Hey there Mey.. I am hispanic too and my Dh is white..so he doenst understand alot of the traditions I have grown up with either.. but yes, I will have Godparents for our child.. whenever he decides to come..
I'm glad you can relate. We usually don't have a lot of difference in culture, because I've become very Americanize but I wish he'd understand more why some things are important to me.
Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.
This isn't true. I just went to a catholic baptism for a family friend's baby. The parents were not even married by a catholic priest. (They were married by the bride's brother who got certified over the internet!) The rule is one of the two godparents needs to be a baptized catholic. Neither of them need to be married, and one of them can even be of another religion.
We're catholic. We'll be having godparents.
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I'm ok with no baptizing, that's fine by me, just as long as they do have Godparents who will play an important role in their lives, then I could let the baptizing go.
Our children will have godparents, but whomever they are, most likely the godparents won't be the people who will take our kids if we die. I'm Catholic, and was raised that way, but I'm the only one in my family who's still practicing. We'll ask our Catholic friends to be godparents, but someone in the family will take the children if ever necessary.
Maybe you could explain to YH you want to do it because of your heritage not because of religion.
Ours will not. I grew up without a religious background and DH grew up catholic, but has grown to be more agnostic.
Traditionally Godparents are basically responsible for ensuring the child's religious education is carried out, and for caring for the child if something happened to the parents. But anymore, Godparents are more of an extra special "aunt" or "uncle"
According to the Catholic Church, from what I was taught, Godparents are ONLY for assisting in the religious education and guidance of the child. It is not for caring for the child if something happens. That is why you can have Godparents that aren't married. Godparents have no legal rights. You have to designate who will raise them if something happens to their parents in your will.
Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.
This isn't true. I just went to a catholic baptism for a family friend's baby. The parents were not even married by a catholic priest. (They were married by the bride's brother who got certified over the internet!) The rule is one of the two godparents needs to be a baptized catholic. Neither of them need to be married, and one of them can even be of another religion.
We're catholic. We'll be having godparents.
Godparents- Sponsors (godparents) and parents present the infant for Baptism. The role of the sponsor is to help the baptized person to lead a Christian life and to fulfill the obligations connected with it. The Church has established the following requirements for sponsors (Godparents):
1. Sixteen years of age or older.
2. Must have received the Sacraments of Initiation, namely Baptism, Confirmation, and Eucharist.
3. If married, marriage must have been witnessed by a Catholic priest or by special exception approved by the Archbishop.
4. Presently active in the practice of the Faith by celebrating the Eucharist and receiving the sacraments regularly.
If you cannot sign a statement swearing that the above four requirements are true, you are not eligible in Canon Law to stand as a sponsor, and cannot be given an Eligibility Certificate by the Pastor or DRE.
Note: Only one sponsor is necessary, however if there are twosponsors, they should be of different genders. A baptized Christianwitness may take the place of the second sponsor but he/she mustbe a practicing member of a Christian church.
Letter of Eligibility- Sponsors from parishes other than St.Basil's are requested to present a certificate of eligibilityissued by their parish.
These are the Godparents/Sponsor guidlines from my parish website/handbook. Like I said I don't know if this is an across the board requirement or just my Parish
My DH is kinda atheist and I am Catholic and do have God parents, so does my DS and our future children will also have them! I am hispanic also and it is a huge part of our culture or maybe in our family!
Hey there Mey.. I am hispanic too and my Dh is white..so he doenst understand alot of the traditions I have grown up with either.. but yes, I will have Godparents for our child.. whenever he decides to come..
I'm glad you can relate. We usually don't have a lot of difference in culture, because I've become very Americanize but I wish he'd understand more why some things are important to me.
My DH is Chinese and we have the same issue as you ladies I am Hispanic... But my DH just goes with the flow!
We are practicing Catholics and will have Godparents.
DH adn I have each been Godparents three times and have only one time been asked to produce a letter stating that we attended church (from our current church). I think that although guidelines exist about being a practicing member of the religion the child is being baptised in or having your marriage be done/witnessed by a priest I think that many churches do not do any follow up on if the Godparents have met these requirements.
