Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Longest Thread EVER! (aka Random Thoughts Thread )
I'm a totally Type A myself, so it took me awhile to let go of control over how/when my baby was going to come into the world. But you're in good hands. My nurse put it this way: if something DID go wrong, you are in the right place at the right time. These doctors and nurses are there to take care of you and your baby--you don't need to do it alone
PoppySeedWindsor I am so sorry you are so stressed out and your mind is getting the best of you! You will be able to get through this and need to focus on the positive!! No one knows how their birth will go, whether they do it naturally from the beginning OR get induced. Almost 1/3 of births are c-sections (IF it even comes to that)....which means doctors are REALLY good at them. They are so standard and normal. It will be ok, no matter what your birth story is
and you get to see baby poppy soooo soon!
Remember irrational fears...are just that. Irrational
and somehow they only seem to come on late at night...when you are sleep deprived and exhausted.
I can definitely relate to being in an environment that doesn't support the hippie in you! We moved from a liberal town outside DC to a small town in NC. My natural ways and liberal beliefs are definitely not the norm here and I'm struggling to find people I can connect with.
Thankfully there is a birth center 20 minutes away but if that wasn't there I'd have almost no choice on how and where I birthed this baby. I'm glad you have a supportive OB and hopefully you'll be able to feel free to continue with what works best for you!
@kseccomb17 So much love to you, hon. Agree with getting people around you. People made all the difference when DH's mom was dying and we were in the hospital every day. Not the same thing, I know, but I know how draining it is so split your life between hospital and the "real world." It can be so overwhelming and the pain can be so huge that you don't even know how to verbalize what you need. If that's where you are, tell people that are close to you that you need them to either offer specific help (hearing "let me know if there's anything I can do," is nice, but not very helpful when it puts the burden on you to come up with something for them to do) or just show up and take care of things, like your kids, your house, etc.
With your background you have to also prioritize yourself. It's tempting to try and take care of everyone else first, but make time for your appointments and make sure you're doing what you need to do to keep yourself balanced. This isn't the time to try and power through, this is about doing what it takes to get yourself through the day and leave you sane and coping at the end of it. Get meds, get help, get therapy, whatever you need; make it a priority. Put your own gas mask on first.
Also, my friend is a social worker at Stanford hospital, and her whole job is to help families/people in your type of traumatic situation. All hospitals have them, but few people know to utilize them. Contact your hospital's social worker - they are amazing resources for help, support, financial guidance, anything you need to help you navigate this tough time.
Going though what my husband and I went through these last two months, I called it a crucible - these are the times that can either break a marriage or that you'll look back on, years down the road, and say, "well, it was hell, but it made us who we are today and I wouldn't trade it." You'll all come through this, I'm sure. I'm still praying for you, hon. Hang in there.
@PoppySeedWindsor Everyone else said what I was going to say, so I'll just say this: it's going to be okay, my dear.
Baby Girl Born: April 2014
If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you:
Baby Girl Born: April 2014
If you ask me what I came to do in this world, I, an artist, I will answer you:
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Can it also perform membrane sweeps? I'd much prefer being medically finger banged by a laser robot than my midwife. Oy.
BFP #1 May 20, 2013 MC June 27, 2013 BFP #2 August 2, 2013 Baby Boy born 4/25/14 (3 weeks overdue!)
April 14 August Siggy Challenge- "This time last year.."
I also had a dream that I was cloth diapering my own body and was trying to find my swim diaper so I could go into the pool.
Somebody. Get. This. Baby. OUT OF ME!!!!!
BFP #1 May 20, 2013 MC June 27, 2013 BFP #2 August 2, 2013 Baby Boy born 4/25/14 (3 weeks overdue!)
April 14 August Siggy Challenge- "This time last year.."
BFP #1 May 20, 2013 MC June 27, 2013 BFP #2 August 2, 2013 Baby Boy born 4/25/14 (3 weeks overdue!)
April 14 August Siggy Challenge- "This time last year.."
Dear lord, I love my DH.
Using new, organic, fancy face wipes (I had a coupon!) then finding you're allergic to them. I don't even know what caused the reaction- none of my known allergens are in it!
My face is on fire.
Jussssssst what I needed.
BFP #1 May 20, 2013 MC June 27, 2013 BFP #2 August 2, 2013 Baby Boy born 4/25/14 (3 weeks overdue!)
April 14 August Siggy Challenge- "This time last year.."
Edit because iPhone doesn't think boppy is a word