February 2015 Moms

Would a shower be tacky?

13567

Re: Would a shower be tacky?

  • HeyStVincentHeyStVincent member
    edited August 2014
    I feel like I've been living under a rock for my entire life.

    I agree with your thoughts about more cake @jennwilhoite!
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  • MrsMuq said:
    I had my first shower 10 years ago. I finally accepted that we were done having kids about 2 years ago and started giving away all of my baby stuff. Then BAM, surprise pregnancy! My friend really wants to throw me a shower and when she mentioned it to me, I said no, that would be tacky. She still wants to do it and my husband is of course on board so we don't have to make so many purchases.

    What do you think??
    I just can't. :-??
    You just can't...what exactly?

      ~~~Big brother 11.29.05 & Little Brother 6.18.09~~~  
    Pregnancy%20ticker
  • I'm having my second child and we are doing a baby shower! I say go for it ten years is a big age gap so might as well! My oldest is 5 but my husband isn't his biological dad so this is his first starting from the pregnancy stage and on so we are definitly having one with our family and friends! I also had my son when I was 17 so i didn't keep any of his things. We weren't going to have kids until a few years from now but we have a surprise baby now!!
  • I am in the same boat as you but I just had a baby 2 1/2 years ago!!! My friends are begging me to let them throw me a shower!! I feel bad about it but they keep saying this baby deserves as much love and attention as your first! I think if you are not throwing it for yourself then everyone will understand.
  • Amen! It IS about the baby!! All these ridiculous answers by some of these women make me sick. Thank you for putting it in perspective :)
  • Seriously? Why are people always looking for a "rule". Have your shower! It's a celebration of your baby. There are enough rules in life to follow without trying to stick a statute on something as beautiful as the birth of a new life! One lady posted that she flat out refuses to go to second showers. I'm willing to bet money that she is the type of chick who would be offended if she didn't receive an invite to a second shower (mostly because it would rob her of the opportunity to decline and opine that second showers are tacky, thereby making the expecting momma feel like crap, because, you know, that's really beneficial!?!?!).

    Bottom line is, your FRIEND, out of the kindness of her heart, wants to throw you a shower. Accept it. She is your FRIEND. The women posting these ridiculous opinions couldn't care less about your baby, your financial situation, how a shower would benefit you or your baby, etc. All they care about is voicing their snarky opinions while hoping to add their own subsection to the statute on child bearing in the book of universal rules that, I assure you, does NOT exist :)
  • Really? I bet you ladies are all for second bachelorette parties though huh? Second weddings too. :-@
  • Izzy0927 said:

    I don't understand why people get so passionate about this. Oh, you are passionate about etiquette? Then it probably would be best if we all remember the number one rule of etiquette: The only thing ruder than rudeness is pointing out said rudeness.
    Eta: there's nothing classy or tasteful about screaming "tacky" all over someone else's choices.

    Yes Ma'am! Couldn't have said it better!
  • Ducktale said:

    Two things. 


    This better be the last fucking time we discuss this. Stop trying to make yourself (general you) feel better for wanting a second shower. 

    The one good thing about this thread are all the visitors. Come play more!
    Ooh another moderator! One that curses too! My favorite :)

    1. If you did not start the post, GFY
    2. This is why I've stayed away from these forums. At first glance you think it's a bunch of glowing pregnant women bonding over child related subjects. Then you realize it's mostly a bunch of foul mouthed, hateful, snarky cows looking to project their shit on someone else.
    3. Stop trying to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel bad. You're fucking despicable and I'm glad I don't know you.

    Matter of fact, I'm getting rid of this app. If I wanted to read shit posted by venomous cunts I'd go over to Scary Mommy. At least there it's not only expected but also humorous. Here it's just plain sad.

  • Darbie914 said:


    Izzy0927 said:


    I don't understand why people get so passionate about this. Oh, you are passionate about etiquette? Then it probably would be best if we all remember the number one rule of etiquette: The only thing ruder than rudeness is pointing out said rudeness.
    Eta: there's nothing classy or tasteful about screaming "tacky" all over someone else's choices.





    Um, did you read the OP?  She asked for opinions.  You ask, you get.

    Get over it.


    I hadn't realized that an opinion needed to be posted multiple times in order to be a valid opinion. But I assure you, I have nothing to get over.
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    Married August 2009

    BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14

    BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow

  • Two things. 

    This better be the last fucking time we discuss this. Stop trying to make yourself (general you) feel better for wanting a second shower. 

    The one good thing about this thread are all the visitors. Come play more!
    Ooh another moderator! One that curses too! My favorite :) 1. If you did not start the post, GFY 2. This is why I've stayed away from these forums. At first glance you think it's a bunch of glowing pregnant women bonding over child related subjects. Then you realize it's mostly a bunch of foul mouthed, hateful, snarky cows looking to project their shit on someone else. 3. Stop trying to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel bad. You're fucking despicable and I'm glad I don't know you. Matter of fact, I'm getting rid of this app. If I wanted to read shit posted by venomous cunts I'd go over to Scary Mommy. At least there it's not only expected but also humorous. Here it's just plain sad.

    Peace out Girl Scout.
  • Two things. 

    This better be the last fucking time we discuss this. Stop trying to make yourself (general you) feel better for wanting a second shower. 