TTC #2 since April 2012
Year 1 - nothing
Year 2 - two m/c
Year 3 - unexplained diagnosis & 4 failed IUIs with
Clomid/Letrozole
Year 4 - still unexplained & 3 failed IUIs with
Follistim & Ovidral
rr - i see what you are saying, one way to get around this if you are comfortable with it is to just assign ONE godparent, say the woman... at least as far as the church is concerned, then she won't have to prove she is married. The husband can still be the godfather according to your family, KWIM?
**** TW - kids and loss mentioned **** ~~ married 8.11.07 ~~ DD1 1.16.11 ~~ DD2 1.3.14 ~~ ~~ BFP3 12.22.15 MMC 2.29.16 @ 13 weeks ~~ ~~ 2 D&Cs (3.1.16 and 3.10.16) for MMC ~~ BFP4 10.27.16 MMC 1.23.17 @ 16 weeks ~~ D&E 1.26.17 ~~
Hellz yes we will! If I ever get a BFP! We are both Catholic tho we dont go to church every Sunday. Mostly holidays and once in a while, we do agree on once we having kids making sure to go to Church more.
I don't think ours will. DH was raised without religious background (but was exposed to lots of spirituality), and I was raised Christian, but have become more agnostic as I've grown older.
rr - i see what you are saying, one way to get around this if you are comfortable with it is to just assign ONE godparent, say the woman... at least as far as the church is concerned, then she won't have to prove she is married. The husband can still be the godfather according to your family, KWIM?
KWIM??
Thats a good idea and I would be more than comfortable doing it the way you suggested, as its our sisters. I also have a very hard time with spouses being Godparents, because of my own personal/family experiences. I don't have anything against this for anyone else!!
It's something that we have to discuss. My IL are pretty much the deciding factor and me being Catholic means nothing to them. They are the only ones that matter, kind of mentality.
I am Jewish and DH is Catholic. I don't think we'll have godparents. DH grew up with them but was only close with his godmother (aunt). I would prefer not to do this. We will not baptize the baby. There is a Jewish naming ceremony and I'm hoping that DH will agree to modify this so that we have a way to welcome the baby to the family/world without it being religious.
Not being baptized is a point of contention with my ILs. Oh well.
I grew up Catholic, but do not practice actively. Our children will have godparents, but not for religious reasons. I was very close with my godparents growing up, and I think that it's an important relationship for children to have. I plan to ask my best friend and her husband when the time comes.
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absolutely.. its a great thing for your children to have another ,motherly and fatherly figure in their life (god forbid something happens to you)
____________________________________________________________________________
*4 angel babies in heaven*__
*DX with Progesterone defficiency June 2010*
*Haylie Marie & Makenzie Shayanne adopted November 2010*
**SURPRISE! !ALL NATURAL MIRACLE BFP!!12/26/10 (MERRY CHRISTMAS)**
***Alexander Robert born 8/20/11, 11:01pm, 8lbs. 2oz. 20.5inches***
**BFP 06/26/2012.. Baby B #2 Due 04/01/2013**
Our problem comes with the fact that I'm Catholic and hes Lutheran. If we baptize in the Catholic faith the Godparents if married (as all possibilities are) the marriage has to have been witnessed by a Catholic priest (which non have been). We can get an exception granted by the Archbishop, but I'm not sure what requirements are needed for an exception.
If anyone knows I would love to know!
Funny you ask this today because last night my SIL forgave me for not including them in whether or not we are TTC and just asked if she and her hubs could be Godparents when the blessed event happen. I explained this to her and she is not talking to me again
This depends on the parish. This was one of the first things I asked about when we were getting married. Just a quick background...I was previously married, we needed an annulment to get married in the Catholic church. They (of course) dragged their feet with the processing so DH and I got married outside the Church. We will have the marriage blessed if and when the Catholic church ever decides that I am worthy. In the meantime, I asked the priest of DH's parish about our future children and godparents. There is absolutely no way that DH's irresponsible sister would be made a godmother over my non-Catholic sister. He told me that as long as one of the godparents is Catholic, the other does not have to be, and that they could both be godparents.
These will probably be separate from the guardians of our children. The legal guardians will most likely be my sister and her DH. DH and I are the guardians of their new son and any other children that they have.
