miscarriage was last year on my daughter's birthday; we were away on vacation. The doctors at the local hospital were so lovely and compassionate it made dealing with everything a little easier and I returned home feeling that I would absolutely be a mother again. I had to follow up with the practice I'd used with DD but my fabulous OB had retired and I got stuck with a real beast. I went in sad but optimistic. In 15 minutes she had me in tears because, "I don't buy anything those other doctors told you. Your biggest issue with carrying to term is you wait until your almost 40 to decide to have a baby; what'd you expect?!" I told her if she read my file she'd know I hadn't waited for anything and basically told her she was heartless and where to go. I now have a wonderful new doctor and just as I knew a year ago, I'll be a mother again. Don't let the miserable people of the world rob you of the joy of your beautiful new blessing you are carrying. Hugs to you.
Thanks @maddynnugget. After that doctor I visited 4 or 5 others because I never got my AF back. They all told me it was in my head too and if I put my mind to losing weight, I could. I finally stumbled across this wonderful doctor I have now- he has been practicing FOREVER! He delivered my brother 25 years ago, did my mother's hysterectomy 11 years ago, and 3 years ago delivered my best friends baby. Over the past 2 years he has had me on letrazole and when that didnt work he did ovarian drilling, only to find endometriosis. After treating that for a year, bam- im pregnant! He is the best ever, and I hope he never retires (although all good things usually do come to an end...)!
February Siggy Challenge- Post pregnancy indulgences
Oh @charley15 I'm so sorry you had to deal with such awful doctors. Good thing is that at least you found a doctor that listens to you now. Creepy Internet hugz >:D<
Hugs to you, Charley! That's some awful bedside manner for sure.
I have two cries for today:
1. Today was the first day I posted a picture of myself (almost 18 weeks) to social media (other than TB). I have 3 friends that are pregnant and they are all slim and super precious with their bumps and I have felt like a dang whale in comparison. My husband has been struggling with me struggling with myself and it's really hurt him for me to be down on myself. He thinks I'm even more beautiful now that I'm growing his baby. ANYWAY I posted a little tidbit about how I'd originally decided not to post picture but that my daughter would be worth every bit of whatever my body does. SO many people told me I look great and cute etc. I know they're probably lying but it made me feel SO much better about myself.
2. Today was the first day I felt like my stomach was in the way. I was bumping into counters and opening cabinet doors into myself. I'm either completely unaware of my surroundings or I've grown a lot recently and hadn't noticed. Anyway, it was just a neat moment for me. I'm a FTM so I enjoy these silly little subtle things.
Today I cried because.. Last week I started developing a rash. Now it's on arms, tops of feet and it's so itchy and miserable! Benadryl and anti itch cream are my best friend but my fiancé was getting on to me about scratching and I turned into a bawling big baby. I hate hate being itchy. Thankful for a healthy little boy though
I cried today because today was my due date for the baby I miscarried back in March. I woke up during the night and was no settling me down for hours. I worry everday with this pregnancy and so thankful I'm having her and she is healthy so far.
Because of unnecessary conflict between my husband and dog. If my husband has ONE trait/habit that is negative it is his sudden anger at video games or sports. My dog's negative trait is reacting to his sudden outbursts with aggressive barking when she's in her crate (when she is out of her crate she just trembles).
Last Sunday and last night he and I were talking while he played a game on his phone. The dog was in her crate, which is in the same room. Something suddenly went downhill in the game so he started yelling at his phone. Of course the dog doesn't understand it's just because of a stupid game so she goes into defense mode and goes crazy barking (she had a very rough past before we rescued her and is protective of me and i think she believes his anger was at me). He actually gets offended by her reaction and yells at her and storms off to our bedroom, where he then spends over an hour or just goes to bed. So I start crying from the ridiculousness and frustration of the situation becuase there's nothing I can do. Then i cry more because my husband and I only have a couple hours at a time together a week and the last two times have been ruined with this nonsense.
I don't want to get nasty and tell him to stop playing the game because it i the ONE thing the poor man has as he works 14-15 hour days. It's his only "escape from work". The poor man doesn't even get any private time to recoup and relax right now unless I am on a night shift. He is super super stressed at his job and i think he is secretly still panicking about baby because of our previous loss. Part of me understands when he lashes out at the game and even though it's annoying it's whatever. It's just when the tension goes from the game to the dog that I get bent out of shape and super emotional. I keep thinking the dog will have to go, which isn't happening. I tend to find it amusing later because he doesn't realize that he and the dog are so alike in their personalities (crazy, I know).
I have just hit the phase of everything makes me want to cry so im sure this is just the beginning.