    The one good thing about this thread are all the visitors. Come play more!
    Ooh another moderator! One that curses too! My favorite :) 1. If you did not start the post, GFY 2. This is why I've stayed away from these forums. At first glance you think it's a bunch of glowing pregnant women bonding over child related subjects. Then you realize it's mostly a bunch of foul mouthed, hateful, snarky cows looking to project their shit on someone else. 3. Stop trying to make yourself feel better by making someone else feel bad. You're fucking despicable and I'm glad I don't know you. Matter of fact, I'm getting rid of this app. If I wanted to read shit posted by venomous cunts I'd go over to Scary Mommy. At least there it's not only expected but also humorous. Here it's just plain sad.
    Bye Felcia
    https://24.media.tumblr.com/63b49f6a962c19e6299403a406acb3ac/tumblr_mwtco7Tntn1qde4uko1_500.gif

    Also, I'm not glowing. Is that normal? Guys, are we vipers or cows? I can't keep up....
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic

    Married August 2009

    BFP#1 12/19/13 * EDD 8/24/14 * MMC Discovered 2/04/14

    BFP#2 5/27/14 * EDD 2/8/15 * Please be our rainbow

  • @Izzy0927‌ - I feel like a damn sausage. So I guess that makes me a dead and unglowy cow.
    Me: 38     DH: 36
    Married: July 21, 2013
    TTC#1 (between us): June/July 2013

    DX: MFI (low count and motility)
    Charting/OPK/CBFM July 2013-present
    1st RE Visit: January 2014
    Cycling: 
    March 2014- 75iu follistim + trigger + progesterone + IUI = BFN and OHSS
    (8 million post wash 47% motility, 18mm/17mm/16mm/16mm/14mm follies)
    April/May 2014- Benched due to cysts/enlarged ovaries
    June 2014- 50iu follistim + trigger + progesterone + IUI = BFP!!
    (10 million post wash 60% motility, 20mm/19mm follies)
    Beta 1- 85 Beta 2- 2,752 - EDD 2/27/2015


    Everyone welcome. Strength in numbers!


  • Im sorry.. I don't feel its tacky at all.. If your friend wants to throw it.. By all means let her.. Now if you were throwing it for yourself.. Yes tacky.. Showers have always been a part of having a baby.. Just like a bridal shower ect.. I don't understand how this became tacky.. If your friends are excited for you and with you and want to have fun and suppose you with a party and gifts to celebrate your new little one.. Why not?? Heck I'm hoping my girls throw me one.. Good luck..
  • Oops.. Surprise you...
  • LOL Im so confused... who is Ylichaleff and what exactly is the point she is trying to make. 

    Anyway... @ChickenonSunday I think the second wedding reference was sarcasm. I think the point was to try to say that those women who dont agree with 2nd showers also dont think 2nd weddings should be allowed either. 

    But who the hell knows... 
    *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
    Waited a long time, tried a lot of stuff, science made me a mom.
     Loss and IF veteran. Current mom of DS 5.5, DD 2, and sometimes DH 40. Due June 2021 with TWINS
  • I apologize for starting this debacle. I am a little rusty on my bump knowledge. ;) Thank you all for your opinions.

    I think I will stick with my gut and tell my friend that I don't feel comfortable being a part of a 2nd shower. Besides, being the center of attention is just about the furthest thing from fun I can think of.

    Have a great day ladies!!

      ~~~Big brother 11.29.05 & Little Brother 6.18.09~~~  
    Pregnancy%20ticker


  • MrsMuq said:



    I had my first shower 10 years ago. I finally accepted that we were done having kids about 2 years ago and started giving away all of my baby stuff. Then BAM, surprise pregnancy! My friend really wants to throw me a shower and when she mentioned it to me, I said no, that would be tacky. She still wants to do it and my husband is of course on board so we don't have to make so many purchases.

    What do you think??

    I just can't. :-??

    You just can't...what exactly?


    Anniversary 

  • I always miss all the fun! Damn time differences and sleeping in!

    Anyway:
  • My mom has huge spaces in between her kids. We are 33,31 (me), 23 and 12. She had a shower thrown for her for all but me because the 23 year old was a second marriage and his fam threw it. 11 years later when she had a surprise pregnancy we threw her one as well because it had been such a long time. She did not register and had zero expectations as she didn't want us to do it. But 11 years is a huge chunk of time between kids. I say let your friend do this for you but let her know that you are a bit uncomfortable about it and that you don't want to register anywhere and prefer it to be focused more as a social event vs gift giving.
  • I stopped reading this thread because I was bored with the same story..... Now I see I missed all the fun! Looks like I have 5 pages to read tonight haha \:D/
  • KrisTatum said:
    I stopped reading this thread because I was bored with the same story..... Now I see I missed all the fun! Looks like I have 5 pages to read tonight haha \:D/
    I'm with you! But after I saw 5 pages of comments I knew it was drama filled and I couldn't stay away.  It's a like a trainwreck...I just can't look away.
  • I'm a first time mom and I say if y'all wanna have another shower have another shower! It's not about how it looks on you or your husband it's about making sure the baby has everything it needs to grow. If don't have a lot of baby stuff anymore then have a shower. Me and my husband agreed that even if we have a second or third kid we are still having a baby shower and maybe not just all gifts maybe just a few gifts that are very needed and just gathering of family and friends for support.
  • A baby shower is NOT to welcome a mom to motherhood. A mom is welcomed to motherhood when she finds out she's pregnant a baby shower is everyone around you and yourself welcoming that baby to the world and a father is welcomed to fatherhood when he sees his baby. The baby shower is NOT about the mom at all it's about the baby!
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