ETA: My sister is married and it was not witness by a Catholic priest. It really does depend on the parish, not the written laws of the Catholic church. They are up to interpretation depending upon how liberal or conservative the parish is.
I had godparents (they both passed in a car accident when I was little...another story). My husband has godparents...along with every child that is born in either of our families!!
So...yes, my children will have godparents!! I think it's a great tradition and bonding throughout the families!!
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I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. I am from Brazil and I have godparents. Although I am not Catholic, I told my DH that I wanted out child to have godparents. He told me it was pointless and that we weren't Catholic, so why bother.
The way I put it was that if it didn't mean anything to him, but it had meaning to me, then he shouldn't mind it at all. I love my godparents and I want my child to have that same bond that I had. Although it is a Catholic tradition, it is also cultural because so many in Brazil ARE Catholic. I don't know where your family is originally from, but I am guessing that it is the same circumstance there. If you feel the need for your child to have that relationship, I say go for it. I also have adopted American traditions for DH and he can just deal with this one.
My husband has godparents and I don't, we both grew up Christian and are still practicing Christians, and for him it was just a different word for guardians, so we aren't having actual godparents, just guardians.
Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010
natural m/c March 11, 2011 at 8 1/2 weeks
Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012
Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks
Daughter #3 - January 19, 2014
Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012. We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!
Well it is to my understanding that godparents is a relgious(catholic) thing. DH come from a catholic family but neither one of us have choosen a religion yet. We did ask my brother and his wife to be the ones to take our children in case anything were to ever happen to us. So I guess in a way they are the godparents just without the title
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When my future sister-in-law told me that she wanted me and her brother (my now husband, we were not married yet) it meant so much to me. To me, it meant that she already saw me as her sister and her son's aunt, even though I was not married into their family yet.
Godparents are very important to the life of a child, we are there to guide and lead. We are not just there for religious reasons. I consider myself and my husband to be more than just his aunt and uncle.
She and her husband will be godparents of our children, along with my sister and her husband, one day. So actually our children will hopefully have twice as many godparents, and be twice as loved!
i was brought up catholic, but i never had any Godparents. Personally i don't see the point in them. my cousin Julianna's God parents are my Grandparents, and they haven't seen her since the dedication ceremony in '03.
and when i was pregnant everyone and their mother was claiming they were gonna be her Godmother, so as far as NC, its just a glorified title. its not a serious title here. from what i understand of it, its someone who is supposed to take over if something were to happen to the parents, who promise to be a moral and finacial provider to the child. None of the people wanting to be her godparents fit that bill, for one reason or another. and some are going through things right now, that i wouldn't want to burdon them with it. if i were to HAVE to choose.
so, personally i DONT see a point in it, but im not knocking it either!
Ours will, but we see it more as honoring those closest to us that we hope will also be great influences in our children's lives rather than someone to actually take our kids if we die. I'd leave that in the will.
I don't think we will. Neither DH or I are very religious (apart from being baptised when I was a baby, I have never attended church), none of our friends are religious and we have a lifestyle where we and all our friends move around the world every couple of years so even if we did pick someone, they wouldn't get to see our baby that often.
We'll just stick to picking someone in our will should something happen to both DH and I.
Eleanor Noelle - 18/05/12
Claire Elisabeth - 16/-5/10
I am the godmother to my niece who is Catholic and I am not Catholic. I was able to be the godmother because my husband who is Catholic, is the godfather. As long as one of the godparents is Catholic and in good standing with the church that is all that matters. We were not married at the time either.
We are religious, but grew up with different religious backgrounds. I grew up Presbyterian/Lutheran and my husband went to nondenominational churches. His family believes in "dedicating" babies and people choosing to be baptized at adults. My family believes in baptizing babies and choosing to confirm one's faith, or be confirmed when older. ANYWAY, I've was baptized, but did not have godparents, because the church congregation acts as sponsors to help the child "grow in his/her faith", etc. My husband will be baptized at the Presbyterian church where we go at the same time as our first baby. We will not have godparents, but we will name people in our will who we would like to raise our children if we both died.