Ugh between not being able to find out the sex of our baby yesterday and finding out I have a low-lying placenta today, I'm trying really hard (but failing miserably) to not cry while at work.
February Siggy Challenge- Post pregnancy indulgences
I cried yesterday when I was walking around Boston and needed to pee really bad but a nasty Starbucks worker wouldn't let me use the bathroom. (Another worker said I could and gave me a code but this one kept pulling the door closed)
I watched that show Code Black and it makes me cry every episode but next week they will have an episode with a baby so I may have to skip it I don't think I'll handle it very well.
I watched that show Code Black and it makes me cry every episode but next week they will have an episode with a baby so I may have to skip it I don't think I'll handle it very well.
Code Black is my new favorite show! I've been watching it (and crying) every week! As far as medical accuracy goes, it gets most things pretty spot on. My husband gets so mad when I yell at the residents during the show, because they are being dumb or think it's the wrong diagnosis. I have to tell my self it's just a show...
March 2016 Moms: January Siggy Challenge "Pregnancy Problems"
I read this article
https://www.fox26houston.com/news/33590431-story
I feel like all women struggle with body positivity, especially during and after pregnancy so this was just really freaking sweet.
This made me tear up- Thanks lol
February Siggy Challenge- Post pregnancy indulgences
Today I cried because the stupid girl at the sandwich shop didn't put banana peppers on my tuna sandwich like I'd ordered and I didn't realize it until I got back to work. I have one tuna sandwich a week and since it's one of the few things that go down well for me I REALLY look forward to it every Friday, but it has to have banana peppers on it. I've never been so let down by a stupid sandwich or more mad at myself for getting down over something so trivial.
On the plus side, I guess, my aunt told me she once cried when she was pregnant with my cousin because her McDonald's ran out of something and she couldn't get her daily egg mc muffin so my overblown response to something so dumb is at least genetic lol.
At 17w 6d I felt the baby kick from the outside for the first time! Earlier then I expected based on previous pregnancy so it was a very pleasant surprise. Definitely made me cry a little.
I made the ill-advised decision recently to start watching Call the Midwife. I love it, but I basically cry every episode. I blamed my pregnancy hormones and the stories just being too close to home, but my cousin (not pregnant) who recommended the show said she cries every episode too. So I guess it's just an emotional show!
Cried at work today in a conference room after fighting with husband over the phone. We currently have two homes and two mortgages-trying to sell one that was a rental property. It's a topic we always fight about. Thankfully, it ended up being a friend at work that walked in on me. In the afternoon I got called into an executives office to inform me I will NOT be a part of the 10k people getting laid off from our company. So thankful to be in a secure role and can go back to planning my paid maternity leave! I'm worn out from all the drama. Now I'm going to get myself Mexican to celebrate.
Cried at work today in a conference room after fighting with husband over the phone. We currently have two homes and two mortgages-trying to sell one that was a rental property. It's a topic we always fight about. Thankfully, it ended up being a friend at work that walked in on me. In the afternoon I got called into an executives office to inform me I will NOT be a part of the 10k people getting laid off from our company. So thankful to be in a secure role and can go back to planning my paid maternity leave! I'm worn out from all the drama. Now I'm going to get myself Mexican to celebrate.
Ugh we had a rental property in the ghetto and trying to get it sold without getting broken into was a freaking nightmare. I feel for you, I wouldn't wish what we went through on anyone.
BFP 2/11/15 (EDD 10/13/15). MMC 3/30/15 D&C 4/3/15 "We will always love you"
DD1 - BFP 7/23/15 (EDD 3/31/16). "We believe in you rainbow" DOB 4/2/16
DD2 - BFP 2/9/18 (EDD 10/19/18). "Grow baby grow!" DOB 10/24/18
BFP 11/16/20 (EDD 7/31/21). "Round 3 FIGHT!"
Today I cried because my fiance was putting a towel on the towel rack in the bathroom and the towel rack fell. Just the bar, it is a totally fixable thing in like two seconds, And I had to cry about it.
I made the ill-advised decision recently to start watching Call the Midwife. I love it, but I basically cry every episode. I blamed my pregnancy hormones and the stories just being too close to home, but my cousin (not pregnant) who recommended the show said she cries every episode too. So I guess it's just an emotional show!
Omg I love this show! I cried while watching great American food truck rave while they were saying their background stories..
Re: Today I cried because...
This is not a happy TICB: A friend of mine lost her little niece yesterday. She was born 20 weeks early and her little body just couldn't do it. Obviously, being pregnant this was extra devastating to think about.
