Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
KatzKiss
member
Re: My Brand New Vagina! Long rant and PSA.
Baby Boy due October 2017
ETA - And "husband" stitches?? That just pisses me off more.
Just reviewed him on Healthgrades and Ratemds.
Also, husband stitches? Fucking bullshit.
April 2013: Femara + Trigger + IUI = ???
EDD- 06/13/2017
**Stinkerbelle-8-27-10 * Mr.P's 2nd Mama 7-27-07**
Did your MD specifically tell you he gave you "husband stiches"?
DS: 10-9-14
MC: 9-4-16
No he never said that specifically. That is just the term that is used when a woman is stitched that high.
I am truly sorry that you are going through this and I truly hope it was a fusion of a laceration and not that you were actually stitched that high. It is not uncommon to have lacerations on both of your labia that fuse together as they heal leaving you an extremely small opening...It is rare but it happens
I am sure that you have been through a long road of estrogen creams and I am glad that you have a vagina that came be used again.
ETA: I just saw your second comment. If he, in any way, shape, or form intentionally left you with such a small opening for you vagina I will hold him down so you can sew the tip of his penis to his ball sack. I think then you will be square.
OP - I'm so sorry this happened to you! I'm glad you were able to have this treated so that you can get back to living normally.
We considered hopping onto the lawsuit I mentioned previously. However, it was too late. The case was closed. We also can't really afford a lawyer right now and we have no idea where he is. I'm hoping his license was revoked.
***DD 5/15/2004***TTC #2 Since March 2012***Severe MFI*** LameBlog ***
We considered hopping onto the lawsuit I mentioned previously. However, it was too late. The case was closed. We also can't really afford a lawyer right now and we have no idea where he is. I'm hoping his license was revoked.
I don't know if it's different in the States but I believe you have 2 years to take action. Also a lot of lawyers will take the case on a contingency fee, which means they get paid a percentage of whatever settlement you receive. Also they can hire people to find him and serve him. I would seriously look into it, this guy deserves to pay.
I'm so sorry this happened to you-that is a true nightmare.
Good idea! I will do that today.
TTC since August 2011, Me = 40, DH = 38
Unexplained IF. Tried Clomid for 3 cycles. All BFNs. BFP 1/6/13. Chemical pregnancy.
Moving on to IVF#1. ER 11/26/13, 16 eggs retreived, 12 mature and all fertilized. 2 blasts transferred on 12/1. All other embies arrested so nothing left to freeze. Beta 12/10 = BFN. IVF #2 March 2014. BFP!!! TEAM BLUE!!!
Oh wow...I am horrified that this happened to you, and truly sorry! Thank you for making us aware of this, because I will be looking more carefully into OBs when/if I do get pregnant.
Do what other PPs said. At least have an initial consult with an attourney to weigh your options. Keep us updated if you do!
Married 7/21/12
Off bcp and ttc 9/1/13
bfp 7/20/14, m/c 7/23
will ttc again 8/14
I don't think he's in the state anymore but I'm determined to track him down and file a complaint. My sick day project!
You should still file the complaint with the medical board in your state. If he moved out of state the medical board in the other state most likely will not have the resources to investigate a complaint of actions in another state. It's also questionable whether the other board would have jurisdiction considering he wouldn't have been practicing under the license granted by the other state, he was practicing under the license granted by your state. So file a complaint with the medical board in your state. If that board takes action then the other state can take reciprocal action. If you want to though you could still file a complaint with the out of state board so they know what a dickhead this guy is but it most likely won't result in disciplinary action.
And I should have said it in my first post, I'm so sorry this happened to you.
TTC since August 2011, Me = 40, DH = 38
Unexplained IF. Tried Clomid for 3 cycles. All BFNs. BFP 1/6/13. Chemical pregnancy.
Moving on to IVF#1. ER 11/26/13, 16 eggs retreived, 12 mature and all fertilized. 2 blasts transferred on 12/1. All other embies arrested so nothing left to freeze. Beta 12/10 = BFN. IVF #2 March 2014. BFP!!! TEAM BLUE!!!
TTC since August 2011, Me = 40, DH = 38
Unexplained IF. Tried Clomid for 3 cycles. All BFNs. BFP 1/6/13. Chemical pregnancy.
Moving on to IVF#1. ER 11/26/13, 16 eggs retreived, 12 mature and all fertilized. 2 blasts transferred on 12/1. All other embies arrested so nothing left to freeze. Beta 12/10 = BFN. IVF #2 March 2014. BFP!!! TEAM BLUE!!!
This isn't my complaint. I just thought it as interesting. BTW, I know his wife. She is a sweetheart. He also has six kids. What a pig!
TTC #1 8/2012~Chronic Pelvic Pain Condition began 10/2012~Told I was crazy by many doctors until a good specialist DXed a labral tear and bone impingement in left hip 4/2013~Surgery on left hip: 5/31/13 SUCCESS!!! Pain flares to continue indefinitely (but mostly gone).
Resumed TTC 6/2013~Chronic stomach pain and distension: 8/2013~TTA 1/2014 Until Resolved ~7/2014: Trip to the Mayo Clinic--SUCCESS!! Finally on the road to getting better.
Resumed TTC 7/2014! Third time's the charm....8/2014 Visited the RE~DX: MFI/low morph~Straight to IVF with ICSI! 9/2014~Transferred 1 perfect beautiful 6AA blast with 10 to freeze!!!~10/8/2014: BFP!!!! EDD: 6/17/15 STICK LITTLE BEAN!!! IT'S A BOY!!!!!