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religious or not, it's great for kids to have an adult they can look to for advice, someone neutral who is not a parent, that they can turn to for moral support or advice. as parents, being able do decide who that person should be is a comfort to the parents and a help when a parent can't always find the right words of guidance or immediately connect to that "tween" or frustrated six year old.
we also see it as a way of bringing close friends we trust into the family.
you should find someone you trust your kids with, someone with good morals, and someone who is responsible and will remember to call your kids on important advice and be an encouraging postive influence.
You should phrase it to your husband as wanting to assign guardians in case god forbid, anything happens to you. You should go to an attorney and draft this before baby is born. My husband and I are not religious, but we absolutly beleive in assigning guardians. If something were to happen to us, there would be an all out family feud and our kids would be the ones to suffer. Its not good enough to verbally ask someone, you really must have it in writing. Good luck!!
Ours will have godparents -- though who they will be I have no idea. We are not Catholic, but we both have godparents that are important to us.
One misconception I hear a lot is that godparents take the child if the parents die....silly. The purpose of godparents is religious, not legal. We will have a will determining where the kids would go if something happened to us, and it will not necessarily be their godparents.
If it's important to you, DH should respect that. It's one more person in a child's life that is extra-special loving toward him/her and what child doesn't need that?
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I am kind of torn about godparents! My boyfriend was raised Catholic and comes from a large Spanish family on one side and large Irish family on the other side, so naturally everyone has godparents in his family. However, neither of us are particularly religious. Anyway, he wants to have his best friend be the baby's godfather. Does this mean his best friend's wife would be the godmother or do I pick someone? What is the role exactly, especially if it is not in a religious sense?
Our son won't have godparents. But that is because the purpose of godparents for us is who will take care of our son should we pass away. Since we have a 16 old girl from my husband's first marriage, if either of our parents or siblings are unable to take care of our son, more than likely his sister will be his guardian.
The both of us doubt that we will die before he is five (we may be testing God's will but we are hoping for the best).
I had godparents and saw no use in them personally but they are a personal choice. Prayerfully, your husband will support your choice.
By the way, Hispanic to me means Mexican. If so, where? My husband is originally from Alcapulco.
Being a Godparent involves developing a relationship with the child and helping the parents in his/her spiritual upbringing. There are many different ways of carrying out your duties as Godparent, but one of the most important things to do is tobuild a relationship with your Godchild. Make time to see your godchild as regularly as you can. Try to give him or her one-to-one attention.
Are your views on religion, spirituality and morality similar to the god parents you have chosen?If they are, all well and good. If not, this need not be an obstacle. Parents may choose a particular person because your views are different. But make sure as the parent you know their views and are happy with them before you decide upon them. There are a surprising number of fantastic Godparents out there who are non-Christian but still bring up their Godchildren within the spirit of the Christian values.
I have a god daughter and one day after a death of her mother?s friend, she asked me what happened to him. (She was then 4 years old). I was so nervous to answer her because I wanted to answer her in a way that she would understand and I wanted to make sure I was answering her in a christen way, (the way I promised I would always guide her). Not knowing what to say to her, I took a deep breath and the answer just started to flow. I explained to her that he was hurting really bad and Jesus asked him if he wanted to stay with his mom and hurt really bad all the time or to go with him to heaven and never hurt ever again. And he decided to go with Jesus. She understood. I promised to do all in my power to support her in her life in Christ. And at that moment I chose to attend church more regularly than I have been to set an example, and have been trying ever since to keep my oath as a Sponsor.
You can explain to your DH, as an alternative, a more simple blessing or thanksgiving can be given in which the child is blessed and thanks is given for its safe arrival into the world, but no promises are made by the both of you or on behalf of the child. The christening/baptism can be held when the child is older and more able to understand what baptism involves. This way your child can decide whether or not to follow Jesus Christ, and no church service has the power to force a child to make a particular choice.
Oh, and to answer your question, yes, my baby girl will have god parents. (You probably figured that out already though)
My kids will. I'm Lutheran, DH is Catholic but we're raising the kids Lutheran (had this conversation with him way before we even got engaged), and it's important to me to raise them in my faith. I think, though, there is a difference between God parents--who are people recognized in your faith as being responsible for your children and the guardians who will raise them, heaven forbid something should happen. For this first baby, I picked the baby's god parents and will let DH pick the next baby's god parents...but in the will both kids will go to the same people (who are incidentally, the first baby's god parents).