I popped into Toys R Us to check their sale rack on clothes and I picked out a few outfits for my little girl. I was just standing in the store crying thinking about holding her wearing those clothes and hoping she stays healthy enough to stay with us.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our family of 5 is complete!! Love our boys!
I cried like 3 times at work because I just wasn't feeling well (i blame the flu shot I got the morning). Then I cried because I felt bad about leaving work early.
Finally I cried because the doctor I saw this morning (not my regular doc for some reason), told me I was gaining too fast, and I literally cried over having to eat super healthy. How ridiculous!
I felt like an irrational toddler all day. Really really really hoping that this will not be a regular thing! There wasn't even any warning about the tears coming, they just started falling.
My husband did make me laugh by saying "at least you aren't an ugly crier!" Haha
Then about an hour later I felt baby Benjamin move for the first time and I cried again.
Me: 29 DH: 31
Married 10/13/12
TTC Since 8/2016
I did this morning too but I have been crying my eyes out for the past week or so. My last miscarriage was 4 years ago- on Halloween. That's why I hate Halloween so much. I haven't gotten over it and I bawl my eyes out every time I think of it- even more so as the date draws nearer.
My doctor called me that day and said I was pregnant- but I had spotting and something didn't feel right. Back then it was a 45 minute trip to my doctor or a 20 minute trip to the ER, so we went there. The asshole doctor there kept pushing my buttons about How I was NOT pregnant, never was pregnant, and that it was all in my head- I wanted a baby so bad that I was experiencing a phantom pregnancy. No matter how many times I told him I didn't pee on a stick and walk in, that I had doctor confirmation that I was, he insisted I wasn't and my mind was playing tricks on me. He finally tossed a prescription at me and said I had a uti, and to go back and see my doctor because "I can't treat you for anything that isn't there." I left there scared and ashamed of myself, not having a CLUE as to what was going on. That night I miscarried; felt just like I was in labor all over again, and couldn't even leave the bathroom long enough to take my then 7 year old DD out trick-or-treating. Asshole...
I think what triggered this was my doctor asked me to sign a release for that hospital, so he could obtain records from there. I know he wanted them for my daughter's birth, and a couple nights I dreamt that my ob found documentation about a "phantom pregnancy" and questioned me about it. That is what has sent me off on this bawling spree- every time I think about it, I end up in a puddle on the floor.
This is what made me cry right now. I've never even struggled with infertility, but it got me right in the feels.
Last Sunday and last night he and I were talking while he played a game on his phone. The dog was in her crate, which is in the same room. Something suddenly went downhill in the game so he started yelling at his phone. Of course the dog doesn't understand it's just because of a stupid game so she goes into defense mode and goes crazy barking (she had a very rough past before we rescued her and is protective of me and i think she believes his anger was at me). He actually gets offended by her reaction and yells at her and storms off to our bedroom, where he then spends over an hour or just goes to bed. So I start crying from the ridiculousness and frustration of the situation becuase there's nothing I can do. Then i cry more because my husband and I only have a couple hours at a time together a week and the last two times have been ruined with this nonsense.
I don't want to get nasty and tell him to stop playing the game because it i the ONE thing the poor man has as he works 14-15 hour days. It's his only "escape from work". The poor man doesn't even get any private time to recoup and relax right now unless I am on a night shift. He is super super stressed at his job and i think he is secretly still panicking about baby because of our previous loss. Part of me understands when he lashes out at the game and even though it's annoying it's whatever. It's just when the tension goes from the game to the dog that I get bent out of shape and super emotional. I keep thinking the dog will have to go, which isn't happening. I tend to find it amusing later because he doesn't realize that he and the dog are so alike in their personalities (crazy, I know).
I have just hit the phase of everything makes me want to cry so im sure this is just the beginning.
March 2016 Moms: January Siggy Challenge "Pregnancy Problems"
https://www.fox26houston.com/news/33590431-story
I feel like all women struggle with body positivity, especially during and after pregnancy so this was just really freaking sweet.
On the plus side, I guess, my aunt told me she once cried when she was pregnant with my cousin because her McDonald's ran out of something and she couldn't get her daily egg mc muffin so my overblown response to something so dumb is at least genetic lol.
Me: 29 DH: 31
Married 10/13/12
TTC Since 8/2016
DD1 - BFP 7/23/15 (EDD 3/31/16). "We believe in you rainbow" DOB 4/2/16
DD2 - BFP 2/9/18 (EDD 10/19/18). "Grow baby grow!" DOB 10/24/18
BFP 11/16/20 (EDD 7/31/21). "Round 3 FIGHT!"