Our son will have Godparents, but we're not really looking at it in a religious sense - moreso as a decision as to who will take over guardianship of him should we die.
The people we picked are good friends of ours, they're married and are unable to have children of their own though they've tried through rounds and rounds of costly IVF. He is Lutheran and she is agnostic as far as I know, which mirrors DH and I's attitude towards religion since he is a practicing Methodist and I am agnostic.
Your husbands hesitancy to pick godparents sounds less like an issue with the godparents and more with the issue of religion. If you're planning on having these individuals be traditional godparents in the religious sense - as spitual guidence counselors so to speak - he might be envisioning this huge religious overtone to their envolvement which may turn him off if he's not as devout as you. If you explain to him that their title is merely one of affection and less of action he may soften on the issue, that is if that's what you want. If you do intend for these people to be religious partners in the childs life maybe you need to have a serious heart to heart with your DH about the spiritual future of your child and what you and he both envision for him/her in that arena.
Re: Will your kids have godparents?
I'm glad you can relate. We usually don't have a lot of difference in culture, because I've become very Americanize but I wish he'd understand more why some things are important to me.
This isn't true. I just went to a catholic baptism for a family friend's baby. The parents were not even married by a catholic priest. (They were married by the bride's brother who got certified over the internet!) The rule is one of the two godparents needs to be a baptized catholic. Neither of them need to be married, and one of them can even be of another religion.
We're catholic. We'll be having godparents.
BFP #2 1/22/2012 ~ DS2 & DD ~ BIRTHday 9/13/2012 ~ unplanned C-section @ 38w1d
Godparents- Sponsors (godparents) and parents present the infant for Baptism. The role of the sponsor is to help the baptized person to lead a Christian life and to fulfill the obligations connected with it. The Church has established the following requirements for sponsors (Godparents):
1. Sixteen years of age or older.
2. Must have received the Sacraments of Initiation, namely Baptism, Confirmation, and Eucharist.
3. If married, marriage must have been witnessed by a Catholic priest or by special exception approved by the Archbishop.
4. Presently active in the practice of the Faith by celebrating the Eucharist and receiving the sacraments regularly.
If you cannot sign a statement swearing that the above four requirements are true, you are not eligible in Canon Law to stand as a sponsor, and cannot be given an Eligibility Certificate by the Pastor or DRE.
Note: Only one sponsor is necessary, however if there are twosponsors, they should be of different genders. A baptized Christianwitness may take the place of the second sponsor but he/she mustbe a practicing member of a Christian church.
Letter of Eligibility- Sponsors from parishes other than St.Basil's are requested to present a certificate of eligibilityissued by their parish.
These are the Godparents/Sponsor guidlines from my parish website/handbook. Like I said I don't know if this is an across the board requirement or just my Parish
My DH is Chinese and we have the same issue as you ladies I am Hispanic... But my DH just goes with the flow!
"This ribbon has been reported." - lovesnina
We are practicing Catholics and will have Godparents.
DH adn I have each been Godparents three times and have only one time been asked to produce a letter stating that we attended church (from our current church). I think that although guidelines exist about being a practicing member of the religion the child is being baptised in or having your marriage be done/witnessed by a priest I think that many churches do not do any follow up on if the Godparents have met these requirements.
TTC #2 since April 2012
Year 1 - nothing
Year 2 - two m/c
Year 3 - unexplained diagnosis & 4 failed IUIs with Clomid/Letrozole
Year 4 - still unexplained & 3 failed IUIs with Follistim & Ovidral
Year 5 - trying on our own
~~ married 8.11.07
~~ DD1 1.16.11 ~~ DD2 1.3.14 ~~
~~ BFP3 12.22.15 MMC 2.29.16 @ 13 weeks ~~
~~ 2 D&Cs (3.1.16 and 3.10.16) for MMC
~~ BFP4 10.27.16 MMC 1.23.17 @ 16 weeks ~~ D&E 1.26.17 ~~
KWIM??
Thats a good idea and I would be more than comfortable doing it the way you suggested, as its our sisters. I also have a very hard time with spouses being Godparents, because of my own personal/family experiences. I don't have anything against this for anyone else!!
It's something that we have to discuss. My IL are pretty much the deciding factor and me being Catholic means nothing to them. They are the only ones that matter, kind of mentality.
I am Jewish and DH is Catholic. I don't think we'll have godparents. DH grew up with them but was only close with his godmother (aunt). I would prefer not to do this. We will not baptize the baby. There is a Jewish naming ceremony and I'm hoping that DH will agree to modify this so that we have a way to welcome the baby to the family/world without it being religious.
Not being baptized is a point of contention with my ILs. Oh well.
This depends on the parish. This was one of the first things I asked about when we were getting married. Just a quick background...I was previously married, we needed an annulment to get married in the Catholic church. They (of course) dragged their feet with the processing so DH and I got married outside the Church. We will have the marriage blessed if and when the Catholic church ever decides that I am worthy. In the meantime, I asked the priest of DH's parish about our future children and godparents. There is absolutely no way that DH's irresponsible sister would be made a godmother over my non-Catholic sister. He told me that as long as one of the godparents is Catholic, the other does not have to be, and that they could both be godparents.
These will probably be separate from the guardians of our children. The legal guardians will most likely be my sister and her DH. DH and I are the guardians of their new son and any other children that they have.
ETA: My sister is married and it was not witness by a Catholic priest. It really does depend on the parish, not the written laws of the Catholic church. They are up to interpretation depending upon how liberal or conservative the parish is.
I had godparents (they both passed in a car accident when I was little...another story). My husband has godparents...along with every child that is born in either of our families!!
So...yes, my children will have godparents!! I think it's a great tradition and bonding throughout the families!!
I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. I am from Brazil and I have godparents. Although I am not Catholic, I told my DH that I wanted out child to have godparents. He told me it was pointless and that we weren't Catholic, so why bother.
The way I put it was that if it didn't mean anything to him, but it had meaning to me, then he shouldn't mind it at all. I love my godparents and I want my child to have that same bond that I had. Although it is a Catholic tradition, it is also cultural because so many in Brazil ARE Catholic. I don't know where your family is originally from, but I am guessing that it is the same circumstance there. If you feel the need for your child to have that relationship, I say go for it. I also have adopted American traditions for DH and he can just deal with this one.
Boa Sorte! (Good luck!)
My husband has godparents and I don't, we both grew up Christian and are still practicing Christians, and for him it was just a different word for guardians, so we aren't having actual godparents, just guardians.
Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010
natural m/c March 11, 2011 at 8 1/2 weeks
Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012
Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks
Daughter #3 - January 19, 2014
Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012. We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!
When my future sister-in-law told me that she wanted me and her brother (my now husband, we were not married yet) it meant so much to me. To me, it meant that she already saw me as her sister and her son's aunt, even though I was not married into their family yet.
Godparents are very important to the life of a child, we are there to guide and lead. We are not just there for religious reasons. I consider myself and my husband to be more than just his aunt and uncle.
She and her husband will be godparents of our children, along with my sister and her husband, one day. So actually our children will hopefully have twice as many godparents, and be twice as loved!
i think your hubby is being insensitive.
i was brought up catholic, but i never had any Godparents. Personally i don't see the point in them. my cousin Julianna's God parents are my Grandparents, and they haven't seen her since the dedication ceremony in '03.
and when i was pregnant everyone and their mother was claiming they were gonna be her Godmother, so as far as NC, its just a glorified title. its not a serious title here. from what i understand of it, its someone who is supposed to take over if something were to happen to the parents, who promise to be a moral and finacial provider to the child. None of the people wanting to be her godparents fit that bill, for one reason or another. and some are going through things right now, that i wouldn't want to burdon them with it. if i were to HAVE to choose.
so, personally i DONT see a point in it, but im not knocking it either!
I don't think we will. Neither DH or I are very religious (apart from being baptised when I was a baby, I have never attended church), none of our friends are religious and we have a lifestyle where we and all our friends move around the world every couple of years so even if we did pick someone, they wouldn't get to see our baby that often.
We'll just stick to picking someone in our will should something happen to both DH and I.
Eleanor Noelle - 18/05/12 Claire Elisabeth - 16/-5/10
religious or not, it's great for kids to have an adult they can look to for advice, someone neutral who is not a parent, that they can turn to for moral support or advice. as parents, being able do decide who that person should be is a comfort to the parents and a help when a parent can't always find the right words of guidance or immediately connect to that "tween" or frustrated six year old.
we also see it as a way of bringing close friends we trust into the family.
you should find someone you trust your kids with, someone with good morals, and someone who is responsible and will remember to call your kids on important advice and be an encouraging postive influence.
Ours will have godparents -- though who they will be I have no idea. We are not Catholic, but we both have godparents that are important to us.
One misconception I hear a lot is that godparents take the child if the parents die....silly. The purpose of godparents is religious, not legal. We will have a will determining where the kids would go if something happened to us, and it will not necessarily be their godparents.
If it's important to you, DH should respect that. It's one more person in a child's life that is extra-special loving toward him/her and what child doesn't need that?
Our son won't have godparents. But that is because the purpose of godparents for us is who will take care of our son should we pass away. Since we have a 16 old girl from my husband's first marriage, if either of our parents or siblings are unable to take care of our son, more than likely his sister will be his guardian.
The both of us doubt that we will die before he is five (we may be testing God's will but we are hoping for the best).
I had godparents and saw no use in them personally but they are a personal choice. Prayerfully, your husband will support your choice.
By the way, Hispanic to me means Mexican. If so, where? My husband is originally from Alcapulco.
Being a Godparent involves developing a relationship with the child and helping the parents in his/her spiritual upbringing. There are many different ways of carrying out your duties as Godparent, but one of the most important things to do is to build a relationship with your Godchild. Make time to see your godchild as regularly as you can. Try to give him or her one-to-one attention.
Are your views on religion, spirituality and morality similar to the god parents you have chosen? If they are, all well and good. If not, this need not be an obstacle. Parents may choose a particular person because your views are different. But make sure as the parent you know their views and are happy with them before you decide upon them. There are a surprising number of fantastic Godparents out there who are non-Christian but still bring up their Godchildren within the spirit of the Christian values.
I have a god daughter and one day after a death of her mother?s friend, she asked me what happened to him. (She was then 4 years old). I was so nervous to answer her because I wanted to answer her in a way that she would understand and I wanted to make sure I was answering her in a christen way, (the way I promised I would always guide her). Not knowing what to say to her, I took a deep breath and the answer just started to flow. I explained to her that he was hurting really bad and Jesus asked him if he wanted to stay with his mom and hurt really bad all the time or to go with him to heaven and never hurt ever again. And he decided to go with Jesus. She understood. I promised to do all in my power to support her in her life in Christ. And at that moment I chose to attend church more regularly than I have been to set an example, and have been trying ever since to keep my oath as a Sponsor.
You can explain to your DH, as an alternative, a more simple blessing or thanksgiving can be given in which the child is blessed and thanks is given for its safe arrival into the world, but no promises are made by the both of you or on behalf of the child. The christening/baptism can be held when the child is older and more able to understand what baptism involves. This way your child can decide whether or not to follow Jesus Christ, and no church service has the power to force a child to make a particular choice.
Oh, and to answer your question, yes, my baby girl will have god parents. (You probably figured that out already though)
Hope I was helpful.
Our son will have Godparents, but we're not really looking at it in a religious sense - moreso as a decision as to who will take over guardianship of him should we die.
The people we picked are good friends of ours, they're married and are unable to have children of their own though they've tried through rounds and rounds of costly IVF. He is Lutheran and she is agnostic as far as I know, which mirrors DH and I's attitude towards religion since he is a practicing Methodist and I am agnostic.
Your husbands hesitancy to pick godparents sounds less like an issue with the godparents and more with the issue of religion. If you're planning on having these individuals be traditional godparents in the religious sense - as spitual guidence counselors so to speak - he might be envisioning this huge religious overtone to their envolvement which may turn him off if he's not as devout as you. If you explain to him that their title is merely one of affection and less of action he may soften on the issue, that is if that's what you want. If you do intend for these people to be religious partners in the childs life maybe you need to have a serious heart to heart with your DH about the spiritual future of your child and what you and he both envision for him/her in that arena.